Perfecting Yesterday
by himig.
Summary:
[Sequel] Reason for happiness and for sadness – reason for living on. Kino explores a country whose every day are perfect, on expense of something important, yet forgotten.
Author's Note:
This was originally intended to be a whole sequel of the series (a second series). Instead, I will make one-shots of Kino No Tabi. I made this like…three years ago.
Kino's Journey: Perfecting Yesterday
People who remember the pain forget the joys
People who forget the pain remember the joys
And the wound will never heal
So the tears will continue fall
"Ahhh, Kino! I'm so muddy!"
Kino pulled up her goggles. She stepped out of Hermes who had wheels that apparently drove through a muddy path. Kino was going to go to the next country already but Hermes wanted to get clean already. To end his complain, she went through the longer route, spotting a house around the woods here. She walked around, looking through the trunks for the isolated house.
"There's a house here. I'm going to ask if they have water to clean you up," Kino said. She then brought Hermes with her, walking to the house through the path in between the trees.
Coming up to the house, Kino parked Hermes aside for a while, hearing him complain to hurry it up. Kino wordlessly walked up the stairs onto the platform of the house. She knocked on the wooden door, waiting for a response.
The door slowly creaked open. A small gap revealed the owner's eyes peaking. Kino saw bag eyes under the man's blue eyes. Wearily, he asked, "Yes?"
"Excuse me, sir," Kino said politely. "My name is Kino and I'm a traveller." She then gestured to Hermes. "That is Hermes, my partner..." Kino turned back to the landlord. "Could we use your water to clean him up?"
Slowly, appearing less suspicious, the landlord opened the door wider. He was wearing a polo shirt with a loose necktie. It looked tattered as if he wore this for days.
The landlord glanced at Hermes who greeted the landlord cheerfully. He looked at Kino again. "Yes...I wouldn't mind."
"Thank you," Kino said, bowing slightly.
With the landlord's permission, Kino brought Hermes by the courtyard where a well was built. It wouldn't be the first time Kino would use a well for water. She looked down on how deep the well was. Water was abundant. There was almost no need for the bucket at all.
"Hermes, why don't I just dip you inside?"
"That would be mean, Kino," Hermes said. "And I'm not going to float in the well. My engine might not work anymore."
Kino laughed, leaving the well and grabbing the bucket. "It would be easier that way." Kino easily took a bucket of water from the well, bringing it down. She put her coat on the well, rolling her sleeves and taking a rug. With then, she began to clean. "This would take a while," she said. "But it's because you didn't want to bathe in the well."
"You just want the easy way," Hermes replied.
Kino just smiled, cleaning Hermes, constantly dipping the rag and wiping out the dry and wet mud from the tires. The scenario occurred repeatedly for an hour and a half, taking the time now too to repair some minor damages from Hermes and seeing if her Persuaders are okay. As she worked, the landlord peered through the window by the kitchen, pulling the curtains.
"Thank you for your kindness," Kino said to the landlord, finally finishing cleaning up Hermes. They were ready to leave already with her sleeves unrolled and wearing her usual coat.
"No, it was nothing," the landlord whispered audibly. "Kino-chan, did you go through the western route?"
Kino blinked a bit. "Yes," she answered.
"Was it muddy?"
"Yes."
"Did Hermes become muddy because of that path?"
"Yes," Hermes' voice came.
The landlord gazed his eyes down, sighing. "I see."
"..." Kino stared at the landlord, wondering if she should say something, wait for him to say something, or leave right now.
Seems like option two came. "My daughter-in-law had an accident there," he said sadly. "My son loved her so much...he couldn't just accept her death. He left me to find a way to bring her back."
"How long has he been gone?" Kino asked.
"Five weeks," he answered.
"What have you been doing?"
"Nothing," he said, his voice shaking. His eyes suddenly became watery. "As a parent with my wife dead, the only thing I can think of is my son! I can't live on without him. I keep on worrying what would happen to him. I won't even know if he's dead. Who's going to notify me? I don't know where he is!"
Kino didn't answer for a moment as the man sobbed, throwing his hands to cover his face. "He sounds like a traveller," she said. "But in search of something."
The landlord looked up a bit and asked, "What are you searching for, Kino-chan?"
