This is a story that I've had in the back of my mind for a while. I always planned not to post it until my other one was finished. However everything fell into place for me with it and I just couldn't resist. The updates to begin with may not be too frequent as my other story has always been my baby and I want to do it true justice but as it is nearing the end hopefully this one will be posted quicker soon enough. It is very different from my other story.

This story is semi of AU. Everything up until the end of Season 4 did happen. However after graduation things played out a little differently. I'm not going to go into specifics as I don't want to give too much away. If you have any questions I will try to answer them but I do love a mystery and I will answer most queries as the story progresses. I'll stop now. Let me know what you think and whether it's worth continuing with.

You Can't Put Your Arms around a Memory

Chapter 1 - Bitter Glass

Twenty four year old Lucas Scott stirred slowly from his peaceful slumber. The quiet darkness that had hung over his home was gradually penetrated by the high pitched wails of his baby girl. It was the third consecutive night that this had happened. Reaching a hand over to his bedside table he pulled the clock radio around to face him. 4:45 glowed back at him.

With a low grunt he pushed back against the sheets and blankets and then swung his legs over the bed. He cast a brief glance at his wife curled on the left side. Her back was towards him. He could tell instinctively that she was awake. Her figure was rigid and her breathing was shallow. He knew by experience now that she was a light sleeper and merely chose to ignore the disturbance.

The chilly edge of a Tree Hill winter was now beginning to set in and Lucas grabbed his robe from the back of the door. He then moved across the hall and into the nursery. Isabelle Scott lay in the crib on her back, her face red from crying and she was presently kicking her legs in discomfort.

"Hey baby," he said softly picking up his beautiful eleven month old daughter and cradling her in his arms. "What's the matter huh?" It was unusual for her to do this now; the nights of disrupted sleep had been a thing of the past. For a good couple of months now she had slept straight through until he came in to get her for her morning feed.

His little girl had quietened a little now as she became aware of his presence. He rubbed his index finger over her chubby cheek.

"That's my girl," he pressed a kiss to the crown of her thin blonde ringlets. Her forehead was warm and clammy to touch and Lucas frowned. He made a mental note to take her to the doctor's surgery first thing tomorrow. He knew he worried too much, his close family and friends joked that he was going to be an overprotective and over bearing father. From the moment Izzy had first come into the world he had known that she was the most precious gift in the world to him. And as soon as his baby had been placed in his arms he knew that their bond would complete him and that he would always adore her. He knew he fussed over her but he could help it.

Lucas moved to the rocking chair and settled them both there. She let her big green eyes settle on him then and smiled. He gave a crooked grin back as he cooed over her. He could always pacify her eventually. His sister-in-law Haley had always proclaimed that he just had that magic touch. It had worked with his nephew Jamie and it seemed to work now for his otherwise inconsolable girl. He sat there rocking the chair back and forth and watching over his child.

In the bedroom Lindsey Scott turned over onto her back. She stared up at the ceiling not being able to get back to sleep since Izzy's crying fit. She tried so hard not to let those awful feelings of emptiness and insecurity back in to occupy her mind. It was useless though and she soon found herself rising from the now cold sheets and crossing the dimly light hallway. She stood in the doorway to the nursery and watched her husband and daughter. Lucas held Izzy so tenderly to his chest as they slept. She inwardly cursed herself as she felt her envy at how flawlessly they fitted together. She herself felt so detached from Isabelle.

She let out a sigh as she brushed back her tangled locks. She sometimes wondered why she couldn't just let go and be happy. She had married the perfect man and they had the child that they always wanted. They lived together as the perfect little family; Lucas was coaching the Tree Hill Ravens and was on the way to having his book published. On the surface everything was perfect.

Lindsey crept quietly downstairs and into the kitchen. She put on a fresh batch of coffee and took the mug of steaming liquid into the lounge. She sat on the couch and drew her legs under herself. Her eyes fell upon her platinum wedding band and she tried to push all her fears aside. They had been so happy as they stood in front of friends and family two years ago. She had won her man.

Her attention turned to their wedding photo to confirm her belief. Sure enough she was that beautiful white gown designed by Brooke Davis. Lucas had his arms wrapped around her and was grinning broadly. She stood up then, forgetting the coffee and crossed to the other side of the room.

What held her eye now caused her brow to wrinkle and her concerned anxiety reached new heights. She held the frame in shaking hands as she stared at the image.

Lindsey had always felt inferior to Peyton Sawyer. She had read through her husband's first book many times. It was that very work of art that had drawn Lindsey to the young author in the first place.

She knew how careful and meticulous his had been as he chose his words to describe his beautiful heroine. As she stared at the pictures that were displayed on their mantel she couldn't deny one simple fact. That no matter how hard she tried to make him happy now and be the perfect wife she could never recapture that smile he had worn throughout High School. The pictures of Lucas at the state championship and the pictures of him with Peyton haunted her every waking moment. He had never looked so happy. The smile was coveted, a secret reserved for a time when Lucas had felt truly alive and content.

He no longer seemed to possess that pure flame within him and Lindsey was haunted by the fact that her husband had loved someone else more. She was forced to admit to herself that she couldn't compete with a memory of perfection and she couldn't compete with Lucas's love for his daughter now.

Lindsey was a prisoner in her own life. She had wanted this. She had made this happen. She had married Lucas. She had asked him for a child and when she couldn't conceive she had made the ultimate sacrifice. Tears stung at her eyes and she sank back onto the couch letting her sorrow take her over.

The brunette in his life now knew she could never match up to the little girl in her husband's arms upstairs now. Nor could she ever compete with the one person she saw staring back at her whenever she looked into little Izzy's green eyes.

A/N - Well I know it was short, kind of like a test shot but drop me a review and let me know whether I should continue. Thanks ;)

Also for anyone following my other story, I've been in a bad place for a week or so and writing the story can be hard for me at times. But I am still on it and it is coming and I plan to have two chapters up next week.