CHAPTER 4

Days had passed since the entire karaoke incident, and Tooru couldn't help but feel offended. He knew Yuujirou had been drunk – that had been obvious – but had the boy been so drunk that he forgot about what had all happened? Did he forget Tooru telling him to try again when he was sober? Did he forget trying to kiss Tooru? Did he forget about the night entirely, forgetting that Tooru wore women's clothes again and had basically sang out his feelings for Yuujirou?

Tooru had been waiting for Yuujirou to confess his love to him. The two sat in the same class, and Tooru found himself sneaking glances at Yuujirou, but had yet to catch the boy even glancing at him. At lunch he thought that he would try to invite Yuujirou to sit with him, but before he could get out a single word, the boy had walked past him and sat down with his other friends. His only friends, Tooru mentally corrected himself, as neither he nor Mikoto were his friends anymore.

Tooru sighed and sat down next to Mikoto, picking at his food without interest.

"I take it things aren't going well?" Mikoto asked, and Tooru could have glared at him, adding on a 'you think?' that was dripping with the venom Tooru felt. But he just sighed and bit down on a piece of bread.

"I think he's forgotten all about it." Tooru replied after swallowing the bread.

"How could you forget that? It's not every day you see a guy in a dress!"

"Um, yes it is. Look, there's one right there." Tooru said, pointing to Moriya, who had donned a black and red Wa Lolita styled outfit and was sitting with a third year.

"I mean a guy who, y'know, is doing this voluntarily."

"I'm pretty sure he's doing this voluntarily. If not, I know Atsushi-kun is. Kazuto-kun is sort of halfway…"

"Not the same! There's nothing to gain from you dressing like that anymore, so it's really weird to see you in a dress again." Mikoto said, taking a drink from a bottle of water.

Tooru was silent for a moment, and sighed. "I think I might stop, anyway. It doesn't feel the same anymore."

"Huhn?"

"It was all just to fill a void, sort of thing, y'know. But now… the void isn't there because of the Princess job. It's there cause of Yuujirou-kun. I missed the times where everything was all normal between us, which was back when we were Princesses. I guess I got that mixed up with missing being a Princess." Tooru's eyes were staring intently at the small apple he had bought, watching it's red surface like it was the most important thing in the world. It was easier than looking up at Mikoto's face.

"Oh." It was all Mikoto had to say to that, and the two of them finished their lunch in silence. They brought their garbage to the garbage can and walked out into the hallway before Mikoto spoke up again. "So… what are you going to do about it?"

"I don't know…" Tooru sighed again, breathing out the weight of his problems with those three words. He wished he could say those other three words, the ones that would actually lift away the weight.

Yuujirou had spent the day after the karaoke night away from school. Partially because of the pounding headache, and partially because of the embarrassment he felt remembering what had happened the night before. Parts of it were blank, certainly. He knew that he had gotten up to sing multiple times, though thankfully the alcohol had chosen to erase those mortifying moments from his memory. How many people had been there? Four of his friends had come, yes, he knew that. Megumi had run into him and asked if she could join. Yuujirou didn't have the heart to turn her down, even knowing that her being there would mean that Mikoto would show up as well.

Someone else had been there, yes. Yuujirou remembered well. He had gone out for a little air, telling the guys he would be back in a little while. He had intended on buying a snack or something, he realized, something he couldn't get at the karaoke place. Then he had run into Tooru.

God, Tooru had looked so good. He was sexy, but he had also been cute, the way he blushed and was obviously embarrassed at being seen in women's clothes again. It made Yuujirou's face flush just thinking about it, so he did his best to not think about it when he went to classes the following days. He wouldn't look at Tooru, lest the image of him, with the close cut dress and the shimmering pink lips run rampant through his mind and cause an embarrassing situation.

Yuuijrou found he also had to think on what happened after the karaoke had ended. Tooru had left, he remembered, and the party started to end after that. Tori had left directly after Tooru, and Yuujirou had followed shortly after, not trusting his friend's intent. He liked Tori, he was a good guy, but he had a bit of a naughty streak that left Yuujirou worried for Tooru's purity.

So he followed them, yes he remembered that, and he got in between the two. What exactly had he done? It took Yuujirou a couple of days to sift through his memories and rearrange the distortion the alcohol had caused. When he realized exactly what he had done and said, it was three days later, in the middle of class, and Yuujirou groaned loudly and slammed his head on his desk. He used a stomachache as an excuse for the interruption, and retreated down to the nurse's office where he promptly got better.

Now the question he had to deal with was: did Tooru say what he thought he said, or was Yuujirou's perception mixing up the meaning of his words. 'You're drunk' he had said. It wasn't something like 'I don't want to kiss you' or 'Get the hell away from me, you pervert'. Did that mean Tooru wanted Yuujirou to kiss him, but only when he was sure Yuujirou was in his right mind?

