Melee Academy of Higher Learning for Boys
Year Three
-One-
Young Link grumbled as he stared as his reflection in the mirror, holding two ends of his uniform tie and wondering how one was to tie such a thing. His first day of high school, a big deal to Zelda, who actually cried about it the night before because he was "growing up so fast" or some other sappy thing. At least he was taking Ness and Popo with him to hell.
"Oh, the Academy isn't that bad," Link chided, ruffling Young Link's hair as he looked in the mirror as well. "It can be hell on earth as a freshman, but..."
Link turned Young Link around, grabbed the tie out of his thirteen year old 'brother's' hands, and tied it himself, all the while Young Link sulked at the loss of his no-uniform days at the grammar school.
"It still sucks," Young Link said, crossing his arms as Link smoothed out the wrinkles in his shirt. "Now I'm gonna become you."
His older self cupped his cheek and gave him a reassuring smile. "Let me give you some advice, something that Roy will probably reiterate later. If you can help it, become the complete opposite of your dipshit failure of an older self."
Young Link reached for the blazer hanging from a hook on the closet door and tried it on. A perfect fit, but that would make sense since it was Link's blazer from freshman year - he was around the same size then.
Roy stuck his head in the doorway, buttoning his shirt cuffs, which were sticking out from his blazer sleeves. He needed to remind Marth to give him his old blazer. "You ready yet? We can't spend all morning up here." Hanging off his arm from the laces were his ratty old Converse, one of the shoelaces drastically shorter than the other side, making it hard to lace up.
"Young Link's just making sure he's ready to give up his childhood innocence and enter high school," Link said. "We'll be right down. And do something with your hair, Roy - you look like a girl."
Roy stuck his tongue out and disappeared beyond the doorway. Just because his hair was almost shoulder length (after he cut it two weeks prior), didn't mean he looked like a girl. Link should be the one to talk since his hair was definitely not shoulder length.
"Marth, I need money for lunch!" Roy called down the stairs, leaning precariously over the wooden banister of the second floor.
"Then hurry the hell up and get it already!" Marth called from the kitchen doorway, glasses perched haphazardly on his nose, newspaper in hand. He looked like he just got back from a nice vacation and thrown into Hell.
Roy sighed and nearly collided with Link and his younger self.
"Are first days usually this hectic?" Young Link asked. "I don't remember there being this much commotion."
Link led Young Link downstairs and into the kitchen, which looked like a war zone. And no wonder, since it seemed like Bowser and Mario were trying to see who could kill the other first with pancake mix. The floors, the walls, even the walkway outside was covered in the stuff, as were the mutated turtle and the Italian plumber. Roy walked past all the carnage to where his boyfriend was sitting, as usual, reading the newspaper. The front page headline was "Public And Private Clash In Epic Battle", with a picture of Master Hand and Tabuu underneath it, both engaged in what appeared to be a wrestling match.
"The first floor is always this hectic at this time of day, YL. You'll have to get used to it, especially with more people here," Ness quipped from his seat next to Mewtwo.
"I remember Peach making breakfast, Zelda feeding Pichu, and Marth reading the newspaper every morning, but not pancake wars, Snake sneaking around the yard in a cardboard box, or all sorts of things breaking."
Link patted Young Link's arm, practically pinning the poor kid to his side, like an overprotective mother with her son on the first day of kindergarten.
"Lunch money, Marthy," Roy said, grabbing one of the few chairs at the kitchen table not covered in flour.
Marth shifted in his seat to remove his wallet from his back pocket; he flicked it open and gave Roy a few bills before closing it and replacing it back to his pocket. Roy took the cash and gave Marth a peck on the mouth.
"Thank you, Marth."
Lucas, who just came through the back door and ducked from oncoming pancake mix, watched an innocent peck on the mouth turn into a make-out session. Ness noticed his friend and beckoned him to sit down at the table, seemingly oblivious to Roy practically throwing Marth down onto the kitchen floor.
"Are they always like this?" Lucas whispered. "I mean, yeah, it's nothing strange since a girl and guy are supposed to be romantic with each other, but...at the breakfast table? Don't Marth and Roy realise that that's not...proper?"
"Yep," Ness replied, going over his supplies list for the hundredth time that day. He did a double-take when he heard 'a girl and guy' and 'Marth and Roy' in the same sentence. Or nearly the same sentence. In any case, Lucas was referring to Marth and Roy using incorrect pronouns.
"Wait a minute, Luc," Ness said, looking up from his list. "Marth and Roy are both guys."
Bowser cursing Mario's mother, punctuated by pancake mix hitting the wall behind the plumber, kept the kitchen from being completely silent.
"Are you sure that Marth person is a guy?" Lucas asked after a long pause.
Ness nodded, his face completely serious. "You're not the first to mistake him for a woman."
"But..." Lucas knew that the argument was moot now, but he wasn't going to back down just yet. "But...he sounds like a girl."
Before Ness could say anything more, he was interrupted by Link.
"Come on, guys, let's go!" he shouted over the calamity in the kitchen. "Don't wanna be late for your big day, do you?"
Young Link reluctantly followed his older self through the back door, Ness, Lucas, and Popo not far behind him.
"Come on, Roy!" Link called, poking his head back into the doorway. "Marth'll be here when you come home, you know."
Roy frowned and clung to Marth's arm. "I'm still afraid of being around you without him around." As if to make his point clear, he gave Marth's arm a tiny tug.
Link crossed his arms. "You and I won't be alone ever again now that YL's a freshman. I'll be watching over him like a hawk."
That didn't reassure Roy any.
Marth kissed Roy's forehead and ruffled his hair. "I already gave Link a talking to last night. And he's right - I'll be waiting for you to come home, all right?"
"Promise?" Roy didn't know how childish he was sounding.
"On my honour," Marth replied, kissing the back of Roy's hand. "Now go before you're late. I'm not signing your tardy slips, either."
Link had to practically drag the Pheraean away from Marth, but not before Roy gave Marth one last kiss on the cheek. With a final tug, Roy was dragged out of the Manse and down the back steps, the freshmen not too far away from them.
"It's gonna be so awkward not having Marth there, though," Roy remarked. "I'm...I'm not sure I can stand it."
Link rolled his eyes. "Roy. Get over it. You still have me, and you have Young Link now, too. And he'll be sitting there at the Manse after a long day at work, you'll come home from school, and then you can cuddle or whatever. It won't change too much."
"He'll come home and complain about how many people don't know sword polish from their elbow," Roy joked, grinning now.