Kino again didn't answer for a moment, gazing blankly at the landlord's dull, melancholy eyes. "I'm not sure," she answered vaguely. Kino brought her goggles down. "I could be travelling to find out what I'm searching for." She looked a bit at the sky. "Or maybe I'm searching for nothing. I'm just doing what I feel like doing today and waiting for tomorrow."
With the vague answer, Kino managed to make the landlord chuckle but there were still sadness in his eyes. "Tomorrow? I feel like yesterday keeps repeating itself. I feel like nothing ever changes anymore. I don't think anything's going to change at all unless my son and his wife are back here. Yesterday just keeps on happening. My tomorrow has been sealed already."
"I see," she said. "Thank you again for your kindness."
With that, Kino rode on Hermes and began starting the engines.
"I gave our family heirloom to my daughter-in-law," the landlord said. "It was an old watch. It's no longer working, but it's antique."
Kino nodded to the landlord, finally setting off.
Halfway in their drive to get back to the road, Hermes said, "Ah, Kino, didn't you find something on my wheel?"
"Ah!" Kino used one hand to grab something from her pocket. "It's a watch." She studied the rusty gold watch, glasses broken.
"Didn't the man say his daughter-in-law has the old watch? Didn't she die on the place where we found it?"
"The man didn't say if his daughter-in-law had it when she died," she answered, simply. "It might be from someone, but the possibility is very high."
"Do you think we should go back and give it to him?" Hermes asked.
Kino got them back to the road again. Onward is to the next country but behind is the muddy path they went through. Looking from left and right, Kino directed Hermes' wheel to the left, back to the muddy path. She then drove her way there while Hermes asked why. After half an hour or so, they stopped. Kino parked Hermes and walked through the muddy path herself.
She looked around. And then, taking the watch out, she threw it back to the mud until it sank there. Kino then went back to Hermes and started the engines.
"Hey, hey, Kino, what did you do?"
"Nothing, Hermes," Kino answered, driving to the next country.
After a while, she started a conversation. "Hermes, if I looked back to the past and turned my back from the future completely, do you think I can still move on to the future, or would I walk in the past?"
"Kino, why are you asking me? If you're saying 'I' then you should ask yourself."
"...what happens, if I can't find one?"
"...well, hmm, I guess you'll have to find one to move on, or you might really be stuck in the past forever."
Kino didn't respond and no conversation sparked until they were able to reach the next country.
The gates groaned as the guards of the country deactivated the lock. Kino was off Hermes already, waiting for the gates to fully open wide. When it did, Kino saw a magnificent sight.
The place was nothing like the high towering skyscrapers cities Kino had visited, but it wasn't either a small country with little population with simple houses and small roads. The country was extremely rich in flowers and lush trees with green leaves that seem to sparkle against the sun that sieve through the leaves. In between the giant trees were houses made out of painted stones. It wasn't like the primitive house. Carving was made smoothly to beautify the houses. Kino's jaw was half-opened, looking at the magnificent houses.
She walked through the road made out of pebbles. The place was like a giant garden.
"Greetings, traveller," a woman with a full body painting walked up to Kino. The woman was wearing a white dress and walking barefooted. Kino wondered if everyone in the country dresses like that.
Kino bowed her head slightly. "I'm Kino, and this is Hermes."
The woman returned the gesture, bowing to Kino slightly, as her black hair falling down her shoulders. "Welcome to our country, Kino, Hermes. Would you like a tour?"
Kino thought for a moment, looking around for a bit. She then replied, "No, this is a very interesting country. I'd rather look around for myself, but could you point out a place where I can stay?"
"How long are you planning to stay?"
"Three day and two nights, the day after tomorrow, in short," she answered.
The woman nodded. "There are no inns in this place, but there is an area where guests like you can stay. You can reach it in the northernmost part from the central."
Kino nodded. An "area" where guests would stay is another thing new for the girl. It would be interesting.
Bowing again slightly with a nod, she walked pass the woman and went on the path, sightseeing.
"It's a very unique country," Hermes commented.
"It is," Kino agreed.
The two finally reached their destination. The area was filled with the usual blossoming flowers and the houses of rocks with appealing colors and carved drawings, letters and symbols. There were tourists and outsiders enjoying their stay in the place. Kino continued walking, seeing a couple enjoying a picnic outside. While watching, she failed to notice someone bumping to her. Either way, the offender, holding a bottle of wine with one hand, looked dizzy from being drunk.
"Excuse me," Kino said to the man apologetically.
