Yes, this is not a 221B, and nor is it a drabble, but I think something needs to be said…

Disclaimer- Everything belongs to Conan Doyle, no matter what some people might say…

The Last Straw

"That is it!" shouted the melodious voice of Sherlock Holmes. I looked up from my seat at the table as my friend stalked in, divested himself of his coat and went over to the mantle to find and light a cigarette. He carried a white sheet of paper, with writing upon it, and shook it, as if he should have liked it to be a person, before flinging it at me. Of course, it being a sheet of paper, it did not reach me, and fluttered merrily down to land on the floor, resting itself on the helps of paper strewn there by Holmes in the last few days.

I sighed, and made my way through the mess to pick up the piece of paper. All the time, Holmes kept up his tirade, his eyes gleaming angrily - for I have never seen him so upset in my life. "I have had it up to here with this idiotic film! I mean, first the woman…then the clothes I would not be seen dead in…then the malodorous wretch playing me…"

"Ah…about the film, is it?"

"It is slander, and libel…if I were not public domain…It is rubbish…"

"Holmes? What are you talking about? As much as I enjoy listening to your ramblings, I would quite like to know the subject of this one…"

"Read it, Watson…"

I did so, and stood there, shocked and horrified for a moment. I looked at Holmes, and he nodded furiously, before I murmured, "Homoerotic?"

"Good Heavens, it will be the ruining of us! What on earth were the writers thinking?"

I was still stunned by what I had read, and had to read it again before saying "But I am - was - married!"

"Well, apparently that makes no difference to the people writing the thing. What does the article term it…a bromance?"

"What on earth is a bromance?"

"I have not the foggiest, my dear Watson."

"So they think…"

"Apparently so. These people obviously have no concept of brotherhood - of friendship!"

"Well…this is a turn up for the book."

"A turn up for the…my dear Watson, how can you be so calm about this? Not only am I performing several breaches of etiquette in this thing, but our relationship…"

"I know, I know. But I think our true fans will see past all this, and stay true to the canon. I have to say, I think some of those fan fiction writers would do a much better job - I personally think Vows Made in Storms or That Whiter Host would make much more entertaining productions."

"Or Brother"

"Or The Addleton Tragedy and the Ancient British Barrow"

Holmes nodded, then smiled, "Or perhaps the Case of the Giant Rat of Sumatra…or the Affair of the Amateur Mendicant Society."

I smiled, "I think Holmes, that the world is not ready…not even the world of Hollywood."

He laughed, then walked over to his desk, picked up an envelope and put something in it. He then addressed it and called for Mrs Hudson to take it to the post office. All the time, I watched him, and waited for the woman to go, before saying, "What was that, Holmes?"

"I sent the director a picture of Jeremy Brett and Edward Hardwicke…to remind him of the standard that he must aspire to."

To those I use as examples - I hope you do not mind! It seems a shame that the scriptwriters have to misuse the canon so when there are so many talented writers here!