Before we begin the story, I just wanna say a few things. The small poem or whatever you like to call it which at the beginning of the chapter is written by me (It's stupid, I know). I encourage you to send me your reviews and critics about the story. Please send me your suggestions or anything that may have offended you. Send me reviews about anything please because I've REALLY worked hard on this chapter and would really appreciate the reviews. Anyway, enough of this boring stuff time to get on with the story!
-- Mikazuki Shinobu
My Opposite Me
Chapter: 1
Not a bit like a Girl
Could I still be someone else?
Would you want me if I'm not myself?
But I'll still need someone to shed some light
Some one to make things right
-- Mikazuki Shinobu
I knew I had to win this race. Everything about me depended on it and if I lost I just couldn't live with myself. This was the only way I could prove to them that I was as good as them. "On your mark!" a boy's voice rang out through the crowds of students that had gathered to watch. Most of them had betted that I would lose but I knew in the passing minutes I would prove them wrong.
I had to.
"Get set!" I started to feel my muscles pump up as I readied myself. I made my feet get a good grip on the ground. "Go Mikan!" I recognized Ruka's voice. Now the noise reduced as everyone watched intently. "Go!" the race started. I ran with all my strength, I felt my cap fall of my head and my hair fly all around me. I was winning! I felt like I was the queen – or to be more precise – the king of the world. Luck was finally on my side; I was triumphant! I could just imagine myself jeering at Makoto and all the other students would, of course, envy me. I could finally see the finishing line ahead of me. I really was going to win.
I risked a look back and knew at once it was a mistake; the guy behind me was gaining on me! And fast! I forced myself to run even faster but I slowly started to slow down as I felt my whole body scream at me to rest. I tried to ignore but I just couldn't. I looked at the grass next to the track field and felt tempted to go and lay on it. No! I had to win this; I just couldn't afford to lose. I regained my old speed and I heard as everyone around me started to scream……but not for me. Makoto had passed me and was nearing the finishing line and I knew at that moment all hope was lost. I was losing and Makoto was winning. "Mikan go on! You can do it!" a boy's shout cut through my thoughts. "I can do this! I will win!" I whispered to myself but I spoke too soon. Makoto had reached the finishing, "No!" the word escaped my mouth before I could stop it.
How could this happen? I was so close to winning. Now I couldn't go there……I couldn't face anyone right now. So, I did the only thing I could think of, I ran in the opposite direction to the only place where I knew I would feel safe, the Sakura tree. I ran hard biting my lower lip to stop the tears that threatened to spill. This wasn't the way things should have happened…to me. I bit my lip even harder to stop the tears and I rubbed my eyes. I looked up at it and sighed. I sat down and leaned my head against the trunk.
"At least you don't have to worry about anything." I said. I don't know why, but I liked to talk to the tree. Call me insane if you have to but this was the only place I could act like the girl I was. This was the only place I could act like myself and not be afraid of what the other people would be thinking. Suddenly all the tears I trapped inside started to gush out like a river and I started to tell all my woes to the tree. After awhile I started to hiccup, "T…hic…this isn't hic fair." I wailed.
"Hey tomboy." I recognized Kuro's teasing voice. I brought my knees up to my chest and buried my face in it. I felt him move towards me and lay a hand on my back. "Mikan?' he said in a gentle. "Are you ok?"
"Ok?" I shrieked, my brown hair tumbling down my face as I felt my body heat up with anger. "Do I look ok to you?" I said flailing my arms. "I've just been humiliated in front of the whole school and you come and ask me whether I'm ok."
"Mikan." He said softly. "Whatever it is, you always know you can tell me." He reached towards my wrist and pulled me down to sit next to him. I sat down without hesitation and started to tell about the race. He listened without interrupting until I reached the end. "Tell me then why did you race against him in the first place, hmm?" he raised an eyebrow at me. "Well, you see today he…I…" I tried to think of a good way to tell him what I was trying to say. I took a deep breath and prepared to tell about what happened.
