Summary:
Zero cannot stand the apparent bond between himself and Kaname that has developed as a result of drinking the pureblood's blood and yet that bond pulls him in….
Notes:
This one is for all the ZxK fans out there, I'm not sure if I'll be filling that "cliché" stereotype of meaningless man-secks or whether this will be angst-y enough for you angst lovers… but I'll try!
Characters / Pairings: Zero x Kaname (Yuki is mentioned in some places)
Warnings: Lemon-y (ish) nonsense, some swearing and possibly some violence (blood). But if blood worries you, why are you reading a vampire Manga…. o.o;;
Disclaimer: I don't own Vampire Knight or the characters, I'm a poor person who just writes stories for fun. Vampire Knight belongs to Matsuri Hino.
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It was the second time this week that Zero had infiltrated the Moon Dorm with his crimson-eyed intent. Again he climbed in to the window of Kaname Kuran's lavish bedroom, as if he owned the place. The pureblood seemed to be used to the hunters presence in his room, perhaps a little surprised that Zero had come again so soon; but he knew what the hunter wanted regardless of the time span between these little meetings.
He looked up with a diplomatic smile and spoke softly "Ah. Zero, you've come for my blood.. Again." He made a point of saying 'again' with an emphasis.
"Shut up, Kuran." Zero barked in annoyance. He would call Kaname 'Kuran' when he was particularly annoyed by something the pureblood did or said. Whenever Kaname had a comment to make about Zero's bloodlust, it annoyed him. He hated that side of himself, the vampirism, he hated it so deeply. Because of his need for blood he had harmed Yuki many times, even if she always promised him it was 'fine' and that she was 'donating' so it wasn't like he was mugging her neck at all. The fact she even described it as 'mugging her neck' made him feel a bit more like a criminal inside. Eventually Kaname had stepped in and (privately) offered his blood. At first it had made Zero angry that this arrogant pureblood even thought of offering it; was he meant to be a dog that would beg for it? Beg for scraps of a pureblood's blood?
However, the relationship of donor and taker was different between them when compared to Yuki and himself. It was almost always silent after the initial words of introduction were exchanged. Kaname was proud; he didn't flinch or gasp like Yuki did, he didn't even ask silly questions like 'do I taste good' (though if he did ever dare to ask, Zero would lie and say 'no you taste like shit').
Yes, their relationship was different even if Zero hated to call it a 'relationship'. That made it sound intimate, made it sound like something more than merely a meal. In his mind there was no doubt of the positions; he was taking what he needed and Kaname was giving it so that Yuki would not suffer. That was all.
He realised that Kaname was looking at him, he had been spacing out as he thought of his position, he glared right back in response: unwilling to relinquish any sort of power to Kaname. He knew that in the Vampire world a strong glare was a sign of defiance and he intended to defy Kaname Kuran until the end of time. They were rivals, not just as Hunter and Vampire but also as people who were involved in Yuki's life. He knew how Kaname felt and he was aware of his own mixed feelings towards the girl whom had gone to lengths try and restore his lost humanity. There was no denying the tense existence they shared, a bond.
Ugh, there it was again. Another intimate word describing them and their lives. A bond. As if they had some special attachment.
He finally managed to growl at Kaname "What are you looking at exactly?"
The pureblood offered a small smile of amusement to the obviously agitated hunter-turned-vampire. He could tell that half of this attitude was being caused by Zero's lust for blood and lack of social skills; he couldn't just ask for blood, he had to be offered and thus take it for himself. Kaname spoke softly "I'm looking at you and wondering just what you're thinking about, Zero, are you thinking of me?" he couldn't resist teasing the hunter about such things.
They had been locked in this blood-soaked union for nearly a year now, originally Kaname had intended to take some of the pressure off of Yuki's neck (which he felt belonged to him more than Zero) and to give Yuki the illusion that Zero was getting better. If he could not destroy the hunter and remove her concerns regarding him completely, then he would at least fool Yuki in to thinking that Zero was alright and thus not something to furrow her brows for. Overtime, however, he had felt the nature of their bond changing; as if Zero were growing addicted to his blood. The thought of the hunter becoming addicted to him was an amusing one. Even if the boys lack of regard for the Vampire hierarchy was depressing; surely he should look a little happier to receive the blood of a pureblood and a Kuran at that!
