Extra Onions

Author: The Humbug

Disclaimer: "Kim Possible" and all characters within © The Walt Disney Company and its related entities. Kim Possible created by Mark McCorkle & Bob Schooley. All rights reserved. No profit is being collected from the fiction contained within. The rest you can blame on me.

Rating: PG-13 for threats of combat violence and intimations of a physical relationship and intimate contact between consenting adult females, as well as one teenage pregnancy. This should also cover a little harsh language now and then. If this will offend you, please read something else and then seek some professional help.

Summary: This is a Kim/Shego pairing fan fiction set in my 'Who's Writing This Crap?' storyline. Kasy Ann and Sheki Go Possible are the creations of NoDrogs. This story was written for Evilcs and is posted with her permission; it was inspired by her and is her award for having captured a screenshot of my Deviant Art page at an amazing 15K page views! Congratulations!

Extra Onions / One

She froze and waited for the three uniformed men to finish their circuit around the rear utility access of the building. It was well after three o'clock in the morning and not even the garbage collectors prowled this part of the property this time of night… or morning, as the case may be. She saw one squad; there were three agents to a squad and nine squads patrolling the perimeter of the structure tonight. Each agent was alert, well trained and keenly focused… but her heart was guiding her and no barrier would stand in her way.

"No one without a pass, right?"

Agent One was a huge bruiser of a man, as were his compatriots. They were armed with the latest in neutralizing technology and were thoroughly familiar with the capability of their weapons. The shadowy form remained stock still beneath the support struts of a ventilator fan housing and waited for them to pass.

"Pass and visual confirmation of ID."

"What about clones?"

"Piece of cake. They'll register on the bio-scanner."

"Synthodrones?"

"Same difference. Anything that displays an unbalanced biorhythm or dissonant synergy will set the cherry's ringing and 'zap'." Agent Three took careful aim at a parked car and mimed pulling the trigger. "They either pass out or leak goo everywhere."

"What about… her?"

She didn't dare to breath.

"The green bitch?" Agent Two sighed. "Yeah, she can enter."

"Doesn't seem right."

"Doesn't matter."

"Possible's just a frelling kid."

"Doesn't matter. We've got word from Du to let the subject enter."

"Where's the justice, huh?" The man paused beside the ventilator unit; she could have reached out and touched his ankle. "The kid busts her ass day in, day out for 'GJ', no pay and no bennies 'cept for the occasional bounty reward deposited in her trust account for when she's of age and what happens? THIS happens! And who's responsible? Only THE most-wanted target in our files!"

"Secondary, if you ask me. The blue guy's a dork."

"Major dork."

"The bitch is the one to watch out for. She does everything for him."

"Bigger threat, if you ask me. Anyway… the kid didn't deserve what happened to her."

Agent Two shook his head.

"No, she didn't. But we have our orders and orders are that we keep everyone out of the place except those that can present valid identifications AND visual confirmation of same AND that includes the green bitch." He raised a massive hand to quash any questions. "And no, I don't know why. Not my business or yours. She's got a 'Get Out Of Jail Free' card as far as Dr. Director's concerned and that's all we need to know."

"Hey… either of you smell onions?"

She might as well have been a statue.

"Maybe. Or you got me thinking I smell onions 'cause I'm hungry. Let's call in a report and move on."

The woman risked a breath but didn't move. Even her eyes were locked open. The men grumbled and two of them kept watch as one called central command to check in; they moved off in their original direction as soon as Agent Two closed his communicator. They turned back briefly after just a few yards when, without warning, the ventilator unit coughed to life and began to pump fresh air though the hospital's ductwork.

That might have seemed a perfect chance to move, under the cover of the noise, but she stayed where she was hidden until the agents were well out of sight. Then, silently and careful not to drop her package, Shego entered Middleton General Hospital.

88888888

Kim Possible lay in her bed and fought back tears in the darkness of her hospital room. The voice in her head was particularly mean tonight.

You can do anything… except this. Anything's possible for a Possible… especially epic failure. It will all be over soon… your hopes, your dreams, your future.

She shivered and clutched at her pillow and wished for someone to talk to, anyone.

No. Not just anyone, someone in particular, someone special.

The door swung open.

"Miss Possible?"

A tall figure walked in from the darkened hallway. Kim wasn't inclined to respond immediately and with the lights outside kept dim for the late hour, all she could see of her visitor was that he was tall, wearing the ubiquitous scrubs and white coat of a doctor…

"Miss Possible? Are you awake?"

… and that he was apparently a she. Kim didn't recognize the figure because the head was covered with a tight cap and a surgical mask hid the face. The one thing she was certain of was that it wasn't her mother. Her mom, lauded brain surgeon in residence at Middleton General, was supposed to be in the waiting room with any other family members sitting their shift until the moment when she might need them.