Flashback:
Beads of sweat formed on my forehead as I tried to run as fast as I could to reach school. Mr. Ayumu would kill me if I was late; he said that there would be a really serious punishment if anyone reached school late. I could still remember the look on his face as he explained to us the rules about school on our first day. His face looked scary and threatening; I shivered at the thought of what he would do to me. I imagined the horrible stuff he would do to me.
I imagined myself wearing a pink dress with high heels while the whole class laughed at me but I quickly pushed that thought aside. Mr. Ayumu couldn't be that cruel could he? Sure, he glared at everyone in class if they made noise and sure he did look cruel which – in a weird sort of – way reminded me of Snape from Harry Potter. I looked down at my watch to make sure I wasn't already late.
7:30 a.m
Woah! 7:30 a.m? I slowed down to a walk, I've never been…… this early. Oh well, I'll just walk to school since I'm almost there anyway. I shrugged my backpack further onto my shoulders. I listened to the birds chirp as I walked; I felt so calm to listen to them. I mean, they looked so free to be who they were with no care in the world, they just sang on and on not bothered whether people thought it was ugly or beautiful which I think it would be really bad if somebody thought they're was song ugly. I gave a deep sigh and smiled to myself as I walked through the school gates. "Why couldn't I be like them so carefree, so happy, so….."
"Hey, lesbian."
I recognized that cocky voice and felt my temper rise but I forced myself to keep calm. I turned around to face, I shuddered , Makoto. Makoto was the type of guy most of the girls had a crush on. Most girls were attracted to his brown eyes which looked hazel in the sun and dark hair which he constantly kept combing which, by the way, irritated me. I mean, what type of guy keeps on combing his hair even in class. I felt so irritated at the sight of him. Girls thought he was sweet, cute, loving and generous but I thought of him as a stupid jerk with no care for other people, he was a fake.
"What do you want jerk?" I asked him and did not even try to disguise the irritation in my tone.
"Aww……come on," he poured honey all over his voice "That's no way to treat a friend."
"Friend?" I gave a snort at the thought of him being my friend. That would be the last thing….correction, the thing I would never be forever. I gave another snort. "Friend?" I repeated and put my bag down on the ground. "Now, since when have we been friends hmm? All you ever do to me is you ruin my life!" I couldn't help but scream at him.
"True." He said calmly. I stared at him in disbelief. First he calls me a lesbian, then he calls himself my friend and now he's agreeing to what I'm saying. This is truly unbelievable, I must be dreaming. I pinched myself, nope, that hurt.
This is reality! Ooook, so will the real Makoto stand up, please.
"You know, I've heard quite a few things about you Mikan."
"What did you hear?" I raised an eyebrow.
"Oh nothing much," he began but I started to leave. I've had enough of him. "Except that you and Daiki have been, how should I say this? Making out?" My head whipped around to him and I glared at him. "Daiki?" I said the name slowly and precisely. Makoto gave me a satisfied smile, "Yes, Daiki." He said in a rather irritating tone and that's when my nerves snapped. "Who the hell is he?" I shouted. "No one just the person you kissed." he said
"What?!" I flailed my arms. I would never kiss guy and now Makoto's saying, I kissed a guy! I mean guys, no offence, are so undesirable to me. Sure they're really good for friends but to me they're not good life partners. I mean, I don't even know who the heck Daiki is! That's when it hit me, Makoto, he was setting me up for another one of his crazy scams. My hands slowly formed into fists and my feet dug into the ground. "Ok, Makoto, what's your plan this time? Huh?" I asked and prayed with all my might that it wouldn't be something girly. "Oh, nothing much."
"What are you talking about?" I said hoping my temper would stay calm for another minute or so.
"You know exactly what I'm talking about."
"Don't. you. dare." But he just smirked at me. That's it I couldn't take anymore. I've handled his teases, his insults and taunt for almost four years now but this was so idiotic. I dug my feet into the ground and lashed out my fists at him but he caught my hand and twisted it behind my back. I gave out a gasp of pain.
"Let go of me." I hissed.
"You girls are so vulnerable" he said. "Girls are not as vulnerable as you think we are." I started to struggle but his grip was tight and firm. "Yeah, right. I've already got proof of your vulnerability but you have none." He turned me around and looked into my eyes.