No, Zero was as stony faced as ever.
"Think of you?" Zero did not hold back the viciousness in his tone "That would be flattering for you wouldn't it, Kuran? Another admirer to add to your long list."
Kaname stood up from where he had been casually sitting, his uniform moved with him and accented his frame perfectly. His voice remained calm and sociable, even if his words lacked tact "Yes it's a long list, Yuki is at the top of it." He flashed a smile at the silver haired boy when he mentioned Yuki "I was rather hoping you would be the second name on the list?"
A hand shot out grabbing the pureblood by the neck, pushing him up against a near by wall. Zero's fangs blared out, as he glared at the slightly taller man with annoyance. His voice was becoming more venomous as he spat each word out "Don't play games with me, pureblood!"
Oh, pureblood. That meant Zero was really angry with him now. Did he push too far, perhaps?
"Yes you're right, Zero." He agreed "I have been playing games with you." His hand reached up, gripping Zero's tightly in an effort to force the hunter to release him. Kaname's eyes were looking directly at the hunter without any sense of fear. He continued to speak as the hunter glared back with furious crimson eyes "You hate me so much, it's kind of flattering." He laughed, softly at the instant look of disgust that formed in the hunter's angry brow as the word 'flattering' was mentioned.
"… Just like her." Zero muttered to himself "Do you purebloods get off on hate, or what?" he was starting to wonder if pureblood vampires had some kind of confusion surrounding the concepts of love and hate. He hated Kaname Kuran, with a deep and endless hate. A feeling that twisted his stomach and made his skin burn.
Yes it was definitely hate. He didn't like that guy.
Yet, even as he fiercely told himself how much he hated vampires, pureblood and most of all; Kaname Kuran, he began to dwell on just how close he was to the pureblood's lips. All he could think about in that moment was a kiss. Zero was suddenly taken aback by the unexpected thoughts in his head. His grip loosened around Kaname's neck and he took a step back, still glaring. Kaname was leaning against the wall, his pristine uniform was now lightly roughed up around the neck. Zero could see the pure bloods immaculate skin exposing itself brashly to his eyes. As if the skin itself were taunting him to bite it and mark it. Yet he had already marked that neck with his fangs, many, many times. Each time the marks disappeared as if they required constant application. Kaname's words started to swell in his head; why did he come back so soon after the last time? Was he eager to leave his marks on Kaname's skin permanently? He swallowed thickly, trying to squash down these deviant thoughts that were starting to surge inside him. Zero was suddenly very aware of the purebloods presence, something he had gone to great lengths to ignore. He was aware of those rich brown eyes, tinted with crimson, and how they settled on him with their commanding presence. He could feel how close the pureblood was to him, feel the faint warmth that the vampire's body exuded. He could smell fresh, hot blood underneath his pure near-white skin, he could smell it's bittersweet fragrance and he longed for it.
Kaname did not move, as if he enjoyed watching the hunter's inner turmoil between his learned hatred of vampires and his own vampiric desires for blood and flesh. It was a struggle that most former humans faced, it only grew worse with time. Even if Zero enjoyed the privileged life of being fed on a pureblood's blood, it was still obvious that certain vampire behaviours had crept in to the boy's innermost thoughts and feelings. He allowed Zero the time to struggle with himself, the pureblood had no other engagements planned and this was more amusing than brooding over the situation of Cross Academy.
Zero could feel it in the way Kaname watched, in the way he said nothing but just looked with those arrogant and amused eyes. He knew the pureblood enjoyed this, enjoyed his moments of weakness, the moments when the inner vampire grew strong and demanding. Not just for blood, but for more; for flesh and all the pleasures that the flesh could provide. Of course even thinking of touching and abusing a purebloods body was a sin and if the Night Class knew what Zero was thinking he would surely be killed. He could even see Hanabusa's furious face and Ruka glaring with equal disgust.
His pale hands reached out again, he gripped the purebloods hair tightly and pulled him off of the wall with a rough tug. He growled lowly, at the pureblood but equally at himself and his desires. He was eye to eye with the pureblood, his body was tingling with a sense of anticipation. A raw emotion that he was still fairly new to; even as a Vampire he had rarely anticipated things. He acted on an 'as and when' basis, there was little in his life to relish. At least that was the outlook that he preferred to adopt. However, at that moment he was quivering with the prolonged sensation of waiting, awaiting the moment their lips might touch.
