I've had this idea for a while but never written it down. I was sort of inspired to by 'Aint it Fun' (SisiDraig), but I don't think it's as good as hers! Oh well. Hope you like it! Is very random.

Disclaimer: Not mine., never has been, never will be. Damn.

Howard rubbed his eyes vigorously with the back of his hand, leaving tear stains on his cheeks.

He picked up his bag and took one final look around the flat. he was going to miss this place. More than he ever thought possible.

He didn't know what it had been about this place, about these people, that rendered him so incapable of doing anything right. When he'd been younger he'd thought he was so smart. He'd thought he could handle anything. Seems he was wrong.

His eyes rested on a photo on the mantelpiece. Him and Vince. He picked it up and ran a finger over Vince's smiling face. He wished he could see him one last time. With a sigh, he went to put the picture down; before changing his mind and slipping it into his bag instead.

"What're you doing?"

Howard froze. oh, shit… "Vince! You…you're not supposed to be here!"

"Obviously." the younger man's eyes combed the scene in front of him, taking in the packed bag, the travelling coat, the missing items belonging to Howard. They stopped on the note marked 'Vince' propped up against a lamp shade. He frowned and picked it up.

"Vince, no…" Howard tried to stop him, but it was too late. The younger man read the note quickly, his eyes getting wider with every line.

"I see." he muttered when he'd finished. "And were you going to wait for anyone to get back, or were you just going to sneak away?" he sounded quietly furious.

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry? Sorry!? Howard, you were just going to leave!"

"I cant do this anymore! I thought I could, but I cant! I care about you too much to stay!"

"That's weird logic, even for you!"

"It isn't! I…" Howard swallowed. "Vince, there's so much you don't know about me. So much you could never understand."

"Try me."

"I cant."

"yes you can. You were leaving, Howard, there has to be a good reason!"

"Maybe there is! But that doesn't mean I have to explain it to you!" Howard yelled suddenly. Vince looked suddenly scared. "God, you are like a fucking child! 'Howard, are there tarantula's eggs in bananas, Howard, can I have a drink?, Howard, Howard, Howard' every fucking day, Vince! Do you have any idea how bloody annoying you are?"

"Whatever, Howard." Vince tried to look like he didn't care, but his mouth was trembling slightly.

"Move. You're in front of the door."

"No."

"Get out of the way Vince."

"No. not until you explain."

Howard reached into his pocket and pulled out a gun. "I said get out of the fucking way!"

"Fuck!" Vince raised his hands, face completely horrified. "Howard where the hell did you get a gun?!"

"I've always had it. I always use it to…" he broke off.

"Howard?"

"I'm an assassin, Vince."

There was a silence. Vince looked like he couldn't decide whether to laugh or cry. "You're joking, this is a joke."

"No."

"But…you cant be an assassin, Howard. I've known you too long…"

"You've never known me. Come on, do you really think there are people like Howard Moon in the world? People who think brown and jazz are the height of fashion? Please. Howard was just a creation so I could get close to Naboo. A loveable idiot that no-one pays any attention to."

"I pay attention…"

Howard sneered. "Really? Yet you didn't seem to notice anything wrong, did you? All the bullshit stories I've fed you over the years, I thought at least one of them would have made you realise something was up. I mean; the spirit of jazz? Remember him, hmm? At the zoo? I told you I couldn't play an instrument without him taking control of me."

"Yeah, I remember, but…"

"I've been in a band for the past fucking two years! Where do you think he went?!"

"I don't…"

"I summoned him at the zoo, in the hope he'd get Naboo when I left him alone there. Didn't exactly work out." he snorted.

"You've gone wrong, Howard." Vince said quietly. "you cant be an assassin. You've never killed anyone…"

Howard laughed. "God, you are so fucking stupid. No wonder it was so easy gaining your trust. I'm not just gonna kill any old person, I'm hired to go after one specific target. In this case Naboo."

"So why haven't you killed Naboo?"

