Away Laughing on a Shiny Volvo

Georgia and Jas manage to sneak off on a bus in Hamburger-a-gogo-land. Instead of New York City, however… they end up in Forks, Washington. Georgia Nicolson/Twilight crossover; R&R.

A/N: Teehee, I found this on my computer and thought "Oh why not!". Midterms officially are one of God's creations that I don't necessarily agree with, like mosquitoes, geese, and potholes. So… that's why I haven't posted (or finished) stuff in a really long time (last year!) Ciao, and good luck to you fellow erudite students on exams! (: [This is dedicated to anyone who has helped me with my Forensic piece- Forensicators for Life!] By the way, this is written during the book where Georgia and Jas come to America with their families (I believe it's And Then He Ate my Boy-Entrancers if I'm not mistaken?)

Disclaimer: It would be fab to own Georgia Nicolson and Twilight, but sadly I do not.

Saturday July 6

on the bus

10 am

Jas keeps blubbering about how "it was wrong what we did" "maybe this isn't exactly going to New York City" "oh no my mum will ground me and then I can't see Tom again" and such. I've told her to shut up and go to sleep, but she'll just lean on my shoulder, pretending she's dozing off, then launch into freak-out mode.

Her head keeps bobbling around like a bobble-doll. Except with fringe. Fringe that isn't painted on, at least.

"Jas, I'm trying to accomplish just a bit of beauty sleep here, so could you at least shut up and stop using my shoulder as a pillow? You're leaving drooly bits down the sleeve."

"Well do you know for a fact that this is going to New York City? And even if it is, will Masimo even be there?"

"Jas, your spaceship will also be in New York City. I'd seriously consider getting in it."

Still Saturday

The bus keeps rolling

11 am

In front of Jas and I is crazy haired lady. She looks to be about fifty years old and has pink streaked hair. Well, her husband in the seat over has a blue Mohawk.

Across the aisle is a ten year old girl singing something that involves 7 things. She's sung it at least 15 times this morning alone. I was tired of listening to Jas ramble, so I counted the things listed in the song.

There were 11.

Are all Hamburger-a-gogo people mad?

Saturday

Jas is having a nervy spaz

12 pm

"Georgia, did you notice the sign we just passed?"

"Yes, it said "You are now in Utah." So?"

"Do you know where New York City is?"

"Yeah, it's past Utah. The sign says so."

"Utah is in the Western part of Hamburger a gogo land. New York City is on the East Side."

"Don't be silly Jas."

"You failed the geography part on last year's final exam. I passed. How could you not know that New York City is closer to England than Utah?"

"Stupid prat with fringe."

Silence.

"Well, don't you just love a spontaneous chum?" I laughed.

"No not really. Ugh my mum is going to kill me and I'll never be able to see Tom and…"

She gets really annoying when she keeps going on and on and on. I turn to pink haired lady and say, "Excuse me, ma'am, but is this bus headed to New York?"

"No, it's going to Seattle."

"Is that near New York?"

She laughed at me with a stupid, pink-haired lady cackle.

Hamburger-a-gogo people are getting on my last nervy.

12:05

What if she's right? Sacre bleu, quadruple merde.

Why you're supposed to check the bus you're embarking on

5 pm

They let us off (finally!), but now where are we supposed to go? Jas is pacing around in a circle.

Circles, circles, circly circles!

5:10

I began on the circle brigade, though I went the wrong way and collided with Jas. On-lookers laughed, and someone threw a coin at my head.

5:15

What could I buy with a coin that has George Washington's head on it?

Brill am I!

5:45

I suggested that Jas and I sit on top of a random car, then once they reach their destination stumble around and beg them to take us in. Jas set world records for the nerviest spaz and the most nervy spazzes in a day. Eventually, I dragged her to the lot.

I let her choose the car, to be nice, and she chose a Volvo.

Brill I am not.

6:30

Geez, Volvo people are taking forever to get back.

Nope, I'm Brill!

6:31

Volvo person returned. Good timing too- it's dark out. Volvo person however seems extremely pale, like he reflects light off of the lampposts. He's so bloody gorgy that he even puts the Sex God to shame. Not only the Sex God but Masimo! Have I died atop this car and gone to Sex God heaven?

"Nice choice bestie!"

Here we go…

6:32

The shiny Volvo begins moving now. It's getting vair vair hard to stay on.

"You okay there?" Jas looks petrified.

"Not really. EEEEEK!" She flipped over and landed with part of her feet on the windshield.

"Take my hand Jas, take it to live!" I yelled.

I tried to pull her up, but she slid down and pulled me too. Stupid, shiny Volvo. All of a sudden, the car skidded to a stop.

"What the…" the Sex God Hamburgese style said as he came out.

"Jas, act natural," I gritted through my teeth.

"Um… Moo!" She really needs to see a professional. Look at the poor child!

"Moo? Who are you?" SGHS asked her, feeling her forehead with the back of his hand. His gorgy, gorgy hand…

"Moo! Moo! Mooooooo!" I cried.

He felt my forehead, too. I must've been feverish then because his hand was almost ice cold to the touch.

"Where are your parents?" He asked.

"Mmm… Texas!"

"Are you visiting the United States, or do you live here?"

"Oh no we're from Britain, but we came here on holiday but then Georgia here said 'oh let's go sneak out and take a bus to New York City' and I'm all 'no way I! I won't be allowed to see my boyf…er… FRIEND again' but we left a note, snuck out in the wee hours of the AM and got onto a bus but then Georgia here got us on the wrong bus and we have no clue where we are." Jas blubbered on. This would be the part where I bring up the fact that she in fact does have a boyfriend whom she's snogged multiple times, and make fun of her ginormous knickers. But however, I'm a good friend.

And I don't want to look immature in front of SGHS.

"Why don't you guys stay with my family in Forks, Washington until we can get you back to your own family?" SGHS said.

We've gone jelloid as we accepted the invite. I know it's not really smart to take rides from a stranger, but this guy was reliable. And I'm basing this off the fact it has a parking pass for the Forks Hospital on it. But, it was either freeze in the cold, or take a ride from a hot guy. I thought we should live a little.

The name's…

7:00

"I believe I forgot to introduce myself. My name's Carlisle Cullen."

The name itself was created by a choir of Sex Gods.

"I'm Jas!"

"I'm Georgia," I said, rather composed. Composed on the outside but on the inside I was making a silent thank-you to the heavens above for this lovely twist of fate.

What?!

8:00

"Hey, I'm just going to have to park for a moment so I could call my wife and let her know you'll be staying."

Wife? He has a wife?

"Not to be rude or anything, but how old are you?" asked Jas. I groaned as I threw my head into my hands. You don't look a gift sex-god in the mouth, Jas.

"Well, I'm older than you'll ever know," he chuckled.

What the hell was that supposed to mean?

Hamburgese people fascinate me. We should study them instead of lockjaw germs in school.

a/n: Well, I'll continue this one later… after exams. Teehee. Reviews and passing on the word would make a great 15th birthday gift (psssst…. My birthday's February 3!)