Contradictory

Summary: Contrary to popular belief, Yoshio Ootori knew his son very well. That, until the Suoh Heir and the Host Club came to his house… HUMOR.
Author: fiftysix-luver
Rating: K+
Pairings: Hints of Tamaki x Kyouya and Twins x Haruhi
Words Count: 1,305
Warning:
See a spoiler? Please retrieve your prize at my house.
Disclaimer: Wishes do come true. In dreams. Ha.

A/N: Yoshio Ootori is Kyouya's dad, in case you don't know / forget. The last two episodes in the anime don't exist in this fic. Set before the Ouran festival in the manga.

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Contrary to popular belief, Yoshio Ootori knew his third son very well.

He knew Kyouya's ambition to be the heir of Ootori Company, how Kyouya didn't like to lose. He knew his youngest son's desire to win, to get the greatest merit possible. He even knew that Kyouya had a great ability to blackmail someone and his tendency to lower his head so that his glasses glinted and no one could see his true expression.

Yoshio Ootori knew Kyouya Ootori very well.

But despite that fact, Yoshio, as an Ootori, always liked to hear every information first-hand. Thus why he waited until his son woke up this Sunday morning, er, afternoon in the dining room to have breakfast, er, lunch together.

His eyes glinted in amusement when he saw his third son's surprise and smiled in satisfaction at how fast Kyouya managed to hide it.

"Father," he heard his son greeted. 'Why are you here?' he didn't hear his son asked.

"Can't a father have some meal together with his son?" He asked playfully. Yoshio knew, every time he tried to act 'father' to his sons, Kyouya always had this inscrutable, yet funny, look on his face that could make even the coldest man grin. And Yoshio loved to see that expression.

But Kyouya, being Kyouya, always surprised him. The 'look' didn't cross his face at all.

Instead, he could see Kyouya's eyes soften and the teen smiled sincerely.

"You know, father," he said and his voice was clear but soft, "you sound a lot like Tamaki when you speak like that."

"The Suoh heir?"

"Yeah," and with that, Kyouya took a sit in front of him.

Yoshio knew his son was really close with Tamaki Suoh. Since 2 years ago when he ordered his son to befriend the Suoh heir, Kyouya seemed to obey very well. Too well, to tell the truth. From what he heard, Kyouya even went far to make a club with Suoh and if he wasn't mistaken, it was a Host Club.

Of course, Yoshio Ootori could care less about the Host Club. As long as it brought merit to the Ootori family. Because he knew, just the way he knew everything else about his sons, the Club had turned out to be one of the most prestigious clubs in Ouran and after years running, Kyouya had befriended with sons from influential families like the Hitachiins and the Haninozuka.

So, instead of asking 'how's school,' he picked his spoon and started to eat.

They ate in silence. Sometimes, Kyouya would glance at the clock, but say nothing. Until…

"Kyouya, how's the club going?"

Yoshio saw the teen's eyes widened in surprise, then softened again.

"It was fun."

And that was when Yoshio knew something was wrong.

Yoshio knew very well that his sons, especially Kyouya, did not find something 'fun'. Found something interesting, maybe. But found something 'fun'? That was new.

Kyouya took another look at the clock as Yoshio asked, "What do you mean by 'fun'?"

His son paused for a while to think and Yoshio realized that his gaze always softened every time he talked about the club. "Tamaki has this interesting idea to bring the customers to an amusement park, and Hikaru and Kaoru have already thought of a few… scenarios they will use in the park."

Decided not to ask about the (suspicious) 'scenarios,' Yoshio picked a glass of water and drink it.

Kyouya took another glance at the clock for the nth time.

"Kyouya, are you waiting for someone?" He asked.

He could see his third son fidgeted. Kyouya lowered his gaze, as if calculating the pros and cons of telling him the truth. He glanced at the clock again and pushed his glasses up.

He finally muttered, "Actually, father… the Host Club had intended to visit here."

"I see no problem in that," he assured his son, but anxiety didn't leave Kyouya's face.

"No, father, you see…"

"…yes?"

But Yoshio never heard his son finish his sentence because a loud, baritone voice interrupted him.

"MOTHEEEER!!!!!"