"Better than him saying, 'I don't know why I still work at the stupid lingerie store'."
And so, with the group of thirteen year olds in tow - Lucas straggling a little behind because he wasn't too fond of groups - they continued their trudge down the gravel-lined driveway to the litter-filled streets. Nintendo Land wasn't known for its cleanliness.
"Why do I even have to go to the Academy, anyway?" Young Link wondered aloud as they neared the corner of the street.
"Because Zelda wants you to have an education," Link replied.
"But I'll learn all this crap that I won't ever need..."
"Life's like that," Roy chimed in. "Get used to it, Young Link."
"Welcome to the real world, I'm your host, Link. And reality's a real bitch."
If it was one thing Link was good at, it was making a joke out of any situation. That was probably what compelled Roy to converse with him the first time he arrived at the Manse. Or maybe it was because Link looked not like others in the Manse. One or the other - Roy really didn't remember.
-x-
"Can you believe we're juniors already?" Roy asked as they walked through the all-too-familiar front doors of the Academy.
"Technically, I'm still a sophomore," Link confessed. "Because of my credits."
"Well yeah, but you're still a junior. And you're taking Geometry, finally, so that's a good thing."
Young Link tugged on Link's sleeve, a slightly scared look in his eyes.
"What is it?" Link asked, stopping in front of the auditorium, Roy not too far ahead. "You look like Epona did when Ganondorf was chasing after us."
Young Link gulped and looked all around. "...How do I know where my homeroom is? What if I have to change something on my schedule? Oh Nayru, what if they ask about my ID? I didn't even get it yet--"
"Young Link, calm yourself." Link came down to his younger self's eye level, his hands on his shoulders. "Your homeroom is posted on one of the lists in this doughnut-shaped hallway. There's a big sign above them that says 'Freshmen', and it's in reverse alphabetical order. Schedule changes are done the first full week of school by appointment-only. And all freshmen get their IDs today, so don't worry about it. They'll give you a temp. instead."
"Where the heck are the homeroom postings for freshmen?" Popo shouted. "This is so confusing!"
"There's too many people!" Lucas cried, hiding behind Ness.
Link didn't remember there being such a commotion over homeroom postings when he was a freshman.
"They're right there," Roy answered, pointing to the board by the guidance suite. "Says 'Freshmen' right there." He tapped Link's shoulder then as more people filtered into the front hall.
"You're gonna be fine," Link said, smiling. "You have my cell in case you have questions, Roy's too. And Marth's, though I'm not sure how much help he'd be." He stood and pushed Young Link to where Popo, Ness and Lucas were.
"Have fun!" Roy shouted behind them as they started to walk over to the other side of the floor. He squeezed Link's shoulder to comfort him, for Link looked like someone ran over his hamster.
"He'll be okay," Roy comforted, keeping his eye out for the junior class list all the while. "You worry too much."
They stopped over by the Practical Biology classrooms and there, right before their eyes, was the homeroom roster.
"This should be fun," Roy remarked, scanning the five sheets taped to the drywall. "Trying to find our names is like trying to find a needle in a haystack." It didn't help that there were several people crowding around the stupid list, either. It didn't even look like they were searching for their names, just milling about, and being a pain in the arse all the while.
"Aha!" Roy whooped and wrote his new homeroom number - 406 - on the palm of his hand. "Hey Linky! We're in the same homeroom this year!"
Link came over to see the list, and sure enough they were. "Sweet!"
Somehow, Link almost got knocked out by some kid with wings sticking out of his blazer, and Roy almost got knocked over by a tall and very blue haired youth with a bandanna tied around his head.
"Well that was lovely," Link said, rubbing his face. "Just what I expect every morning."
"They're probably the transfers from Brawl High's merging with here," Roy replied, massaging his shoulder. "I've never seen them around here before."
"Wouldn't kill them to say 'Excuse me' or something," Link muttered. He looked at the clock on his Nintenpod and wheezed. Then he realised it was in the wrong time zone and switched it to the correct one.
"We have ten minutes," Link said, double checking. "Well, nine now. I can't believe I spazzed for a whole minute--"
"We should go to homeroom then." Roy tried to think of the quickest way to get to their homeroom, but Link grabbed his arm and dragged him off to where the guidance suite was located.
Scanning the list of freshmen when they arrived, Link tapped the page and then muttered "two seventy en" to himself before running back in the direction they came.
"Where are we going?" Roy asked, nearly bumping into a group of burly-looking seniors as they made their way to the second floor tunnel. "Our homeroom's that way--"
"I'm gonna check on YL one more time before--"
"Will you stop worrying about him so damn much? You're acting like my retainer back in Pherae!"
They zipped around the corner and past two classrooms before arriving at Link's destination - 217N, their old sophomore accelerated English classroom.
Link poked his head through the door and saw his younger self sitting in the far corner, his head in his hands with the boredest expression possible. Everyone else was congregated on the nearest side of the classroom, chatting away to old friends, people extending the hand of friendship to those they didn't know... And yet there Young Link was, all by himself.
Roy poked his head through the door as well, over Link's since he was taller than the blond.
"He's by himself," Link observed.
"So? He'll find friends, I'm sure."
"But...But I don't want him to be just like I was on the first day," Link argued.
Link clutched his messenger bag in his arms for dear life as he entered the classroom filled with unfamiliar faces. They probably thought he was a freak because of his ears, which stuck out like sore thumbs on the hands of a clumsy carpenter. He slid into a seat by the window, away from the stares, away from the comments. Why was Zelda putting him through this? Besides, the two boys he befriended two weeks before weren't there in his homeroom - he was essentially alone.
"Do you realise how often we have Administrative Stations?" Roy asked, snapping Link out of his reverie. "Almost never. So don't worry about him being alone. Ness and the others are probably in at least one of his regular classes."
Link withdrew his head from the classroom, Roy following suit.
"He signed up for Chorus," Link commented. "So he'll know us at least."
"Providing he's in our period, yeah. But don't worry about it. I know I didn't."
"But you at least look human. I mean, you don't look part dragon even though you are. Young Link's ears stick out because he's Hylian."
So that was what Link was worrying about - how people would perceive Young Link based on what he looked like.
"...I'm a quarter Ice Dragon, so of course it wouldn't show. And even if it did, I would still look human for the most part. And I doubt anyone gives a damn, Link. Now c'mon, we should go before the bell--"
The bell rang. The Melee Academy of Higher Learning for Boys was officially open for...schooling. At least, that was what Master Hand always said it was for, and that was what Tabuu told them yesterday. Roy wanted to know how they would get screwed over this year.
