Right... I told you I was going to put up another story as soon as I got back from my holidays. This one is another Yullen. Less serious than Shattering Mistake, and much more funnier... also... much more mouth watering! Don't worry though, your dose of graphic sexual scenes is already under way :D

Only thing... Kanda is going to be uke... don't flame me until you've read it!

Lavi and Allen were in the cafeteria, each busy with the last bites of their own meal. Allen had seconds of everything, from pasta to roasted chicken and was munching on a buttered bun, eyes fluttering closed at the sweet taste and moaning an appreciative purr.

It was quite dizzying to see Allen savour something ever so slowly, he who could shove a turkey down his throat in three bites. His moan was embarrassing Lavi to no end, his mind stunned by such a sexy show.

"It's just a buttered brioche damn it. Do you have to make it sound like you're coming in your pants?"

And he tried to make the boy stop his sound: "Hey Allen, I didn't know you liked sweets."

"Uhm, I don't usually eat them because I need to feed my Innocence with proteins and carbohydrates so all I ever eat is meat and bread. I also eat vegetables and fruits to get vitamins and that doesn't leave much space to fit desserts in my meals. But I do love them, and when I'm not on a mission I try to eat some once in a while…"

"Eeh, I didn't know you have a list of food to follow!"

"Yeah, you know, my arm takes a lot of energy, and proteins and carbs are essential."

"I see… so what dessert do you like best?"

"Oh if I could ever choose I'd eat triple hazelnut and raspberry fudge cake with a looot of whipped cream on top! It's so rich and buttery, and moist too! First you are kissed by the fluffy goodness of the whipped cream, then you bite the crunchy outer layer of chocolate and your teeth sink into the moist chocolate cake, and then into the layer of hazelnut and raspberry spreads. It's so good I…"

"Allen! Allen! You're drooling!"

"Oh! Sorry! I… it's been so long I last ate it…"

"That's the weirdest fudge cake I've ever heard of by the way."

Allen chuckled before answering: "That's the special fudge cake recipe I created."

"What? You invented it? When? How? I mean… huh?!"

A gloomy look descended on Allen's eyes: "Well, I once had to work in a French patisserie for six months to repay the debts of my master… But in the end it wasn't half bad, I learnt a lot about French patisserie! And I got to eat a lot of it for free to!"

"Ooh! So you can cook cakes and desserts! God Allen! You should have told us sooner!"

"Eheh, I'm sorry Lavi, it just didn't come up."

"You MUST cook something for us! We'll throw a party!"

"Oh, I'm not sure Jerry would like me to take his place in the kitchen…"

"Oh, right. Well, we'll do something small then. We can have Lenalee, Krory, Miranda, Marie and Kanda! No wait… Kanda doesn't like sweets… he'd kill us if we made him eat cake."

"Mmm I'm not sure about that." It was more of a whisper but Lavi's trained ears got it with no problem.

"What, what? What do you mean?"

So what was left for Allen was to explain. "Well, it' s like fish."

"Huh?"

"Some people say they don't like fish. Period. But that's not true. They may not like seafood, or fish with too many bones… but usually it is just a matter of finding a type of fish or a way of cooking it, and they'll eat it and lick their lips. Most people like salmon, or tuna. Still they say they don't like fish."

"Well they say salmon and tuna don't taste like fish. It's more like meat, plus they don't have annoying little bones."

"Well as for sweets, there are sweets that are not sweet."

Lavi blinked. "Come again?"

"Not all desserts have to be overly sweet. And there's one thing I believe would make Kanda moan."

Lavi was bewildered. "No fucking way. What is it?"

"Well… it's… special. My special cake of bitter chocolate."

"Bitter chocolate? That doesn't sound good…"

Allen leaned closer to Lavi, eyes sparkling maliciously. "It's just like sex."

Lavi's jaw dropped slightly "Who is this Allen moaning and talking about sex!" He blinked, and Allen continued, almost murmuring:

"It's just a question of finding the right strings to pull. Everyone has a more sensitive spot… that when touched, or rubbed, or licked will send him rocketing around the moon. You find that thing that makes him scream and he'll be at your mercy… even begging for more."

Lavi was having difficulties at swallowing. But Allen went on, merciless, and ever closer to Lavi's ear.

"And during sex some things that normally you don't like are just what will make you loose control over your body and mind. Some people like being talked dirty… some others like to be smacked… You want to know my favourite?"

Lavi nodded twice without even blinking, staring with wide eyes into nothing.

"Back biting. Normally I'd punch back at being bitten… but if I'm bitten on my back and shoulder blades during sex… well just that can bring me over the edge in an instant."

Lavi had stopped breathing altogether and his only thought was: "Back biting… how would he be bitten on his back if he is fucking a gi… ooh!"

Yeah, Lavi. Not a girl…

He was definitely intrigued now.

But Allen didn't seem to want to stop and Lavi couldn't stop listening either, hypnotised by this unknown sexy Allen.

"You see, bitter food is not usually loved, but bitter chocolate, if you are the right person, will give you just the right combination of sweetness and bitterness. And you'll keep wanting more because the taste changes as the tongue rolls it in the mouth and all of the taste buds are solicited. It is a whole new sensation… and Kanda is just the right person… he would appreciate the sweet melting butter and the bitter saltiness in the taste. Plus my spicy secret ingredient would shock him pleasantly… Believe me… he'd moan."

Allen drew back, a devilish grin still changing his usually polite features, and it took a moment for Lavi to stutter:

"It sounds perfect for him. You've got to cook it."

Allen suddenly blushed. He got carried away with the description but he never meant to cook it for Kanda: "No, wait!"

"What no? You've got to! I can't wait to see Kanda moan!"

"No! It also depends on how you feed him the cake… it's also a question of atmosphere! Tasting and savouring something is not shoving it in your mouth and gulp it down!"

"Well…" Lavi's demonic mind was already at work "I'll think of something…"

So, are you interested?

There's actually an alternate version I'll be working on, making the sex scene reversed with Kanda as the seme. I'll see how it works out and I'll upload it for you to read. Right now though, the story will continue as I stated at the beginning.

Wanna know what happens next?