Chapter hurr. Lol.

*sigh* Yes, I've got issues. Anyways, onto the story.

A Hundred Ways

To say he was angry was an understatement. No, Edward Anthony Cullen was absolutely enraged.

Nobody, nobody did that to his little girl.

Especially that dog. Jacob.

Edward growled and broke the glass in his hand, causing his wife to glance at him and roll her eyes.

"Hmm, a sign of life. I was beginning to worry."

He didn't say anything. He just growled. Again.

"What's he done now?"

He snarled, not answering.

"Just don't kill him. Nessie won't ever forgive you."

His gaze went from the wall he was staring at for the past half-hour to his wife.

"Bella- he - no!"

She raised an eyebrow, "Come again? More articulate this time please. Might want to try more words."

"He..."

She rolled her eyes, "Edward, what did he do now? It's not like he kissed her."

His body tensed, his eyes burned with anger, looking almost black. She gasped in shock. Then she smiled.

"Stop smiling."

She rolled her eyes and grinned, jumping up and down in glee. His anger diminished a little bit, seeing his wife act like such a child.

Then he remembered why she was so happy and growled.

She sighed, "Look Edward, you knew it was going to happen one day. They've been together for a two months. Two months! It's about time really."

He grimaced.

"Besides, you knew it was inevitable."

"But I just thought...more time."

"More time?! Goodness, Edward. Poor Nessie has been dying for Jake to kiss her. He has been too," she teased.

He growled. She wondered how many times he would tonight.

"The only reason he didn't until now was because he was scared to death of you."

He sighed, "Apparently, not scared enough."

"Edward...she's not a baby anymore. She's 17 now, and has been physically 18 for three years now."

"She's so young...it's too little time Bella. Then, they're gonna get married, and she'll be gone. Forever, Bella. He's taking her away from me already."

She looked painfully at her husband, feeling the waves of sadness radiate off him.

"Edward...it's not time yet. They've only been together for two months. And he's not taking her away from you, and he won't ever. Ever. She's always gonna be your little girl. Always Edward," she grabbed his chin, forcing him to look into her eyes. "Always."

He smiled sadly, and his gaze softened. Then he scowled.

"No fair," he pouted. "You forced me to look into your eyes. That always breaks me."

She laughed, her beautiful laugh that always made him smile.

"You're such a sap."

He grinned, "Ah, but you love me and all my sappy self."

She sighed dramatically, "Unfortunately."

"Daddy?"

Edward glanced up at his daughter from the newspaper he was reading. She looked pissed.

"Yes, honey?"

She slammed a paper onto the table, making him twitch a fraction of a milliliter.

"What the hell is this?"

He frowned. "Language young lady."

Curious, he looked at the paper. His eyes widened and he gulped.

Oh shit.

"I can explain this..."

She glared at him, folding her arms in front of her chest.

There was silence for a couple of seconds.

"Well then?" she broke it. "What. Is. This?"

He grimaced, "Well, just a little thing I did. Funny thing really. I was just reading...minds...when I read Jacob's. Wednesday night. After your date."

She blushed. Luckily, it was out of embarrassment and not anger. Then she glared at him and got even redder if that was possible.

Unluckily for him, that was out of anger.

"You were reading his thoughts?! How could you? You invaded our privacy!"

"I'm your father! I need to know what's happening with my own daughter."

"No you don't!" she screamed at him.

He sighed, "Sweetheart, I just...it hurts knowing what's going to happen. I wish it wasn't, but someday it will."

Instantly, her eyes softened. She deflated, the anger melting away and hugged her father tightly, sitting on his lap, something she hadn't done for years. She found it oddly comforting. She bit her lip, trying to find what to say.

"Daddy, I'll always be your little girl. You'll always be the best dad in the world. Nothing is gonna change."

"But it is Nessie," he sighed, "You don't see it now, but I do. I know exactly what's gonna happen. And I don't want it too."

She rested her head on his shoulder, "Things might change. But I know one thing that isn't."

He looked down at his daughter, "What?"

"I know I'll always love you."

His heart clenched painfully.

"Besides, it's been only two months Daddy. We've got plenty of time."

He sighed sadly, "I'm afraid I'm too selfish. It's never gonna be enough."

"Well then we're gonna have to make the most of it."

In that moment, he realized his little girl wasn't so little anymore. He smiled sadly and kissed her forehead.

"But," she said suddenly, "If you even try anything from that list I will not talk to you. At all. For the next century. Understand?"

He grimaced, "Yes sweetheart. I won't do anything. Although I was quite fond of number 53..."

"Dad!"

"Okay, okay, jeez."

She smirked and hugged her dad even more tightly to her. She smiled, thinking of all the other many times she fell asleep in his arms. She was nuch younger, but she didn't care. Moments like this...she never wanted to let go. He didn't want to either. The steady beat of the rain calmed her, and her father's humming lulled her into a fitful sleep. The last thing she remembered was her father's cold yet warming arms around her.

Edward felt her body give in completely and he smiled to himself. He kissed her forehead again, and glanced at the paper in from of him.

A Hundred Ways to Kill Jacob Black

He sighed in disappointment. She just had to steal his fun.

Author's Note: Like I said, I've got issues. Anyways, I got inspiration from Daddy's Little Cannibal's oneshot 'Cloud Nine'. I recommend you read her stories. They're amazing. She's my hero of Twilight fanfiction. :D Anyways, tell me what you think. It doesn't take that much to review. Just press that little purple button. And I know it went from angry, to sad, to happy in a matter of seconds. Sue me. xD

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.