Now that Noah's big secret is out in the open, a gentle calm has settled over the little family. Even June seems to like Gabriel, and encourages Elle to have him over more often. Noah loves the attention, and when they are sitting in the living room after dinner, he flits around from his mother, to his father, to his surrogate grandmother.
"See what I can do?" he asks June, then crouches on the floor in a squat to perform a sloppy somersault. June claps, praising Noah for his gymnastics and he proceeds to perform two more, one for each parent.
Elle is leaning against Gabriel, her head tucked against his shoulder while Noah scampers around, then goes to his bedroom and comes back with a bucket of trains, settling himself in the center of the living room and gleefully setting up his train station.
"I thought June could watch Noah tonight," she murmurs softy, and Gabriel nearly gets whiplash when he moves to look at her.
"What?"
She glances at him nervously, her lower lip caught between her teeth, "I thought maybe…we could go to your house, or…a hotel. June said she could watch Noah."
Gabriel swallows hard, "Yeah, yeah, we could back to my apartment."
"Alright," Elle says, and lays her head back down against his chest. Noah builds his trains and Gabriel wonders how fast he'll heal from the heart attack he's about to give himself.
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They tuck Noah in together, taking turns reading from the pages of his storybook, and Noah's little head turns back and forth between his parents.
"Daddy, I need more story," Noah says plaintively when Elle closes the book, "Else I might have nightmares."
"Why will you have nightmares?" Gabriel asks, raising a teasing eyebrow.
Noah doesn't reciprocate the grin. Instead he very seriously explains, "There monsters in this book," he points to the book that Elle has just closed, "Monsters is scary so I need more story."
Elle shrugs her shoulders at Gabriel and hands him another picture book. If she's honest with herself, she's grateful for the delay. Maybe the butterflies will calm down between now and the ending of iGreen Eggs and Ham./i
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Once Noah is asleep, Elle thanks June for watching her son and walks outside with Gabriel. He holds out his hand and she takes it, twining her fingers with his.
"You're sure?" he asks, and she nods once. "Okay. Don't let go of my hand."
Everything disappears for the weirdest second and then she and Gabriel are standing in his tiny New York apartment; they've traveled hundreds of miles in less than a minute.
"Whoa," she breathes, "head rush."
"You get used to it," Gabriel says, rubbing a gentle hand up and down her back. An awkward silence descends and Elle glances around the room.
"How long have you lived here?" she asks, walking over to the window to peer out at the street below.
"A couple of years," he answers, coming up behind her. When he wraps his arms around her, she jumps, then relaxes. She leans back against his firm chest, covering his arms with hers.
"It's so pretty," she says, still looking out the window at the bright lights. Elle has been to New York before but she's never seen it like this, from a window in an apartment high above the ground.
He kisses the side of her face, his lips gentle against the rough scars on her cheek, and he slowly trails kisses over her face until he can leave a soft kiss against her temple, "You're pretty," he says, and she laughs nervously.
She knows he's lying but she can't bring herself to care. She turns around in his arms and kisses him, her lips pressing insistently against his.
"Elle, you don't have anything to prove to me…" he says, but she silences him with another kiss, her arms coming around his neck so she can hold on to him. He's careful, almost too gentle with her, as he touches her back so lightly she can barely feel him.
"I know," she says when she pulls back, "I just...," she places a tender kiss against the corner of his mouth, "I thought we could have some time with just us, again."
He smiles, and then twines his fingers in her hair, tipping her head up so he can kiss her again. She responds eagerly, her fingers scraping against the back of his neck as she arches into the kiss. His hands move down to cup her hips and she lets him pull her against him. Elle can feel his hardness pressing against her and she knows exactly what she wants.
She moves her hands from his neck to the hem of his shirt. She tugs timidly at the fabric, looking up at him, and he raises his arms for her. She drags the shirt over his head, standing on tiptoe so she can reach him. He chuckles, breaking some of the tension, and she runs her fingers over his chest.
"Elle," he whispers, pulling her against him. He cups her face in his big hands and kisses her again. Just having her in his arms is such an aphrodisiac he can hardly stand it. She pushes her tongue between his lips, tracing the contours of his mouth with the tip of her tongue until he lets out a low moan.
He scoops her up, cradling her without breaking the kiss, and stumbles over to the bed. Gabriel sets her down like she's made of glass and kneels on the floor at her feet. She's so small they're nearly at eye level and he carefully reaches forward to slide his fingers under the bottom of her shirt. She smiles at him, combing her fingers through his hair before she raises her arms, her invitation clear.
Elle lets him lift her shirt, pull it over her head. She closes her eyes as he drops it to the floor, her lip caught between her teeth. Gabriel watches her hands ball into scared fists, and he reaches for her, waiting until she opens her eyes to place a tender kiss on the back of her hand.
He kisses her stomach next, right on the line where the scars on her stomach meet the taut, smooth skin of her belly.
"I'm sorry, Elle," he sighs, his breath warm against her skin, "I'm so sorry."
She shakes her head, "I don't want to talk about it anymore."
Instead of arguing, he kisses her belly again, then her shoulder. It makes him ache to look at her…to look at what he did to her.
Elle watches the sadness cover his face, and she does the only thing she can think of to change his expression back to the contented arousal from only minutes ago: she tugs on his arms until he sits on the bed next to her, then climbs into his lap and unsnaps her bra.
"I want you to make love to me," she says, and it's the first time she's asked for that. She thinks she understands now, the difference between having sex and making love, and she can feel it in the way the pads of his fingers touch her breasts.