Kim still felt as alone as if she were stranded on a desert island. She sighed and turned towards the door.

"I'm awake."

"Good." The figure walked in and carefully closed the door. The voice was muffled and the tired redhead had to strain to hear it.

"Time for your medicine."

"What medicine?"

The mysterious visitor didn't speak, instead she lifted a paper sack and moved closer to the resting patient, setting the bag down on the tray table that was sitting at the foot of the high-tech bed.

"Wait…" Kim frowned and pushed away any remnants of sleep from her brain. She'd taken all the medicine that she was due that night; the nurse had just been in to see her less than an hour ago. She tried to shift on the bed but wasn't able to move like she wanted to, as well as she used to. The young hero felt helpless and infirm, crippled, useless.

She smelled onions.

"Sh-Shego?"

The figure pulled down the surgical mask and exposed a pale green face. The black glossed lips parted in a wide grin.

"Hey, Pumpkin! Miss me?"

"Oh, Shego!" Kim heaved herself up on the bed and the tall woman had no choice but to quickly move next to the bed and hold the young woman, readily with affection but also to keep her from potentially hurting herself. Kim just let the long arms enfold her while she hung on for dear life and sobbed into the white coat.

"Shego… Shego… Shego…!"

"Princess? Hey, hey, I'm here. It's ok!" The former thief was a little worried at how her angel was acting. Sure, her Kimmie had steadily grown more and more agitated over the last few days but now the redhead was practically in hysterics. She leaned over the shape on the bed and let the teenager weep hot tears into her borrowed outfit, gently stroking the girl's hair and whispering soft words into her ears.

"I'm here, don't worry. You can stop crying."

"Don't go away anymore! Please don't!"

"I won't. I promise, just please stop crying!"

"Shego…!"

"… please stop crying…"

"… I love you…"

"I love you, too."

Those words were spoken with such conviction that Kim felt a little of her old strength return. She lifted her head away and wiped the dampness from her eyes with the back of her hand and looked up at the anxious face of the older woman. She mustered a slight grin.

"Just me?"

The woman rolled her eyes and smirked; a gloved hand reached out and tenderly caressed the large mound of Kim's pregnant belly, covered but impossible to hide beneath the plain deal sheet and flimsy medical gown.

"No, doofus! I love you and this miracle that you're carrying." She slid her eyes to the sack on the rolling tray table. "Now are you going to eat that burger, or am I?"

88888888

"Izzus reeree uwb!"

Shego grinned as she looked back over her shoulder to the bed. The tall woman had long since slipped out of the scrubs and coat, revealing her black and green uniform and her flowing mass of black hair fell to the small of her back now that the cap had been tossed aside.

"Chew, swallow and repeat, please." She returned her attention to the darkened hallway beyond the barely open door. Kim used a handful of napkins to clean the sauce from her chin and obeyed.

"I said that this is really good. Thanks for bringing it."

"Your wish is my command, Kimmie."

"Did they give you any trouble at the nurses' station?"

"Nah."

"You mean they just let you walk in with this?" Kim brandished the burger but didn't let go.

"Hell, no. I snuck in."

"You've got permission to visit! I made Mom and Dad promise me that…"

"I know you did, angel. Relax. But they hate me for…" she scowled briefly and resumed. "Let's just say that I'm not big favorite around here and leave it at that." The woman cocked her chin at the massive sandwich. "Plus, your mother would kill me for bringing that to you."

"It's delicious!"

"Glad you like. I 'spose hospital food was getting monotonous?"

"I can't believe that they can legally serve that stuff to sick people." The redhead eyed the triple-decker hamburger, slathered with cheese, onions and barbeque sauce in a way that only a shark would appreciate. She prepared for another bite.

"If one more person offers me ice chips, they'll get a frosty enema."

"Wow." Shego stood up a little straighter. "You're starting to sound like me."

"I've been so hungry!"

"Well, you don't seem to be losing any weight." The pale green woman smirked to herself and moved away from the door. She was about to say more when she noticed that Kim's face had compressed into a crumpled frown and that tears were running freely from her eyes.

"What? Kimmie, what?!" The girl was hunched forward over her burger, silent except for ragged breathing. "Is it a contraction? Do you want me to call a nurse?"

Kim screwed her eyes shut against the tears.

"I'm so FAT!"

Great, thought Shego, here we go again.

Slowly and calmly, the former thief took the hamburger from the teenager's grasp and set it on the tray table, also using several of the remaining napkins to wipe the blotchy red face clean. She sat perched on the edge of the bed and held the girl, rocking the smaller body back and forth as if Kim were an infant, and not the expectant mother of one.

