Title: Frioniella: A Cinderella Parody

Disclaimer: Dissidia Final Fantasy © Square-Enix

Pairing: Frioniel (Firion)/Tidus

Rating: PG

Warning: AU, BL, OOCness, utter crack, seme in drag

Frioniella

Chapter 2: It Continues, Be Terrified

It was dusk already. Frioniella threw 'herself' exhaustedly onto 'her' old little bed. The dancing class 'she' had had with Mr. Cecil was really impressive and fun. Mr. Cecil was very kind and a very good teacher. He didn't even mind 'her' servant-like position and gladly taught 'her' with all he had. Still…

The young virgin 'girl' frowned. The fact that 'she' didn't see the duo, Butz and Zidane, the whole day made 'her' a little worried even if 'she' knew them well enough that Zidane's monkey brain wouldn't become some freak's choice of appetite and Butz wouldn't get trapped easily in some highly innovative mousetraps.

What got 'her' worried, actually, was what 'she' suspected scared the two friends away that was…the accursed odor from the evil toilet 'she' feared didn't come off her completely even as 'she' had cleaned 'herself' again and again that wonderful morning.

Having that in mind, Frioniella sat up and examined 'herself', trying to smell for the remaining of that demonic odor on 'her' virgin body. However, suddenly, there was a startling yelp coming from under the window. The girl jumped in surprise before running toward the window.

As expected, it was Zidane and Butz. From where 'she' was, 'she' could only see them huddle together working on something but 'she' couldn't exactly tell what.

"Hey, Zidane! Butz!" Frioniella called.

The duo jumped at 'her' voice before they quickly hid that something behind their backs.

"What are you doing?" The girl asked.

"Uh…" Butz laughed dryly, trying to get away with his mousy little smile. "We…"

"Ah well, the mouse here was just clumsy and got his foot stabbed by the thorn." Zidane lied smoothly.

Still, it wasn't that easy to fool Frioniella. 'She' might be young and a virgin but that didn't mean 'she' was so innocent to be ignorant and stupid.

"What are you hiding?"

"N…nothing." The charming monkey forced a laugh. "Really, Frioniella, it is quite late already. Shouldn't a lady already be in bed for her beauty sleep?"

"Zidane…" Frioniella insisted, eyeing the two friends suspiciously.

Seeing that they couldn't win against this argument, the monkey and the mouse looked at each other before…

The monkey sighed.

"Hey, Butz…"

"Yeah, Zidane…"

"1…2…"

"Leg it!!!"

The two talking animals didn't wait. They snatched that something they had been hiding before running away from the still staring Frioniella…too fast for the girl to even say 'stop'.

Unlike the widely known tale of Cinderella, Frioniella the next day found 'herself' staring at the place 'she' had been living in this entire life in utter awe. The manner was now glowing with different shades of brilliance and its shininess even rivaled that of the Royal Palace. There was not a single trace of dust left for the cruel yet radiant step mother to make 'her' clean and clean and clean over and over again.

For a long, long while, Frioniella could only stand there and stare dumbly before 'she' finally thought there was at least something 'she' could do to make this strange day of 'her' virgin life just a little more ordinary.

At least, 'she' could still sweep the backyard. And maybe the lovely smell of roasted potatoes could later attract some weird acting mice and monkeys.

Yet…

As the back door swung open with an eerie creak…

That smell Frioniella was thinking of suddenly and oh-so-generously filled 'her' nostrils...

Along with the weirdest sight of 'her' two stepsisters, whose names should have easily gotten them a job in some weather forecast TV program, crouched on the already swept ground, silently and gloomily roasted the potatoes on the dry leaves…

Or…rather setting those poor potatoes on fire.

Smoke floated high into the air as dry leaves caught fire and burnt themselves into crisps. The fire burnt so fiercely and powerfully as if being enhanced by either a spell or some unspeakable hatred turned into grudge. The smoke was so thick it looked as if it had blanketed the sky and swallowed the bright, bright sun.

And…those poor innocent potatoes were hatefully eaten and scorched into nothing but ashes by this unforgiving fire of ultimate gloomy doom.

The vision of gloominess was given a break as a strong gust of wind blew the smoke temporarily away.

"Frioniella, what is the reason that men learn of roasted potatoes?" Finally noticing Frioniella, Cloud, being in 'her' most emo mode, gloomily asked.

"Wha-" Frioniella was dumbstruck. 'She' quickly took a step back only because 'she' had feeling that if 'she' continued to look at the gloominess, 'she' too would fall into its depthless suction.

"Being alone in the world isn't wrong." Squall mumbled quietly to himself, promptly stabbing one poor potato in the middle with a stake. "The only potato…that is not burnt…also…has nothing wrong."

The sharp tip of the long iron stake pierced through the victim that was the only potato that wasn't burnt and stuck out horrifyingly to Frioniella's virgin eyes like seeing a fellow innocent human being being sentenced to a stake by the ever infamous Vlad Dracula.

Frioniella took another step back, finding it strangely nauseating as 'she' saw Squall's evil stake evilly moved as if trying to scoop the poor potato's gut inside out.

"Frioniella," Cloud spoke again, 'her' blue eyes possessing that haunted look that gave normal people goosebumps, "What is the reason of roasted potato consumption?"

With that question asked, the victim potato was successfully being gutted out by Squall who wordlessly gave Cloud a chunk. The Chocobo Head immediately popped that accursed chunk of the victim's inside into 'her' mouth, slowly chewing with unchanged face as if to enhance the horrifying effect.