He wanted to believe that was the case, but he wasn't sure. Often he found himself gnawing on his lip, though during lunch he had found a far more delicious substance in which to gnaw upon. He bought his lunch, so deep in thought he had forgotten which onigiri he wanted, and had ordered tuna instead of katsuobushi. He had glanced up once, to see Tooru getting up as though he was going to intercept Yuujirou, but he kept walking. Yuujirou had yet to decide what Tooru's meaning had been, and he did not want to face any further embarrassment by facing the blue haired boy now.

He sat down at the table, surrounded by fellow members of the soccer team, one of which had been at the karaoke night. He mentioned to Yuujirou that he should bring Tocchan over to play more often, and Yuujirou wondered why in the world he had forsaken his old friends in order to hang out with this crowd of leering perverts. Yuujirou merely responded with a swift under the table kick to the boy's shin, and continued eating his meal.

In the days that followed, Yuujirou still had yet to decide whether or not he should try to make his move again. Though he had decided to not go out and get drunk in his misery, like he had last time. It was what caused this whole thing, and now Yuujirou was sure Tooru didn't want to speak with him anymore. But he couldn't decide whether Tooru didn't want to speak to him anymore because he was angry that Yuujirou had tried to kiss him, or whether Tooru hadn't tried to kiss him again. It was a rather confusing loop that kept Yuujirou's mind spinning and unable to reach a conclusion.

At a soccer game, Yuujirou found the team playing against a neighboring school for the chance to secure a spot in a tournament. Yuujirou found himself not really caring that much. His mind was distracted, and during the breaks they got he found his eyes scouring the stands in the hopes of seeing a head of blue hair. After the fifth break, he saw Tooru sitting next to Mikoto and Akira, though he was far enough away that Yuujirou could only guess what his facial expression was. He assumed it to be blank, though he was sure Tooru would have a smile on. That's just how Tooru was, a smiling man.

In the following part of the game, Yuujirou tried to concentrate, he really did. But thoughts that had been plaguing him for the past days rose up against him and tugged at his mind. A cry from one of the Princesses cheering for them – Kazuto, Yuujirou thought it was – was the only warning he got, and Yuujirou turned around just in time to score a goal with his face.

He could hear the audience cheer at the lucky shot as Yuujirou fell to his knees, bringing one hand up to stem the flow of blood from his nose. His teammates hurried to his side, and one offered Yuujirou a handkerchief and support for his walk to the nurse's office. Yuujirou declined the support, though he pressed the handkerchief against his nostrils and trudged away from the field, to the nurse's office.

The nurse had, however, gone to the game and had failed to return to his office, not noticing that a player had been injured. Not that it mattered to Yuujirou, whose nose had stopped bleeding by the time he reached the infirmary. His head swam from the blood loss, so he chose to sit on a bed, leaning against the wall and waiting until someone came to fetch him.

The game was over soon, Yuujirou could tell from the cheers he heard even from the building. His golden eyes slid open at the sound, but closed soon after, only opening again when he heard footsteps coming closer mere minutes later.

His first thought was: Tooru! But no, he realized, as the door slid open to reveal Atsushi, still clad in a short nurse's dress. Of course it wouldn't be Tooru. That was too cliché, having the object of his affections visiting him in the infirmary where there would be an entire confession scene fully equipped with shojo bubbles.

"Are you feeling okay?" Atsushi asked, smiling at Yuujirou, who merely stared back.

"I'm fine." He said, making a show of flipping strands of hair away from his eyes without making his head spin from the weakness of blood loss. Atsushi smiled and went over to wet a cloth.

"That's good." He said, bringing the cloth over and sitting on the edge over the bed. "But your face is still all messy."

Yuujirou made a noncommittal grunt and took the wet cloth from Atsushi, dabbing away underneath his nose.

"You know, you're a lot less scary than you were at the beginning of the year." Atsushi said, smiling at Yuujirou, who merely gave him another grunt and continued cleaning his face. "Now you seem distracted, rather than anti-social. It's kinda cute."

"Look, I don't want-"

"I'll bet Tooru-kun's seen it too." Atsushi continued, ignoring whatever it was Yuujirou was going to say. His gaze now shifted from Yuujirou's face to the wall. "I wonder if he knows what it's about."

Yuujirou's face turned pink as he realized that this boy knew what he was talking about. He gave the side of Atsushi's face an icy gaze and brought the wet cloth away from his now clean face. "What is it you want?"

"Happiness." Atsushi said, without missing a beat. He turned to look at Yuujirou. "I love Tooru-kun, he is, like, my bestest friend! And he's not happy. So I watch. I watch him and I watch people around him, but I go and realize it's not the people around him I need to watch. You were once around him, but now you are not. I realize this is weird, so I chose to watch you. And then I learned." Atsushi took the wet, bloody cloth from Yuujirou's hands and placed it by the sink. He paused there, staring at the bloody cloth in silence.

"Learned what? What do you want me to do?" Yuujirou snapped at him, irritable.

