Jugo hanashi daitai Ace

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i.

When had it first happened? When was the first time you touched my lips? I'm wondering if it even meant anything to you. You haven't even touched my hand since that happened. It kind of makes a girl curious, you know? You didn't even look at me.

You didn't even kiss me. Why was that, exactly?

Ever since then, you know, it's been awkward. When I look at you, you notice and turn away. I don't get to see you very often, so it… it almost hurts when you do that. We only get to see each other by chance, so when you're not around, then… then… I don't know. You're kinda my first friend, so I guess I could say I miss you without it being too weird? Mmm… I guess that's it. Well, either way, I like being around you. I enjoy your company a lot. I don't know why you touched my lips, but I saw something in your expression when you did. Even though your fingers were soft, even though your eyes wouldn't meet mine, I know I saw something. I don't know the right word, maybe, but I think I know what it was. Instinctively.

You were sad. Even though I didn't understand why, I wanted to help you. I really did. You just didn't give me a chance, because you moved away suddenly and didn't say anything more. I followed you through the crowd, confused, but only your bare back ever met my eyes. You didn't even turn to see that I was alright, or that I was keeping up. That wasn't like you. The man I knew would have waited for me, or he would have turned it into a game. But you didn't even look at me.

So how was I supposed to notice that it meant so much? How was I supposed to tell that you loved me?
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ii.

You hardly ever wore a shirt. In fact, I don't think I can remember you in one ever since I've met you. Then again, you're made of fire, so I guess you're so hot, you'd just burn it off? I'm not sure. But, I've always wanted to make you try one on, just for fun. The shits and giggles, you know?

Well, on that island, I did it. It was a spring island, warm and sunny—really, it felt more like a summer island, but it was as wet as spring. You and I met up by chance, like we always do, and you smiled. I decided then, looking thoughtfully at your chest. I was going to give you an entirely new outfit, if only for the time you were here. I figured you'd look good with black, like your hair, a tight shirt, for sure. I had a bit too much fun, maybe, but it's alright, because if you didn't wear the clothes, I'd wear them myself. I knew you would wear it, no matter if I asked or not. You were just such a nice person, so why wouldn't you?

I paid a lot for those clothes, you know. More than a thousand berries. Maybe that's a lot for me to be spending, but they had such amazing clothes there. The same neon punk style I loved. I didn't know if you'd be comfortable in the outfit at first, of course, because everyone has to get used to it—but I knew for a fact that you would look good.

But when you put on the shirt for the first time, it rested on you for only a second, and the next I think I really remember, we were both looking down at the pile on the floor, ashes, which had once been a really, really nice black shirt which I would have taken for myself had you not wanted it in the long run. You just grinned.

"Maybe I'm just too damn hot for my own good."

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. All I knew was that I was thankful you hadn't changed your pants.
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iii.

Often times, when you're not around, I wonder about your hat. Is it happy? Is it sad? If it were a person, what would it be like? It just seems like it has so much personality that I have to wonder. Well, maybe it's just me.

But, what is it saying? Is it both? Is it trying to show that those are the two extremes of the human body? Is it simply trying to make a statement? Maybe it's just confused. Well, there is that… oh! Or, maybe it's unsure! You know, just like Mr. Bon 2 Clay! It could be… it could be… androgynous! Hah! I didn't even know I knew that word, woah…

…Wait, but "androgynous" would mean it's either male or female. But it's sad and happy.

So that's different.

…I don't think I'm ever going to solve that mystery of a hat. So, for now, it's just a mystery hat, in the same way you and your brother are both mystery people.
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iv.

When was it, exactly, that you saved me? I'm just wondering, because I should probably make it into my own personal holiday. Something like that.

I can't remember when. I just remember that you ended my days as a bounty hunter—you ended my days as "Matoko" and to me, there isn't anything in this world that can repay that. I think back on those days and… and I just can't find any excuses for it. I was brainwashed, yes, had my free will broken, perhaps, but still. There is no excuse for taking so many lives. There isn't any way people can forgive Matoko for what she had done. So I changed myself.

You saved me after I had been hunting you for several months, I know that, but Matoko's sense of time is distorted because she's gone. If I had to guess, I would say it was five months, but I don't remember. I only remember… you took me somewhere after you knocked me out, healed me and fed me—but we were separated. We met again, months later, but you didn't know it was me. I don't really blame you.

