OK, I know I'm a lot behind with my other stories but I've had really bad writer's block for a while. This is a story I've been working on for a while and recently the plot bunnies came and attacked me so I wrote some more. Second chapter is done and will be posted in a few days, I just wanted to give myself time to finish it without making you all wait too long for the next installment XD

Slightly AU, and I've only re-read it once or twice so if there are any spelling or grammatical errors, I apologise.

Song used in chapter 1 is Queen's Fat Bottomed Girls. I make no money from the use of this song.

Karaoke

"Al, where are we going?" asked the Fullmetal alchemist for the 12th time.

"It's a surprise brother. I've told you that so stop asking" replied Al, a frown creasing his forehead. "Why do you always insist on constantly asking questions when you already know the answers?"

Ed just smiled, winding his brother up was just so easy.

"Come on Al be nice, it is my 18th birthday after all." Ed batted his eyes at his brother while smiling from ear to ear. Al just glowered at him and sighed.

"That didn't work when we were kids brother and it doesn't work now" he said menacingly. "Just be patient."

"Spoil sport" Ed replied playfully. He hadn't noticed that Al had slowed down and then turned into a driveway. He didn't really notice where he was until he looked up again when he heard a noise. Al was knocking on a door, and not just any door. It was answered by a familiar dark haired, dark eyed man.

"Colonel Bastard?" Ed exclaimed turning to Al "what the hell are we doing here?"

"It's nice to see you too Fullmetal" remarked colonel Mustang riley. "Al I've got that stuff ready for you."

"Stuff, what stuff?" asked Ed, suspicion evident in his voice.

"The colonel is just lending me some books" Al told him. "Don't worry, it'll only take a minute and then we can go celebrate."

"Come on in a minute while I get you the books." Roy Mustang stood aside and allowed the Elric brothers to pass him. He noted the look in Ed's eyes and smiled. 'Always suspicious' he thought. As Ed walked by him, his almost black eyes were drawn to the teens leather clad ass. He smiled in appreciation as he starred, 'I always did like a cute butt' he thought sniggering to himself.

Ed turned quickly at the sound of his commanding officer sniggering and swore he saw the mans eyes shoot up from what would be ass level to stare directly into his golden eyes.

"Brother, what are you doing?" Al asked, interrupting Ed's thoughts.

"Nothing Al, just waiting for colonel Mustang to lead the way." Ed replied, making an elaborate show of allowing Mustang to walk past him.

"Why thank you Fullmetal" Roy said, equally as sarcastic as Edward.

"Get a room already" muttered Al under his breath.

"What was that Al?" Ed asked.

"What was what?" Al said in his sweetest I'm-so-innocent voice.

"I thought you said something" Ed persisted.

"Me? I didn't say a thing brother. Shall we follow the colonel and get those books?" Al said as brightly as he could manage.

"They're in here boys, damn the bulb in the lamp must have gone. Let me get the light switch." Roy said, moving over to the side and dragging Al slightly along with him leaving Ed stood alone in the light from the hallway.

Just as Ed was becoming even more suspicious and was about to turn around and wait for Al outside, the lights flickered on and Ed was confronted by quite a gathering of people all yelling 'surprise'.

"Happy birthday brother" Al said standing just to Ed's left, but still far enough away to avoid Ed's hand if he felt the need to punch someone for this.

"Al, when did you…? How did you…?" Ed was at a loss for words, this was something he had never expected, especially not at the home of his commanding officer.

"It was all Colonel Mustangs idea" Al told the astonished teen. "He even contacted Winry and auntie Pinako." Ed looked at Roy Mustang with obvious questions in his eyes not least of which was why.

"It's not everyday one of my subordinates turns 18 Fullmetal. After all, most members of the military are over that age when they finally get a posting. It is something to be celebrated and you know how I love a good celebration." Roy watched the confusion play out on Ed Elric's face until finally Ed seemed to have gotten the message and was smiling, if you could call it a smile.

"Thanks Al" he said turning to his brother and giving him a hug. After that he just walked into the room to meet and greet the people who had come to wish him a happy birthday. Roy just stood there, mouth open, a silent question on his tongue. 'Where was my hug?'

Ed made his way around the room, stopping here and there to great people and thank them for coming and yes he was surprised and yes Al was really good at keeping secrets and no there was no way the colonel had done this out of the goodness of his heart the bastard was after something.

It didn't take long for the music to relax everyone and for the drink to start flowing. Havoc being Havoc had spiked the punch so most of the people there were well on their way to being very happy party goers. Ed had steered clear of the punch and so was unaffected, Al however was another story. He had managed to find an old Karaoke machine after one of his frequent trips to the floor and had somehow persuaded Falman to help him move it out into the room.