The man looked like a homeless with only a torn jacket and tattered jeans. He was dirty yet he looked extremely happy. The homeless was dancing, not even noticing Kino. "I am gonna stay in this country forever! It's perfect!"
The homeless left Kino. Kino watched him go then.
"He must be really drunk," Hermes commented.
Kino didn't make a comment.
Soon, they found an empty house (not room) to settle in. She parked Hermes inside, looking around the place. "Wow...the place is very colourful. It's not big or small and it's very clean and it smells really good and refreshing..." Kino looked at the tables and peeked upstairs. There were carpets and wools on the floor and hanging paintings by the wall. The house was complete with kitchen and a bathroom. The bedroom was upstairs. When Kino visited it, there was a futon to set. She didn't complain. The futon was really soft and it was nice gazing at the ceiling with the beautiful drawings.
After taking out her stuffs, Kino took Hermes out again.
"Kino, isn't there any lock?"
Kino looked at Hermes. "Hermes, there's no door." There were only hanging ropes of beads instead.
"Yea, but what if someone would come in and steal?"
Kino looked around. No one seemed to be bothered by it but her. "I brought with me my important items. If there were things to steal, it would be the country's belongings, not mine, but no one seemed to have stolen anything at all."
"Weird."
Kino then began travelling in the country. The people were extremely kind and generous. Everywhere Kino drove, the smoke Hermes released was always purified with the fragrance of the flowers and the air from the trees. It was very colourful in every direction. Statues were also carved from stone and there were gardens and streams the Kino had never seen. Still, all throughout the exploration, there was something unnatural in this utopia.
"It's so peaceful."
Kino reached an empty area where leaves did not block the sunlight. She looked up at the light. "I don't like it."
"Eh? Why is that, Kino? Compared to other countries, it's very nice here," Hermes said.
"...it's too peaceful. It's not like it's boring either. Maybe if I settled here, I would get bored, but that could be anywhere. Since I just came here, the new things don't bore me but the peacefulness is too unnatural."
"Maybe you're not just used to the peacefulness."
Kino turned back to get back to her resting place. "Mm, maybe."
As she was reaching to her temporary place, things didn't seem to be so peaceful all of a sudden. There were loud noises coming from a house. A crowd formed outside. When Kino had stopped over, seeing what was going on, she's a bit surprised that the crowd was so small.
The homeless she met had a broken bottle of wine at hand and the woman she met earlier on lay on the ground with a pair of shocked eyes with a bleeding head. Her husband was crying for his wife.
"That's for not wanting to tour me in the country!" The homeless roared. "All I asked was a kiss and holding hands you—"
The husband suddenly stood up, eyes still wet with tears and attacked the homeless. Many gasped (though by number, there were only a couple) as the two brawled. There were men who then came in and parted the two. The authorities would probably handle it now, but Kino knew the place was not so peaceful after all.
By dawn, Kino got in to her temporary house. She passed by the weeping woman whose boyfriend doesn't seen to be around anymore. Once she had gotten inside the house, she parked Hermes as usual and dropped down to the carpet, sighing.
"I guess the place isn't as peaceful after all," Hermes said. "No matter how peaceful the place is, as long as they are people living in it, it's never peaceful forever."
Kino closed her eyes for a moment to rest.
That night, the white flowers waved as the wind blew, sparkling spores sprinkled that night.
The next morning, Kino went outside once more to learn more about the place. When she got outside, the weeping woman who was left by her boyfriend looked really happy unlike yesterday. Kino looked around in the house she was in from the streets. She was alone, yet she looked so happy, having a picnic by herself. The woman even waved at her as Kino drove past her.
Back in the streets again, the same unnatural peacefulness returned. Everyone was talking with a smile with gentle voices. It was just like how yesterday was. So peaceful, but maybe like yesterday, the peacefulness would break again. When she drove by the street where the wife has been murdered, the neighbour looked as peaceful. It seemed like no one was even gossiping about it. The people talked as if nothing happened by their neighbour. When Kino stopped in front of the house of the husband who lost his wife, she pulled up her goggles and blinked.
"Huh? Kino, when someone dies, don't people usually come and console? Or have a funeral?"
"Mm," Kino confirmed to Hermes, looking around. No one was indeed around, even visiting the man. Has the couple been a loner, but in this place?
"Can I help you?"
Kino looked around, spotting the spouse with a gentle smile.
"I see, Kino-san's a traveller."