"Kimmie, you know I didn't mean anything by that."

"I KNOW!"

"Then why are you crying?" She kissed the girl's cheek.

"BECAUSE I'M FAT AND UGLY AND…"

"Indoor voice, baby, before you wake the whole floor."

"… and you've been so great to me and I don't deserve it!"

"Kim, look at me."

She received no answer; the young hero actually pulled away from the embrace but Shego wouldn't let her go.

"I said look at me, Possible."

Just as before, Kim gained strength from the power from voice of the woman holding her and it gave her the will to raise her eyes. Shego kept her expression firm but not too hard.

"We've been over this how many times?"

"…"

"Kim?"

"… several…"

"Are you going to make me give you the lecture again?"

"No." Kim forced down the lump in her throat and sniffled; she was determined to marshal her resolve and stop freaking out, but it took everything she had. "I'm sorry. Really, I am sorry, but Shego… Shego, sometimes I think I'm losing my mind!"

Truth be told, Kimberly Ann Possible wasn't exactly at her best right now; nine months pregnant and three days overdue, in fact, unable to bathe or shower and having been confined to complete bed rest for almost a week with nothing good to eat and finding it almost impossible to sleep… the girl was quite frazzled, to say the least. The older woman nodded and gave the redhead a gentle shove and Kim scooted over as best she was able, making more room on the bed for both of them to sit.

"Kimmie, what you are is hormonal. You're tired and stressed and your body is a battleground of every sensation and emotion that it's capable of. You have nothing to be sorry for." She gritted her teeth. "If anyone has reason to be sorry, it's…"

"No! No! You had no idea what Drakken was going to do!" Kim reached for Shego's arm even as her other hand unconsciously went to her belly. "I don't hold you responsible."

"Your family does. Global Justice does." It wasn't an accusation.

"I'm working on them." Gone was the frightened girl from a minute ago; her voice was calm and reasonable. "How many times have we been over THAT?"

"…"

"Shego?"

"… several…"

"And?"

"And you can be a real pain in my ass." Without asking, Shego leaned over for a kiss; without considering, Kim gave her one. It was several minutes before the tall woman broke the silence.

"You gonna finish that…"

"Heck, yes! Gimme!" The girl gave a mock growl and bared her teeth. She ripped into the burger and a blend of fresh grease and sauce dripped down her chin and onto the flower print gown.

"Kimmie! Geez!" Shego grabbed for napkins and mopped up the mess as best she could. "I'm not shitting you! Your mom will kill me if she finds out!"

"Zho motta dahma."

"I can guess that that means." The pale green woman sighed and glanced back to the door and then the clock mounted up high near the television on the wall. It would be over an hour until the next nurse would swing by to check on their favorite patient and Shego relished every second she had alone with her Princess. Neither of them could explain how they had shifted from enemies to friends to so very much more in a matter of a few weeks. It made so little sense.

Not to mention how they were slowly becoming tentative lovers. Even when the little goody-goody cheerleader started to reciprocate Shego's amorous advances… shocking the Hell out of Shego, that's for sure… it had to be pure madness that they would be drawn to each other so strongly.

Her emerald eyes fell on the protruding bulge of Kim's stomach.

Surely it was more than the pregnancy, right?

Maybe it was because they were more alike than unlike. Kim seemed to think so. The memory of their last days together made her smile; it was before Kim's family convinced her to admit herself into the hospital because her due date was nigh. She waited until the girl finished her hamburger and helped to collect what little evidence was left behind.

"I want to go home!" They each knew exactly which 'home' Kim was referring to and it gave them a warm feeling.

"I miss you 'round the apartment."

"Oh, baby, I miss you, too." Kim practically moaned with frustration. "I really don't like being cooped up like this." She noticed Shego giving her a veiled glance. "Don't worry, I'm all done bugging, it's just that I'm to used to being active." She tugged playfully at the flowing mass of black hair.

"Like you."

"You keep that up, Possible, and I'll induce labor."

"I wish!" The girl rested both hands on her belly. "Geez, I'm huge."

"Don't you mean fat?"

"So not! This is baby, right here." She poked herself. "A very large baby." She sighed. "A whole lotta baby. Nuts, I'm probably gonna split right in two."

Shego bit her lip.

"Can I see it?"

"Yeah, sure." The otherwise petite girl blushed and pulled up the hem of her gown until the pale dome of her swollen abdomen was exposed. Fine hairs were almost invisible in the fluorescent lighting of the hospital room and there was a dark line that ran from the elastic of Kim's panties to her navel. Thousands of goose bumps rose in protest against the open air but that was nothing compared to the rosy stretch marks that laced the drum tight skin. Her bellybutton had long since inverted and it sat proudly atop the larger mound of the young woman's belly, a hill at the top of a mountain. For such a petite and slender girl, Kim's pregnancy was proving to be rather large.

