Disclaimer: I do not own Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance. I only owe this plot and the words used to tell this story…
Story Summary:"Just let me be Elincia for tonight is my last day. Tomorrow I shall be a symbol and I will put asleep the feelings that led me here today," she said and Ike did. :: Elincia x Ike ::
Universe: Fire Emblem 9: Path of Radiance, post-game.
Status: Complete. Published 02-12-09 -- Finished 02-12-09.
Story's Key: "Talking" – 'Emphasis' -- Thinking
Requested by: haha169 (misken67)
Author's notes: It was until now that I finally found both the time and inspiration for writing it. I am sorry if Elincia seemed a bit OOC (wrote her a bit bolder) but I couldn't help it, otherwise the idea would not have worked. Everyone changes through time, right? So why should characters be any different? ~Anyhow, enjoy and don't forget to review!
Word Count: 4,681.
Last edited: 08th of June 2009.
"There is always some madness in love. But there is always some reason in madness."
- Friedrich Nietzche (1844-1956)-
"Just for Tonight"
By: FenixPhoenix (Giselle González)
One-Shot
Elincia Ridell Crimera sat on the edge of her bed. The long awaited night was finally upon her. Hazel eyes framed by long, thick lashes traveled to the balcony. The curtains were neatly tied to the sides, allowing her a view of the bight moon illuminating all that lay on the world below, like a torch held by the Gods amidst the darkness of uncertainty.
The full moon had to be a sign from above, or at least that was what she kept repeating to herself. Today she was Elincia. She liked the sound of it. Just plain Elincia with no titles attached. But tomorrow she would be addressed more often than not as the Queen of Crimera. Perhaps her name would be forgotten, eaten by the title that would always precede it.
She sighed deeply. Her heart was hammering hard inside her ribcage, drumming as a reaction to the idea she was about to act upon. She had never done what she was about to do, never even dreamed of it until now. Still, she could not back down. She 'would' not back down.
Slowly, she stood up and draped the back, velvet cloak around her. She pulled the hood up and adjusted the black mask she'd also don, so that it hid the lower part of her face. She had gone through great trouble getting her attire ready. Black was a color that did not suit her much, but it was perfect for the job. After all, she wanted to move around town without arousing curiosity. It was even better if she managed to blend in with the shadows, melting into that cold embrace that she'd long ceased to fear.
"There is no going back, Elincia," she murmured to herself as she cast one last glance at the mirror reflecting a black-dressed figure that was hard to recognize. "We won't have a second chance, Elincia."
Yes. She needed first to convince that part of her reluctant mind that felt this was a bad idea. It was the part that always hesitated. That always over analyzed everything. It was the part of her that sowed the doubts that perhaps she was in too deep… that perhaps she would not make it… that she was not apt to neither lead nor fight… nor love?
It was the part of her she hated the most but the one she could not destroy.
Her eyes switched to stare at a white door. She knew Lucia was sleeping soundly behind the threshold. She felt even a little guilty at what she was about to do. But what else could she do? Sure, her friend would most probably understand her actions, but would she allow them?
Elincia smiled sadly. No, her friend would stop her, even if it killed her to do it.
I am on my own, she resolved as she stepped out into the balcony, giving her first step towards her temporal freedom. She grimaced when she realized that it was a long way down. Why couldn't the senators place her on one of the lower floors? Of course, the answer was obvious but still…
She sighed as she tied a rope to the rail of the balcony and, slowly, she let the rope unwind downwards. She was glad to see that at least it was long enough to touch the ground. However, Elincia had never in her life climbed down a rope and she wondered if it was as difficult as it looked. With all her heart she hoped it wasn't.
Carefully, she began her struggling descent. Twice she thought she was going to die as her hands slip down the rope at an alarming velocity before she could regain control. When she was safely on the ground, she rubbed her hands forcing the tears that threatened her to remain at bay. Her red hands ached horribly. The rope had definitely burned at least the first layer of skin.
Crouching lower when she heard footsteps nearby, she crawled towards the open embrace of some bushes. She saw two guards walking by and was thankful when she noticed they were so engrossed in their chat that they had not paid attention to the rope hanging from her balcony.
Naturally -though she was glad for it- it also worried her to no end. These men were supposed to be watching out for the safety of their soon-to-be Queen! What if an assassin had used that rope to climb into her room?