The second the guys saw the machine they began pestering Mustang about using it and asking what songs it had on. Not wanting to be taken away from his Elric ogling he had handed over the instruction manual and had proceeded to stare at Ed's ass again. He could have sworn Ed was aware of his ogling, at least he didn't think the young blond alchemist swayed his hips like that usually. He was rather enjoying the show.

When the first few notes of Queen started, Roy's head shot up from the hypnotic sway of Ed's hips and he groaned. Why hadn't he seen this coming? Havoc was involved after all. When he saw Havoc and Breda drag Al in front of the machine and pass him a mic he hung his head in pity, the poor boy really was too young to die.

"Are you gonna take me home tonight
Ah down beside that red firelight
Are you gonna let it all hang out
Fat bottomed girls
You make the rockin' world go round"

Riza heard the words but she didn't think anyone would be that stupid, then again she hadn't reckoned with Havoc.

"Hey I was just a skinny lad
Never knew no good from bad
But I knew life before I left my nursery
Left alone with big fat fanny
She was such a naughty nanny
Heap big woman you made a bad boy out of me
Hey hey!"

She glared daggers at the three rather oblivious drunks in front of her and slowly reached for her gun. Next to her she felt the Rockbell girl tense and reach into a hidden pocket. The girl drew out a wrench and Riza briefly wondered where she had been hiding the thing before returning her attention to the soon to be bullet ridden men in front of her.

"I've been singing with my band
Across the wire across the land
I seen ev'ry blue eyed floozy on the way
But their beauty and their style
Went kind of smooth after a while
Take me to them dirty ladies every time"

Roy threw a quick warning glance to Ed who had also sensed the danger the second he'd bothered to listen to the lyrics and from opposite sides of the room the two made their way to ground zero.

"Oh won't you take me home tonight?
Oh down beside your red firelight
Oh and you give it all you got
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockin' world go round
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockin' world go round"

They arrived just in time to step in front of the two rather upset women before anything worse could happen.

"Hawkeye, put down the gun" Roy wasn't sure the woman had even heard him until she darted her eyes up briefly to meet his.

"It will only take three shots sir" there was no hesitation in her voice, she meant every word and Roy could think of no excuses plausible enough to save the three singers.

"Hawkeye I can not allow you to do this." He hoped his commanding voice would be enough.

"One shot sir, just Havoc" It almost sounded like a question, like she was asking for permission to shoot one of her colleagues.

"I do not want blood on my carpet lieutenant, it has just been cleaned." Roy had used the only excuse that his Ed muddled brain could come up with. He breathed a sigh of relief when Riza lowered her gun and replaced it in the holster. He walked her to the drinks table and took a glance back to check on Ed.

"Winry, put down the wrench. Where did you hide that thing anyway?" Ed tried to placate his mechanic and old friend while trying not to incur her wrath and get hit with the heavy object himself.

"I always keep one handy and I'm not putting it down Ed, so unless you want the first shot I suggest you move and let me at Al." Ed flinched but held his ground. He couldn't let his little, well younger, brother feel the same pain he'd felt all these years.

"Winry you can't do this. Please put down the wrench, for me." He tried to bat his eyes but it just didn't work for him so he used the face he always used to pull out when trying to get the last cookie from his mom. The puppy dog eyes had always been his favourite face. Winry seemed to be cracking and he poured on the charm some more. "After all, it is my birthday". She hesitated and finally began to lower the wrench only to stop and smile. The smile looked positively evil.

"On one condition" Ed cringed and almost told her to go ahead and beat Al but instead took a deep breath and stepped forward.

"Name it" it couldn't be too bad, could it?

"You have to sing on the karaoke and I get to choose the song."

Mustang looked over to Ed for what seemed like the twentieth time, Winry was still holding the wrench but it was now lowered, Ed must have managed to talk her down. He breathed a sigh of relief at the fact that Ed was good at something but soon his thoughts were over run by confusion. Ed's face was contorted into a look that Roy thought he would never see on the eighteen year olds face, Ed's face held a look of fear.

~*~*~*~*~*~

"Oh Hell no!" Ed stated with as much conviction as he could muster.

"Fine" Winry shrugged her shoulders casually and began lifting the wrench back up into a throwing position.

"Wait, just wait" sighing, Ed hung his head in defeat. He had two choices, he could either let Winry attack Al and beat the poor defenceless drunk or he could sing a song that would no doubt be completely embarrassing. Neither was very appealing.

"Well…" she prompted, making a point to tap him with the metal tool.

"I'm thinking" Winry smirked; she knew she'd won and she had the perfect song in mind for the blond to sing. "Fine, just nothing too outrageous ok." Ed did not like the look on Winry's face. "Winry, what song are you gonna make me sing?" he wasn't sure he wanted to know.

"You'll see" and with a quick smile aimed at Ed, the girl turned and walked away into the crowd, Ed blinking after her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~