Squall then finally turned, 'her' storm colored eyes addressing Frioniella with their silent death sentence of dark, brooding justice:

'Eat the potato.'

No need for counting, entirely drenched with cold sweats, Frioniella screamed with all 'her' might for the tormented soul of the poor potato before quickly running away, slamming the door to the backyard behind 'her' without even once looking back.

Never. Ever.

Frioniella's tormented scream was so loud it could be heard even miles away and Prince Tidus, taking an after breakfast nap, was startled awake with a horrified yelp as he fell of his bed unceremoniously.

The Prince hugged his most favorite blitzball tightly and tried to calm himself.

"M…man, this is really an omen." The blond prince muttered with widened eyes. He couldn't totally shake away the very image of a nameless girl being forced into Kuja's so-called fashionable 'peacock'.

The doomed girl's shrilling scream was stilling ringing in his ears as vivid as any blitzball game cheer.

Tidus hugged his beloved blitzball even tighter and prayed for the hundredth time to the fayth, hopelessly hoping that he would never have to witness the terrifying sight again.

Never. Ever.

The day passed so quickly as Frioniella hid 'herself' behind locked door in the safety of 'her' own room while Madam Light, the ever radiant stepmother was too busy admiring the wonderful shininess to have the time to worry about 'her' two beautiful daughters and Frioniella.

That was until evening approached.

As if being called by duty, reminding herself of the responsibility and debt 'her' honorable family held for the Goddess of Harmony, Cosmos, Light knew the time as if setting an alarm clock on the schedule. 'She' immediately and gracefully glided toward the kingdom of darkness where 'her' two misguided daughters had rooted themselves in.

"Cloud, Squall, dear daughters, have you done dressing?" The horned helmet wearing mother called with a pokered face and a deadpanned voice.

Yet, the fortress of gloominess was built so strong as the two weather named siblings decided to work together, doubling the pessimism force. They locked themselves in the only room in the house that had no windows and no light, bolting the multi-layered locks and strengthened the defense with good amount of tables, chairs, Vincent Valentine borrowed coffin and a Buster Sword.

But as the light was always with Light, even if the two tried their best to defend their fortress of gloominess, it was like two human soldiers working against a Troll.

Bang! Crash! Thud!

The sounds of terror continued and Frioniella had to improve 'her' security level by hiding under blanket, trying to concentrate on the most sacred wonder of the world, which was, of course, wild rose.

And as soon as it began, it ended. The scary noises faded away into muteness as Light successfully dragged Cloud and Squall out of their kingdom of darkness.

"This is a sacred mission for the Kingdom and the goddess, Cosmos. Be honored."

"But the room is still unclean." Squall quickly pointed out, tilting 'her' pretty head toward the room that was previously their fortress of dark kingdom. Their last stand was futile but it wasn't as if they hadn't thought of Plan B.

Plan B: Offer to clean and make the fortress of gloominess bright and shiny.

"Frioniella is obviously sick." Cloud said; cleverly pointing to Frioniella's close door before Light could even bestow the virgin girl another sacred duty.

"…." Actually, Light wasn't really evil. 'She' was just obsessed with brilliant shininess. And if it was for Cosmos… "You can save the cleaning for later."

With that said, the light obsessed mom, Light, solidly dragged one golden chocobo and one kitten...err…lion to finally meet the ultimatum of their crossdressing doom.

After the destructive whirlwind that was the three were gone in a flash of dazzling departure in an all too white carriage, Frioniella was then finally granted with peace. The girl slowly poked 'her' head out of 'her' room.

"They are gone, aren't they?" The young virgin girl wondered to 'herself' but…

"Yeah, they're really gone." There was a voice replying back. "But you should also hurry."

The girl then looked down and noticed it was Butz, the little mouse, standing on his two tiny feet there.

Frioniella shook 'her' head. "Nay. I can't, Butz. I don't have the dress to wear to. I will just ridicule the grand event."

"Oh yes, you have!" This time, the voice was Zidane's. The charming monkey hurled himself in from the window, dropping something into Frioniella's arms.

"A gift for my lady." Zidane winked.

The girl's eyes widened in surprise. "Butz, Zidane, where did you get this dress from…?"

The two friends looked at each other before grinning widely.

"Well, we made it ourselves with a bit of this and that from those stuffs those two gloomy girls secretly dumped behind Light's back, you know!" Butz said proudly.

"Ah, but actually, we didn't really do all the work ourselves." Zidane shrugged and gestured to the suddenly open door. "We've got a helping hand here. From this wonderful and lovely lady."

Frioniella turned and saw a pretty girl with sad eyes albeit with gentle expression standing there.

"You are…?"

"My name is Tina. Tina Brandford. Umm…from the script, I'm supposed to be your fairy godmother but since I don't have a spell for the dress, this is…what I think I can do…to help."

The 'fairy godmother' said hesitantly as if unsure of herself.

Zidane turned and gave her an assuring smile.

"Let's get changed, Frioniella!" Butz chirped happily.

And because the stress of the entire exhausting day started to get to her, the authoress had become lazy and decided to extend a two-shot into a three-shot instead. With help from the lovely 'fairy godmother', would Frioniella be able to go to the ball as she had hoped? Would this story end, fortunately, with a not-to-freaky ending?

Still interested for the answer? More craziness?

Please…stay tuned!

To Be Continued

So…the two-shot has extended into a three-shot instead. I'm sorry for being too lazy but…yeah, I'll finish this in the next chapter. XP

Anyway, reviews are pretty much welcomed, as always. XD~