Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto

First fic of the year, another SaiSaku in a different style this time. I hope you like it.

Paper Roses and Real Roses

You stand there cool and aloof, silent and still. The black robe you are wearing is darker than your usual clothes. I think it suits you better for it brings out even more, the pallor in your cheeks and the slight silver sheen of your pale, white skin. I know your hands, resting in your side pockets are cold, icy cold. You stare vacantly up ahead, but no, you are not in a daze, you are concentrating, taking in every detail of the dark mahogany coffin lined with white roses on the table five metres away and the lifeless features on the face of the body lying within.

You extract a slim paintbrush, the one Naruto stuffed down your Christmas sock a year ago from the small pack you are carrying and also a thin piece of paper. Do I catch a trace of cherry scent? I think I do. Four beautiful strokes and there, the single most beautiful rose I have ever seen printed on the paper in black and white. You never do need any ink do you, Sai. It flows from your heart, through your fingers and into the paintbrush. I was anticipating the familiar seal I've seen you do countless times, waiting to see the ink come to life but instead, to my disappointment you fold up the small square of paper, into half and then a quarter and tuck it deep within your robe. As if no one else, apart from yourself will see it.

And then your eyes shift back once again to the coffin. I can see what is in your mind right now despite your neutral exterior. The slight clench of your fists, the tilt of your head, the slow, long breaths, you are remembering. In a fleeting moment when waking and dreaming collide, you realize that it is your last chance and your right hand lifts up an inch to where your ink rose lies, closest to your heart.

But your hand falls down again barely a split second later when a sharp anguished cry pierces the silence as the mother of the dead body loses her mind and you are suddenly aware of the many grieving people around you. You want to so badly but you do not shed a tear and the rose lies hidden within the folds of your robe. You guard your painful secret steadfastly and devotedly, but why hide Sai? Why hide?

Come over and say goodbye.

-End-