A/N: One hiatus to another. Oh well.

Who I am, more than that,

Who you are, more than this,

What that is, unknown feeling,

What this is, unseen visions.

Regrowth - Chapter 6

Sakura checked her notes for what had to have been the tenth time that day. Nothing added up. It made no sense for Nagato to even have the Rin'negan, much less how he used it. Supposedly his parents had been ordinary people leading ordinary lives doing ordinary jobs until they were killed. Neither of them had had this bloodline trait, so why had it shown up in him? For that matter, why was he able to summon metal rods from his body? Everything about Nagato was a biological impossibility to her.

"Alright, I'm going to show you a series of pictures that will go by quickly, and I'll see how many of them you can remember. I need to test the reflexes of the Rin'negan to try and help you." She adjusted a projector nearby, still amazed by the technology that the country of rain boasted. Right now, she needed to determine whether the Rin'negan had similar properties to the Sharingan. Already he had confirmed that there was very little similarity to the Byakugan, though his eyes were more useful in other ways.

"Is this really necessary?"

"Yes, for the last time. If you want me to heal you, I have to be able to understand every aspect of your abilities. For all we know, the Rin'negan might be the source of your problems. I don't know anything about you, really, so I need to find out whatever I can. Now, watch carefully and catch as many of the images as you can." She flipped a switch, the light going on in the projector, then turned through the slides slowly at first, then speeding up until it was too fast for her own eyes to keep up. Finally, she ran out of slides on the enormous wheel.

"Don't bother, I saw all of them." Nagato leaned back in the chair with a sigh, stretching until his back popped. "The last five looked a bit unusual, though. Like someone spilled on them."

"Oops..." She took out the last handful of slides, inspecting them before cleaning them off with her shirt. "Amazing. Your eyes have similar properties to the Sharingan. You could copy all sorts of techniques, but at the same time you would have greater perception and vision depth than the Sharingan. Still, it's definitely more similar to the Sharingan than the Byakugan, which is good since I'm more familiar with that after healing Kakashi one too many times."

"Ah, I remember him. He was definitely useful during the wars, and I do believe he's still alive."

She paused suddenly while putting the projector away, her eyes darting to his. "What? He's dead." Her gaze grew bitter. "He left on a mission and never came back."

Nagato thought for a moment, going through his memory. "It was about a month and a half before you came here. We had reports of a silver haired man with a single Sharingan roaming about the grass country. Your Kakashi is the only man I can think of with such a description. I didn't think anything of the report at the time, I figured right away he must have been under Konoha's orders, so I didn't correspond with them. We've been trying to keep a low profile, after all."

Her hand went to her throat reflexively, her heart giving a sudden leap of joy. "He's alive? I can't believe it... how on earth did he survive? Why didn't he go back to Konoha?"

He gazed at her solemnly. "Why haven't you?" When she didn't answer, he continued. "It could be that he lost his memory in an accident. I've seen it happen to one or two of our own. Usually a head injury or a fever that goes on for too long, but I'm sure you know all about that. Still, my scouts are very reliable, and I'm sure they said he was there, but mind you, this was some time ago. He could be anywhere by now."

"Damn... It's still something, though. At least we know he was alive then. He's probably still around. I hope. Kisame wanted to take me on a sort of mission, to see all of the major countries, and the minor ones too if we want to. He told me that it had been a mission that every Akatsuki member had to take before they were initiated." She laughed under her breath. "It's funny, even with everyone else scattered or who knows what, I still feel like I belong to Akatsuki. At the same time, though, I feel like I'm also a part of Konoha. I don't want to go back yet... not now. Maybe someday. For now, though, I don't have many other options. I could freelance, but I'd much rather take on this mission... even if it doesn't apply anymore."

"Whether it applies or not, it's a good idea. The only way you can comprehend the world is to see the world. Look at it, and see beyond what you can see."

A smirk lit on her face. "Look underneath the underneath, hm?"