"How much do you want to bet Bowser and Ganondorf are gonna string someone up on the flagpole?" Roy asked as they continued on to their homeroom, located on the fourth floor.
"A hundred rupees," Link answered, hands in his pockets.
"In Nintendo Land currency, that would be...?"
Link sighed. Being in Hyrule for a month made him forget about the differing currencies. "About fifty bucks."
"You're making me bet my lunch money on it?"
Link stopped just short of their homeroom and nearly got knocked over by a burly senior. "Marth gave you fifty dollars for lunch?" Disbelief tinged his voice.
Roy waved his hands and shushed him. "Don't go telling the whole world about it, dumbarse. And it's for two people - Marth and I are going out later, but he's meeting me at this new place on the Avenue."
Sliding the classroom door open, Link stepped into the brightly lit room, Roy behind him, and sat down in the nearest seat.
"All right then, how much money of your own can you wager?" Link asked, producing a pad of paper he dubbed his 'wager log'.
"Ten bucks, roughly," was the answer. Link wrote it down and checked it, grinning all the while.
"Sign here, here, and put your initial here," Link said, pointing to the various places for Roy to sign. Roy wrote his name and initials practically all over the sheet of paper before Link put it away, and they shook on the deal to confirm it.
A disgruntled looking person trudged into the room and threw his things onto the desk.
"Another year to put up with this bullshit," he murmured, sliding the office chair out from underneath the desk, and sat on it. "I should've taken that one job offer and ran away from here, but nooo. Everyone always said, 'Oh Schuldig, you're the smart one!' but apparently that's a load of shit, since I'm here. And your minds all taste gross." He sighed and then narrowed his eyes when everyone in the room was staring at him oddly.
"What grade is this, third?" the man named Schuldig asked, pulling out a shiny Glock hand gun.
"Yes," Stephen Alvarez answered, his trademark DS stylus in hand as he plowed the fields in Harvest Moon DS. "Are you a psycho?"
Schuldig grinned menacingly and waved his gun in the air. "Guilty." He grinned somewhat twistedly and stared. "Your mind doesn't taste that bad..."
Stephen did not know what that meant, nor did he want to. And he didn't want to know why his thoughts felt violated.
Link then realised he had seen this teacher before.
"Oh sweet Farore," he cried, hiding behind Roy. "It's him, the guy Marth said belonged in an asy...asy..."
"Asylum?" Roy offered as his body began to shake from Link's panicked sobs.
"Yeah, that," Link answered, his head buried in Roy's back. "Though there is a funny thing I noticed..."
"What would that be?" Roy watched their whack job of a homeroom teacher lovingly caress the Glock, as if it were his baby, and felt his eye twitch.
"Doesn't he kinda sound like Marth?"
Roy heard Stephen shouting obscene things and heard the gun go off, the bullet lodged in the cement wall behind the ash-blond boy.
"What the fuck was that for?" Stephen asked, under his desk with his hands over his ears. Everyone else was screaming as Schuldig blew the smoke from the tip.
"Your whining is pissing me off."
Stephen wasn't whining at all.
"And stop plotting an assassination attempt on me," Schuldig said, pointing at one of the students way in the back. They jumped from their seat, eyes wide. They didn't say anything aloud about it...
"Are you even supposed to have a gun?" Broccoli Savannah-Sodashake shouted, trying to hear himself over the ringing in his ears.
"Not really, no. I don't really need one."
Roy cried out in distress as Link sobbed harder.
You know, Link's right - he really does sound like Marth. Kinda.
"I'm not quite sure who this 'Marth' person is, but I'm sure I don't sound like him," Schuldig said in such a nonchalant way.
There was something weird about their homeroom teacher, but no one could place their finger on it. Roy would have to ask Marth about it when he got home. Or got to a class where he could easily text. Whichever came first.
"Actually," Link whispered in Roy's ear, still cowering behind him, "he sounds like that J-Pop singer you listen to. What's-his-face. Hikaru Utada?"
Roy banged his head against his desk. "Hikaru Utada is a woman, Link. You mean Hikaru Midorikawa."
Link rubbed the back of his neck and laughed nervously. "Yeah, him."
Roy froze when Link leaned over his shoulder, practically right on top of him. "Doesn't he?"
"Doesn't he what?"
"Doesn't he sound like Hikaru Midorikawa."
Roy said nothing for a moment. "...I guess."
Link jumped out of his seat. "No no no. No 'I guess'! It's uncanny!"
Roy shrugged. He really didn't care if Schuldig sounded like Midorikawa Hikaru.
"You said the same thing about Marth, you know," Roy said, opening a blank notebook. "'Oh Roy, doesn't Marth sound just like Hikaru Midorikawa? Huh, huh, huh, huh? Doesn't he? I think he does!' And then you even asked if he knew who that even was."
Link leaned back in his seat. "And he said he did. And remember freshman year? That's originally why Terry and company went after Marth. It was originally a club for the other guy, for whatever he did."
"The 'We Worship the Sexiest Seiyuu Ever' Club."
"Yeah. And so they like, fawned over him 'cause he sounded like him. And Marth just denied it the whole time. I don't think he realises it yet."
Roy, meanwhile, wrote a letter to his father as Link rambled on and on.
Schuldig rummaged through the things on his desk and found a manilla envelope with everyone's schedules in them.
"Since you're all Third Years, I'm assuming you all know the drill by now," he said, running a hand through his hair as he placed his feet on the desk top. "And if you're new to this school, tough shit. You, with the fruity Nintendo DS" - he was referring to Stephen - "...hand these out. Now."
Stephen closed the lid of his DS and cautiously approached the orange haired man. Taking the schedules and keeping the fact that Schuldig had a gun tucked into the back of his mind, he distributed them, stumbling over a few names as he went along.
"Compare time," Link said in a sing-song voice, grabbing Roy's schedule before the red head had time to absorb it to memory.
"Heeey, we'll be having most of our classes together again!" Link chirped. "This is great. It'll be like last year all over again!"
"Minus the thing that happened at the end of the year," Roy corrected, taking his schedule back. "We don't want a repeat of that."
Link hadn't forgotten Marth and Roy's break-up and subsequent coming-back-together.
"Marth said he would fillé me with Falchion if I put the moves on you," Link said. "Which means he'd gut me like a fish."
"I hope he didn't say it like that."
"Oh no, of course not. I think he spent a whole paragraph on my punishment when alls he had to do was say, 'I will gut you like a fish, cut your body up into pieces, and make stew out of you'."