"Shut up" I hissed at him
I could see he was enjoying himself…very much. "Shut up!" I shouted at him and sent my knee in to his stomach which sent him sprawling on the floor. "You want proof? Fine, I'll give you proof! Meet me after school at the race track." I picked up my bag and walked away without looking back.
End of Flashback
"Well, from my point of view I think it was your fault." He said
"My fault?" I stared at him open mouthed.
"Remember, you were the one who challenged him not the other way around and close your mouth. It's deuced unattractive, gaping like that." He put his hand under my chin and closed my mouth.
"But he was annoying me!" I stood up and looked down at him
"True, but you should have thought before you acted and besides try to enjoy the summer vacation." He said
I sat down beside him again deep in thought. "Then, at least do me a favor, will you?" I looked up at him.
"What is it?"
"Help me be a boy."
Later that Night:
I sat in front of my dresser after my shower and looked at my long brown hair. I took my brush and started to comb but then I put back down as I looked at my reflection. "Why do I even bother?" I looked at my big brown eyes, my hands which were always clumsy and my face which looked more like the delicate creature I was than any boy.
"Hey sweetie!" my mom popped her head through the door.
"Hey, mom." I faked a smile at her but that didn't fool her. She knew what was going on.
"How's my little cherry, today?" she asked as she sat down beside me and started to stroke my head. That was my dad's nickname for me.
"My day makes the Jurassic Park look like heaven." I said as I buried my face in my pillow.
"Come on, it couldn't be that bad?"
"Nope, its worse." I sat up straight next to her.
"Wanna tell me about it?"
"Not yet. Not until I've dealt with it." I said and sat quietly thinking.
"You know," my mom began. "Your brother wants to join the Clash of the Band but you know that I always send him to that Summer Camp. If I send him to that Band thing he'll miss out on his camp which, of course, I wouldn't want. Boys, really become boys at that camp! What do you think I should do?"
That's when it hit me! "Of course!" I shouted loudly which made my mom jump. "Why didn't I think of it before? Mom, you're a genius." My mom looked at me like I had gone mad.
"Me? Oh, why thank you but……" I was already out of the room and out of hearing. I rushed to the phone, picked it up and punched in the numbers as quickly as I could. I could hear the phone ring. "Come on, come on." I slowly whispered.
Finally someone picked up the phone.
"Hello?" a sleepy voice asked.
"Umm……Is Hotaru there?"
"Sorry," the voice yawned "No Hotaru." The voice drawled and the line went dead. This time I dialed the numbers carefully and as slowly as possible. My fingers trembled as excitement threatened to burst. The phone rang again. "Please, please. Hotaru" I whispered urgently.
"Hello?" Hotaru's voice came through the other end.
"Hotaru!" I squealed. I heard Hotaru sigh.
"Yes?"
"I've got good news! Now listen to my idea!"
Next Morning:
Hotaru and Kuro sat on the couch while I sat on the floor. Mom had already left after telling us that she'd be back late and we were not to wait for her. I had already told my plan to Kuro and I was beaming at him, Hotaru's unwavering amethyst eyes wore a bored expression and Kuro looked shock not happy as I had planned. "Are you sure about this?" Kuro asked his face filled with doubt.
"Yeah, I mean how hard could it be?"
"Can we go over the plan once again?" Hotaru groaned while I gave a deep sigh and prepared to say the plan the hundredth time! Ok, ok so maybe it ain't the hundredth time! I'm just tired of repeating the same thing over and over and over again!
"Ok, look." I said through clenched teeth. "I go to your summer camp and pretend to be you and you get to stay away from it and as I stay there I get to be a boy."
Kuro stayed quiet for a while and thought. Silence enveloped the whole room except for the sound of the clock ticking. My heart was beating so loud that I swear Kuro and Hotaru could hear it. Finally Kuro broke the silence. "Oook but where can I stay? Mom is bound to find me in a neighborhood this small and what about you? You can't just go away like that?"
"Oh don't worry! Hotaru and I got it all figured out, silly. I'll just tell mom that I'm off to the Clash of the Bands while it will be you who's actually going there while I'm at the camp"
"Woah! Backtrack there, did you just say Clash of the bands?!"