"Something like that, yes." He winced suddenly, leaning over to reduce the pain.

Before he could even react, she had hin braced over her shoulder, arm around his waist, pulling him gently to his feet. "Alright, that's enough for now, you need to rest. Don't tell me you're fine, either, you know it won't work." He quietly complied, allowing her to support him as she guided him to the room next door. Inside, she made certain he was laying down before spreading her hands over his midsection, sending chakra into his body to investigate the problem. "I should have known it was too soon to move you."

"No, it's alright. It's not because I was moved. My stomach has been troubling me for some time."

Glaring slightly, she pushed the chakra further down. "That's because you don't eat enough! I swear, you eat like there's no point in eating. Your stomach is the only one that knows any better!" A slight drop of her mouth suggested differently. "Well, are you happy now? You've got a stomach ulcer from all that stress." Focusing her chakra further, she concentrated on his stomach and healed the overgrown ulcer, sighing with relief once it was finished.

"Well-" A large granola bar was shoved in his face.

"Eat it. Now. And don't go without eating because I swear, if you get more ulcers from not eating, I'm not healing them!"

Such a strange girl, he mused. Normally anyone with such an attitude would have been quickly and efficiently silenced, but not her. Besides, he knew better from the old days. Listen to the medic or else. He quietly ate the granola bar, his eyes flicking to hers with focused scrutiny. "Sometimes there is no point in eating, but this is mostly due to how long I have spent needing to keep such a close eye on this country. I'm everywhere at once, and before I know it, the day has been spent. If Konan weren't around to make sure I slept once in a while..." He stopped, not wanting to go into detail.

"Yeah, I know. Well, we'll be here until you're better, so you better get as much sleep as you possibly can, even if I have to sedate you! Don't think I won't."

He had to admit, he was pretty tired. So much for trying to be a god. "I know. All we can do is accept our humanity, and act according to it."

She looked rather ridiculous, mouth open and about to point something out, but his words triggered a distant memory inside. What he said echoed of Itachi, something she had tried to not think about ever since Kisame found her in the desert. "Yeah, that's true. Even the most powerful of ninjas has weakness of the body and the things it requires."

He caught on to what she hadn't said fairly easily, always having been a decent guesser at what was going on in the minds of others. "You're thinking of him."

"Who?"

"Itachi." The empty granola bar wrapper found itself in the garbage, his hand now reaching for the cup of water to the side. He took a long drink, pondering. "You loved him," he added, almost an afterthought.

Her blush was barely contained. "W-what? I never said anything..."

"You didn't have to." For once, he allowed a small smirk to grace his lips. "I knew what was happening. The others never had the ability, but I was able to see your chakra signals when you were near each other. You may have never acted like it in public, but as you said, my eyes catch more than what can be seen."

She huffed slightly. "Really now... Well, so what if I did. It doesn't matter now. What matters now is making sure you're recovering. I'll let you sleep."

As she turned to leave, he added one more thing. "He saw something that others didn't, you know. Underneath that girl desperate to show her worth, underneath the need to find something you could specialize in and finally be good at, he found someone that already knew where that path lay. All he did was direct you down that path."

"So you're saying he kept me here longer than he intended to."

"Despite your very talented mentor, your potential was being stifled under the protective wing of Konoha. If you were in Konoha now, you would be in ANBU." She moved to interject a comment, but he stayed her with a gesture. "I'm tired. If need be, we can talk of this later."

"Well, alright... but you better still be asleep when I come back or you know what will happen!" Before she left, she added a smile. "Thanks."

In the kitchen, Kisame wasn't having much luck with the stove. "Wait, how does this thing work again?"

Konan held back a sigh, turning the knob on the stove. A rapid clicking sound came from the stove, and he edged back cautiously. She only rolled her eyes, waiting until the stove lit. "See? That's all you do. Come on, really, why is it so hard? You've used these before, right?"