Matoko was a good little robot-minded killing machine; she wore only black, loose clothes, kept her hair long and didn't touch it because her master liked it. She wore her hair straight and perfect, and didn't speak unless spoken to. And you… you broke that. You made her speak without speaking to her. You made her angry, because you played games with her. She hadn't ever been challenged like that before, and didn't know if she enjoyed or hated it yet.

Then there was me: Junko. Junko wore bright, flashy clothes which clashed and worked at the same time. She had choppy, uneven, orange-red hair and she was loud, bright and cheerful, if a bit dense, and just a tad slow. She adored you, you know. She still does, maybe even more than before. She… I feel weird around you, I don't really get it. Kind of happy and floaty. Kind of the way I used to get whenever I saw Luffy. But now…

Junko… Hm.

I picked that name on my own, you know, because I liked the way it sounded. "Junk". That's what I felt like, but the meaning was so pretty, I liked the name even more. It meant, "pure child". Well, that's technically what I was now. I wasn't Matoko, I was a new person, someone who hadn't been exposed to the world yet. Matoko only knew darkness. Maybe Junko will only know light, thanks to you.
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v.

We played it safe, for the most part. We only met in quiet places, for the most part. And we never touched, for the most part. It's really too bad you tried to make all those rules. You should have known I wouldn't listen to them. I can't help it; when I see you there's just… just… something that bubbles in my chest, kind of like when you're lying on the beach, where the water can reach, and it tickles your sides. I don't think you've felt that in a long time, considering your devil fruit, but still. I'm sure you remember it.

I just couldn't help it. You make me smile, and when I'm around you, I just… I just want to be right next to you, so I can see you smile and take in every freckle, every laugh, every stray hair that falls in your face. It almost feels like that's all I need to get by in life, for the rest of my life. Not food, not drink, just my best friend by my side forever.

I don't know how to tell you, though. You don't want me with you, I know that, because you're going after some dangerous guy and blah, blah, blah. But really, I want to go with you. I don't think I could be able to just "meet up by chance" anymore. You frown whenever I talk about it, though, or whenever I touch your arm.

But I like hugging you, I like being able to know you're real by touching your hand, or your arm. We don't have long together whenever we meet, so really, how can I help touching you? How can I help anything anymore, when it's gotten to the point I can't stand being apart from you?
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vi.

"So you're the girl? I heard the rumor—you got the boys, wrapped around your finger."

When you're walking into the bar towards me, that song comes on the radio, a teen's voice blasting through the dated speakers. It sounds fuzzy, but I pause for only a second in my drinking and look over at you from behind the glass.

"Such a sweet…! Heartbreaker—if you're the game, I wanna be a player."

I don't know this song, but somehow, the riffs and the voice are reminding me of you.

"Oh, you could do whatever you want—it's alright with me…!"

Why is this reminding me of you?

"Why don't you break my heart? Make it hurt so bad…!"

Do I see you singing it because your voice almost reminds me of the boy's?

"Come and give it your best, nothing less, I want it just like that…!"

Or is it… applying to myself? I'm not sure.

"Why don't you break my heart? It sounds good to me…!"

It's probably reminding myself of me.

"Do it over, again, again, again—you're just what I need."

You see me sitting directly at the bar and smile, moving away from a middle aged man who had engaged you in conversation. So polite.

"Why don't you break my heart? Yeah, break it."

You're going to wind up killing me, most likely. I'm not quite sure what it is I'm feeling, why you sometimes look at me so sadly, or why we get awkward sometimes. I really don't know.

"Stare me down, intimidate me. Baby, please, you'll never break me."

"Junko." You smile, so warmly, I feel like something in my stomach is fluttering, but I think it might just be the liquor. I mean, I've had several glasses, so that could, logically, be the cause.

…Right?

"Bring it on, 'cause I can take it. You're so cool, the way you're playing."

I kinda wonder if you're even noticed that sometimes I get tongue-tied and can't look at you. I mean, it's a bit weird, don't you think? I don't quite understand it myself. It's a nice feeling, I guess, but it hurts a lot at the same time. Maybe I'm just tired.