I got up and sat down next to him and put a hand around his shoulders. "Yup, you've got it right." I could see the flicker of amusement in Hotaru's eyes as she produced an envelope. Kuro grabbed it and ripped it open and gasped in amazement mouth wide open. "What the hell?! You got this for me?" Kuro stared at the piece of paper in his hand. It was the approval paper for Kuro and his band to play at the Clash of the Bands.
"No," Hotaru replied calmly "we got it for my dead dog."
Suddenly Kuro became serious "But where did you get this from?"
"Let me see, remember your band? Well they sent in your registration and a video of the Fallen Thorns playing." Kuro belonged to a band called the Fallen Thorns. Kuro played the electric guitar and sometimes the vocalist, Ruka was the drummer, Yori was the acoustic guitarist and Mariko played the keyboard and piano. Sometimes I sang but not frequently. Anyway, back to the present. "And you got in. End of story! So, what do you say?" I asked him.
"When do I leave?"
"You and I leave tomorrow."
"Ok, I'll do it."
"Really?" I hugged him tightly until he was gasping for air.
"Mikan, you might wanna let go of me."
"Oh, right." I let go and thought for a while. "So you wanna do a little shopping?" I smiled as Kuro and Hotaru stared at me in disbelief.
"Did you just say shopping?" Hotaru asked and I nodded. "The world's about to end." Hotaru fell back on the couch.
(Sometime later……)
I was sitting on a large saloon chair and stared at my reflection in the mirror. I poked out my tongue at myself and smiled. Hotaru and Kuro had gone in to one of the rooms to choose a wig for me. Hotaru had first suggested that I bald myself but no way that would happen!
Not my precious hair!
I imagined myself entering the camp and playing all the games the guys play. At the end of the camp I would be a full pledged boy and I would leave without anyone knowing I was girl. Easy peasy! A vision of me racing Makoto and winning popped into my head. I could already hear the crowd cheering my name. "Mikan! Mikan! Mikan….."
"Mikan!" Hotaru's voice brought me back to reality.
"Huh?" I looked up at her.
"Why were you smiling like a mad person at the mirror? Look, you've already scared a lady out the saloon." Hotaru pointed at a lady who hurriedly grabbed her bag and rushed out of the saloon. "Not my fault." I shrugged. "So what have you got for me?"
'There weren't many wigs that looked like my hair" Kuro explained "but this was the closest." Hotaru wrapped my hair in one of those hair caps and Kuro put the wig on my head. "Wow," Hotaru exclaimed "you two look alike." I stood next to Kuro and I had to agree we did look alike. "That's because we're twins, Hotaru." Kuro snickered but Hotaru had a comeback ready.
"Oh, I didn't know a brainless bimbo could be related to a baka." Hotaru replied calmly
"Hey!"
Ten minutes later, after we had bought the wig, Kuro, Hotaru and I sat in one of the cafés. Hotaru quietly sipped her coffee her eyes fixed on the sunset, Kuro just picked his cake with his fork and I was sipping my juice quietly thinking. "Mikan, I'm going now. I'll see you two at home right?"
"Yeah, sure."
"Ok, good. Now I've got to go." Kuro got up, left some money on the table and left before we even had a chance to ask where.
Typical Kuro……
"So, what do you wanna do next?" I asked Hotaru.
"Nothing."
"Music? Walk?" I suggested hoping she'd do something exciting.
"Nothing." She repeated. She sipped the last of her drink and pushed her chair back. "Let's go Mikan." "Sure." I got up from my chair and Hotaru and I left the shop to be met by a familiar yet irritating face.
Luna Koizumi.
She was wearing a pink mini skirt, white tube top and black high heels; silver bangles on each wrist and sunglasses atop of her blond hair. Two of her attendant – oops, I mean girlfriends – were with her carrying shopping bags on each arm.
Seriously, I didn't know what guys saw in her with her overly tanned skin and rotten behavior. I mean just because guys totally fall at her feet, Luna thinks she's the Mistress of the World.