"Yeah right..." He eyed the flames warily. "I have this... thing... about fire. Plus, my only experiences with cooking involved either a camp fire or watching someone else do it."

Her thin brow raised slightly at that. Kisame, afraid of fire? Then again, his partner had been Itachi, the essence of unstable. "Well, there's no need to worry about this. If something lights on fire, you can just put it out. Kisame... stop lurking in the corner like that. Come here. I know what you mean about fire, but you can't let your fear rule you." His fear of fire was unwarranted, being a suiton user. Her fear, however, was very understandable with her paper jutsu. "Come here already! If I can do this, you can too."

That comment snapped him out of his daze, his feet reluctantly carrying him to the stove. Before he could say another word, she shoved a spoon in his hand, opening a recipe book. He stared at the print cautiously. "Oh... so... now what? Just follow the instructions?"

"When you're first learning, yes. Later on you'll have a better feel for how much to use, as well as add your own variations, but for now, we will follow this recipe. I'll chop up the vegetables while you practice browning the meat." She grabbed a small package out of the fridge, dumping a pile of chopped beef into the sizzling pan. "Let the meat cook for a little bit, then turn it with your spoon. Keep stirring it until the meat looks done."

"Um... how will I know when it's done?"

"It should be brown and maybe just a little crispy, but not burned. Once it's brown, we'll add the vegetables, and stir it until those are done too. Now, read the recipe. What else do we need besides meat and vegetables?"

He took a moment to peer at the recipe, still stirring the meat absently. "Ah... in a large pot, boil two cups of your choice of noodles."

"Alright, I'll get that started." While she went to grab a large pot, he couldn't help but notice that several sharp paper knives had kept up the vegetable chopping for her. He had to admit, she was one handy woman. For now, he stuck to watching her as she prepared the noodles. This wasn't hard at all once he focused on the task at hand and not the fact that there was a fire burning very close by and that was making him very nervous. Before he could ask whether this looked brown or not, Sakura came through the kitchen door, meandering to the stove curiously.

"Wow Kisame, I didn't know you already knew how to cook a little."

He chuckled nervously, scratching his head. "Well, no, I don't. Does this look brown to you?"

She peeked over into the pan. "Um... kinda. I guess."

Konan took over, looking into the pan. "Not yet, a little longer. I set the noodles to boil at the same time because once they are done, the meat will be done too. Actually, let's put those vegetables in the pan too." With a flick of her wrist, the paper of one of the blades flattened into a small platter, the other knife scraping the vegetables onto it. Kisame moved back to let the curious jutsu do its work, setting back to stirring once the vegetables were in the pan.

"That's a pretty handy technique you have," he muttered.

"The art of paper is very versatile. Whether I need a weapon, transportation, or just something to help with cooking, I can find a variation to use. It's important as a shinobi to be as well rounded as possible."

"I doubt that any of the men here could have complained about how well rounded you were." He smirked, ducking the blow that she aimed his way.

So that's how he learned to be so agile, Sakura mused. She took a moment to glance at the recipe. "Add olive oil and spices to taste? How are we supposed to know how much to add?"

Konan reached for a few spices as well as the oil. "We're supposed to guess, really. I just add a drizzle of oil and a few shakes of basil and oregano." She slipped a colander into the sink, dumping the noodles in to drain. A bit of olive oil went onto the pan of vegetables, along with the two seasonings. Once that was complete, she dumped the noodles back into the large pot, finally adding the vegetables to the noodles and stirring. "Alright, we're done. Would someone set the table?" Sakura immediately went to the task, setting up a serving dish as well as bowls and chopsticks. At a loss, Kisame simply sat down at the table, soon followed by Sakura. Konan dished up each of them a serving, dishing the rest into the serving bowl. "Not bad for your first try, is it?"

Kisame took a very cautious bite, blowing on the noodles. "Hmm, not bad at all! A little bland, but hey, I never liked the fancy stuff anyway."

