Summary: Captured by Voldemort, Harry lies his hopes on a God that doesn't seem to be listening. Maybe God isn't real, but that doesn't stop miracles from happening. Naruto Xover Eventual HP/Dei Naru/Ita

Warnings: Yaoi, character death, self-harm, gore, violence, language

Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me. If they did, why would I being writing this?? So don't sue.

A/N: The prologue, this chapter, will be the only diary entry chapter. The rest will be third person. Harry and his new friends will be getting to the wizarding world eventually, though the story will be mainly in Japan (Naru-kun's world) and the trip to the wizarding world will be just a short visit. The title sucks, I know.

Kami-sama

Prologue

July 21, 1997

I bought this diary to keep track in the war but only now do I actually start using it. Well I guess I'll start with the basics. My name's Harry Potter. I'm sixteen years old and I'm trapped in Voldemort's dungeons along with several members of the Order of the Pheonix. Of course, I'm not in the same cell as the rest. My accommodations are… fit for the boy-who-lived, so to speak.

The only reason I'm writing in this diary is because it happened to be in my pocket when I was kidnapped two days ago, along with a muggle pen. I need something to do in this dingy little cell, if you could call it even that, and I found this calms me.

Right now I'm listening to my friends screams as they get tortured and whatnot by Voldemort's followers. Dumbledore has shown no inclination of helping us and it seems that only God could help us now.

God. What an amusing thing to say. I honestly can say that he probably is the only person that could help us now, even if Dumbledore tried. I just wish he would hurry up and create a miracle.

The Death Eaters are coming over here. I must hide this lest they take it away.

July 23, 1997

They've put Ron and Hermione in a cell across the room. Through the bars, I can now see every torture as it happens. I found out a very gruesome fact. I can still hear Hermione's screams as she gets raped again and again by some random Death Eater. Ron tries to comfort her, but by now I think it's too late. She may very well be insane or becoming so.

They have yet to touch me and I thank God for that everyday as well as begging him for forgiveness for whatever we have done. I beg for him to let us out unharmed or to kill us quickly, but as of yet my prayers have not been answered. I'm sure he'll answer them soon. After all, he loves all his children and is very forgiving.

Hermione is screaming in her sleep again. I must help Ron comfort her. I'll write again as soon as I get the chance.

July 31, 1997

Oh my God! They've finally done it! They've killed Remus! And for a birthday present they threw his corpse in here with me. I can't sleep. I can't eat. I can't even breath from the stench of rotting flesh. I can't take it! I want to die, God kill me! Though I've managed not to cry before this, I can't help but cry for Remus. Oh God. Please help me! Please save me from this hell!

August 13, 1997

Remus's corpse is still here, but there's another body in here as well. Mundungus Fletcher's in here too. I don't know why I'm so calm about it. Maybe I'm getting used to the killing and death? I don't know, but I feel numb. It's like there's no emotion on my face. Ron even tried to joke that it looked like I was trying to imitate Malfoy. I didn't say anything back.

And I can't talk. I had screamed so much when they brought in Moony that apparently my vocal cords are shredded. I don't care. It's not like I'd be using them any time soon anyway.

It stinks in here. The smell has gotten so much worse. The whole cell reeks of death and rotting flesh. I wish I went blind instead of mute. Rats have started nibbling bits and pieces off Remus and his flesh was turning a nasty color. One of his eyes were missing, I suspect rats, but the other one keeps staring at me, unblinking. I want to go over there and close the eye, but I don't have the strength nor will to do so. Even numb, I can't bare to even glance over there any longer.

God, aren't you listening? Please answer my prayers. I'll be good now. I promise. Please… aren't you even there?

August 15, 1997

Hermione's dead. She had stopped eating a few days ago and she died sometime last night. Ron's shed his tears for her, but I'm afraid I don't have anymore to shed. Sorry 'Mione.

Poor Hermione. At least that's the end of her suffering.

C'mon God! Listen damn it! Won't you please get off your lazy ass and help what's left of us?!

August 28, 1997

The Death Eaters have been taunting me. They tell me of how Dumbledore wasn't going to save my ass and that Voldemort was going to have it. I knew what they meant, but I didn't react. I don't react too much anymore. It's like nothing matters, like I'm trapped in my mind but I'm well aware of what's going on. I could react if I wanted, but I'm fine living in a world of nothing.

God… please?

September 1, 1997

Oh God, he's coming. Voldemort's coming and God can' t stop him from having me now.

A/N: I think this turned out okay. What did you think? Please review!!