No time to think about that! She reminded herself, shaking the mere idea out of her mind. This was not the time to be lost in musings. In an hour, the guards would make their rounds around the palace again. Elincia had to be away before then.
That on her mind, she stole out of the castle grounds and lost herself in the darkness of the roads ahead. She walked in nervous silence down the almost deserted streets. She kept struggling with the annoying part of her that yelled to forget her stupid plan and return to the palace, into the safety of certainty and the hardness of its walls.
Why would she, though?
No. She would not return until after she confronted the issue that had stolen more than one night of sleep. She hated her situation. She hated the fact that, somehow, she had lost the freedom that she had always taken for granted. She had traded, without having a choice, her freedom for a cage made of gold.
Sure, she would be able to save people, to help them. She would be able to make all the wrongs right again. But the price was too much! And yet, how selfish of her to think about herself when so many people were counting on her!
No. Today she would only follow her forbidden desires. For at least this night, she would cling like a dying soul to her hidden selfishness and slipping freedom. More so since in a matter of hours, she would no longer be able to be Elincia.
Her destiny had deemed it necessary that she become something greater than a mere pawn in the world events. Elincia wondered if the concept of 'destiny' was like that one of 'rules'. They said that rules were meant to be broken, so then was destiny meant to be challenged? Was destiny something already written or could we write it however we wish?
Maybe normal people can write it, but you can't, Elincia. Destiny has already been written for you and, though you can still make adjustments, you cannot change it, the voice of her conscience stated, and Elincia, sadly, knew it was true. Change, though sometimes unwelcome, was inevitable. It was a rule of life but not necessarily should it act as the ruler.
She stopped when she finally arrived at the shabby building she had been looking for. It was tavern and an inn, a poor one at that. It was probably the last place where a Princess should be found and yet… she knew 'he' and his group felt like home in it.
Naturally, she had offered to let them stay in the palace, but they had all unanimously turned down her offer. They were not comfortable in the atmosphere of the high society. She felt the same and, if she had had a say in the matter, she would have probably chosen as they did.
She bit her lower lip behind her mask. Her eyes traveled to one of the windows. If the information she had gathered was correct, it was the window of 'his' room. She sighed as she searched for a way to get in there without having to stroll inside the tavern. She did not have to search for long before she found a way.
She would have to climb, but at least his room was on the second floor. Now, the only problem would be if someone were to catch her in such a compromising position. But it was late; she had chosen just the right hour. It was a time when people were either asleep or too drunk to notice a girl climbing a building using the popping rocks as leverage.
Plus, the day was perfect. Tomorrow she was to be coronate, so the majority of the people decided to turn in early so that they could stay up late the next day and enjoy the huge celebration that was bound to spread across the entire realm.
When she reached his window, she was glad to find it open. It was too hot for anyone to be able to sleep with closed windows. Gingerly and nervously, she moved inside. The last she wanted was to scare him by making a loud noise.
Just as her other foot touched down on the floor inside the room, though, she felt arms hitching her from behind. Her first reaction was to try to jerk away, but the arms tightened and she was sure that –if she gave him a reason- he would crack her arms like twigs. So instead, she held very still as his breaths crashed on the skin behind her mask.
"Who are you, thief?" he asked in a cold whisper. The tone was so frigid that she forgot how to speak.
Ike repeated the question, adjusting his grip on her so that one hand was free to pull down her hood. She felt him tense, probably when he took in her green-colored hair. Then, his grip loosened completely.
Elincia closed her eyes, sighed profoundly and turned around. His blue eyes were wide with open surprise. Now, it seemed to be him the one who had forgotten how to talk. Lowering her mask she smiled, feeling incredibly self-conscious.
"What are you doing here, Princess?" he asked truly curious.
The smile on her lips quivered. Yes, 'Princess'. Her name would have sounded just right if it came out of his lips, but he had always called her Princess. Yet, even then he made her feel more like a girl and than a Princess. She loved the feeling of it more than anyone would ever guess.
"Is everything alright, Princess?" he took one step towards her and took her chin in his callous, but nevertheless, warm hand. He tilted her head and she could see his eyes trying to read what was troubling her.
Is everything alright? No, Ike. It is not, she wanted to answer and yet didn't.
He was such a strange man. She had seen him fight with a skill that surpassed even a trained soldier's like Geoffrey. She had seen him lead a group of hard mercenaries as though he had been born to do just that. She had seen him inspire with words the fighting spirit of his men but also quell with words bouts between allies. She had seen the rage in him propelled by the thirst of vengeance whenever he had encountered the Black Knight. And she had seen protectiveness claim him whenever he was near Soren, Mist or any of his soldiers.