"Oh, you could do whatever you like, it's alright with me…!"

"It's been awhile."

"Yeah, it has been." I smile widely, because I really am happy to see you. You're always so cheery, how could I not be? Well, not 'cheery'. but in a laid-back good mood. I love you for that.

…Woah. Love? That's kind of a huge thought. Would that be it?

"Why don't you break my heart? Make it hurt so bad…!"

Do you even notice how I'm floundering?

"Come and give it your best, nothing less, I want it just like that."

You're sitting there, leaning against the counter, and I'm looking away, smiling at the bartender. Of course you don't notice. Why would I be thinking you might have?

"Why don't you break my heart? It sounds good to me…!"

It's too confusing.

"Do it over again, again, again, you're just what I need."

The song's going by faster, and the colors are blurring. You're laughing, but I'm so confused and it's not anything I can comprehend anymore. I think I'm tipsy, but I'm not really too sure.

"Why don't you break my heart? Yeah, break it. Come one, break my heart; break it."

At one point, I was supposed to kill you, you know. Wait, why am I remembering that now? Maybe I'm drunk…

"Why don't you break my heart? Make it hurt so bad…! Come on and give it your best, nothing less—I want it just like that."

Somewhere along the way, we've turned into this.

"Why don't you break my heart? It sounds good to me…! do it over again, again, again—you're just want I need."

A pair of friends, I guess we would be called. You are my friend, you know. My best friend. I love you.

…But only like a friend.

"Why don't you break my, why don't you break my, why don't you break my heart…!"

I'm afraid to say you're anything else—you'll wind up stepping all over me without realizing it, and sooner or later, you'll be gone and too far for me to reach.

So just break my heart already.
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vii.

I think I said something to you once, along the lines of, "You're kind of like a porn star, you know?"

You just looked at me and went, "What?" as if it was the stupidest thing you'd ever heard me say. And it probably was. I don't even remember why I thought of it, but I have to admit that, looking back at it:

It was a pretty good conversation starter.
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viii.

When I found out about you being in Impel Down, I felt like… like… I felt like killing someone. I wanted to murder someone—anyone—who was stupid enough to even try putting you in there. I was with you when you were fighting with Blackbeard. I was watching, from one of the banana rocks, waiting—I thought you would win, because the only person who I had met and knew to be as strong as you was Luffy. And Luffy, I knew, could overcome anything. It was just the way you people with "the Will of D" were.

But you lost, and I… I wasn't sure what I would do. I turned on Blackbeard's nakama, fighting them; I wanted to kill something, and I would settle for them. I knew what you would say, though. You would have looked at me and shook your head, before rumpling my hair with a sigh.

"An eye for an eye makes the world blind, kid. You know that."

I couldn't help it! It wasn't that you lost—I could care less about that, honestly! It was that… you had been looking for Blackbeard for so long, that, to lose to him now… I couldn't imagine how it felt. I couldn't ask you how it felt. Blackbeard knocked me out in a second and left with you over his shoulder, and left me for dead on that blood-covered cliff. I couldn't accept it.

"Ace…!"
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ix.

Shabondy Archipelago. That's where I found out about the execution. A public execution? It's as if they were mocking us pirates with this, saying, "There's nothing you can do now—he's gone."

I couldn't accept that. Luffy, who I had been traveling with, having the good graces to have met him, didn't find out then, and I didn't get a chance to tell him before Bartholomew Kuma showed up and blasted us all away. But I heard about it, I was going to tell Luffy, but… but, instead, I flew away for three days and nights before finally landing.

Now, I don't know who this "Bartholomew Kuma" person is, besides his status as one of the seven warlords of the sea, but I can't help but feel… almost as if he's not the bad guy. That was the second time he had helped us.

I say he helped us, because he, at least, helped me. I landed on the same island as the Whitebeard pirates. I had to force my way through to Whitebeard, of course, but I did, and told him everything about us—how we were friends, and how you had saved me, and now I wanted to return the favor. I got down on my hands and knees and begged for you, I begged to be allowed to help you. And he agreed.

