Chapter One

The Animorphs were fighting the Yirks in a library.

"You spelled Yeerks wrong," pointed out Marco to the author.

Oh. Thanks.

Chapter One

The Animorphs were fighting the Yeerks in a library. Rachel roared and leapt forward at a Hork-Bajir.

"Hold on," said Rachel. "I have a bear morph."

I thought you had a lion morph.

"No, that's in the TV show. This is the books." She peered up at the author. "You are K.A., right?"

No. I'm a fanfic writer.

"Oh, a fanfic writer," said Rachel. She gave the other Animorphs the same look that the author gives her friends when she has a substitute teacher.

Jake came over. "What happened? Why did the story stop?"

"She's a fanfic author," said Rachel.

"Oh," said Jake.

Cassie came over, along with Ax and Tobias. "What happened?"

"Let me guess," said Marco, who had just come over. "The Ellimist again?"

"No," said Jake. "The author is having trouble."

"With what?" asked Tobias. "I thought the author was supposed to be all-powerful."

I am supposed to be. Rachel keeps giving me trouble.

"Oh yeah, blame me for everything," Rachel grumbled.

"Do you have a copyright?" Ax asked.

I don't need a copyright. I'm a fanfic writer.

"If you don't have a copyright, we don't need to be in your story," Cassie said. She jogged off. "Tell me when K.A. comes back."

"Yeah," said Tobias. He flew off.

I'm starting this fanfic over.

Chapter One

The Animorphs were fighting the Yeerks in a library. Jake roared at a Hork-Bajir and leapt forward. He landed in a large hole.

"Hey!" yelled Jake. He glared up at the author. "What was that?"

Marco peered down at him. "I think that's a plot hole."

"A plot hole?"

"Yeah."

Cassie came over. "Again?"

"Jake fell into a plot hole," Marco explained. Cassie rushed over. "Jake! Are you okay?" A look of realization slowly appeared on her face, and she backed off. "Uh-oh. This isn't going to be one of those sappy romantic stories, is it?"

No. I don't write those.

"Well, good." Cassie looked around. "Where's everybody else, and how come the story stopped again?"

Whoops. I forgot to write them in.

Rachel, Tobias, and Ax came up.

"Let me guess," said Rachel. "Jake fell into a plot hole."

"Yup," said Marco.

"So what do we do now?" asked Tobias.

"Don't ask me," said Jake.

"You'll have to start the story over, and explain exactly what we're doing in a library," said Ax. He looked around confusedly. "Why did I just say that?"

Because I haven't given you a speaking part yet.

"Well, start the story over anyway," said Rachel.

Chapter One

"You'll never get this story finished at this rate," said Rachel.

Be quiet! I'm trying to watch Star Trek.

"That's exactly what I mean," said Rachel. "If you keep watching Star Trek all the time, you'll never get this story done."

"You're watching Star Trek?" Jake asked, coming over. "Cool. That's Voyager, right?"

Yes. Hey, maybe I'll do a crossover. What do you think?

"A crossover? Do we have to?" complained Cassie. "I hate those."

"Which episode is this?" Jake asked, ignoring Cassie.

It's the one where the Voyager crashes, and only Chakotay and Harry Kim are alive. They come back, and send new corrections through a Borg temporal transmitter.

"I think I've seen this one," said Jake. "Which part is it up to?"

Seven's just getting the first new set of corrections.

"Star Trek? Cool," said Marco, coming over. He watched for a while.

Ax came over. "That show is behind technologically by about two thousand Earth years," he said. "Look at the works of the transporter beam. It's-"

Ax, be quiet. We don't need to know about the technological shortcomings of Star Trek.

Tobias flew over. "Is this story going to start anytime soon?"

Let me turn off the TV, and I'll get to work.

Chapter One

"Now what's the problem?" asked Rachel testily.

I can't figure out how to start the story.

"Just start it the way K.A. does," suggested Cassie. "With someone's name."

But it's supposed to be in third person.

"Well, who's the third person here?" said Marco.. "Let's see. Jake was the first, I think. Rachel was the second…Okay, Tobias is the third person here."

"Not that kind of third person, doofus," said Rachel. "In the third person. Saying they or she or he, instead of I."

"You can't do that!" exclaimed Jake. "All the book, the TV show, and even most of the fanfics are in first person."

Most of the fanfics. Mine is different.

"Do it anyway," suggested Tobias.

Nah. Maybe I'll bring in the Ellimist.

"I do not think that is a good idea," said Ax. "One omnipotent being in this story is enough."

"In case you haven't noticed, the author isn't exactly omnipotent," said Rachel.

"Neither is the Ellimist."

I think I'll just do a crossover.

"NO!" yelled everyone at once.

Well, I can't exactly do a regular story. Not with you guys.

"So do a weird story," said Rachel. "Like, an absurdist story."

Good idea.

"A what?" said Marco.

An absurdist story is…well, this.

"Great," said Cassie. "Then you already have a story. Just put this up on the Fanfic Network."

That's not a good idea. I already have low enough ratings. I don't need guys named "Meeko" or "Hellcop" flaming me.

"Well, you better put something up," said Tobias. "I don't know about you guys, but I'm tired." He flew out of the story.

"I'm going," said Rachel. She walked out.

"See ya," said Cassie. She jogged out.

"Gotta go," said Jake. He ambled out.

"Wait for me!" yelled Marco. He ran out.

Ax, you're the only one left. Are you going to leave, too? Or are you going to help me write this story?

"I am going, too," said Ax. He walked out.

Great. So much for character loyalty. Well, I better get back to my homework.

The author got up and turned off the computer.