A/N: new story based on "Near To You" by A Fine Frenzy, this is the first one I've written and it came to me while I was walking home today. Needless to say I rushed home to type it so I wouldn't forget anything. Story not set in school, they're about 20 so don't freak out.
He and I had something beautiful
But so dysfunctional, it couldn't last
Hermione sat on the couch next to the fireplace, telling Harry about her very recent break-up with Ron (it had in fact happened about ten minutes ago). Harry rubbed her back while she cried.
"Everyone had always told us we would be so perfect for each other and I only followed what was expected. I mean, I couldn't exactly say no while the entire common room was watching."
"Harry, I did like him, I did, but we fought so much. About everything and just about anything he could think of. He hit me, Harry, in the last months. He hit me when he knew I was right, when I was wrong, when I wouldn't kiss him, but the worst Harry, the worst was when I wouldn't go all the way with him. I would've happily done that, but I was so afraid he'd hit me for doing something wrong."
"I hate the bruises and he, he always looked so smug and today, this morning, he, he . . ."
"Shh, hush now Mione, it'll al be alright. I'm here now . . ." Harry comforted her.
I loved him so but I let him go
'Cause I knew he'd never love me back
"Tell me how it happened, Mione. How'd he leave?"
"It wasn't all him, I told you I loved him Harry and I had fallen in love with him, before he started . . . you know, it was so much pain to deal with. He was so violent when we were alone and I still loved him, so when he said he wanted to break-up I just said "ok," I had to let him go. He never loved me like I loved him; in fact, I don't think he ever loved me at all. He walked away and I just, well, you know . . ."
"I know, you ran to find me. It's ok, I'm here now."
Such pain as this
Shouldn't have to be experienced
Harry sat in silence now, holding a sleeping Hermione in his arms. Crying had tired her out and he didn't mind, she needed the comfort of a good friend.
She shouldn't have to go through this, she deserves so much better. How in Merlin's name could anyone hurt her? That bastard will hear from me later . . . I swear, if had known the bruises were there . . . if only she wasn't so good at those glamour spells, then I would've known and I could've hexed him all the way to Durmstrang. No one deserves this pain and torture.
I'm still reeling from the loss,
Still a little bit delirious
"Mione, wake up, it's almost midnight," Hermione heard Harry say.
Hermione woke with a start, thinking Harry and Ron and instantly shied away from him. When she realized who Harry was, she cried. Her body shook and was racked with sobs. Hermione was so confused and hurt and she felt so lost and alone. At least she had Harry.
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
Hermione walked into Harry's house around midnight for the fifth week in a row. She had been having nightmares and Harry knew just how to calm her down and get her to sleep.
Harry woke up when he heard her lock the door; here she was yet again, unable to sleep and hating being awake. He walked to her, took her in his arms and rubbed her back. She began to cry in his arms and told him all about her nightmares.
"Hermione, shouldn't you . . ."
"Be over him by now? Ginny asked the same thing, I'm afraid I . . . I'm still attached."
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Yet, I'm better near to you.
Harry woke up to find Hermione already cooking breakfast. He walked up behind her and hugged her good-morning. Like always, Hermione shied away from the surprise contact.
Harry sighed, how long would this take? Five weeks and she still shied away from him.
Hermione seemed to pick up on his thoughts, because she started speaking as soon as he though it.
"Harry, you know he's out of my life now, and you've been such an immense help. I finally slept through the night, thanks to the bed-time stories you tell me every night, but I . . . I just need time."
Well, you and I have something different
And I'm enjoying it cautiously
Three months later, Harry took Hermione out to dinner and they returned home without eating, without even stepping into the restaurant. Harry didn't ask why they didn't go in; he waited until the got back to his house.
"Hermione, I need to know, why wouldn't you go . . ."
"Harry, I'm so sorry, but . . . he took me there once and, and that was the, the first time he, he, he hit –"
"I understand, Mione," Harry soothed as he took her in his arms.
He had to admit he had started to love the smell of her hair and skin and . . . would she let him kiss her?
"Harry, come sit with me," said Hermione, motioning to the couch.
She sat down with him and allowed him to put his arm around him. She turned to him, placed her hands on either side of his face, and slowly breached the distance between them. His lips were soft and warm, she liked the feeling. She liked the sense of being so close to someone. Harry responded to the slow kiss with tenderness, not wanting to upset her. Hermione continued the kiss, lightly licking his lower lip, but when Harry moved his tongue to meet hers and moved his arms around her waist and neck, Hermione ran up to his room and locked herself in.
Harry sighed, he knew he shouldn't have, he should've been cautious. Upstairs, Hermione was conflicted. She had begun to like Harry in a non-platonic kind of way and she needed his touch, but the kiss grew into too much. She hadn't meant for it to go so far, she felt like this should be taken slower.
I'm battle scarred, but I am working oh so hard
To get back to who I used to be
"Hermione, I'm sorry about last night."
"No, I should apologize. I shouldn't have reacted that way, I mean, I was scared."