Leave it to Marth to not be eloquent.
Link examined his schedule more thoroughly after comparing them.
"Hey, Roy, there's something weird about my schedule."
Roy leaned to the side to get a better view. "What's wrong with it?"
The Hero of Time shrugged. "I dunno. I can't place my finger on it."
So Roy grabbed the schedule and scrutinised it, looking at the teachers instead of the courses.
"You did sign up for Chorus again, right?"
Link nodded. "Of course I did. I've been in that class since freshman year!"
Roy handed the schedule back with an emphatic shrug of the shoulders. "Guess you'll have to see Ms. Seventy-Five about it, then."
Link released an exasperated sigh and banged his head against the desk. "Why do these things always happen to me? They always manage to mess it up."
Roy looked his schedule over, just to be sure, and discovered that he had the same problem.
"Oh holy hell, they screwed everyone over, I think. I'm supposed to be in Pre-Calc, not this class." He pointed to Integrated Math 31 on his schedule, the same math class Link had.
Roy didn't need remediation. Link might have (along with Geometry), but Roy didn't need it.
-x-
"...lunch periods are omitted," the PA announced, and Young Link and Ness could hear the groans of the freshmen around him; no one else really cared since they knew how it went by now.
"Oh shut up," Young Link said to one kid on the way to first period. "We get out early."
"B-B-But," wibbled one boy with short brown hair and up to Young Link's shoulder in terms of height. "That means no recess!"
"We haven't had recess since fifth grade, 'Lex," Ness quipped, circling all the classes he needed changed. "And getting out at one isn't that bad."
The boy called Alex sniffled and stopped at first period, Young Link and Ness on either side of him.
"You sure this is 221?" Ness asked, hand on the handle.
"It says so right above the door, jackass," Young Link replied, pointing to the peeling paint that declared the room as 221. "I don't understand why Link told me to take Japanese in the first place. I wanted to take Hylian this year."
Ness slid the door open and nearly squashed his fingers in the process. He pushed the scared-half-to-death Alex through the door, Young Link following behind.
A podium, a desk for the teacher, and about a million chairs for the students was all that filled the room. Alex went to the very back, where Lucas was also sitting.
"What the-- There's shag carpeting back here!" Alex called, pointing to the purple coloured shag rug.
"That's a little weird," Ness agreed.
"I think Link mentioned something like that." Young Link sat down in the first row, right next to the wall. Ironically, that was Link's very seat, and Ness sat next to him in Roy's.
"So who teaches this class?" Alex asked, taking out his schedule. "I'm not sure who this 'Lowell' person is."
And their new teacher decided to take that moment to enter the room, Doughnuts Dunkin brand tea in one hand, briefcase in the other. Alex thought that this guy looked very teacher-like, which would make sense since he was one. But his homeroom teacher looked more like a student than anything else...
"...Oh Saint Akaneia, you guys are my first period?" their teacher questioned, surprised. He was so surprised, he almost dropped his tea.
Young Link snorted and Ness simply settled on staring.
"Hey, you're that guy I saw kissing that red headed guy this morning!" Lucas remarked, pointing an accusative finger at his teacher, who turned all shades of red.
"Anyway, for those who don't know who I am, I'm Mr. Lowell. Not loh-ul, Lowell. But in this class, you can use either Lowell-sensei or just 'sensei'. I have no preference." He set his tea and briefcase down on the desk and grabbed a dry-erase marker.
"This is Japanese 11, so if you're not supposed to be in here, I suggest you visit your counselor as soon as possible to get that fixed. Some of you will hate this class, others will love it; some will find it difficult, others will find it easy."
"Link said this class was hard," Young Link commented. "Did he really fail this class?"
Marth was in the process of writing things on the board. "...I am not at liberty to discuss a student's grades with another."
Capping the marker, he stepped to the side so everyone could see what was written.
"You need your textbook, notebook, a folder, and a writing utensil of some sort every day unless I specify otherwise. I'm not picky about whether it's in pen or pencil - providing I can read it. I prefer black ink, but blue is fine. I don't care what colour pen you use on your notes, but quizzes, tests, and homework need black or blue. I will be checking your notebooks, and I collect homework every day."
Ness was diligently taking notes whereas Young Link stifled a yawn. Typical first-day-of-class spiel. He had heard it many times before in grammar school.
"If you make a mistake, use white-out. I hate scribbling outs and cross outs. And I know some of your penmanship isn't the best, but please try to be neat."
Another student in the class, Inigo, raised his hand.
"What is it?"
"Are you OCD or something?" Inigo asked, lowering his hand back to his desk. "Seriously, sensei. When we rip things out of our notebooks, do we have to remove the frilly things? If there's one tear, will you make us redo the assignment?"
Marth sighed and opened his planner. "Congratulations, Mr. Montoya, you earned your first detention. See me tomorrow morning."
Inigo looked flabbergast.
"I deal with enough crap at home with twice as many as you, I'm not going to put up with it here. Oh, and yes, I prefer you use loose-leaf or get a notebook with perforated edges. And if your work is too sloppy, I will make you redo it. There is nothing wrong with being neat."
Perhaps the long list of rules about assignments being neat didn't bother Young Link and Ness as much as it should have. They lived with Marth - they were very well aware of how anal-retentive he was about neatness.
"I also want a planner, so you can write down your assignments. I will check them every day we have homework - which will be every day, possibly - so make sure you get one. It can be a memo pad for all I care."
"Do you want a certain size or colour or pattern, sensei?" Inigo asked for the purpose of being a smart arse.
"Not only do you have detention tomorrow morning and Friday morning, but that's a referral to Discipline for you." Marth removed a pad of paper from his desk and filled it out. Thirty seconds later he ripped it off the pad.
"Go now before I lose my last nerve."
Inigo grabbed his bookbag from the floor, swung it over his shoulder, grabbed the slip from Marth's hands, and walked out the door to 206A on the other side of the roundish hallway.
"Now that that's out of the way...I'll be giving out your textbooks. I want them covered."
-x-
"Why am I in this class?" Roy muttered as he and Link entered their first period together. There were only about two other people in the class, all asking themselves the same question.
"I know why I'm here!" Link chirped, planting his rear in a seat near the middle of the smallish classroom.
"So does everyone else," Roy replied, taking the seat next to him. "But...but I did fine and everything in my classes! I even got switched from Geometry to Algebra Two, for the love of Roland."