Oh, God, if only we could know that you were safe. If only… if only I could hear you. Then I would know why my chest aches so much right now, and why I feel so listless. Somehow, I wanted to hear your voice, Ace. I wanted so much to hear you, to see your stupid grin and your freckles and your messy black hair and your hat—I just wanted to know that I could see you again someday. I think that, if I lost you, I would become some sort of hermit. I mean, my first friend, the person I consider my savior? How was I supposed to live knowing you were going to be killed?

Stupid Ace. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I love you, I like you, I care about you, I don't know the way to say it, but the feelings are all the same. There's something pricking the back of my legs when I stand still, something screaming at me to go get you, do something. Damn it, Ace, I don't care if it worries you—I would do anything for you, because nothing can repay saving me.
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x.

Once, we were in a bar in a shady island. I was there on business, and you offered to help—you had time, if only a bit, before you had to continue searching. You really have no idea how I happy I was to see you.

You were forty minutes late, of course, but that's so like you that I can't even be upset. I was already in the bar, and you thought I was drunk. Maybe I was, but I sober up fast. There was an old man in the bar, and I talked to him for twenty minutes trying to get information about the guy I needed to find from him. Those twenty minutes were spent drinking with him and trying to keep his hands off me.

Those twenty minutes were a waste. He was the guy.

You arrived when I was still irritated about being played, and that guy came over after once you had walked up to me with that smile, asking, "Do you know this man?"

"…Yes…"

"Is he your husband?"

"No!"

"Good."

You looked after him, blinking, and I laughed, smacking your arm overdramatically.

"Hah HAH! Can you imagine me being married to someone who made me wait forty minutes in a shady bar? Hah hah hah! The thought is so ridiculous!"

You winced, and looked at me apologetically. "Sorry."

"It's fine. Just don't do it again."

"Right…"

We didn't stay there long. I'm pretty sure I was drunk (come on, four shots of straight alcohol? Probably), because I remember beginning to sing that I "just wanted to know someone loves me". I mean, really. I shouldn't have to be hit on by an old guy to understand someone cares about me. That's just… weird.

There was something funny in your expression when I sang those words, and you just lightly grabbed my arm and leaned down, giving me a small kiss. God, how can I even describe how something just exploded in my head? I felt like I was on fire, but maybe that was just the alcohol and the heat from your body and your lips. But I was so confused, I forgot everything else. What was I supposed to do now? How was I supposed to look at you? I tried to run, but you didn't let me; you held my arm gently, asking to walk me back to my hotel. Too polite, god damn it, too polite, too kind, too perfect.

I can't deal with that, with you, being so… oh God, what's wrong with me? I should be able to brush that off like anything else. Laugh and giggle, move along and pretend it never happened. But there was so much in such a small action, how could I ignore it?

Ace, you're driving me crazy. If this keeps up, I might really fall for you.
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xi.

The sea breeze is the love in the air. Islands and the disappearing reflections. Blood on the scarring wind.

The rum is for drinking, not burning, Junko, hah hah!

But Ace, it makes such a pretty color when it burns!

Squint hard enough, you can see the silver lining. (Such a thing exists? It must be worth a lot of money.) My wish was lost among all those stars in the sky, God probably just overlooked it.

You love him, don't you?

Maybe. Maybe somewhere along the way, I fell in love. Wouldn't that be funny, Robin?

Not funny. Only to be expected.

Steel hearts can't see the angel's wings protruding from the seas. That's why my heart's always been sensitive. The weather's been pretty sensitive lately, too, you know. Raindrops and snowfall, and even flower petals—little ones, to boot. It took forever for them to wash off the deck.

Scream me a love song, Ace, scream to me that you're alive, I really don't care anymore. Just to see you would make me cry, it would make me smile, I would die.

We're too far gone to be pure, my girl. That's why we can use dirty tactics to get him back. But we can't just ask them to return him, scare them into releasing him.

But I can dream, can't I, Whitebeard, sir? I mean, I dream of him every night as it is.

Do you, now?

I do. I miss him so much that I guess I can't help it.

Only one piece of paper! (Hee hee, I probably shouldn't laugh at that.) But, being serious, that's all I have from you. A piece of paper. I think you gave one to Luffy too, right? It's a life force card. I can't look at it, though. Not when I know it's only getting smaller and smaller with every passing day. I'm not all too sure quite what it means, but I do know that it's not a good thing. But… if it means what I think it means, then I think I'm going to wind up screaming. Or something.

