Epilogue

Author's Note: I do not own Twilight. Thanks so much to all you guys who have been following Jasper's pitiful mall trip!! Here it is: Last chapter!! Review, please! :]

"Well, Jazz, what have you learned today?" Emmett had a smug smile on his face and was feeling rather proud of himself.

I sighed.

Alice must have seen me suffering in that elevator what with that delicious blood smeared all over the football player's face, because when I attempted to escape 3 floors later, at yet another food court, my whole family was waiting for me.

As I dashed out of the elevator, I accidentally crashed into Emmett.

Even more unfortunate, the elevator doors had not closed yet, and the seven humans in the elevator stared wide-eyed at my mad, frantic sprint, as well as my collision with some huge laughing guy who must have looked like an extra-large bodybuilder on steroids.

Luckily for us, Alice had seen this coming, and quickly came up with a reason to excuse my desperate panting. I probably should have kept quiet on my way out of the elevator, as this made things more difficult for Alice.

As I sprinted, I was shouting, "AIR!! AIRRRR!!!!! OH, THE AROMA!!! THAT SMELL!!! AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!" Needless to say, that probably would have looked like a very strange scene to a human.

The humans' eyes on our faces, Alice quickly explained, "Sorry about that. He's…er, allergic to perfume."

Then she flashed a quick smile –I think Bella once referred to it as "dazzling" - and spun around, heading for the parking lot. As soon as we were all outside, Alice glared fiercely at me, and continued glaring at me like that until we got home.

Emmett, waiting for an answer, folded his arms across his chest and cleared his throat.

"Jazz……….what did you learn today?"

"Never agree to go shopping on a Friday."

Carlisle cocked an eyebrow. "And….?" he pressed.

I sighed once more. "Consult with Alice before getting on an elevator with delicious- smelling humans. And don't run away from Alice when she's standing in line for our makeovers, even if it is embarrassing. Because she knows what she's doing (usually) and only wants to help (usually)."

Edward chuckled a little when I thought the word "usually" in my head, but before anyone had the chance to ask what he was laughing at, Carlisle said sternly, "Good. And I certainly hope Alice's explanation was enough for those humans. Edward?"

"Oh, it was, Carlisle," Edward answered promptly. "In fact, they were so distracted by that grotesque football player to even really think about what Jasper did."

"Thank you," I said. "So I've learned my lesson. Can you please untie me now?"

_ The End _

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