Howard smiled. "How do you know I haven't?"

Vince cast a nervous look at the shaman's bedroom door. "he's…he's out."

"But I'm the one that told you that, Vince."

Vince's eyes widened.

"why're you doing this?"

"Um…because I get paid?" Howard smirked and waved the gun again. "Now get out of my way before I put a bullet in you."

"You wouldn't."

"Why? Because we're friends? We're not friends. You mean nothing to me, Vince. You're nothing more than the annoying little pest who got me into Naboo's flat and into his life."

Vince blinked, tears snaking down his face. "If I mean nothing to you, why's there a picture of me in your bag?"

"I…because…" Howard seemed to freeze for a moment, and then the cruel façade slipped and he lowered the gun. "Please, Vince. Please don't make this any harder…"

"Any harder?! You've killed Naboo!!"

"But I haven't!" Howard exclaimed in frustration. "I haven't."

"But…"

"That's why I need to go, Vince. I got too involved, made friends with the target. I cant kill him. Not now."

"Well, then why cant you stay?"

"Because I've failed. And the people I work for don't take too kindly to failure." he drew a finger slowly across his throat and Vince gasped in horror.

"Naboo'll protect you, yeah? There has to be something…"

"No, Vince! You are always so sure everything's gonna turn out alright. Well I have news for you; it isn't. the world isn't like that. My world isn't like that."

Vince glanced around. "Let me come with you."

"No chance. Remember last time we tried to run away?"

"I'll do it properly this time! Listen when you tell me to pack light!"

"No, Vince!" Howard sighed. "Vince, my life is dangerous. Especially now. You wouldn't be able to cope with it; always moving, changing your look, your name, never making friends, never going out unless you have to. You'd hate it."

"I'd cope."

"And how do you think I'd feel? If you got killed because of me? You're safe here. I know you are."

"But I love you."

Howard felt a sudden urge to hit Vince. "that doesn't matter."

"It does to me."

Howard rolled his eyes. "Oh, that's alright then! The big nasty men won't hunt me down and slaughter me like a fucking dog, because Vince fucking Noir just wants to love me!"

"Stop it!" Vince pleaded, tears running down his face.

Howard suddenly felt guilty. This was the last time he was ever going to see the younger man, he didn't want to end it like this…

So Howard did the one thing he'd never done. The one thing he'd wanted to do for months, maybe even years. He leaned forwards and he kissed Vince. Vince gasped in surprise, then relaxed and moved his mouth against Howard's. the older man wished with all his heart he'd done this sooner. They could have had ages. A proper relationship maybe…

Maybe they still could. Howard slid his hand around Vince's neck, burying it in the deep black hair. Vince moaned softly, the kiss becoming more needy. It was then that Howard pulled away, regretfully.

"I'm sorry, Vince. I cant put you in harms way. I need to leave. Now. Tonight."

"I cant let you. Not after that. Not after…" he swallowed. "I don't want to be here without you."

Howard felt as though he was about to cry again. "I know. I'm going to miss you. So much."

"Then don't leave me." Vince whispered. Howard wanted more than anything to just wrap his arms around Vince's slender body and never let go, but he knew he couldn't. so instead he raised the gun again and pressed it into Vince's stomach.

"Please Vince," Howard begged. "Please just let me go. I don't want to hurt you. But I need to leave. Now. And you're in my way."

Vince stared at Howard, then looked down at the gun. Then back into his friend's face. He licked his lips nervously.

3 minutes later, Howard came hurrying out of the front door. He threw his bag into the back of the van and climbed into the driver's seat, starting the ignition. His hands were shaking violently; he was going to have to try and calm down or he would cause an accident. He took several deep breaths, and the trembling eased off slightly. He still felt like he was going to be sick though.

Howard looked out of the window, back up at the flat. "I'm so, so sorry, Vince." he whispered. "You deserved better than this."

With a small sob, he pressed down on the accelerator and sped off into the night.

Like I said, very random. Oh well. Reviews are loved!!x