The gap between them, that was already small, soon became impossible to see as the hunter's lips meshed with the purebloods in a crushing motion of dominance. He had started to tell himself all sorts of lies, about how this was a way of exerting power of Kaname. He knew that was just untrue, it would be better to say he was more like a dog trying to get it's leg up; something crude and dirty as he felt when he kissed the man before him. He was expecting Kaname to react, to push him off and give him some sort of lecture about how his lips were reserved for Yuki.
The pureblood did not make a movement to remove Zero's lips from his. Instead he was returning the brutal kiss that the hunter had started, as if the pureblood welcomed the contact from another. Zero wondered whether the pureblood was starving for contact? He was more than aware that Kaname was devoted to Yuki and yet he also knew how cruel Yuki could be to him. Yuki's pure adoration, near worship, of Kaname made her view him as almost god-like and thus too perfect for her to be with. Zero understood from the way the pureblood returned the contact from a mutt like himself, Kaname wanted any scrap of emotion he could get. There was no respect between the two of them, no adoration, no fear; only pure hatred and that must have been a feeling that was fairly new to the pureblood. He knew Kaname was proud, he had always known that the pureblood carried himself with an air of confidence; yet right now that air seemed to be a mask to hide the vulnerability the man had to shoulder alone. Zero had already heard from the overly talkative Aido that Kaname had no family in this world, a lone pureblood; he was forced to shoulder all his private thoughts and feelings to himself. There could be no dirty confessions to a trusted 'other' – not in the vampire community at least.
Zero started to realise that the blood Kaname gave to Zero was not merely a way of protecting Yuki, it was also a way to be closer to someone, anyone. The pureblood pulled away, his voice broke the silence that had become heavy.
"You're wrong, Zero." He stated, as if he understood what was in the hunters head "I don't want anyone… If I wanted anyone, this would be far easier than it is. Do you really think my first choice would be a hunter from the Kiryuu clan?"
Zero stared at him and muttered, "What's that supposed to mean? If I'm such a mutt why didn't you push me off?"
"Because I can't always control my feelings." The pureblood murmured in a hushed voice, as if he were confessing something that was uncomfortable to admit.
Zero smirked a little; it was a dry smile "Oh…? The 'awesome' pureblood can't control everything?"
Kaname looked at him, he snorted a little at the hunters dryness "You're so cruel, Zero, I'm offering you my secrets. Aren't you curious to know more about the purebloods you despise so?"
"…." Zero's lavender eyes looked at the pureblood with a mixed expression of confusion and anger "Secrets? What? That you can't have Yuki so you'll go with second best?"
"We don't speak of what we feel." Kaname said, as if he were ignoring Zero's words "To tell anyone of our inner feelings is an expression of weakness, something that pureblood's cannot risk. You understand a little of what I feel, I'm isolated, Zero. The Night class adore me, the Day class worship me and even Yuki does not seem to look at me the way I would like her to. You're the only one who refuses to admire me blindly. It's what I like about you."
Zero pulled away from Kaname and paced around the pureblood's lavishly decorated bedroom, he had seen everything inside the room countless times and yet it was easier to look at the repetitive scenery where he took his blood than face the vampire in the corner. He looked at everything, anything, that was not his face with those honest brown eyes that stared him down. The desk and chair where Kaname would work, the large four poster bed with a canopy of thick red cloth draped over it, the tall windows with rich crimson curtains, even the carpet which was an uninteresting block of colour.
"Stupid vampires." He muttered, rubbing his face; he could feel the hunger for blood returning as a dry ache in his throat. His hand moved down to touch his throat, willing the feeling away. He continued to mutter "You're always trying to tangle everything up in your webs…. No better than spiders really…"
"You trapped yourself in this web, Zero." Kaname told him "You did not have to take anyone's blood, you're a hunter. You had methods of removing yourself from these difficult situations. Yet, you want to live." He told the hunter the truth that Zero never confessed to.
You want to live.