Sakura regarded the mixture with close scrutiny. "We could always add some curry or hot peppers to make it spicy, or parsley and thyme to make it more savory..."

"Well, cooking is little more than blind experimentation most of the time," Konan added. "Trial and error, mostly error. This, though, is pretty good. I think you two may just be passable chefs someday." She added a sly wink for good measure.

Kisame pointed to the empty chair next to Konan. "He's not joining us?"

"He's asleep, and with luck, he will be all day," Sakura said with conviction. "I made sure he ate something before that, though, so we can put this in the... fridge, right? Is that what that thing is?"

"Yeah, you're not gonna find these things just anywhere. It might be good to make more, though, and sell them to other countries."

She paused for a long time, simply eating until the last bite was gone. Then, without looking up, she spoke quietly. "Would it be alright if we went to the grass country first, Kisame?"

His brows raised at her reserved tone. "Ah... sure. Any particular reason?"

"Nagato said that his scouts might have seen Kakashi there a month and a half ago. If he's still alive, I need to find him."

"Oh, the copy ninja, right? Yeah, I remember, he was your teacher, you said." He stared down at his own empty plate, pondering. "Oh man, he was friends with that guy in thr green suit, wasn't he? If I never see that green guy ever again my life will be perfect." A long groan sounded from his chest. "That moron wouldn't remember me anyway, the twit."

She snickered at that. "Who, Gai-sensei? I often think that most of those who live in Konoha wouldn't mind a few years without speeches about youthfulness. Last I heard, though, he had moved out to the cloud village to finish up a few final peace pacts. It's amazing, but I think that Cloud and Konoha might finally start to see eye to eye. It took a war of insane proportions, but maybe... maybe in the end, it was worth it. I don't know. At the least, it gave us something to salvage from the ruins."

Konan used her paper jutsu to clear the dishes away, her finger tapping on the table thoughtfully. "It is true that recently the Leaf and Cloud have been at peace. Not long before the wars, the Mist came under a new Kage, and ever since, things have been starting to get more peaceful even there."

Kisame perked up at that. "A new Kage? Who?"

"Hm... I'm not certain of her name, exactly, but she was described as having very lengthy brown hair and pale eyes. She's unnervingly cheerful and flirtatious, or so the male scouts said."

He sunk in his chair. "Oh no... Oh please, not her..."

"I take it you know her."

"Yeah, you can say we've... met." The two women eyed him down until he unwillingly continued. "Mei Terumi... I mean, she's very open to suggestions and a fluid thinker, but god... she is such a feminist it makes a guy want to dig himself into a hole. She'll respect you if you're a man, sure, but you better not make any off-handed comments about her, or even anything she might misconstrue as off-handed! Well... at least she's not Yagura. Anyone is better than Yagura was. If you want someone to blame for all of the barbaric practices back then, blame him. You remember Zabuza, Sakura? Yeah, that's who he was trying to kill when he got kicked out. He got us all kicked out for that. The last I heard after being kicked out of the Mist was that his bijuu was removed from him and allowed to roam free until we went out and got it."

Sakura could barely wrap her head around politics sometimes, but she knew enough to make sense of all of this. "At least it should be safe enough for us to go there again, right?"

"I suppose... if we stay out of sight. If we go into the village, though, I have no idea how we would be received. They might try to kill us, they might welcome us back like long lost family. There's no telling how Mei is running things over there now. Let's just stick to finding that sensei of yours, for now."

"Yes... I need to find Kakashi, especially if he lost his memory. I remember now what it was like to be lost without a purpose, I can't imagine what it would be like to forget everything, too." The long pause that followed was uncomfortable, her tone reflecting her long-standing affection for her teacher.

"We'll need a map, then. I know in theory where most things are, but it's still a good idea to keep a map around. I'll be in the library." He rose from the table and left the room, leaving the two women alone. For a while, neither said anything, but eventually Konan spoke up.

