Nya~ -_- I dunno if I like it…

2/8/09, 12-12:40

1,350 words... about...(without the opening and end notes)

None of these characters are mine D: Nor is Eyeshield 21…. And Sena is Shin and Hiruma's (muahahahaaaa~)

Anyway~ I was tired and bored… and really out of it and depressed so my style changed D:

Hope you like it anyway~

Unconscious to the speaker, it had not been the question that had shocked him.

It was the manner in which it was asked, unfortunately, and as is typical in all truisms, a misinterpreted look of utter confusion (maybe even repulsion?) sends one's world crashing down into itself, waves of despair wracking through the body and the only option left is to run.

To run and escape the intolerable pain one feels after throwing caution into the wind and taking a gamble- to run and free one's self from the manacles that had once tapered the now crushed heart. Run and erase the memory and humiliation endured, and to avoid the laughter that would surely follow. Run towards security and protection, so that you may soon begin to reconstruct the shards of a fragile broken heart, tape them together to see if they'll last.

Then, when you have run away, forcing yourself to a point of pure exhaustion, you must settle down in a sanctuary of choice and begin to mend. One must be careful when handling the shattered pieces, and slowly begin to find a way to create some semblance of a heart, so that maybe one day you can find it in this heart to forgive and forget. After all, the problem with falling for someone so close to you, is that even if they let you hit the ground, they're going to try and help you back up, regardless of complaints and arguments against such unwanted attention.

It was no different than what you see on a soap opera, or read in a cheesy, paperback romance novel, except that Prince Charming was not going to come to the rescue, because in reality, Prince Charming was not a prince, nor was he charming. He was spiteful and horrible and he was probably laughing at your idiocy right now and everything was wrong, and you don't understand what you did to deserve this, and you thought that maybe, maybe he might have liked you back, if only a little.

…Or so you tell all your two best friends- the maternal one reaching you almost immediately- who come to your side because that's what friends are there for. But you know, better than anyone, that he is different. He is caring (deep inside, anyway), and funny (in a twisted, demonic sense) and smart (in an evil, conniving way) and he's everything you've always wanted to be.

It's funny and ironic that he's completely encompassed your dreams and you finally realize what you really, truly wanted and he's the first and only one to completely stamp and crush any hope you may have once had.

Empty and lifeless, you subconsciously push your two best (and damn near first) friends away; you see the love they share, despite their joint efforts to conceal it from you. You see the looks that pass between them, the gentle touch when they think you aren't looking, and it makes you sick. You want them gone, because they have what you wanted, and they're inadvertently flaunting it in your face.

Everyone becomes the enemy.

You blatantly ignore your happy mother because you know how in love she is with your father- even if it doesn't show all the time. After all, you're their son, and maybe it was their fault all along, for it is their genes that made you unattractive and unappealing.

…but it doesn't compare to how you treat her. All she managed to say was a cheery Good Morning Sena-kun before you went completely off tangent, and criticized her for her 'foolish feelings' and 'silly beliefs'. You lied and told her you never liked her, and probably never would. You left her crying, but still she smiled weakly at you as you walked away, because she thinks that maybe, just a little, she can understand, because love is the biggest hypocrite of them all.

Leaving your only slightly repaired heart on the floor- a broken, partially solved puzzle- you choose seclusion. Eating alone, living alone, walking to school alone, it only adds to reasons it's your fault after all. You aren't likable, you are repulsive. Nothing was ever about you, it was a sordid twist of fate that for the first time in your short and meaningless life, you managed to make friends, and only shortly after push them away cruelly. You were destined to be alone forever and ever and ever.

Sitting in class, you stare out the window, ignoring the concerned stares you feel piercing your back. Despite your malice towards them all, they still show friendly concern. You feel a small twinge of guilt (possibly regret?) but it pales in comparison to the big, gaping hole he left in you.

You hear their plans that will go unfulfilled to 'get back at him.' And you feel your heart break apart a little more.

You avoid all lunch areas where they can find you, and once again isolate yourself, because you are meant to be alone, (just like before) and there can be no more denying fate. You hear their calls for you, hear the worry laced in their voices.

Trying to escape the constraints of the school proves more difficult when alone. When the other two were here, people would part and let you pass, but you know that it was only because you were with them, and no one properly understood why you were there in the first place, because you never fit in.

The first step outside the building shows you that it's raining, and you grumble and complain about how the world is against you, but no one listens because they just don't care for a loser like you. Clutching your schoolbag to your chest, you make a fast dash down the streets and avenues up to your front door. Noticing that your mother is not at home, nor is anyone else; you breathe a sigh of relief.

You manage to take only a few steps before you slip and fall, landing painfully on your back. Your socks are wet and the floor is apparently too smooth. Carefully sitting up and removing the offending garments, you pretend you don't hear the doorbell ringing or the rolling sounds of thunder in the approaching storm.

Ringing for the umpteenth time, you painfully make your way to the door, because it's obviously important. You expect to see someone grinning stupidly, or your mother smiling in her joyful, carefree way.

What you actually see is him (since when did he use the doorbell?), soaking wet, looking downright pathetic, and still somehow devilish, in his drenched clothes. Your heart clenches at the sight, and you can only manage to stare dumbly at him. He offers a toothy smile and holds out a small tulip out to you, arrogant even in his given state. You move out of the way and invite him in, quickly running to grab a towel to dry his flaxen, drooped locks and hopefully warm him up. He stands in the front hall shivering only minutely and you resist the urge to hug him and instead invite him to sit. He immediately sits on the floor, providing the excuse that he's too wet, and he doesn't feel the need to destroy your house (since when does he worry about destroying anything?).

Casually kneeling in between his spread legs, you laugh stiffly as you place the towel over his head and gently (quickly) towel him off. He gives a sincere smile (gorgeous) and you can't help but return it, shocked at how quickly you seem to have mended. Fear grips you as you realize that you may be too hopeful, and he's not really here for all the reasons you want him to be. Smile lost, you hastily try to retreat. He notices and grips your wrist, pulling you into his soaked chest and nuzzling into the crook of your neck and biting tenderly. You blush furiously and try to pull away, even if it's only to see his face.

"Don't…" He growls.

So you don't pull away.

…and you don't think you will ever again.

Whoa. A second-person (?) story O-o weird... I dun' usually like those

So yeah. Random-ness. I dun' lyke teh ehnd…. I shoulda continued XD But yeh~ that wouldn't fit teh rehst… Oo

Hiru-chan: What's with the over-abusive-ness of the 'h'?

iNz: Don't question my authority! Respect it! ( I can do anthing to you! Anythang, I tells yah!

Hiru-chan: Nuh-uh~

Hiruma moans and writhes under Sena's harsh ministrations and shouts his lover's name, almost choking on it as-

Sena: ::walks in:: What's going o- ::nosebleed:: iNzombiac-chan! Stop! Don't do that! (I'm too uke-ish! I could NEVER pull off seme! Especially on Hiruma!)

iNz: ::looks away:: Keh.