Link drummed his fingers against the desk from too much anticipation build-up. "Then go and make an appointment to get out of here."
"I shall," Roy replied, just as their teacher, Mr. Olimar, entered the room, binder in hand.
Oh sweet Elimine, Roy thought. He looks like my Fencing instructor back in Ostia before General Cecilia took over.
Mr. Olimar placed his things on the desk at the front of the room, and flipped the binder open to his first period roster.
"You're all Third Years, correct? At least credits wise."
Link was about to say something, but Roy elbowed him in the ribs.
"Let's just say you're a junior and be done with it," Roy murmured, doodling in his notebook.
"All right then. Let's see... Gary Martin Stu Wesker?" Olimar looked up and peered around the room to see where he was. "Gary?"
Gary Stu Wesker strolled into the room then, just as the late bell rang out. He smoothed out his platinum blond hair and produced a hall pass.
"And you're coming from where?" Olimar asked when Gary stopped in front of his desk.
"Discipline office," Gary replied, half out of breath. "I was...needed there." It was no secret that Gary Stu Wesker's father was the new Head of Discipline, and no secret as to what his father did to naughty students. If Crazy Hand were still the head of the school, such activities would not be going on, for he was good about things like that. However, Tabuu felt that extreme measures for bad students would be great, for it would deter future delinquents from causing trouble. That was what Tabuu wanted, anyway. Whether it would actually work, no one knew.
Olimar took the pass and pointed to a seat in the front. Gary shuffled dejectedly to his seat, sighing all the while. There had to be a way to stop his father from experimenting on innocent students. It wasn't like anyone would believe him outside of the people who already knew, for his father was good at covering these things up. A chemical spill during a Chemistry lab. Toxic waste being dumped in a nearby lake. There were many things he could say to keep the authorities hot off his tail.
"All righty, Gary's here... Roy Eliwood Pherae?"
Roy was amazed someone managed to pronounce his last name right on the first try. He raised his hand slightly.
"Here."
"Link Anaka Mekkai?"
Link, preoccupied with his Nintenpod, almost missed his name. "Right here."
"Stephenie Alvarez?" Olimar didn't realise how outdated that name was, and was in search of a girl with ash-blonde hair. "Stephenie?"
Stephen cleared his throat and crossed his legs. "Stephen, thank you. Stephenie was my old name."
Olimar cleared his throat and simply stared at Stephen. "Bwuh?"
Stephen sighed. He hated explaining to new teachers his situation. "When I first came to the Academy, I was a girl. They threatened to expel me if I didn't change to a guy, so I did and changed my name to 'Stephen', basically chopping of the 'ie' part. Everyone calls me 'Steff', though, if it's easier."
Link snuggled into his Melee Academy Cheerleading Squad hoodie and lowered the volume on his Nintenpod. He had heard Stephen's story about a million times and didn't want to hear it a million more.
Olimar nodded slowly, the knowledge sinking in slowly. Tabuu didn't say anything about transgendered students.
"Um...okay. Well, now that that's settled... Onto what I need in this class."
And that was where Roy stopped listening and began texting instead. Flipping open his red RAZR-esque phone, he checked his messages.
"You have 3 new messages," was displayed on the screen, vibrating thrice.
dis class sux, read the first message. Roy rolled his eyes at Link's atrocious netspeak and texted him back.
You need this class. I don't. STFU and deal with it. He clicked Send and waited for it to continue before moving on.
I get off from work early. Need a ride? was the next message. It said the sender was Marth, which Roy figured.
Yeeees, I do.
The last message was your standard spam text from your dopey phonebook friends.
"...since you're all probably taking another math class in addition." Olimar was unaware that half of his students weren't paying any attention to him whatsoever. "And that's about it."
Link was playing Solitaire on his Nintenpod and losing miserably; Roy was playing Tetris on his cell; Stephen was playing his DS; and Gary was thinking of various ways to change out of this class.
"I don't expect much from you guys, but please take this class seriously. This isn't an easy 'A'."
"Bullshit," Roy muttered, texting Link back. "Full of crap."
Olimar neared Roy's desk just as Roy pocketed his phone. "Is there something you would like to share with the class, Mr. Pherae?"
Roy blinked. "Uh...no?"
Olimar tapped his foot. "Uh huh." He made a motion for Roy to cough up whatever he was hiding. "Give me your cell phone."
Roy cocked his head to the side. "Why? I don't have it out or anything."
"You were texting, and that is against the school policy."
Roy couldn't refute that logic, of course, since Olimar was right. But you had to be stupid to think that the students didn't bring their cell phones. Stupid or naive. Even the head of the school, the guy-hand-being-thing that made the rule, knew the students brought their phones to school.
"You have no proof I was texting," Roy answered. "My phone is in my pocket and off. I use it for emergency purposes only, not to text someone sitting next to me. I'm not stupid."
Olimar wasn't going to let it go. "Either you hand it over to me now, or I'm sending you to 206A with a white card."
Roy shrugged. "Go right ahead. I still didn't do anything wrong."
And so Olimar walked away and signed a Disciplinary Action slip, checking off "Cell Phone Violation". He tore it off the backing and held it out for Roy to come take.
"Let this be an example of what to not do."
Roy grabbed the slip after picking up his things and walked out of the classroom.
Does this guy honestly think I'm going to go to 206A? Even Roy, who had never had a referral before, knew what horrors awaited him in that room. There was no way he was going there and no one was going to make him.
So he went into the bathroom and decided to ask Marth for advice. He knew exactly what Marth would probably say: go get it taken care of. But Marth didn't know just how evil their Head of Discipline was. Roy could end up mutated beyond recognition by that guy, for all he knew.
Help me, Marth, they want me to go to the disciplinary. He slid down the bathroom wall as he hit the send button, and waited.
-x-
After waiting out the remainder of first period in the bathroom, Roy slipped out and into the throng of people in the hall. Marth had told him to just ignore it, for Mr. Albert Wesker was one evil guy, and was reportedly doing odd things with the students he deemed 'naughty'. Roy had torn up the notice and thrown it in the toilet, nearly clogging the thing, before he left it. Taking a peek at his schedule, he headed down the stairs to the third floor, and right off the stairs was 306, his English classroom.
He walked through the open door and saw a whole bunch of students he didn't recognise. Taking a seat on the opposite end of the room, he decided it was best to stay away from the other kids - they looked like they would end up being the future criminals of Nintendo Land.
This is like sixth period Chorus, he thought. Or, as Zelda called it, 'Chorus for the Future Criminals of Nintendo Land'.
