What is Needed

Characters: Tsuna, Hibari, not really Hibari/Tsuna
Rating: G
Words: 1292
Summary: "Once, long ago back when he was still growing into the role of Decimo, Tsuna had fancied himself to be in love with Hibari Kyouya." Tsuna, Hibari, and the anatomy of emotions.
Warnings: Spoilers for Chapters 218 and above.

It begins, as always, with a tea ceremony.

Tsuna sits in seiza, legs folded underneath him, back straight and hands folded on his lap. Hi muscles are still and eyes tranquil as he watches Hibari go through the motions of preparing the tea. His gaze lingers – for a moment – on the thin wrists exposed by the movements, pale skin framed by the black silk of the kimono. For a brief moment, his breath hitches.

Hibari stops, eyes lifting up to meet his, dark and piercing. Ten years ago, Tsuna would have shied away, a small cry of terror on his lips, but those luxuries he cannot afford now. He simply raises his head to meet Hibari's stare, steady and unflinching. Lips curving up in a smirk, Hibari continues to whisk the tea.

It's a challenge every time Tsuna leaves the Vongola base to walk into Hibari's Foundation. A test that is similar to one they played in their youth – be silent while I sleep, or I'll bite you to death. Every movement each of them makes is deliberate – one false step, one extraneous noise, and Tsuna will be chased out without much being done. He knows this; he has been playing this game for long enough to know all the rules that Hibari has set.

When his Cloud Guardian sets the wooden cup of green tea in front of him, Tsuna picks it up, turning it around twice in the traditional expression of gratitude. He sets it in front of him, watching Hibari takes a sip, momentarily distracted by the curve of the lips and the sight of smoky lashes against pale skin.

Hibari Kyouya is a beautiful man.

"I'm leaving for Rome next week," Tsuna breaks the silence gently, with a low voice and neutral tones. Outside, the bamboo shishi-odori taps against the stone rhythmically, seconds passing before Hibari chooses to accept his words.

A click as the cup is set to the mat, and Hibari's arms fold across his chest before he speaks. "I know the schedule, Sawada Tsunayoshi." It is not a rebuke, but a statement of fact.

Tsuna inclines his head, acknowledging the words, but when he speaks it is as if Hibari has not spoken, as if there hasn't been a pause at all. "Shouichi-kun is now one of Byakuran-san's most trusted men, so he will be there as-"

"You'll die," Hibari interrupts him, and Tsuna falls silent immediately. The bamboo clicks against stone again, and Hibari's eyes are cold steel, merciless. Tsuna takes the look as a cue to continue.

"I know," he says, sleeves brushing each other as he crosses his arms within them. His eyes are dark, full of the resolve that previously only the Dying Will bullets were able to bestow upon him. "I'm prepared for that to happen, Hibari-san."

"What will you tell them?" Hibari asks. You, because Hibari will never willingly work with the other Guardians; it is already enough that he acknowledges them. Tsuna smiles slightly, but there is no mirth in it.

He picks up the cup of tea, bringing it to his lips to hide that his hands had been clenched hard enough for the knuckles to turn white. "Nothing," he says, and he is proud that his voice remains impassive. Taking a breath, he continues.

"My past self is coming to this era in exactly a month's time. Reborn's past self might arrive a little earlier. I need to ask another favour of you, Hibari-san."

Hibari does not answer, merely resting his eyes on Tsuna, and Tsuna can feel the weight of that gaze, the weight of those expectations upon him. Don't tie me down; don't disappoint me. Hibari's eyes have always been easy to read, broadcasting his emotions to the world because Hibari is a man who has never bothered to hide them.

He simply has less of them.

Tsuna puts down his cup of tea again and does not fidget, does not bow. He simply holds Hibari's gaze with his own for a moment, showing him with more than just words the strength of his resolve. It is a reminder – you are my Cloud Guardian.

Outside, Hibird starts to trill the Namimori anthem. Both men ignore the sound. Hibari's sleeves move in the wind as he waves a hand, sharp and jerky – an invitation for Tsuna to continue.

"I need you to train my past self for me."

And he doesn't break down from the sudden narrowing of Hibari's eyes, the thinning of his lips. He knows that Hibari dislikes being tied down, dislikes being ordered, but he speaks anyway, because this is necessary. He needs Hibari's help for this.

There is no one he trusts more to be able to do what needs to be done. Even if it means that he dies, or that his past self might die at Hibari's hands, he will still have asked Hibari – and only Hibari – for help.

Because Hibari Kyouya is the most dependable man that Tsuna knows. Because Hibari will never allow emotions – grief – to stop him in his tracks.

He keeps his eyes steady and the rest of his body motionless. In the silence that is periodically broken by the shishi-odori, their wills press against each other, fighting for dominance.

Then Hibari moves: a barely perceptible shift of the shoulders and Tsuna relaxes immediately, smiling again – he knows that he has won this round, at the very least. Hibari will do as he asked, out of respect for Tsuna's determination. For Tsuna's strength.

Tsuna finishes the green tea and sets his cup down to the floor. In one fluid motion, he stands again, all adolescent clumsiness gone. He hears more than sees Kusakabe opening the shoji doors – the man is as efficient as ever – before he lets himself look at Hibari for another instant.

Once, long ago, back when he was still growing into the role of Decimo, Tsuna had fancied himself to be in love with Hibari Kyouya. Because Hibari is simply what he wanted to be: all elegant grace, unbreakable resolve and endless strength. He loved him like he once thought he loved Kyoko; and now admires him with every breath that he has.

He moves towards the door, almost stepping out when he stops, a hand holding on to the edge. Turning around, he gives Hibari a small smile, his eyes serious with just a hint of wistfulness.

"Hibari-san, please don't die."

Hibari looks at him, uncaring as ever but he is looking at him; he acknowledges him. And that is why Tsuna will never voice his admiration and almost-love: because such things will only lose him the respect that he has fought so much to gain from Hibari. Tsuna knows – knows better than anyone because his hyper intuition is useful for these things – that Hibari sees such 'soft' emotions as nothing but weaknesses. To him, it is simply submission. Even for those who claim to gain strength from emotions and bonds, he has nothing but disdain because his own strength needs no outside source.

"Don't be ridiculous," Hibari says as he stands, turning away from Tsuna. His back is straight, shoulders set, and there is – and always has been – that air of anticipation and deadly intent that Dino Cavallone once told him is characteristic of a boss.

Tsuna inclines his head even though he knows that Hibari will not see it. His smile widens as he walks back to the Vongola mansion, footsteps soft and careful – this is Hibari's domain, and Tsuna knows better than to disobey the rules.

Tsuna knows better than to appear weak in front of Hibari; knows better than to voice his admiration, much less love.

After all, a mafia boss needs respect far more than love.

End