"Damn."

"No kidding."

"Kimmie, I… hang on." Shego sat up and leaned forward.

"What?"

"Just hang on." She fiddled with the trash from the hamburger and Kim heard the wrapper rustling in those pale green hands. "There's something that I just got to do and if I don't do it now, I'll never have another chance."

"Well, ok." Kim was puzzled but patient and in the next moment the pale green woman sat back on the bed next to her. She didn't settle all the way back, however. Shego had her hand poised over Kim's stomach and the tip of her index finger was red and the pregnant hero watched in amazement as the former villain and arguably the deadliest woman in the world traced a smear of barbeque sauce across the taut pink flesh.

"Uh… what are you…?"

Shego slowly licked the sauce away; Kim's breath caught in her throat and her eyes glazed over slightly. When the sauce was all gone, the older woman blew across Kim's gravidity until the last traces of moisture had disappeared.

"Consider this a preview of coming attractions."

"… mmmmm… I'll, um… I'll hold you to that." Kim used an errant napkin to wipe some beads of sweat from her brow and they both settled back into the pillows.

Kim turned to Shego.

"I do love you."

"I know." Pale green fingers intertwined with pink ones. Kim smiled but shook her head.

"No. I… I mean that I…" The redhead stroked the long arm and Shego could feel the strength of that slender hand. "I really love you."

"And I mean, really, I know. You've told me. Hell, girl, you've shown me!" They shared a grin. "And after you've had enough time to recover, I'll get to return the favor."

"But… our life won't be the same."

Shego sighed.

"No, it won't."

"So much responsibility."

"No shit."

The girl turned her head on the pillow.

"Scared?"

"No. You?"

"No."

"Do we have… either of us… any concept of what this is going to be like?"

"It'll be good."

"Are you asking me or telling me?"

"I'm telling you that it will be just fine."

Shego felt an uncharacteristic pang of fear.

"I'll hold you to that."

88888888

The next several hours were a whirlwind of activity. Kim's water broke before dawn and she had the unenviable task of keeping Shego calm… the older woman was ready to pull the fire alarm and call 9-1-1 even though Kim was already in the hospital… and shoo the woman out of the room so that they wouldn't both get busted. The hours of labor and contractions that followed were further enhanced by a burning indigestion that Kim believed would melt her from the inside out.

Dr. Anne Possible smelled the onions from the burger and would have skinned her own daughter alive, imminent birth or no imminent birth, if Dr. John Possible hadn't urged the surgeon to calm down. Shego used the crawlspace above the drop-ceiling panels to make her way clear from the maternity ward to unexpectedly 'appear' in the front lobby just in time for the delivery. She endured a gauntlet of hateful stares as she made her way back up to the delivery room to be with the woman she loved at the time of her greatest need.

Half of the Global Justice agents looked ready to pull their side arms. Mrs. Dr. P kept sniffing the air of Shego's passing and looked none too pleased. Mr. Dr. P seemed to be the last bastion of sanity and focused solely on the welfare of his daughter and the buffoon… Ron, she forced herself to remember for Kimmie's benefit… simply stayed out of sight when she came near.

The mole rat blatantly flipped her off. Little pink son of a bitch!

Kimberly Ann Possible delivered a healthy set of twins in the presence of her lifelong friend Ronald Stoppable and also Sheila Gordon, her partner and lover of several months and the unwilling contributor of half of the babies' genetic material. The attending physician was her mother Dr. Anne Possible, who had the immense pleasure of both witnessing and assisting her own daughter in the birth of her children, but also having been the ONLY family member to know that Kim had been carrying twins.

The sight of her Princess so vulnerable and in such pain pierced the heart of the barely-reformed villain. This young girl had been her greatest threat and competition for three years before Drakken's half-assed scheme resulted in Kim's impregnation; even during the pregnancy, Kim's strength of will and body had kept her going with an energy that stunned her friends and family. Hell, she even managed to crush Stoppable's hand in the delivery room. But seeing the young woman panting and gasping on that table, medication or not, was something that Shego never wanted to see again.

Kim was given roughly two minutes to hold the babies before they were hustled out of the delivery room for some tests. Their pale green skin wasn't totally unexpected due to Shego's altered genetics but everyone was desperate to make absolutely certain that they suffered no ill effects from their hybrid nature. The combination of exhaustion and pain medication left the new mother too addled to do much more than name the newborns as agreed upon… Kasy Ann and Sheki Go… and to declare them beautiful.

The redhead was cleaned up and carefully tended to and allowed to sleep as soon as her own health was assured, and Shego was able to make it as far as the waiting room before fainting dead away.

To Be Continued…