Getting invited to the house of a man who just lost his wife yesterday right in front of his house didn't sound too appealing for Kino. She didn't want to get involved with what happened, especially since no one seemed to approach him but she couldn't say no. Since she was here anyway, she might be the one to console the man in the end and learn a thing or two.
"Yes," Kino said.
"That is a very interesting life," he said. "Won't you like to eat?"
Kino shook her head. "I am fine, thank you. Did you cook these?"
"Ah, yes, a while ago. I always cook, but I seemed to have cooked too much for one person."
Kino didn't say anything for a moment. "Can I ask you a question?"
"Yes?"
"...no, nothing," Kino said, smiling slightly. She then decided to change the topic. "This is a very nice country to live in. I never visited any country like this."
The man nodded. "Indeed. This country is just perfect. Everyday is perfect. Today's going perfect too."
"How long have you been living here?" Kino asked.
"I don't really know, but it must have been a while. I can't really tell. It's hard to tell today from tomorrow, or tomorrow from yesterday because everything's perfect. People never complained about their life because it's perfect already. People don't really care how many days, weeks, or years it has been. Time is still in the minds of the people here. Time doesn't make a change."
"I see," Kino said. She then stood up, bowing slightly. "Thank you, sir for inviting me and sharing your thoughts. I would hate to overstep in your hospitality so I shall leave."
The man shrugged a hand. "No, no, it is perfectly fine. Come back anytime. I enjoyed your company. It's not always I have company."
It was afternoon then when Kino drove around the country again. She stopped by the same spot where the leaves were little and the spot was empty. The light from the sun was so warm as it ray down on the field. Kino noticed something blooming from the ground. It was a huge white flower with glittering spores.
It was dusk already so Kino headed soon to the guest house again. She stopped by the doorstep, about to get in when she noticed a note by the doorstep. She parked Hermes, picking it up and reading.
The letter contained an invite to a dinner. The woman who Kino never really talked to invite her to dinner along with other guests it seemed. Kino thought of the food that could be served so that night, she went to the dinner anyway. When she did, it seemed like she was the only guest.
"Good evening," the woman greeted cheerfully.
"Good evening," she said, bowing slightly. "Did you only invite me tonight?"
She nodded. "We're the only guests in the country already. Yesterday, this place was full and I was going to celebrate but I had to postpone it and now only you remained in my guest list."
"What celebration is it?" Kino asked.
"My anniversary."
"Your anniversary?"
"Mm, two years."
Kino didn't reply. She continued to smile at her, standing by the doorstep. Kino then blinked, surprised to see tears flowing down the eyes of the smiling woman. Kino was about to say something but she remained quiet, stowing her facial expression. The woman shuddered, sobbing yet her face continued to smile at Kino. Her sobbing turned to loud crying until her knees became weak and she fell to her knees.
"Kino, Kino, how was dinner?"
Kino closed the door quietly, taking Hermes and getting back to their house. "It wasn't dinner," Kino said. "It was an anniversary."
When Kino got back, she found something else by the doorstep. Someone, to be exact. It was the homeless that killed the man's wife. The homeless didn't look too well though.
"Are you all right, sir?" Kino asked indifferently.
The homeless stirred. When he looked up to Kino, his eyes were swollen and he had eye bags, which he did not have yesterday. "Who are you?"
"I'm a traveller," Kino answered.
"Who am I?"
"I can't answer that."
The homeless looked at his hands. "What am I? I forgot...white flower." His eyes became wider. "This paradise is filled with toxic." The man stood up, panicking and looking restless. "They're making me forget my whole life to start over. I said my life has been a pain, losing my wife in an accident. I wanted to bring her back. I thought she'd be back when my pain is gone." His voice became an audible whisper, and his eyelids drop. His arms became limp and his blank eyes looked at the sky. "I'm joining her now...so I can be happy." Tears rolled down his eyes. "I can't stand it...starting over. I don't want it. I want it to end."
The man suddenly fell on the ground limply. Kino caught the man, gentling placing him on the ground and checking his pulse.
"...he's dead."
The next day was the last day. Kino started packing but she wasn't going to leave yet. She took Hermes with her, visiting the man who invited her inside his house. Knocking on the door, the smiling man answered.
"Ah, Kino-san! What perfect timing. I just served two plates for breakfast today! Could you please join me?"