The bell rang just as the last of the students sat down.
"These new uniforms are bullshit," one of them said, his voice deep and rather gruff-sounding. "Who the hell said that this tie system was a good idea?"
"Whaddya mean?" Stephen asked, twirling his pen between his fingers as he leaned on the desk.
The kid held up his tie. "My tie is red, and no one thinks this is odd or a bad colour combo?"
Stephen shook his head. "Uh, no. We've had the tie system ever since I can remember, when my step-father attended here."
The other kid muttered, "At Brawl High, we didn't have this crap. We could wear whatever the hell we wanted."
Stephen shrugged. "This ain't Brawl High, so get used to it."
"I'm gonna start a goddamn revolt against this shit," the kid said, puffing out his chest, his green fringe blowing in the breeze from the fan.
"Robert," one of the other kids in the class, Dean, said, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Don't do somethin' stupid, man. Wesker'll kill you for sure."
Robert scoffed. "What's he gonna do to me, huh? Inject me with T-Virus or something?"
No one said a word, nor did anyone move. Except Stephen, who pulled out an extendable DS stylus strapped on his thigh (for emergency purposes, of course) and stabbed Robert in the shoulder with it.
"Oh!" Robert said, pulling the non-too-lethal Nintendo object from his shirt. "Oh that's it, you're going down!"
Stephen urged him on with the wave of his fingers. "Come on, sucker. Bring it!"
"What're you gonna do, huh? Stab me with a pen in my retinas like you did to Nickie-boy?"
Stephen thought only those in his year one Japanese class knew about that incident.
"No," Stephen answered. "My step-dad is actually in one of the tournaments this year. I learned some awesome moves from him."
Robert laughed as Dean retrieved his older brother's mechanical pencil-sword.
"Bring it."
Stephen grinned and moved his arm so it was even with his shoulder.
"Oh this should be interesting," Robert said, crossing his arms.
And then Stephen's fist ignited and he punched at the air, his hand connecting with Robert's face. Roy, who was watching the fight for lack of anything better to do with his life, immediately recognised the move.
"I didn't know Captain Falcon was your step-dad," Roy remarked, impressed at the flawless rendition of a 'Falcon Punch'.
Stephen grinned triumphantly as Dean nursed his brother's now-broken jaw.
"Little know fact, I guess."
Their English teacher finally arrived, attendance book in hand. Roy thought he looked a lot like Fox, except with different coloured fur and a meaner looking face. He seemed to completely ignore the student on the floor and sat down at his desk at the far end of the room. All eyes were on him, except for Stephen's and Roy's.
"What the hell?" Robert asked, getting back on his seat. "We have a fucking animal as our teacher?"
The teacher put his feet up on the desk and crossed his arms. "I prefer the term 'anthro-fox', actually."
"... The only freak show we had at Brawl High--"
"Will you shut up about Brawl High?" Stephen shouted, ready to punch Robert again. "This isn't Brawl High, this is Melee Academy. If you have such a problem with it, why not just drop out?"
Robert growled and was about to pounce when Stephen moved his desk back, causing Robert to miss and fall to the floor again.
"You fail," was all Stephen said. "Fail, fail, fail."
Their teacher cleared his throat then, and slid his feet off the desk. "As you may have guessed, I'm your teacher. You can call me Wolf. This is AP Language and Composition, just in case you're not supposed to be here. As much as I enjoy seeing people fight - that was sort of apart of my previous job - I don't tolerate it in my classroom, 'cause then I get in trouble and...well, that won't be too good. So if you want to kill each other, do so outside my class. And...I think that's about it. The bell should be ringing at any time, so do what you will with the rest of the time."
Robert cleared his throat. "So as I was saying before this sonovabitch decided to mess with me... The only freak show we had at Brawl High was some dude with wings. Wings, goddammit."
Stephen shrugged. "Whoop-dee-do. Things like that cease to amaze any of us here. Now if someone looked like Godzilla or something, that'd be pretty weird."
"What about that Mr. Koopa dude?" Dean questioned. "He's like a...Godzilla thing."
And so the bell rang, leaving the question to hang in the humid air.
-x-
"So Roy," Link said, strolling through the crowded fourth floor corridor with Roy next to him. "I have this uberly awesome idea that you'll just love--"
"Where the hell is room 411?" Roy asked, schedule in hand as he looked at the numbers above the doors.
"Who cares?" Link asked, and then continued on with, "So, do you wanna hear my brilliant idea? It'll be the best thing ever attempted in Melee Academy history and--"
"I care," Roy argued, ignoring Link's babble about another so-called 'brilliant' idea. "If I'm late for Chemistry, my teacher'll probably kill me."
"Who do you have?"
Referring to his schedule, Roy read aloud, "Lucario, A."
They stopped by the faculty bathroom in the hallway next to the one Roy was seeking.
"...Who?"
Roy shrugged. "I haven't the faintest idea as to who that is. Must be one of the new guys - I vaguely recall a memo being passed around the Manse about it..."
And so they continued their treck to room 411.
"So anyway," Link said, "do you want to hear my brilliant idea?"
Without hesitation, Roy replied, "No."
"Well tough cucco eggs, I'm telling you anyway!"
Roy sighed. Figures he'd pull something like that on me.
"I'm thinking about making a club. See, we open up a request box, and if students or teachers need 'jobs' done, we can do them for cash!"
Roy stopped just a few feet away from his Chemistry class. "...You didn't happen to see this somewhere, did you?"
Link grinned cheesily. "Actually, I did."
Figures he was influenced by some stupid thing somewhere.
"...This club doesn't involve dangerous objects like, I dunno, pyrotechnics or anything? I don't want to explain to my father why half of my arm is burned again... He thought I set fire to myself using the Fuuin no Tsurugi and it took me about an hour to explain everything and--"
"I did that in Freshman year and you're still going on about it?"
"Hello, Link, I still have scarring from it! Not to mention I have reduced sensitivity and all. Life changing accident you caused, there." Roy slid the door to room 411 open and stepped one foot inside it.
"...So are you joining the Do-It-All Club or what?" Link wanted to drop the whole 'accident' thing.
Roy wished he had an actual choice in the matter - Link was going to have him join it whether he refused or not.
"...Do I have a choice?" Just to be sure.
"No."
And with that, Link skipped off to the stairs leading down to the third floor.
Roy sighed and fully entered the classroom before realising just where Link's inspiration came from.
I compared him to Matsuri Honjou from Sukisho! once and he decides to pull this kind of crap? Marth's so lucky he's not here right now.