He could see his son closed his eyes in irritation and ran his fingers through his hair. When he looked up, he could see the Suoh heir, along with two teens he knew from the Morinozuka and Haninozuka family. He was about to stand up and greet the boys—

whoa. Wait a minute. He stopped. Didn't he hear the Suoh heir say something about mother?

Said Suoh seemed to realize his presence and bowed elegantly at him.

When he looked up, he smiled and said, "I am really sorry for the distraction, Ootori-san. I did not know of your presence, or else I would have made myself more presentable."

Yoshio released a relief sigh. He must have misheard. Of course, how could a heir of such influential family like the Suoh scream childishly? And it wasn't like he saw the kid's mother anywhere in sight…

"So, what happened now, Tamaki?" He saw his son asked and confusion struck him again. The Suoh hadn't greeted his son yet, but Kyouya had been talking as if the blonde boy had called for his name out loud.

"Mother! You see, Father was walking in your house with our beautiful daughter when suddenly—"

WHOA. Whoa. He did not just hear that.

"—suddenly, our twin sons—those unscrupulous doppelgangers—touched her cheeks!" The blonde teen said dramatically like the voice of God announcing the exile from paradise to Adam and Eve.

His son only quirked his eyebrow. "So?"

"'SO!?' JUST 'SO'!?" Suoh replied harshly, "MOTHER!! Those twins—they—HER CHEEKS!!—IT'S—IT'S INCEST!!"

The bespectacled teen sighed. "So?"

WHOA. Yoshio Ootori wanted to smack his head so badly right now. Not only he didn't mishear those—those…familial pronouns, his son had just treated incest like everyday news! He never thought the word 'incest' was even in Kyouya's vocabulary. Or the Suoh's, for this matter.

"Ne, Kyo-chan!" the Haninozuka heir called his son—Yoshio forced himself to belief that he did not just hear his son being called 'Kyo-chan'—and waved his arms like a child, "a good mommy always helps daddy, right Takashi?"

Morinozuka only nodded. Kyouya sighed, then looked at him.

"I'm sorry father, but I think I have some… problems waiting to be solved," he said to him. Yoshio, for a lack of better words, nodded.

The surprise didn't stop, though. As his son stood up, the Suoh hair practically jumped on him. And pounced him. And—and—nuzzled him. Yoshio blinked more than necessary.

"Waaaa~!!! Mother is really sweet, helping daddy like that!!" Suoh exclaimed almost idiotically in exuberance. Yoshio couldn't believe this at all—his son should've been angry. Kyouya should've thrown Suoh away. Kyouya should've gone away to get some medicine because of the insanity his friends caused. Kyouya should've done… something.

Something that is not smiling and only fending him off at an arm's length.

What seemed to be Yoshio Ootori's train of belief and sanity crashed to a mountain and scattered into pieces.

"See you later, father," and with that, Kyouya walked out of the room and closed the door, joining his friends. Yoshio could still hear his son, Suoh, and Haninozuka's voice rang throughout the silent house.

"Look, Dad, let me assure you that no matter how incestuous our twin sons are, they would not rape our daughter just yet."

"'Just yet'!? Mother is so mean!!"

"Wa~! Kyo-chan and Tama-chan are having couple fight!"

And with that, the last remains of his train of sanity washed away by a tsunami.

He only blinked.

--0—0—0—0—0--

Contrary to what Yoshio Ootori belief, he didn't know his son very well.

Because, even though he knew what Kyouya's favorite type of shoes and what side he was up in the morning, the hell if he knew his son was a mother of three with the Suoh heir.

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A/N: Another fic is done~! Hope you enjoy it!

I see that this is yet another humor, gen (almost KyoTama) host club fic. And I'm calling myself a KyoHaru shipper here.

Like this kind of Outsider's POV? Stay tune for my next fic! It's an Outsider's POV too, but this time it's a KyoHaru one. You can read the summary at my profile (shameless advertisement, I know). Because KyoHaru need some LOVE!! XD

That or yet another gen, Outsider's POV Host Club fic, with Host Club x Haruhi implications. I have tons of plot bunnies, you know ;).

Reviews and criticisms are wonderfully appreciated. Grammar and spelling corrections are more than wonderfully appreciated.