Kino agreed, coming inside and like yesterday, sat with him, yet not touching her plate. "Can I ask you a question?"
The man happily ate, nodding. "Ask away, Kino-san."
"When's your anniversary?"
The man looked confused. "Anniversary?"
"With your wife."
"My wife?"
"She greeted me when I came here, and was killed yesterday," Kino added.
The man didn't answer for a moment, bringing his spoon and fork down. Then he smiled again. "I've been living alone my whole life, Kino. No one dies here."
"How about the old ones?"
"Old ones?"
"..." Kino stared at the white flower by the vase on the center of the table. "What flower is that?"
The man looked at the beautiful white flower. "Ah, it's a flower only found in our country. It has special pollens that eased the air we breathe," he explained. "It's very important to us. At night, whenever the wind blows, it makes the weight on our shoulder lighter and our chest free. Then when we look at the day, we thought the day we perfect and we hope tomorrow to be as beautiful.
"...there was a man I met last night," she said. "He looked really sad, but he seemed to forget."
"It would take a while sometime," the man explained. "When the pain is too big and the person is new here, it would take sometime. He was a guest, yes?"
Kino nodded. "You're right."
"How about you? Have you experienced the evening air?"
Kino shook her head. "I don't think so."
The man looked confused. "Huh? You've never experienced any pain?"
"I have."
"Have you forgotten them?"
"No."
"That's strange."
Kino stared fixedly at the white flower. "Maybe it's because..."
The engines roared as Hermes drove out of the country. Kino has packed already and departed by sunset. With her goggles on, she head out for the road again, leaving the country. With her were white flowers from the country.
"So Kino, what country—hey, Kino, we're going the wrong way!"
The two returned to where the sad man had allowed Kino to clean Hermes. When Kino knocked however, no one answered. The door was open though. Entering, she entered the dark house. It wasn't too long when she found someone on the floor. Kino bent down to check even though she knew he was long dead.
When she left, Kino left a white flower behind. Getting back to the road with Hermes, she went back to the muddy path.
"Kino, why are we here again? You'll have to clean me again!" Hermes complained.
Kino parked her and searched for the perfect spot, but when she did, she found company. It was the man who was once a couple with the woman.
The man looked surprise. "Oh, hello...is that from the nearest country?"
Kino looked at the white flower on her hand. "Yes."
"So you came there too." The man's eyes dropped to the ground. "My girlfriend and I went there four days ago. We heard it was like paradise, but no matter where we were, we still fight. I left her there."
"...I see," Kino said, bending down to place the flower on the surface of the mud.
"What's that for?"
"Someone had an accident here," Kino said indifferently as usual. "Her lover tried to find a way to bring her back but he left his father who was depressed now that he has been left alone."
The man smiled sadly. "No matter how peaceful the country was, as long as they are people living in it, it's never peaceful forever. We make each other sad."
"But we also make each other happy," Kino said. "It's not the place that can make us happy, but each other just as we make each other sad." Kino then went over to Hermes, climbing up and making the engines work already.
The man blinked, stuttering, "Then why do we exist?"
Kino pulled down her goggles, answering quietly, "I can't answer that. But you should go back. If you don't, you will become lonely. You can only find happiness from other people."
"But being a traveller..."
Kino didn't reply. "Goodbye," she said and heading off.
After a while as they head to the country, Hermes asked, "So Kino, did you have an answer for that?"
"For what?"
"You said you can only find happiness from other people. Being a traveller, do you become happy from the places you see?"
"Yes," she said. "Because it's the people who make the place happy."
"You mean home?"
Kino smiled.
Maybe it's because...
I've accepted it.
end ...
Author's Notes: May 17, 2011. Here's a list of the characters if you're confused with how they're each linked
CHARACTER LIST:
The Lonely Father - helped Kino clean all the mud from Hermes
The Homeless Man - the man who arrived at the country and killed the Wife; revealed to the Lonely Father's son.
The Lover (does not appear in the story) - the Homeless Man's fiance who died; owns the antique pocket watch; Lonely Father's daughter-in-law
The Husband - man who welcomes Kino at the third day of her stay
The Wife - the woman who greeted Kino at the first day of her stay; killed by the Homeless Man
Boyfriend - appears together with his Girlfriend at first and was seen to be happy, but abandons her; Kino meets him while leaving the country
Girlfriend - was left by her Boyfriend in the country; invited Kino to her "dinner."