Zero turned and stared at the pureblood who had remained standing in the corner of his room where he had been pushed. How could this vampire understand him, even without taking a drop of his blood? He had told Yuki a bit about how he could 'feel' what she wanted by drinking her blood (and it had repulsed her as he had hoped), but this pureblood had never once settled his fangs in to Zero's neck and yet he spoke of everything that the hunter felt and knew. He did want to live, he had known all along that a well-placed bullet would end his life; but he had never once really thought about pulling the trigger. The reasons why he wanted to live, however, were still hard for him to grasp. Originally, after Shizuka had bitten him, he swore it was all for revenge. He would live to kill that woman and then, almost in a blaze of glory, he would die having earned his family some sort of retribution. Perhaps it was Ichiru and the way he was so devoted to Shizuka that bugged him? Perhaps it was Yuki and how she shouted at him not to be so careless? He wanted to piss Ichiru off, it was a shitty thing to do to his twin but he knew that his own vampirism was a source of never ending torment to Ichiru who longed to be the vampire. He did not want Yuki to cry, even if she could be annoying and a bit bratty at times (not to mention totally devoted to vampires, which was creepy), but still her tears were a source of torment to him.
Living had suddenly become a far more tempting option after Shizuka was dead. He had wanted to survive.
"Yeah." He said, looking at the pureblood "You're right. I want to live. And I did trap myself in this web of blood and fangs." He offered the pureblood one of his typical, arrogant smirks "So are you going to give me your blood or am I going to get it else where, Kuran?"
The pureblood closed his eyes, a slightly exasperated smile on his lips, he huffed at the hunter "You're difficult, Zero." Kaname slid out of his tailored jacket; it was better to avoid staining the coat with blood. His elegant fingers reached up, he unfastened the first few buttons of his black shirt and exposed his neck fully to Zero. He did not bother to invite the hunter, he merely moved his head to the side slightly so that Zero had a full view of neck.
Zero's fangs pierced Kaname's neck, he drank on the rich pure blood. The blood was distinct and yet Zero was spoilt by it, he understood that the blood of a pureblood was a special thing and that most of the Night class would be eternally jealous of his luck (if they ever found out). The more he dwelled, the more he realised that he was not desperately hungry, but that he had really wanted this oddly private moment; a moment of seclusion and silence that Kaname allowed him. His fangs withdrew from the pureblood's neck and he pulled away, wiping blood from his lips.
"Are you satisfied?" Kaname asked him, as he adjusted the damp collar of his shirt.
Zero nodded slowly "Yeah…" the bloodlust was gone, it had disappeared moments after biting the purebloods neck and marking the pureblood's immaculate neck all over again. However, that damned vampire side of him still seemed to be restless and he did not understand quite why. In truth he understood, but he did not want to accept what that side of him was thinking about. He turned away quickly and muttered "I'm leaving now."
Kaname did not resist, he simply smiled slowly and murmured "Alright. I'll be here, when you want me."
Zero gave the pureblood a look before grunting and walking towards the window. He disappeared in to the darkness of the evening.
He was always an ungrateful guest, he never closed the window after leaving so Kaname had to close it himself. The pureblood watched, his eyes easily spotting the retreating silver headed prefect as he disappeared in to the evening. He wondered how long it would be before Zero came back claiming to want 'blood' when all along his body required something else. He smiled slowly and returned to his paperwork.
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End of Chapter 1Notes:
I bet some of you are pulling a ( ;.; where's the secks! ) type face, so I'm sorry to disappoint you that there was none in this chapter, but I wanted to split the story up a bit so that it wasn't a one-chapter-wonder.
I don't write much smut (it takes me a while to write something that I'm happy with) so I felt like writing chapters would give me some time to actually plan out the secks scene, but give everyone something to read and something to anticipate?
So please review this, but be a bit gentle with me? I don't write much stuff publicly, so I'd appreciate constructive criticism rather than flames.
Oh also, I always felt like there was an obvious divide between what "human Zero" wants and what "Vampire Zero" wants. Not dramatically like a split personality, but merely differing desires. There were times where Zero bit Yuki without his normal hesitation. I felt like those times were more "vampire Zero" and so I like to think that even if Zero would naturally recoil at the idea of liking Kaname, his Vampire side might like the pureblood more (Even if it's just the allure of a Vampire before a 'master').
So thank you for reading~! See you in chapter 2~!
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Moon Dorm – 03/09/2008