"Love." Atsushi said simply, and turned to smile at Yuujirou again. "It is what I saw, it is what I want you to do. Tooru too. In face, everybody should love. I think I'll go love right now!" Before Yuujirou could protest that the boy was making no sense whatsoever, he merrily ran out of the room, heels clicking against the floor with each step.

The sun rose the next morning, just like it always did. Yuujirou looked out of his window, ignoring the soft snores of his roommate as he always did. He dressed and ate and got ready for school like it was any other day. But he didn't feel like it was any other day. The thoughts that had recently plagued his mind had cleared out, and he was left with only their residue: an action.

He made his way to the classroom, finding that most of the other classmates were already there. Yuujirou looked at them in silence, his gaze searching through them even as some of the guys asked him how his nose was. He stopped when his eyes came across the familiar blue head.

His heart beat too loudly in his chest, and he could have sworn he was breaking out into a sweat just walking over. But his eyes felt clearer than they had ever been, matching his mind. Yuujirou stepped in front of Tooru's desk, and the boy saw his shadow and looked up, surprised. Yuujirou was sure he was even more surprised when his lips met Yuujirou's.

His hands cupped both sides of Tooru's face, keeping it still when Yuujirou swiftly swept downward and pressed his lips against Tooru's. It lacked a magical air that hung between them in the moments before the kiss, when breath was ghosting over the other's lips and just the tips of their noses would touch. It lacked the white-hot intensity of a kiss that crushed lip against lip and sent blood rushing to areas that by all accounts should not be seen in public.

But what it did have was a gentle love, fearful of a rejection but sending silent passion through closed lips. Tooru could feel shockwaves radiating from his lips, making his fingertips quiver and his heart beat faster and faster. He closed his eyes and pressed his own lips back against Yuujirou's, his own hands gripping the folds of the other male's shirt as he felt the shockwaves rumbling through his insides, and with each rumble he could feel the void closing.

The classroom burst the magic that had enraptured Tooru and Yuujirou, and they started talking so loud that the distraction could not be ignored. Reluctantly, Yuujirou let go of Tooru's face and tugged his lips away. Tooru still clung to Yuujirou's shirt, looking up at him with glittering sapphire eyes and perfectly pink lips parted ever so slightly. Yuujirou had to resist the urge to jump him right then and there, and settled on giving him a soft smile.

"Sorry I took so long." Yuujirou said, pulling Tooru's hands off of his shirt so he could grasp them with his own hands.

"You're gonna have to pay for that, you ass." Tooru said wickedly, smiling almost maliciously up at Yuujirou, who merely smirked.

The teacher arrived and Yuujirou took his seat, gripping Tooru's hand for as long as they could get away with.

"Hey Tooru-kun, I heard a rumor that Yuuji – WOAH! HOLY FUCK!" Mikoto yelled, his arms flailing as he rounded a corner. Tooru had told him to meet up with him by the forest at four o'clock.

He was five minutes early.

Tooru's head spun around at the sound of Mikoto's voice, though the rest of his body couldn't go anywhere. It was currently pinned up against a tree by Yuujirou, who had buried his face in Tooru's neck and was in the process of marking up that creamy skin before Mikoto had to go and ruin the moment.

"Oh, hello, Mikoto-kun." Tooru said, smiling as though nothing was wrong. His embarrassed blush, however, betrayed that smile. Mikoto was currently in the blank-minded mode before the spazzing began, and he soon found himself pointing wildly at Tooru and Yuujirou.

"YOU! YOU ONLY GOT TOGETHER THIS MORNING AND YOU'RE ALREADY COMMITTING CARNAL ACTS IN PLAIN VIEW?! ANYONE CAN SEE YOU! AND WHAT IS WITH THAT?" Mikoto pointed at the frilly white dress Tooru was sporting. Tooru blushed.

"Well, I know I said I'd stop, but, you know…"

"It's kinky." Yuujirou stated, which caused Mikoto to almost foam at the mouth and loudly declare that he was not hanging out with them anymore and that no matter what reason Tooru called him out here, he was leaving. With his back finally out of sight, Yuujirou turned to Tooru again.

"He sure knows how to ruin a moment." Yuujirou said.

"Keep talking about him and you could ruin the moment too." Tooru warned, and Yuujirou smiled and gripped Tooru's lower back a little tighter, pulling the boy closer to him.

"So," Yuujirou started, leering up at Tooru. "How often can I see you like this?" His left hand slipped between the layers of Tooru's skirt.

"Once a week."

"Only once a week?"

"Can't have you getting too excited, now can we?" Tooru teased, leaning in close to Yuujirou, his minty fresh breath slipping over the male's lips.

"Darlin', every time I see you is enough to get me excited." Yuujirou said, closed his lips over Tooru's, and the two let the shockwaves wash over them, dancing across their skin, making their hair stand on end, as their lips danced around each other.