We have broken hearts upon this ship, and they're not only here, you know.

I know, Whitebeard, sir.

Broken hearts live all over the world. But for every broken heart, my girl, there's always another one.

So, they can heal each other?

Or they can harm each other more.

…Somehow, I'd like to think they could become fixed souls.

Hah hah, that's my girl. Stay optimistic.
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xii.

"Passoon! Tat is what makes eberyting wort while!"

"Passion?"

"'Tis all that gleetters upon teh sea! Eberyting tat is makeeng joo smile!"

"…Passion is my friends?"

"Anyting an' eberyting, my darleeng. Anyting and eberyting."

So passion was Ace. Huh…

Maybe I was stupid for thinking that, but she did say it was "what makes everything worthwhile," and "everything that makes you smile". So, obviously, you're going to be the first thing to pop into my head.

Especially since, at that point, you were my "anything and everything".
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xiii.

Once, as a joke, you and I pretended to be a married couple on one island, do you remember? I had so much fun, even though you kept saying weird things. All those fake fights, and those weird moments where people expected us to be affectionate… it was a blast, it really was. There was one thing you said, though—it kind of weirded me out, but made me happy and fluttery at the same time.

"Why are we only pretending?"

You smiled so widely, I thought that maybe you were joking, but there was something when I saw your eyes, melted steel, that made my laugh catch in my throat.

"Yeah… I wonder why."
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ixv.

When we get you back, I'll smile like nothing happened and give you a hug once you were feeling better. I'd even let you kiss me—I probably wouldn't even mind if you did. As long as you were alive, Ace, I don't really think anything else matters. You're really the center of my world. You and nothing else. We could smile and hold hands and eat together, and laugh—oh God, how long as it been since I last heard you laugh? Do I even remember correctly?

Your face would light up, right? You'd get this huge smile, tilt your head back and laugh, your shoulders shaking. It was a nice laugh, not like Luffy's, but nice. I could have listened to it forever, especially if it was something I did to make you laugh. You were so warm, and sometimes you would even take my hand as you laughed. You looked so adorable when you laughed. Oh God, did I really just think that? …Not that it wasn't true, but still.

…

I really think it's too late for me, Ace. I'm just hoping that, somehow, you would feel the same.
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xv.

"What would you do if I told you I love you?"

That's what I'll ask once this is all over, and once everything is calm. I'll ask it randomly, out of the blue, an innocent question. I can already picture your face, long and blinking before a smile breaks over it, a 'wow-that-took-awhile' smile. I can hear your words now:

"I'd probably ask what took you so long to realize it."

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Well, there is it. "Jugo hanashi daitai Ace"—in other words, "Fifteen stories about Ace". The character in it, as you have figured out by now, is my own. I haven't fully introduced her, of course, but she's only one of four. LOL, stealing FOUR ONE PIECE CHARACTERS. Can you dig it?

Kidding.

But, I do have four characters to introduce, and I have a prompt type thing for the main character out of those four coming out sooner or later.

Junko here is probably one of the least touched upon characters, which is why I do things like this. Because she's awesome and she needs the love! D: She really is awesome, her and her outfits are so much fun to draw.

Ohhh, right, before I forget—her and Ace take FOR-EV-ER to FINALLY admit ANYTHING to each other. To the point that it's frustrating me. D: So before anyone goes claiming she's some kind of freaking Mary-Sue, I'ma murder you, because this hardly shows anything about my darling Junko. Rah! You can't accuse her of anything without getting to know her first! So, I will not listen to any insults until the main story is out.

Which reminds me—"Modern Day Fairy Tale" might be put on hold. Also, for those of you who have read it—"A Love Like Cotton Candy" has nothing whatsoever to do with the story which involves my OCs. xD; I sometimes do stories where they have absolutely no connection to the OCs, but only to the real series. Sooo, yeah.

Ooo, and, only three One Piece guys are gonna be taken. By this story, you can probably tell Ace is one of them. xD; So, yeah. Guess the other two. I'll give you a hint: IT'S NOT CHOPPER OR USOPP. Happy guessing. (Also, don't kill me for stealing them all. LOL.)

Anyways…

I hope you all enjoyed Junko and her amazingnes. :'D

lovelovelove.

manrii.