Oh snap! Is that a ghost? No! Sheath your silver weapons, it's the one and only Jessica Malatori, back from her first semester of college. And guess what? She has a nice little morbid snack for all her readers. Oh yes. I so went there. Enjoy this piece about that notorious Horse eating Orc Snak gra-Bura. If anyone is wondering, she is still working on the first chapter of "A Heist of Honor" and is still brainstorming the next chapter of "A Crimson Conspiracy". Oh, and if one was curious, this DOES take place in the Crimson Conspiracy Universe also. Fun stuff eh? Har har.
Horse—it's what's for Dinner
Part One
The sun settled in the hills behind her as the Argonian lass Dar-Ma approached the gray walls of the Imperial City as they towered over the countryside. Blossom, her beloved steed, pushed forward along the winding road that finally began to flatten out. Dar-Ma could tell that Blossom was exhausted. The ride from Chorrol to the Imperial city had her been quite stressful for the two. Not only had it rained along the way, but a pair of bandits had tried to hold them up. Blossom had spent all her energy on fleeing away from them.
Mother would not be pleased. It was miracle that Seed-Neeus let her go on another errand after what happened in Hackdirt. Never again was she going to deal with crazies like that! She told her mother that it was time to grow up; to let go of her little hatchling and let her do more again. So Mother told her to go the Market District to pick up a few exotic things. Someone apparently had special-ordered something that Seed-Neeus needed yet was too lazy to get them all the way in the Imperial City.
She didn't care. Being out of the house was enough for her. Maybe she might run into a charming Argonian man during her stay. That would be nice. The thought made her giggle as she reined Blossom into the stable sitting outside the Imperial City's walls. The sun had almost dissolved in the sky now. Dar-Ma needed to hurry. After that night in Hackdirt, being outside alone always gave her the creeps.
A female Imperial with a torch approached Dar-Ma and Blossom as the Argonian dismounted her. Dar-Ma waved at the Imperial, a rather reptilian smile on her face.
"Hello ma'am. My horse Blossom needs to stay the night…"
The Imperial frowned and took Blossom's reigns from Dar-Ma. "Of course," she paused as Dar-Ma rubbed Blossom's muzzle affectionately, resulting in a satisfied snort from the beast. "Though, ma'am have you heard the rumors about this place?" the Imperial said with a bit of quieted alarm.
Dar-Ma looked over at the Imperial, cocking her head in curiosity. "What?"
The Imperial gave her a half-smile. "Oh nothing. Don't worry your little head over it. Blossom will be just fine. Snak gra-Bara says she's on a diet after all," she mumbled her last sentence.
Dar-Ma didn't quite catch the last sentence, but she thought nothing of it as she thanked the Imperial and headed on her way into the Imperial City to find a place to stay.
As Cyrodiil slept, the proprietor of the Chestnut Handy Stables snuck out in the night. Her two ostlers were sound asleep as well, all too convinced by the lies that she had gone on a diet.
Horse flesh was just something too irresistible to her kind. An addiction perhaps, but that was the reward for running a stable. There was a constant supply of horse flesh, and if one went missing, well there was always the universal alibi-- that bandits stole one away.
As her eyes adjusted to the dark while she snuck into the pen where a few horses stood snoozing away. Each one she examined with care. That old nag of hers-- too stringy and old. That handsome bay horse-- to be saved for when company was over. Snak was craving a tasty morsel, something fat and juicy that would make for a great stew and also go great with a side of bread. And her eyes did find the horse she craved. Under the overhang of the stable slumbered a rather plump paint horse. Probably spoiled with sugar cubes and a great many other fattening treats.
Already the saliva began to form within her mouth as her mind trolled over the various recipes she had perfected over the years. Stew did the meat justice, but nothing was better than the sheer ecstasy of ripping the flesh right off the bone and eating it raw, the blood still surging outwards to escape. She could taste it now...
Quietly she snuck closer, looking over her shoulder to see if anyone lingered around. Assured that the coast was clear, Snak made her way over to the front of the horse. Oh yes, the horse was a fine culinary example indeed. The fat would insure for an excellent roast over an open pit, globules of fat just dripping into a crackling fire.
For a moment, her senses were overwhelmed by her thoughts of the delicacy before her. What was good about paint horses was the fact that they were slow, often plump, and very, very naive. It made for good prey, and a good dinner.
The orc smiled widely, overly excited about her soon-to-be dinner. From out of her breeches she pulled out an old dagger, polished and clean for just the occasion. A swift cut meant a quick death, less blood, and relaxed meat. As she was about to make her move, her foot snapped on a crunchy piece of lettuce. The painted horse opened her eyes as her tall ears picked up the sound. The horse's eyes widened in fright as all she saw was an orc, knife in hand, licking her lips in a toothy grin.
Items packaged and in hand, Dar-Ma hummed contently to herself as the gates to the Imperial city closed behind her. Not only did she find what Mother needed, but she also bought a little extra something for herself. The only thing she didn't find was that charming Argonian lad. It didn't matter; she'd find him eventually. All she was thinking about now was getting home. Oh and of course giving Blossom the bag full of sugar cubes she had gotten her.
Expecting to see a giddy Blossom grazing in the pen, her eyes befell no Blossom at all. A surge of motherly worry went through her as she dropped her things and looked for one of the ostlers but found none. Afraid for Blossom, she charged into the proprietor's building. There she found an Orc woman munching happily away on something.
"Ma'am! Ma'am," Dar-Ma yelped, "My horse Blossom is missing."
The orc looked up at the frightened Argonian who had entered her shack. "Blossom?" she snickered lightly at the name of her lunch, "I'm sorry to inform you but, bandits made off with your horse last night."
Dar-Ma's eyes sunk, tears forming. "But, what would they want with Blossom?" she whimpered.
"I don't know," Snak burped mid-sentence, "I've already informed the guard, so I'm sure they'll contact you when they find her and bring her home."
Dar could not keep the tears at bay any longer. The streams ran down her scaly face, making them glisten in the light. Snak frowned at the girl's misfortune as she licked her teeth clean.
"To make it up to you Argonian, I'll give you my old nag. She's too stringy-- I mean too old for me to use anymore. And as an added bonus," the Orc scrambled about as she wrapped up a piece of cooked meat in parchment. "Here, it's my special recipe. I'm sure after all that crying you'll be quite hungry."
Dar-Ma nodded her head as she took the package. She muttered a thank-you as her lips quivered, more tears traveling down the contours of her face. She left without another word, her entire world breaking like her heart.
As soon as the door shut, Snak gra-Bara let out a hearty laugh. Just like paint horses, Argonians were fools.