Unfortunately for Marth, he ended up suckered into it, too. Link somehow made him the club advisor.
-x-
"...and then we had sex up against a kitchen counter, and it was great."
Roy wished he had shown better judgement in who he sat with, he really did. Stephen was a cool guy and all, but the people he hung around... They were just plain weird.
"That's epic," Stephen said, his breath nearly taken away. "Tell me another weird place you had sex at, Mark."
Mark smirked. "I've been pretty much everywhere. Being an army tactician does that stuff, you know. I get to bang hot women and do it in the weirdest places and... Ch'yeah."
So instead of listening in and feeling like some kind of voyeur, Roy texted Marth yet again with three very distinct and very Altean words.
Save you from what? came the response. And why are you texting me during class?
Roy rolled his eyes and hid his phone more; he didn't want a repeat of what happened with Mr. Olimar.
Save me from these weirdos in my chem class, Roy sent, along with, And I'm texting you cause it's boring here otherwise.
I wish I could help you with that, Marth texted back, but I'm busy right now. Just...ignore them.
Oh yeah, 'cause it's totally easy to ignore someone talking about their weird sex acts, Roy responded. And Elimine damned Terry is in my stupid class. He's devising a plan in which you're attached to a bed or something.
"They didn't have Chemistry at my old school," one of the new students said. He and a kid with wings sticking out of his blazer were sitting in the far corner of the room, along with a small crowd of people.
"But Ikey-chan," one of the otaku-ish fanboys said in a horrendous Japanese accent, "that's so baka."
'Ikey-chan' merely shrugged. "I could care less either way. All I need to know is swordplay. That's it."
A pokemon floated into the room and shoved his things on the nearby podium. He looked as if he didn't want to be there, a sentiment shared with most of the Academy.
"I want your full attention," the strange looking pokemon said. "I am Lucario. This is my classroom, therefore, what I say goes. I do not tolerate your bad behaviour. So long as you remain on my good side, you are all fine." He opened his attendance book.
"Stephen Alvarez?"
Stephen raised his hand. "Yo."
"Pit ...Icarus?" Lucario cared little as to whether or not he pronounced names correctly.
The kid with wings raised his hand and waved it a little.
Lucario sighed. This wasn't a very exciting job, teaching. But it paid good, and if he didn't do it, Tabuu would throw him out. Being thrown out meant no money, and no money wasn't a good thing, either. So really, he had no choice. But that didn't mean he had to think it was very eventful.
"Roy Pherae?"
Finally, someone who pronounced my name right on the first try! "Here."
"Mark Retsu?"
Mark gaffawed at Terry's not-very-brilliantly-awesome plan to seduce Marth. "Yeah, I'm here."
Lucario scanned the room as he called the next name. "Ike Troy?"
The kid who was called 'Ikey-chan' by some Weeaboo raised his hand. "I'm here."
Lucario missed Terry, and really didn't care. And the sad thing was, Terry didn't even notice.
"...I wonder how good Marth is in bed..." Terry wondered aloud with a wistful sigh.
Roy banged his head against his desk. "You know I can hear you fartknockers, right?"
Terry got into Roy's face, uncomfortably close to the red head.
"So what?"
Hello, do you not realise that Marth and I are still together? "So? That's my boyfriend you're talking about."
Terry didn't get a notice saying Marth and Roy got back together. "...Wait, when did this happen?"
Roy stared at him blankly. "You know, I knew you were a little on the thick side, but gods, man, I didn't realise you were this stupid."
Terry grabbed Roy's shoulders and shook him. "When did you and Lord Marth get back together?"
Lord Marth. That utterly killed Roy. He never even called Marth that, not even when they first met three years ago.
"If you'll stop trying to shake my head off," Roy said, steadying the panicked senior. "Anyway, yeah. The end of last year. I'm surprised you didn't know this, considering you practically stalk him."
Terry wanted to know why he didn't know such important information, either.
-x-
"Out of uniform on the first day, Link?" Emma asked, not surprised in the least to see the blond enter the office.
"Yep," Link replied as he approached the counter. "This is nothing new, though."
Emma laughed. "No, it's not. But you do realise you can wear the blazer around your waist or something, right? Not wearing it at all is against the rules."
Link nodded. "I know, Em, I know. But I was born to break those rules."
Emma's laughter and Link's bad attempts at flirting filtered out into the hallway, right where Roy was waiting.
"I have prior engagements," echoed down the hall from some other point. There was a groan of disappointment then, and a woman in stilettos and a ton of blue clothing rounded the corner, coffee in hand.
"I'm sure they're not too important," she pressed, trying to rub up against the other faculty member. "What's one little 'Sorry, can't make it'? Besides, you promised you'd spend more time with me, since we rarely see each other!"
The male teacher saw Roy standing there and quickly made his way towards him, as if Roy was his last chance at salvation.
"Marth? What're you--"
"Are you ready for our...date?" Marth heavily accented the 'date' portion of the sentence, hoping the teacher next to him would get the message. She did not, for she grabbed his arm and rubbed up against him. Roy's face darkened.
"Who's she?" Roy asked at the same time the female teacher asked, "Who's he?"
Marth did not like being in the middle of a love triangle. A love triangle he drew himself, even.
"...Roy, this is the new librarian, Sheeda. Sheeda, this is Roy."
Sheeda and Roy switched their gaze from each other to Marth and back.
Wait a minute, isn't this woman... "Marth... Is this who I--"
Marth nodded his head. "Yes. This is my wife."
-x-
"I wish you would've told me your wife was visiting," Roy said, styrofoam cup filled with coffee in his hands as they walked down the Avenue. Marth shoved his hands into his pockets and sighed.
"I wish I knew Sheeda was visiting," Marth confessed, a little downtrodden from the event at the school. Seeing Sheeda and Roy stare blankly at each other was a little...disconcerting, he thought.
"I hope you know how awkward that whole thing was," Roy quipped after sipping some coffee.
"I realise that," Marth replied. "And if I could have avoided the whole thing, I would've."
They had arrived at one of the decent parks in Nintendo Land. There were scarcely any kids around, so it was eeriely quiet.
"Hey," Roy said, sitting down on one of the concrete benches. "You know that weirdo teacher on the fourth floor? I think his name was Schuldig or something?"
Schuldig was a very hard person to forget.
Marth nodded, sitting down next to Roy. "Yes, I know him. Why?"
Roy rested the cup on his knee and sat against Marth. "...He's a little...odd. Like, he said our minds tasted like crap, and then Link said the weirdest thing."