And yet, right now she could see innocence in the flesh. His blue eyes were surprised, worried and confused to see her there. He truly had no idea what she was doing there. But how could such a man still be as innocent as a child in some aspects?
"D-do you truly… not know what I am doing here, my lord Ike?" she asked, hoping he had understood what a girl would be doing in the room of a twenty-one year old boy without the need for her to spell it out. She was not sure if her already heated face could take it.
Ike frowned in thought, but she could see he was inevitably lost as to what she meant. Elincia's smile quivered when she remembered words he had said not too long ago. We come from different worlds, Princess… But love could breach worlds just like she had seen it breach races! She had to believe that, else her heart would shimmer right then and there.
"I do not know just how to answer your question, Princess," he confided straightforward with not a trace of shame. "Do you wish to talk about something, perchance?"
Elincia closed her eyes and felt a powerful wave of heat rushing to her cheeks. Oh, the man! To talk? Did he truly believe she had stolen into his room, in the middle of the night, only to exchange trivialities?
But one look at his face showed that it was indeed only that what he was thinking.
"I….I….ah….," she bit her lower lip. Why couldn't he say something else! Why couldn't he make it easier for her to do what she came to do? To offer him what she wanted to offer?
She felt tears forming in her eyes and covered her face with trembling hands. She just wanted to be Elincia! She had never wanted power! No one even asked her if she wanted to inherit an entire country! How would they expect her to rule when she was not even suited for such a role! She had no training in politics or war or even administration! It was so very frustrating…
She felt his arms around her. He embraced her tightly and quietly. He was not even attempting to find the source of her troubles nor was he asking her to stop crying. And she was truly grateful to him for it. She just wanted this. She wanted to let this out of her chest silently. She wanted the tears to take away her pains… at least, for tonight.
"I…I just w-want to be… Elincia, my lord Ike," she confided in a quivering voice as she returned the embrace. She clung to him like a drowning woman because she was downing. She was drowning in a vast sea of fear, doubts, despair and yes, even love.
She placed her head on his chest and she could hear his heart. The sound was like a fast drum and she realized that perhaps he was not as calmed as he seemed. But what was causing the change? Was he worried that someone may find her? Or was there perhaps something else?
Suppose he felt like her…
Elincia gulped and pushed him away lightly. She stared at his soft, blue eyes unblinkingly. She sent the silent message conveyed by her heart hoping he would understand it. He leaned down and kissed her on the mouth tenderly….lovingly.
And she kissed him back. At first she returned the gesture just as softly, as hesistantly. But then the Princess deepened the kiss that, whether it had been planned to be soothing or not, had stir the passion he had long awoken in her.
"Princess…," she could hear the hesitation in his voice even if he was still holding her close.
"J-just Elincia," she whispered stroking his cheek, "Just let me be Elincia, for tonight is my last day. Tomorrow… I shall be a symbol and I will put asleep the feelings that led me here today..."
He said nothing, just stared at her tenderly. She felt him sweeping her off the ground and moving towards the bed where he had been sleeping for days. She smiled for the first time in what seemed to be like weeks and kissed him again. And they let themselves go. They shut out the yelling voices of reason. They cast away thoughts of the future to come and focus instead on the present that was tonight.
And they loved. The loved for the first time and maybe for the last. They loved the person who they wanted the most and the only one who they couldn't hold on to forever. They loved the person that lied beneath the layers of titles without regards of what others may think.
Love is said to be blind and to stroll hand in hand with madness, and Elincia realized for the first time how true the statement was. She loved him to a maddening point. But would it pain her just as much to let him go?
"I-I love you… Ike," she said when they were laying on each others' arms breathing raggedly. She had blurted it before she could stop the words and was very still as she waited for him to say something.
"I love you too, Elincia," he confided, kissing the top of her head and holding her even closer.
She closed her eyes with relief and blissful happiness. She had been right. Her name sounded beautiful on his lips. She would have given everything to stay like that forever, to wake up every day to the smile of his face –or even to his perpetual scowl.
It is almost morning, the voice in her head reminded and broke, with that, the enchantment of the night bringing to her mind the consequences of the morrow. She wriggled carefully out of his arms. She could see pain that mirrored hers in his blue orbs. He did not even attempt to stop her. He knew as much as her what duty she was forced to attend.
