Flat

by PaBurke

Distribution: The Nook

Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended, no money made, no characters created.

Spoilers: Batman and pre-Batman Beyond.

Summary: It's all in how you define the terms.

Word Count: 200

It had happened slowly; the costume didn't scare the rabble like it used to. Oh, once confronted with the real thing, criminals were shaking in their boots, but the idea of him didn't detour them like it had once had.

Then one very chatty thief –nearly all got talkative when pressed by the vigilante but this one had started offering advice- had told Batman the reason why: his suit was 'flat.'

That had startled an 'Excuse me," of the Dark Knight.

"Well, yeah," the thief stuttered. "You're in really good shape, but you've got to be old-old under there and everybody knows it, 'cause the old like their habits and really don't like to change their clothes. The suit's totally retro. At least if you changed the suit, it'd make people wonder. Hell, you scared my grandfather and he'd been six-feet under for years. I was half convinced that if you did catch me, you'd have a heart attack if I ran away."

Bruce was disgruntled- the doctor had mentioned an approaching heart problem- and bemused. "You obviously haven't heard of the Dread Pirate Roberts."

"Huh?" The thief shook off his ignorance. "Just saying, you need to update the bat-suit."