"How long will it be until I can touch you and you won't shy away?"
"Harry, I am working hard, so hard, to get better. Pressuring me like that will not help anything; I care about you, more than I thought I could, but I, you have to understand I will never be exactly who I used to be. I'm trying, just give me time.
He's disappearing
Fading steadily
"You sleep well, Mione?"
"Much better, thanks for asking."
"You fell asleep in the middle of Cinderella, you must've been tired. Any . . . dreams?"
"Surprisingly, no. No more nightmares, no more dreams of . . . him, at least none that I remember."
Harry was happy, before Hermione used to wake from every single dream and tell him all about her fears. And now, well now she slept through the night and could not recall dreams about that insufferable git.
I'm so close to being yours
Won't you stay with me
Please
"Harry, where are you going?" Hermione asked, a tone of need in her voice.
She always became depressed and uncertain when it rained.
"Just to get some potion supplies. I'm running out of spider legs."
"Oh, ok then, will you come back?"
"Of course, I always do. Hermione, will you be ok without me?"
"Harry, please stay with me," she begged.
Harry stayed and held her in his arms on the couch. It wasn't really cuddling. It was protection and reassurance. Hermione needed him and he knew it, he never felt used, he felt like he was doing the right thing.
Hermione felt horrible inside, she was very happy with Harry. She was close, and she knew it, to being able to fully give herself to him. All of her. She just hated being alone.
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Harry took Hermione shopping for some new muggle clothes, it was summer and he knew she needed dresses and shorts and girlie things like that. He knew she'd be happy, but he lit up inside when he saw a true smile on her lips when she tried on a simple red dress.
"Did you know he never let me wear red? He said I would clash with his hair."
Then Hermione did the most amazing thing. She laughed.
Yet, I'm better near to you.
Yet, I'm better near to you.
Hermione felt so happy to be dating Harry. She had finally allowed him to take her out and she regretted not letting him earlier. But she was glad, she could handle this. She could handle a relationship.
I only know that I am
Better where you are
"Hermione, I'm leaving. I have to go to the office."
"Can . . . can I come?"
"We've been through this. You can be here without me."
"Harry, please don't leave me, I feel so alone. I am only better when I'm with you, where you are."
I only know that I am
Better where you are
"Mione, I can't go with you everywhere. You need to get out by yourself sometime."
"Harry . . . last time you left . . . I, I broke the windows. It was a magical outbreak, I was just so alone and lost, I was ashamed so I replaced the windows. I can't be left alone. Every time I am alone, I think about, about him, and I just feel so much better being near to you."
I only know that I belong
Where you are
One year later, Harry found Hermione curled up, reading on the couch. It was now or never.
"Hermione, will you marry me? You'll never have to be alone, you'll always belong to me, and I will make you as happy as humanly possible. Will you do me the honor of being my wife?"
"Oh Harry, yes! Yes, of course. I love you."
"I love you too."
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
Though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
It was raining again and Harry had found Hermione about to cut herself. He promptly snatched the knife from her and she sobbed into his shoulder.
"I'm sorry Harry, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry, but you said, you said you'd come back soon and it had been six hours and I was just so worried and I began to think about him and oh, I thought you were leaving me, and oh Harry I'm so sorry."
"Hush now, it's ok. Mione, I would never leave you, I pledged my love to you and I meant it. Now no more of this nonsense, let's go to bed."
"Harry, I'm sorry."
Near to you, I am healing
But it's taking so long
'Cause though he's gone
And you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Harry and Hermione walked down the street, holding hands, their faces glowing. They had recently found Hermione was pregnant with twins and were going to tell all their friends. Hermione was laughing and smiling, until they reached Madam Rosmerta's pub in Hogsmeade. Harry softly squeezed her hand and they walked in to find Neville and all the Weasley children plus Molly.
Ron was thankfully not there, but the sight of his brothers who looked so much like him made Hermione break down and cry, clinging to Harry for support.
Harry made an apologetic face to everyone and took Hermione home to comfort her. He held her in his arms as she sobbed into his shoulder, apologizing for being such an emotional wreck and ruining the day. Harry told her everything would be fine and he understood, sighing and wondering whether Hermione would ever be ok.
Yet, I'm better near to you.
Yet, I'm better near to you.
Two years later, Harry came home to find Hermione playing calmly with the twins. He stood quietly by the door and watched the worry begin to wash over her as the clock struck 7. He sighed and cleared his throat; Hermione turned and ran to him. She flung her arms around his neck and welcomed him home, quickly followed by four arms grasping his legs. He looked down to see his two green-eyed girls, one on each of his legs, smiling mischievously at him.
Harry smiled, so happy to be home, trudged his way to the couch and the girls went to bed when he sat down. Hermione sat beside him and he kissed her cheek lightly, asking her how her day was.
"Calm, surprisingly, but much better now that you're home."
The truth was that Hermione had really had a good day, but had begun to worry around 6:30. She had begun wringing her hands but all the anxiety went away when she saw Harry. She felt so loved and whole when she was with him, she loved him.