"W-would you… take it, Ike?" she asked him, as she silently began to dress herself while he stared at her with eyes filled with love and pain.
She saw his hesitation but she knew he understood the question. She was offering him a title of nobility, something that she knew would get her in trouble with the senators but she didn't care. What did blood mattered when it was the heart that dictated if one was noble or not? The pause, however, stretched and she was about to slip out the window when she heard his answer.
"Yes, Elincia," he answered and she felt his arms embracing her slim frame once more before he let her go. "For you I will…" He stepped back smiling and finished, "I will see you later."
She smiled at him, kissed him one last time and left. She left feeling new and lighter. She left knowing this was not the last time she would see him. She left because maybe, just maybe there was yet hope.
When she arrived at the Palace she saw Lucia sitting on her bed. There were half-moons under her eyes and Elincia felt bad. She had probably spent the night looking for her.
"You bath is ready," was all she said. There was no reprobation in her tone, no anger or worry. Lucia stood up and was about to leave before she asked over her shoulder, "How is General Ike?"
Elincia felt her heart skip a beat. She turned to Lucia but found only a knowing smile in her face that seemed both happy and sad. How should she respond? But before she could begin to struggle for an answer, Lucia was gone.
-o0o-
The coronation took a long time. More than once Elincia had to fight the urge to look at Ike. She could feel his eyes piercing her, but she ignored him. She could not afford to look at him. One look would be all that was needed for her love for him to be written all over her face. No. She could not control her feelings like he did. She could not hide them at all.
She was already staking it all on giving him a title. If the nobles were to discover her feelings for him… all would be lost. But Elincia could also feel another pair of eyes on her. Lucia's eyes switched from her to Ike and back again. Her friend knew and she looked… sad! But why was she sad? Did she like Ike? Or did she think that their parting was inevitable?
No. Elincia was not willing to even think of the possibility that they could never be…
After the coronation days just went by in a blink. She was constantly occupied with senators, meeting, generals, nobles and citizens. She had thought she could have had some alone time with Ike but it had been impossible. Now that she was the Queen, she was more carefully guarded and Ike had troubles of his own.
He was not respected by the other nobles, even after understanding that they owed the life of their Queen and the survival of Crimera to him. No. For the nobles, Ike was no more than a peasant and, every time they could, they made that clear.
When Lucia came to her room one evening, Elincia wondered why she looked so sad. She did not have to wonder for long, though. Silently, Lucia placed Ike's ring on the table. It was the ring she had given him as proof of his noble title.
Elincia felt tears on her eyes even if her reluctant mind dared not admit what that meant. She felt Lucia's arms around her and knew it was real. He had finally left, just like she always knew he would. But she had dreaded it and hoped against it all the same.
"You cannot cage a lion," Lucia said, "They are meant to roam freely and serve no master. That is why they eventually return to their mercenary life."
Elincia hugged her friend back. Lucia had known all along and it was because of that she had always looked so sad. It was not that she liked Ike but that she cared for Elincia and her shimmering heart.
"He loved you all the same," Lucia soothed, "I could see it in his eyes whenever he looked at you."
Elincia closed her eyes tightly. Perhaps she should have let him know every once in a while that she too loved him back by at least looking at him more often.
"You are right, Lucia," Elincia whispered between sobs after a pause. "Only a bird like me can be caged and paraded around. A bird and a lion can love each other but eventually one would eat the other."
Elincia bit her lip hard, drawing blood. She had tried, selfishly, to change Ike. She had tried to transform a powerful lion into a beautiful bird. But she knew better. No. Ike's spirit claimed what she had lost. He claimed his freedom and, in the process, he may have cast his heart aside. But Elincia could not do that. She had already lost her freedom. To lose her heart would be too much.
So instead, Elincia locked her heart away in a place no one could reach it and she gave the key to him and him alone. Only he would be able to breach the lock. Only he would be able to feel her heart again.
She had loved once. That was much more than anyone could say. People could live freely for a lifetime without loving. Elincia at least had tasted love and she did not regret it.
No. Every time she wanted love, she would only need to close her eyes and relive the past. That would have to be enough…
So until the day when he came back –not in dreams but in reality- she would be the Queen of Crimera and would put Elincia and her feelings to sleep…
...FIN...
Story Written by: Giselle González
© Fire Emblem is Property of Intelligent System and distributed by Nintendo.
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