Title: Interrupted Indifferences

Disclaimer: Hey, I make the bare minimum, think I own the game? Nope, but I got the story!

Setting: Well, it's after Final Fantasy VII was created 'cause it's got Reno...an' Cloud. So, pick one!

Summary: Sometimes, Cloud's blonde-ness really frustrates Reno... Sometimes.

Warnings: -Laughs-Look at all of my other fics, all'ave got basically the same warnin's.

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Reno smirked as he listened to his phone ringing, knowing Cloud would pick up his house phone. "You've reached Cloud Strife," the blonde answered, making the Turk smirk even more.

"Yo, Cloud!" he said happily, licking a spurt of whipped cream from his finger. "Guess what I'm wearing!"

"...Clothes?"

"Cool whip!"

"...That's nice, Reno."

"Wanna come have some?"

"I'll pass, I already had dinner."

Reno groaned as Cloud hung up again, muttering to himself, "Not fair! Three months I've tried ta get his attention!" Frowning, the Turk redialed the hero's number.

"You've reached Cloud Strife."

"Hey, Strife!"

"...Yes, Reno?"

"I got a whole bottle of lube sittin' right next to me, yo. When can you get here?"

"...What would I need lube for?"

"...Yer jokin' right?"

"No."

"What do you think it's for, yo?"

"...I'm not unsticking your hand from a jar again. Call Rude."

Reno snarled as Cloud hung up again. "For the love of fuck!!" He shifted where he stood as the cold whipped cream that covered his body slid a bit south. Swaying his hips slightly while he stood in the master bedroom, he redialed the number. "Stop hanging up on me!" he snapped before Cloud could give his usual greeting.

"...All right?" the blonde replied sounding bored.

"Yanno why I've been callin' ya?!"

"...Not at all."

"'Cause I'm covered in white cream!"

"Take a shower."

"What?!"

"If you didn't like it, take a shower, or you'll just stay sticky."

"Ya don't get it!"

"...I don't think YOU do. When it dries it will be harder to get off."

"Not what I'm talkin' 'bout, yo!"

"..."

"I want ya over here, NOW!"

"...I'm at home..."

"DON'T CARE, YO!"

"...Where are you?"

"At my place."

"...Which is...?"

"Yer a fuckin' dipshit, yanno?"

"...Goodbye, Reno."

"Wait-!" Reno swore as he heard the dial-tone again. Growling, he dialed the number again. "I ain't playin' with ya, Blondie, get yer ass here!"

"...Why?"

"'Cause I covered myself in whipped cream fer ya!"

"...I like it with fruit, not people."

"Ain't the point, yo!"

"...Then what is?"

"I'm COVERED in it fer YOU!"

"...I don't want it."

"If ya hang up on me, again, Strife, I swear-" He paused here as he heard the dial-tone once more. "ARGH!" He angrily redialed the number. "I'M GONNA TIE YA DOWN AN' BEAT YA I SWEAR IT!"

"...Good luck with that," Cloud said, hanging up again.

"ARGHHHHHHH!" Once again, he redialed. "STOP HANGIN' UP, YA DICK!"

"Excuse you?!" a shrill woman screeched.

"Oops, sorry ma'am, wrong number!" Blushing, Reno hung up before calling Cloud again. "ARE YA HAPPY?!"

"...Moderately so."

"...I hate you."

"Good to know; is that all?"

"NO! I've been tryin' ta get ya in the sack fer the past few MONTHS!"

"...I won't fit in a sack, Reno."

"Not in A sack, in THE sack!"

"...What's 'the' sack?"

"...Ya've gotta be fuckin' with me! There's no way yer THIS dumb, yo!"

"...Again with the name-calling?"

"Hang up on me an' I'll hurt ya, yo! I'm TRYIN' ta tell ya somethin'!"

"...Which would be?"

"I want you!"

"...Want me where?"

"In my place!"

"Why?"

"Because I do!"

"..."

"I gotta be clearer, huh?!"

"...It would help."

"Fuck you!"

"...Now you're swearing at me?"

"ARGH! I WANT TA FUCK YOU!"

"... ... ... ...What?"

"I wanna do ya hard! Fuck ya 'til ya scream!"

"...No."

"WHAT?!"

"I said no."

"Why not?!"

"...If anything, I'd be doing you."

"PROVE IT!"

"...What?"

"I SAID: PROVE IT, BLONDIE! GET YER ASS HERE AN' FUCK ME!"

"...Give me ten minutes."

End (sequel, maybe?) !

Review an' let me know what ya thought! An' fer all of ya "fans" (-snorts-I ain't got none; 'm usin' that term loosely, 'kay?) 're waitin' fer an update, 'm workin' on 'em! Normal deletion policy still stands, an' reviews will be posted after this point. (...That's the point.)