Her wand is at my throat. Tight across my windpipe, air is forced from me into the room where we stand. I give myself to it because it seems like the end.

I feel a hand. Cold, and creeping under my shirt. At the base of my back, it lingers. Then it moves upwards, up into the space between my shoulder bones and round to slide its way around my neck.

I shiver.

She moves closer. I can feel her body against my back. She moves her head towards my shoulder, her lips brush my ear. I inhale sharply, breath restricted, and inside I scream. And then she whispers.

"Do you remember?"

Oh, I remember.

I always remember, I live it, I breathe it, I dream it. There is no verb for nightmare. Her, me and the shrinking universe between us. Left, right, good, bad, pain, pleasure. There is no such thing as opposites anymore.

It was me as much as her. Caught in the moment, falling, I don't know. I remember not knowing, I remember not caring. Hating, loving, wanting. Meaningless verbs just dancing in my mind.

I know what we did. You know what we did. She knows what we did. She blurred everything in my mind, erased the lines, told me she loved me in a voice that said she wanted me dead. Believe, forget, outline. I don't want to remember and I won't let myself forget.

I feel her teeth on my ear. They go lower now, down to my neck. The hand slides back down its shadowy path, to the base of my spine, and then it moves, traces the curve between my hip and my stomach and a finger traces a spindly line across my abdomen.

My eyes close.

"Yes, Aunt Bellatrix. I remember."