In your dreams, Luna!
"So, finally couldn't resist yourself huh?"
I scowled at her. "What do you want, Luna?"
Luna ignored that and continued with her talk. "It's really odd to see you out shopping." She sneered. "Tired of you hand me downs I guess." She sighed and fanned herself dramatically. Her girls snickered.
Typical……
"You know what, Luna? After all these years, I'm going to come out now. You've got real guts, I can tell you that and you've also got some bitchy behavior there. Makes me think of sewer rats." Luna gasped and I rejoiced inside.
Childish, I know.
But when you've known Luna as long as I have you'll agree with I've just said. "You know what Mikan let me tell you something too." She pointed a neatly manicured finger at me. "You are much lower than sewer rats or even the sewer. You're one of those girls going about pretending to be some one else when she's actually ruining her family's pride by thinking that once she acts like a boy everything would be fixed and tarnishing her mother's name. With everything you've done I bet your father's turning in his grave, Mikan Sakura." She hissed my name.
That's when my hand lashed out and I hit her straight on the cheek with a loud smack. Luna staggered back and her fan girls – or whatever you call those toads – caught her dropping their shopping bags. Everything around me was gone, I didn't care if other people were watching, Luna had mentioned my father and that was the last straw. Once she mentioned him every calmness inside of me just snapped. I glared at her and pointed an accusing finger at her. "Don't you dare mention my father, again." I hissed. With that I walked away with Hotaru.
(Back at Home……)
I sat at the kitchen table; a piece of chicken leg in front of me. "You know, Mikan you just can't stare at that chicken, it's meant for eating."
I glared at Kuro and he winced.
I grabbed the chicken, sank my teeth into it and started it like one of those Vikings you see on TV.
"Luna." I said through mouthful of chicken.
"Idiotic Luna." I continued
"Mentioning my father like that." I hissed.
"How dare she mention my father like that!?" I shouted slamming the chicken leg on the table which mad Kuro jump. "Who the hell does she think she is?! Huh?"
"Mikan!" Hotaru shouted from the couch "Shut up! I'm trying to watch this damn movie, you idiot. Now shut up!"
I stomped towards the couch, grabbed the remote from Hotaru and switched off the TV. "Is that all you care about? That damn movie? When Luna's just mentioned my father." I felt a hot tear slide down my cheek and I didn't bother to wipe it.
"Do you remember what Luna said?"
Hotaru nodded.
You're one of those girls going about pretending to be some one else when she's actually ruining her family's pride by thinking that once she acts like a boy everything would be fixed and tarnishing her mother's name. With everything you've done I bet your father's turning in his grave, Mikan Sakura. That's what Luna had said.
"Now tell me Hotaru, if acting like a boy would bring back everything then I wan my father back. I want him, Hotaru." I knew saying this was silly or even naïve but the pain was too much too handle especially after what Luna said. Tears were flowing down my cheek and I collapsed on the floor crying. Hotaru wrapped her arms around me and sat down next to me.
"It can't bring back dad, Mikan." Kuro said. I looked at him through tear filled eyes then buried my face in Hotaru's shoulder and cried silently.
/ My Opposite Me \
I didn't know why I had talked myself into this. I mean, every single part in me was tingling and there were butterflies in my stomach. Kuro was at the front driving while Hotaru sat next to me. I was already wearing the wig, one of Kuro's jeans and a loose shirt to hide my breasts.
"Hotaru, I feel funny." I whined.
Hotaru looked at me and gifted me with a knock on the head. "Get a grip, Mikan. We'll be there soon. Look we're already there." Hotaru pointed. I looked out through the window; there was a sign that read 'PurpleMoon Camp'. We passed the sign and I saw a couple of long camp houses – reminded me of the dorm – , a lake and the campers with their things; standing around and talking with each other, laughing or just simply being shy. We got out of the car and I breathed in the fresh air of nature. I took out my bag and Kuro went to open the trunk. "What are you taking?" I asked curiously.
"Hotaru's bag." He muttered.
"Hotaru's bag?" I repeated
"Yeah, I'm gonna be staying with you but its more like keeping an eye on you." Hotaru answered taking a purple bag from the trunk.