Link always says weird things, Marth thought, resting his arm on the back of the bench, behind Roy. This isn't new, Roy.
"What did Link say this time?" Marth asked in a voice that said "I've heard this before."
Roy laughed just thinking about it, and that freaked Marth out a little.
"He said Schuldig...sounds like you. Or you sound like him."
There would have been silence, but a garbage truck drove past and drowned it.
"Says the kid who thinks doors are a pain." Marth didn't see the similarities in his and Schuldig's voices.
I think Link is on something.
"And then he went on to say that you don't realise you sound like Hikaru Midorikawa."
Marth sighed in a defeated sort of way and slumped in his seat.
"One of these days I think I'll just answer 'yes' so he won't bother me anymore. I don't know where he gets these things. I don't sound anything like Midorikawa Hikaru."
"Oh yes you do!" Link said, popping out from a nearby bush. Roy jumped and Marth shrieked.
"And I will insist until you realise it yourself!"
Marth, who wanted out of such a topic, distracted Link with, "So what did you do today in class?"
Link didn't notice the change in topic. "Oh yeah, it was swell I guess. My science teacher is a weirdo, though."
"So's our homeroom teacher," Roy added. "We have to see him tomorrow, too."
Link jumped out of the bush and pulled a twig out of his rear.
"Oh no we don't!" Link shouted, waving the twig around frantically. "I'm not sitting for a half hour with that nutcase! Especially one that sounds like Marthy-boy over here."
"'who sounds like', not 'that'. 'That' is for inanimate objects," Roy corrected. "Gods, didn't you learn anything in English class freshman year?"
There was a slight pause. Link was poking Roy's arm with the twig in his hand, and Roy was looking at him with a not-too-pleased look on his face.
"I don't even remember freshman year too well."
Roy grimaced. "Of course not. Not when it's something important like that."
Link waved his comment away. "My English is just fine. Better than most of the people in Hyrule. I dunno about you guys, though."
Roy and Marth looked at each other.
"...I'm one of the few who can speak English," Marth admitted. "I mean, you remember what I sounded like when I first came here. It was understandable but a little awkward."
Link drummed his fingers on his arm. "Yeah, it was half-backwards at times."
"Or half in Altean," Roy chimed in.
"Your English wasn't perfect, either," Marth retorted, crossing his arms.
"Better than yours," Roy remarked. "Then again, half of the people in Castle Pherae speak English, so..."
"I have no reason to speak English at home."
"Neither do I!" Link chimed, getting in between the two lovebirds. "But...but Zellie always said I spoke good, so..."
"Why the hell are we arguing about this, anyway?" Roy asked, standing, his coffee now cold. "Anyway, we should be getting home. I'm sure Peach is wondering where we are."
Roy threw his cold coffee into one of the rubbish bins and stretched.
"Peach knows we can fend for ourselves," Link said. "If anything, they'd kidnap Marth."
Marth looked just a little bit offended. Pressing the palm of his hand into his chest, he said, "Me?"
Link nodded and Marth scoffed, jerking his head to the side slightly.
"Why would they take me?"
Link grinned and siddled up to Marth, hands behind his back. "'Cause you're the girliest of us three. They usually go for girls, don't they?"
Marth's face deadpanned and his hand dropped to his side. "Actually, I wouldn't talk if I were you, Link. Your hair is so long, I almost mistook you for Samus yesterday."
Roy laughed and doubled over and Link's face fell. Marth folded his arms and grinned so smugly.
"Oh yeah?" Link said as they began to walk home, Nintenpod in hand. "I thought I saw Elice yesterday, but it turns out it was only you."
No one laughed.
"My sister's hair is waist length, Link," Marth corrected, demonstrating on himself. "Mine isn't even shoulder length."
"And you've never even seen Princess Elice," Roy commented. "I've never even seen her."
And with that, Roy got in between Marth and Link; he grabbed Marth's hand and laced their fingers together.
"So where are we going for our little 'date', Marthy?" Roy asked, swinging their arms slightly.
"I told you this morning," Marth replied.
"I forgot."
"Typical of you, Roy." Link was flipping through his million and one songs on his Nintenpod.
"Shut up, Link, this conversation does not include you," Roy hissed.
"Both of you," Marth interjected. "What are you, six?"
"Sixteen," Roy said, just as Link said, "Seventeen, almost eighteen."
Marth almost forgot that Link had been held back and was therefore, only a year younger than him.
"Then act like it," Marth replied. "Anyway, you and I are going to that new place that opened up a few days ago. I hear it's supposed to be good."
-x-
After their date, all Roy wanted to do was cuddle with Marth and just relax.
Of course, in The Manse, it was utterly impossible to relax. For various reasons, including annoying neighbours.
"Hmm, this makes for a good gag."
Roy's protests were muffled as his own tie was used to cover his mouth. Marth kissed him through the fabric and smirked as he slowly unbuttoned Roy's shirt. Roy's arms were free, but he was using them to remain on the bed - he was half on and half off it, and one wrong move would send him onto the floor.
"Mmmf!"
"Oh please, Roy, I didn't even take your shirt off yet." Marth was too busy nipping at Roy's throat to really care about Roy's shirt.
The door slammed open and there stood Link, his jeans half off, as was his shirt. He looked absolutely mortified.
Roy went crashing onto the floor and Marth with him, landing on top of the teen. Roy grunted loudly as Marth's elbow collided with his shoulder as the rest of Marth's body followed, knocking Roy's breath from him.
"It was horrible!" Link shrieked, his eyes unable to see the scene before him. It was like he was blinded. "Horrible! My eyes, they cannot unsee these things!"
Roy pulled the gag off his mouth and pushed Marth off of him a little, enough to sit up. Marth ended up rolling off him and onto his back, sputtering all the while. He swore he broke one of his ribs, but he wasn't sure if it was his or Roy's.
"What the hell happened to you, Link?" Roy asked, hastily rebuttoning his shirt.
The Hero of Time yelled something incoherent.
"All I heard," Marth said as he slowly sat up, "was something about a horde of bees."
Before they could ask Link was he meant, the blond had fainted in all his half-dressed glory.
-x-
Author's Note: Yeah, sorry it took so long! I've just been swamped with school work. The first week I was working on this, I had issues with my schedule I had to get fixed, and then my teachers are so homework happy... Hopefully the next chapter won't take so long!
...Oh man, I hope Link's gonna be okay. What does a horde of bees have to do with anything? I guess you'll just have to wait until the next chapter!