"How about we go up to the lookout in the meantime? If Nagato really is asleep, it might actually not be raining for once."

Sakura quietly followed after Konan, following her to the place that had been witness to events that had changed the Akatsuki- and herself- into what they were now. She still remembered the day Pein had brought her here, showing this vast city to her. She remembered seeing Madara in the crowds below, remembered the glint of his eye shining in the dull light. Being here filled her with memories, some pleasant and some not so much, some she would rather forget and some she wished she could remember clearly. However, this time there was no masked man to worry about, no impending doom... no Itachi. Her heart clenched involuntarily, her mind unwillingly sending her back all those years, remembering her last few days with him. Konan stopped at the lookout, sensing something was wrong, turning to look at Sakura.

"Are you alright?"

"I... yeah. I mean no, I mean... I don't know." She paced in a small circle briefly before sitting at the edge of the platform with a thud. "I don't know what's wrong with me. I was finally doing fine, I really thought I could move on now, I was so sure I had put the past behind me. Now I don't know what's going on anymore."

Konan leaned back against the side wall, looking out over the edge of the platform into the city. She understood what it was like being in a place so full of memories. "You want to forget, and yet you don't. You want to abandon the pain, but at the same time it is a part of you you can't deny." She nodded solemnly. "It is the same for me, though in a different way. I almost lost Nagato to that monster. I made sure personally that he wouldn't go any farther, as you remember."

She bit her lip, staring at her hands, though not really looking at them. "I killed Sasuke with my bare hands... Sometimes I still wake up thinking I can still see blood on them. I wanted to forget, forget everything... I wanted so badly to go on like nothing had happened."

"I'll tell you something that Nagato said to me when I said something similar to him. He told me that without the rain, there wouldn't be a rainbow. Whether it's bad or good, all events still happened, and forgetting about them is pointless. We need to remember the people who gave their lives or were injured, so that their loss is not in vain. They fought because they wanted to protect others, because they believed in us."

"Yeah... Kisame said something like that when he found me in the desert. We live to carry on the memories of those that passed on. Itachi reminded me of that we look to the future, so the past doesn't swallow us up. What matters is what we choose to to do now, not what we did then."

"He was wise, and Kisame is wise too. He may not seem like it most of the time, but he is just as much of a deep thinker as Itachi was. However, he keeps it to himself most of the time, so he has definitely been one of the most underestimated members around here. When he first joined, I wondered if he was just some hired muscle, but one day he said something I'll never forget, and it completely changed my perspective of him from then on."

"Oh? What was it?"

"Well, one day I was just minding my own business, making some origami in the main lounge. I was trying to make some stacking origami, so I was very concentrated on it and didn't notice him come in. Naturally it scared me to no end and I panicked, but he just smirked down at the mess on the table and sat across from me. Sasori had been on one of his art rants that day, so I suppose we both wanted to get away from that..."

Her eyes glared up at him. Great. Just what she needed, a watcher. She cautiously put the very last stacking box on the top of the pyramid, sitting back satisfactorily.

"You know, Konan, although Sasori keeps saying his art is eternal and all that, his argument has no substance. I believe that your art is more similar to the realities of life."

She stared at him blankly. "...what?"

He took one of the boxes from the bottom of the pyramid, the whole thing collapsing. Before she could get angry, he gave her the box with a smirk. "We all live in a house of cards, see?"

Sakura leaned against the opposite wall, thoughtful. "A house of cards... yeah, I think I get what he meant. Pull one thing out of alignment, and you have a mess. Cause and effect."

"Yes... it changed my perspective of both him and things in general. Sometimes the small things we do can affect the larger scope of life. Our paths can be changed, but sometimes fate can guide you too. It's a strange sequence of chance and change."

"I won't leave my life up to chance anymore. I'll do what I can to get over this." Looking up at the clear sky, she could see the stars above, shining just the way they did every fateful night of her life. It didn't bother her anymore. Now, she only felt content to let her memories reside in her heart.