He cups their soft weight in his palms, brushing his thumbs over her nipples until she sighs contentedly, her eyes drifting shut. He kisses the tip of each breast, closing his lips around her nipples and flicking his tongue over them.
"Please?" she begs, and he carefully picks her up so he can settle her on the bed. He moves over her, taking his time, leaving a trail of kisses from her nose to her belly button, and then unsnaps her pants.
She lifts her hips eagerly, and he drags her pants down her legs. She kicks a little and her shoes fall to the floor. He takes each of her feet in turn, tugging off her socks and kissing the soles of her feet until she giggles and pulls her feet away from him.
He's pretty sure he'd give his life to hear her laugh again.
When she's naked except for her black cotton panties, he moves to kneel between her legs. She knows immediately what he intends and her legs slide further apart in anticipation.
He kisses her over her dampening panties, tonguing her through the cotton until her legs start to shake. Then he drags the cotton down over her slim legs and crawls up her body so they're face to face.
She's trembling as he moves his legs over hers, and he reaches for her hand, meaning to calm her.
When his fingers touch hers, she jerks and bites her lip, and Gabriel's stomach drops out.
"Open your eyes, Elle," he begs, moving to lie next to her. He rubs his hand over her belly, a touch meant to soothe and not arouse. When her blue eyes flutter open, he carefully moves his hand between her legs, tracing the soft folds with the softest of touches.
"I don't want to hurt you," he tells her and she nods, her eyes locked on his.
"I know you don't," she says, and he almost believes her.
They lay like this for a long time: Elle on her back with her head turned towards him and Gabriel on his side, his hand on her, until he sees her start to relax. When her calm begins to turn to growing arousal, he slides one long finger inside of her. She whimpers and bucks against his hand, and reaches for him again.
"I want you," she says, and tries to pull him closer, to let him cover her body with his.
He takes his hand away and unbuttons his jeans, kicking his pants and boxers to the floor before he guides her over him, cupping her hips in his palms. She settles over his thighs, giving him a look of confusion.
"I don't want you to be afraid," he says, and she shakes her head firmly.
"I'm not," she insists, and kisses him to prove it, "I just…please, I didn't mean to make you think…"
He silences her with a gentle finger over her lips, then encourages her to straddle his hips. She sinks down onto him slowly, her tight, wet, heat engulfing him.
"Have you…" the question rises to his lips unconsciously, but he doesn't even need to finish.
"No one since you," Elle tells him honestly, and his hips buck until he is buried in her. Her mouth opens in delight as her eyes slam shut, the feeling of him moving inside of her too much for her to bear.
He keeps his hands on her hips, giving her balance without trying to guide her too much, but it doesn't matter. This time it is Elle who reaches for his hands, pulls them away from her hips so that she can twine her fingers with his, using him for balance as she writhes against him.
She's in his arms, pressed against him when he finally rolls them both over so that he can thrust harder into her. She screams, throwing her head back as he slides his hand between them so he can rub her clit with the pad of his thumb.
That little extra touch is all it takes to send Elle flying over the edge, and when she comes her inner muscles clench so tightly around him that he can't hold off his orgasm either. She's panting under him, her hands clenching around his biceps, her nails leaving little half-moon indents that heal over as soon as she moves her hands away.
He takes a minute to catch his breath, then rolls over onto his back so that she can curl up in the curve of his arm, using his chest as a pillow. She traces her finger in random patterns over his chest while his hand rubs her back slowly.
"I missed you so much," she murmurs, her voice so quiet he only just hears her, "even when…when I had just moved," she says, "I missed you. Every time Noah cried or looked at me, all I could see was you."
He doesn't know what to say so he just wraps his arms tighter around her, holds her and kisses the top of her head again.
"I love you," he whispers.
The minutes tick by in silence, and Gabriel is sure Elle is asleep. He pulls another blanket over her naked body, and she nuzzles against him.
"I think I love you too," she murmurs finally.
He doesn't deserve her forgiveness or her love, but he can't bring himself to voice the truth. Instead, he presses a gentle kiss to her forehead, and holds her while she sleeps in his arms.
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They return to Elle's home the next day after a lazy, content morning in bed. He'd woken her with kisses until she reciprocated, then had let him explore her body with his mouth, kissing over her scars until she was no longer self conscious about them, until he internalized that she had not just forgiven him, but had given herself to him once more.
He wouldn't screw up again.
Gabriel blinks them in at the foot of her driveway, in the cover of a big tree, and they walk up the driveway together, hands clasped. Noah breaks away from June and tears down the gravel, making a beeline for Elle. She lets go of Gabriel's hand just as her tiny son launches himself from the ground into her arms.
"Mama, mama, I missed you!" he tells her, wrapping his little arms around her neck and hugging her tightly, "June made me oatmeal and we played blocks and zoo this morning!"
Elle laughs happily, "I can't wait to see what you built," she tells him before he squirms into his father's arms, loudly clamoring for a piggy back ride as they approach the house.
June leaves for work and the little family spends the day together doing nothing important. Gabriel helps Noah finish block architecture on the castle he is building while Elle makes lunch, then they spend the afternoon at the park until the setting sun encourages them to head home.
After dinner, Elle reads Noah a bedtime story and snuggles him in, sleepy herself as Noah badgers her with questions about sleeping monsters and flying teddy bears until she promises more answers in the morning and turns off the light.
Noah pretends to be asleep until he hears his mother preparing for bed. Once it sounds like she is in bed and sleeping, the little boy pads to his mother's room. Both of his parents are curled against each other, sound asleep and Noah carefully crawls between them, snuggling into his daddy's arms and pressing his cheek against his mother's silky nightgown as he, too, falls fast asleep.