"Look you guys, there's no need for anyone to take care of me. I can take care of myself." I said slowly and distinctively.
Hotaru turned to Kuro, "I told you she wouldn't agree. It's just a waste of your money Kuro and my time."
As soon as Hotaru finished her sentence, a sleek white stopped next to ours. The door opened and a young guy stepped out. He had a well built body, blond hair and his eyes…his eyes were really the most attract – scratch that part off; what I meant is that his eyes are coolest part of him. He was smiling like everything was wonderful in life, I must have been staring because he looked towards me and came over.
"Hi." His voice sounded like it belonged in a movie and I was hooked not like the 'in love' hooked or anything but the 'I would really love to be your friend' type of hooked. "H-hi" I said totally hypnotized his eyes and felt a jab in my ribs.
"Use your guy voice." Hotaru whispered in my ear.
"Oh," I cleared my throat. "I mean hi" I smiled back.
"So, you new here?"
"Yeah"
"Cool, me too! I'm Ruka Nogi, by the way." I stared at him. Oh, God! I didn't have a name. "M-my name is uh……Riku……"
"Shinobi. His name is Riku Shinobi." Hotaru came to my rescue.
"And who's this pretty lady? Is she your girlfriend Riku?" Ruka asked.
"Who? Hotaru? You've got to be kidding me!" I laughed. "I wouldn't date her for a million dollars." I said which was a mistake. I felt an aura of evil emitting from Hotaru and before I knew it I was on my back. Do not ask me what happened, I don't know. I got up and dusted myself. "I'm Hotaru Imai and these are my two friends," Hotaru stressed on the word 'friends' "Kuro and Riku, nice to meet you Ruka." Hotaru said in an – I shuddered – kind voice!
Totally creepy!
"Mr. Ruka we've got to go!" A man shouted. Ruka nodded and gave one of his million dollar smile. "I've got to go, see you guys around." He ran off. Hotaru turned towards us and said the most unbelievable thing she had ever said, "I'm coming."
"And why? May I know? Surely it's not because of Mr. Ruka Nogi, hmm…"
"Shut up, Kuro. Now go."
"Sure, sure." Kuro backed away with his usual goofy smile glued on his face. I smiled, "Thanks a lot, Kuro." I gave him a small kiss on the cheek. I smiled again but looked horrified. "Mikan," he whispered "I don't think you shouldn't have done that."
"Why not? A sis can give her brother a kiss can't she?"
"Yeah, but you're a guy." I turned around and everyone was looking at me. Everything was so silent that I swear I could hear the crickets.
"What?!" I finally shouted and they all went back to their work.
"We're off to a bad start here." Hotaru sighed and shook her head.
(That night…)
Finally after, Kuro had left and Hotaru had gone to her room which she shared. I had been correct about the cabin; it did look like a dorm. Anyway, I was already in my room or cabin and my room mate hadn't come yet.
Good.
I could remove the cloth around my chest but the wig had to be on, just in case. Tomorrow morning, the campers would have the full day to make friends and know each other and during the night we'd have a campout. Of course, there would be girls; I hoped that none of them would recognize me to be a girl. I sighed and finally changed into my pajamas. I lay down on the bed and pulled the covers up to my cheek. I wouldn't want my room mate to see anything, now would I? I fell asleep immediately dreaming about my time here.
Oh god, would it be awesome!
/ My Opposite Me \
The next morning I woke up early. I felt so fresh and happy, must be Mother Nature working her way through me. I turned to my side and found myself facing my roommate. He had raven black hair with his bangs covering his face; he was sleeping with only his jeans on and his chest bare. I stared at him; he looked so……so handsome!
Woah! Wait did I just say handsome? No way, man! I must have meant to say stupid.
Suddenly the guy opened his eyes and I stared into them. They were the unusual shade ever, his eyes were crimson and they were so damn sexy!
"What the hell are you staring at me for?" his voice startled me. It reminded me of some kind of person who didn't want anyone in this world; made me think of the beast from 'Beauty and the Beast'.
Little did I know I was staring face to face to this world's beast!