This is in response to a fanfic that I read. It's called "51 Things Emmett Cullen Is Not Allowed To Do 2" and it's by the user the indifferent child of earth She's hilarious! Go read her stuff. ^.^

/s/3627291/1/51_Things_Emmett_Cullen_Is_Not_Allowed_To_Do_2

this is the number I got the idea

32. Start yelling the lyrics of Kelly's Txt Message Break Up at Edward randomly, while pretending like Edward really broke up with him and it's not a song.

Enjoy!

The bell rings.

Bella and Edward step out of class when they see Emmett walk towards them with his cell phone in his hand.

"Edward....!" Emmett screams attracting the attention of the students in the hall.

"...what?" Edward grimaced.

"You couldn't do it in person

You had to text message break up?"

Edward stands in confusion staring at Emmett while his hand at Bella waist.

Bella stifles a giggle with her hand. Edward looks down at her puzzled. "What the hell..."

Emmett grabs Edwards arm and swings him around to face him again. He continues to make a scene. Now everyone in the hallway stops to stare at attention. Everyone in the classrooms start to poke their heads out the room doors.

"You fuck up

Oh my god I wanna throw up

You couldn't even spell break right!

B-r-a-k-e?

That's in your car dummy!"

"Emmett what the hell are you talking about..." Edward glares at him, "...and I know what a brake is."

"I'm not gonna take this disgrace

I'll be like mace in you face on myspace

just you wait till you read the shit

on you I'm gonna blog about

You like text so much?

How much you like it now?"

"You have a Myspace..? That's stupid.. Wait.. Emmett, What are you going to put on myspace...?!?" Edward looks at Emmett, he begins to read his mind and sees a scene of Emmett putting up pictures of Edward on myspace in his boxers with a cosmo girl magazine in his hand. Edward beings to panic.

"EMMETT DONT YOU DARE!!"

"You can't text message break up!

after 2 years?

I'll Go Alanis Morissette on You

I'm gonna blog and text and post and hoax.

Podcast your bastard ass from coast to coast."

Emmett looks at everyone crowding around and says,

"My ex bf is a cyber space coward.

and he plays with his asshole in the shower"

"I DO NOT! EMMETT SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

Emmett gives Edward an evil grin and yells, " I'm gonna tell all my girlfriends how the sex was, I'm pissed like president bush would be in a gay parade in Texas, I'm gonna spit until you shit, if you don't like it you can lick my fucking clit.... For once."

As Emmett turns to leave..

"You're never gonna get laid in this town again, you loser!

You're an ass.

Go fuck yourself you piece of shit!"

Edward is fuming but speechless.

Emmett walks into his next class and yells back "You're my ex bf foreva, Dick!"

Edward looks down at Bella who is now rolling around barely breathing in hysterics laughing on the ground.

"Edward... Kelly...Text.. Break up! HAHAHAH... DICK..." Bella manages to get out.

"...it was not that funny Bella" If Edward could blush in embarrassment he would do so now.

Then almost instantly his pained face turns to an evil smirk.

"Hmm... Bella. If anyone asks I went home."

Bella stops laughing to look at Edward walk to his car.

Edward walks away murmuring "maybe.. yes, that's it.. hm.. His tv!" He laughs and speeds off the parking lot in his shinny Volvo.

Bella turns to see Emmett running towards the parking lot to his jeep screaming "NOOOOOOOOoooooOOoOOoOooOOOOOOOOO... I just bought that!!!!!!!"

And races after Edward home.

Bella walks away to her next class still laughing hysterically.

Ok so instead of just doing this one.. I've decided I'm going to make as many fics from her 51 Things Emmett Cullen Is Not Allowed To Do part 1 and 2, and from one that is called 51 Things Emmett Cullen Must Remember.

Then she also has one up about Aro Volturi. I'm not sure if I'll be able to do any of those though. It's much easier to write for Emmett than Aro. But maybe I'll give it a try someday =)