A/N: SakuSasu - Please R&R - Humor - Romance - Rated T - One shot - Fluff

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

Summary: Kakashi gives Sakura "the talk".

How did I end up in an situation like this?Sakura scratched her head as she sat on the deep blue couch in her sensei's apartment. She looked around, noticing how surprisingly tidy this place is. Sensei is sure tidy, or maybe he just have someone going around tidying this place for him. She still have no idea why she was abruptly kidnapped and dragged her, for all she know, she haven't done anything wrong, Naruto and Sasuke should be the one here, you have no idea how much trouble they get in.

After sitting there for a few minutes, the pink haired medic nin with the power of Tsunade's fist stood up and stormed off to the door, deciding that she was going to punch the thing open. It didn't work.

The door had some sort of jutsu on it which made it surprisingly hard that only a very pissed off Tsunade can manage to break open with pure violence. Sakura had no chance against the door, she sighed in defeat at the fact that she could not punch the door open.

Seriously, what the hell? What sort of people kidnap their own students on lock them in their apartment? Oh wait, Kakashi, obviously.

"Tut tut Sakura, you're getting impatient." Kakashi appeared in a puff of smoke and leafs, his one eye looked carefully at his female student who sat, legs crossed on the carpet floor in his lounge.

"Of course I am getting impatient. Why the hell am I here?" Sakura demanded, standing up so she could glare at her sensei properly, he just chuckled.

"There is a few things I need to talk to you about, rather important things too. So take a seat while I get a drink." He swirled around and strolled into his small kitchen located beside the dining room, Sakura glared holes into his back.

She was still glaring into nothing when he came back into the room, he waved his hand in front of her face, wondering if his student was still on earth with him, or maybe she floated somewhere else. "Earth to Sakura." he sang in an annoying voice, bring the medic back to "Kakashi land."

"What?" She snapped.

"I thought I said take a seat."

"I know."

"Then take a seat."

"Your face should take a fucking seat!" She yelled back, no, Sakura Hurano does not appreciate that fact that she was kidnapped by someone she know. Wasn't kidnapping meant to be about taking some stranger into hostage for a certain sum of money? Since when do people you know start taking you into hostage? How does that even work in the first place?

"Langauge, Sakura." Kakashi scoulded, Sakura sure was growing up fast. Ah, youth.

"I am not a baby anymore." She pouted cutely.

"That is exactly why you are here." Kakashi grinned at his student. He placed his cup of water down on the glass coffee table and sat, he gestured for Sakura to sit down as well.

"I'm here because I am growing up?" Sakura asked, "What sort of excuse is that?"

"My type of excuse, you should know that by now." It is true that Kakashi has probably the most pathetic excuse and possible human being can come up with.

"What do you want Kakashi?"

"Hm...lets see, how much do you know about the male species?" Kakashi smiled underneath his mask.

"I hang out with Sasuke and Naruto, I think they keep me pretty informed." Sakura's innocence is a dying flower once she met Naruto, he seems to like talking about things girls don't generally want to know. It is also tragic that Sasuke, her boyfriend, seem to enjoy those conversations.

"Oh, well you should know most by now." He paused, "Have you ever got "the talk"?

""That talk"?" Sakura repeated, "You mean the sex talk?"

"Yup, that is exactly what I mean."

"Yeah I got that talk ages ago from Tsunade. Ever since I start dating Sasuke."

"That boy has hormones, a lot of them too." He was suddenly serious, "I hope you know that."

"Know what?"

"Sakura, that boy has hormones, lots of hormones, hormones that make his want you physically, everytime he looks at you he looks like he wants to eat you." Kakashi stood up dramatically, his eyes glittering. "He needs to fulfill his needs. You can only keep a guy hanging for so long."

Sakura got it eventually. "You say that I should just sleep with him before he bursts." She eyed her silver haired teacher carefully, watching his every move, checking if he is by any chance, lying to her.

"Basically......yes."

"Wow, great influence you are." Sakura sarcastically replied, rolling her eyes gently. "You actually encourage me to do that?"

"Yup." He sat back down and took a drink from his cup.

"Why should I have sex with him? We have only been dating for a year."

"Only? A year?Wow, that boy has great self control." Kakashi said to himself. Proud of his own student.

"You know... That is the reason why girls and guys are so different. All you guys think about when dating is girl is just to get them into your beds." Sakura snarled at her teacher, obviously not pleased at all.

"If that was true Sakura, Sasuke would have already left you already and went for Ino."

Ouch.

"Whatever Kakashi, can I leave now?"

"No you may not leave, that is till I give you some advice." There was a long pause, Sakura began tapping her feet against the floor impatiently.

"One, always use protection, condoms, pills, whatever. Two, try different techniques, I have books if you need any help. Three, have fun. That's all." She looked at him weirdly, wondering what is wrong with her teacher today, he must have been smoking something weird.

"Sure, thanks for the.....lovely.......aamzing........great advice you just gave me........yeah...thanks.." Sakura had trouble saying something nice and believable to her teacher. He just grinned that oh-so-annoying grin.

"You would thank my advice one day Sakura. Just you wait."

"Hey, Kakashi?" Before walking out of the bullet and Sakura-proof door, she turned around to tell her teacher something.

"Mhm."

"You desperately need a girlfriend." She smiled, "Shizune is available...if you were wondering." After saying that, she walked out of the house and slamming the door shut, smiling from ear to ear.

Kakashi just sat there blushing.

A/N:I felt that I haven't wrote anything for ages so here it is. Please go check out my other stories on my page. Thanks for reading. Also, please don't kill me Ino fans. I do not mean any harm at all, it is just for the story. I love Ino.

Please review.

Thanks for the reviewer who picked out my mistake.