Ask Brad Pitt (inspired by a line in Cumulative Effect by celestial1)

"I've had the plague… You don't believe me? Ask Brad Pitt… He'll tell you," That's what Tony always says to people when they require his medical history. Hardly anybody believed him anyway. After all… Who would believe it?

It was another usual day in the Bullpen. Tony was attempting to find new ways to bug McGee and Ziva… McGee and Ziva were bugging Tony by not being bugged and let's just say that Gibbs was getting bugged by all the bugging going on. Tony laughed as he read through some of his emails… He was always getting funnies from agents around the building. Half of them he didn't know.

"Anything planned tonight?" McGee asked Ziva.

"I am reading a book," Ziva answered. "How about you McGee?"

"Thought I'd knock out a couple of chapters," McGee answered without looking up. "Boss?" He asked across the bullpen.

"I'm working on my boat again," Gibbs said.

"I wish Dr Pitt would stop sending me emails," Tony began deleting them all. "He's starting to flood my inbox," he complained. Tony sighed as he leaned back on his chair and thought about suddenly pinging someone.

"Can someone tell me which one is an Anthony DiNozzo?" Tony heard a voice asked. He raised his hand up and pointed downwards to signify that he was there. The voice did sound somewhat familiar but Tony just couldn't place it.

McGee's jaw dropped when he saw the man enter the bullpen. "Are you Anthony DiNozzo?" The voice asked.

"I'm your huckleberry," Tony answered. He'd been waiting to say that for quite awhile now but just wasn't given the opportunity. Tony's jaw dropped as he swung the chair around to face Brad Pitt the actor. "Brad Pitt?" Tony asked dumbfounded.

"Are you Anthony DiNozzo?" Brad Pitt asked.

Tony vigorously nodded. "That I am," he answered.

"I've been trying to email you for days but you haven't responded," Brad Pitt said in an angry tone. After all, his time was extremely important.

"Oh, I thought they were from Brad Pitt," Tony said without thinking.

Brad Pitt sighed angrily. "I'm Brad Pitt!" He shouted.

"No, not you Brad Pitt but the other Brad Pitt. You know one of you should change your names… It could be very confusing," Tony said.

"What other Brad Pitt?" Brad Pitt asked.

"Doctor Brad Pitt," Tony answered with annoyance. "What can I do for you Brad Pitt?" Tony asked.

"I have a real problem Mister DiNozzo," Brad Pitt began. "I keep getting these strange calls from people asking if you've had the plague… Now how the hell would I know you had the plague?" He asked.

"What do you want me to do… Brad?" Tony asked.

"Well did you have the plague?" Brad Pitt asked.

Tony's phone rung and he picked it up. "Why do you want to know?" Tony asked Brad Pitt.

"So I can answer them and not sound like a complete dingbat," Brad Pitt answered.

"Oh, hello," Tony said into the phone in a cheery voice. "Well then you can answer, yes, I had the plague," Tony held the phone out. "Hey you really should take this Brad," he said while containing a smile.

"Hello?" Brad Pitt said into the phone.

Who am I speaking to?

"Brad Pitt," Brad Pitt answered.

Yes I am him.

"Yes you are who?" Brad Pitt asked.

Brad Pitt…

"Yes?" Brad Pitt asked again.

Yes what?

"Yes to Brad Pitt," Brad Pitt was visibly becoming frustrated.

Why are you saying yes to me?

"Because you're saying my name," Brad Pitt huffed.

I didn't say your name… I said my name.

"I didn't say your name… You said mine," Brad Pitt said. "Brad Pitt… B R A D P I double T," he tried spelling it out so the man on the phone could understand it.

Yes, I am him.

"Who?!" Brad Pitt asked.

Brad Pitt!

"WHAT?!" Brad Pitt shouted before dropping the phone on Tony's desk. "I'm leaving, this is too fucked up as it is," he said as he left.

"Now I've really seen everything," Tony said with a shocked expression.

"Who was on the phone Tony?" McGee finally found his ability to speak again.

"Doctor Brad Pitt." Tony answered. "I always had wondered what would happen if the two of them spoke… Now I can stop wondering," he concluded.

A/N: I know it's stupid… But thought I'd share.