Disclaimer: Don't own the characters. Please read and review, I will return the favour for the first ten reviewers.
Chapter 1
Napoleon raced through the maze, determined to reach the cup first. He spotted Cedric Diggory running towards it as well. The both reached the cup at the same time and were transported to an abandoned graveyard. On one of the graves were two words: Tom Riddle.
Gosh! Not Voldemort again! Before he knew what happened, there was a green flash and Cedric was dead. Out of the corner of his eye, Napoleon saw a hooded figure emerge from the grave. A dementor! Summoning the happiest thought he could, Napoleon pointed his wand in the right direction and shouted "EXPECTO PATRONUM!" Out of the tip of his wand burst a silver llama that raced over and started spitting at the dementor, the dementor hastily glided away and vanished in the distance. Gee! I sure do love llamas, they're awesome!
Suddenly, Pettigrew appeared out of nowhere and sliced Napoleon's arm, putting the blood into a huge cauldron. Napoleon, who isn't known for his superior intellectual skills, stood there dumbly with his mouth open and said "What'd ya do that for?"
Pettigrew ignored him and proceeded to mutter some incantation. Napoleon meanwhile was inspecting the hairs on his toes and wondering what would happen if he put some in the cauldron. Sneakily, he pulled some out and threw them in without Pettigrew noticing. Napoleon then watched as Pettigrew finished and Voldemort stepped out of the cauldron. Only, something was different, Voldermort was covered in long hair the same colour and texture as Napoleon's toe hair.
Voldemort wasn't pleased with this and punished Pettigrew with verbal abuse as he didn't have his wand at that stage. When he finally found out that it was Napoleon's fault he started a duel with Napoleon, who found the whole ordeal rather amusing and didn't bother hiding the fact. In the middle of the duel, a golden ball of light went into Voldemort's wand and a ghost-like form of Cedric Diggory emerged.
"Napoleon, take my body, take my body back to my father" the ghost begged
"Can't you see I'm a little bit busy? I am fighting the Dark Lord, only the most powerful wizard of all time. Gosh!" Napoleon exclaimed
The ghost of Cedric looked rather sad so Napoleon added "Though, if you pay me…"
"How am I supposed to pay you?" the ghost demanded "I'm dead!"
"Not my problem. Yours." Napoleon added
"Fine! My father will pay you" the ghost promised
"Okay" Napoleon said and broke the connection with Voldemort's wand. He then raced over to Cedric's body and accioed the portkey to him. Napoleon appeared at the ring and was welcomed by screams.
In the end, Napoleon was rewarded with a large sum of money and lived happily ever after. Meanwhile, Voldemort was so preoccupied with keeping his hair levels low by shaving and was unable to focus on taking over the world. So Napoleon was a hero, though when Voldemort finally does get control of his hair problems, he won't be a very happy cookie. Will he?