The Girl Who Cried "Lipitorious"

"Lipitorious" is a word my Dad came up with while sitting in the Dentist office waiting to be checked, and he was trying to help get a story idea. In his immense boredom, he came up with a new made up word…

Hope you enjoy!

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Renesmee POV:

"What're you reading, Nessie?"

"Lipitorious."

"And that means…?" My Jacob asked.

"It means," I said in a superior voice that'd make Aunt Rose proud, "the downward curl of your upper lip." I tried to hold in my snicker.

"Oh.." he said, uninterested in a book, once again.

Later

"What are you reading, dear?" Mommy asked. She's always interested in what books I read, because I tell her what books she should read and what not to read. (I'm not allowed to read them, but Daddy still doesn't know about Mommy's romance novel fetish."

"Lipitorious." I replied shortly. All I wanted to do was read my book.

"Is it a good one? What does the name mean?"

I pretended my giggle was a sigh. "It means a man's hungry heart."

"Ooh! Mommy giggled, interested. "No sex smut though, right?" She asked in a stern voice.

"No…" I sighed. My parents were such dorks. I was allowed to participate in vampire fights and be present, but not allowed to read about sex.

Later

"'Ello Nessie," Quill said in his loud, and sort of obnoxious way.

"Quill." I nodded in acknowledgement. He bugs me sometimes, but I still love him.

"Whatcha reading' Ness?" My silly Jacob. I love my nickname, but I know I will never live it down.

"Lipitorious," I said for the third time this week.

"Huh?" Quill asked. He's definitely not stupid, but he only uses words that bug when he has to, and being a wolf person like Jacob, that interpreted to about trice a year.

"It means," I once again had to control my laughter, "falling through the ground."

"Really?" He asked, intrigued.

"No," I snickered. "It means man who dies a laughingstock." He laughed.

"I'm so reading that after you."

"You read?" I asked sarcastically. He just rolled his eyes.

"Of course."

Later

"Hey Nessie. Whateryoureading?" Charlie asked in a grumpy way. Uh-oh, he must've seen Daddy hold Mommy's hand… I swear, he's the most horrible person when it comes to understanding affections.

"Lipitorious."

"What the heck does that mean?" He grumped at me.

"It means," I grumped right back, "affected negatively by others' love."

"Oh." He chewed on that, realizing the "irony," but not the fact that I had created that irony. "I may need to borrow that sometime," he said quietly.

Later

"Nessie," Daddy called.

"Yes?"

"Why is it," he asked curiously, "that all I hear about lately is the word and multiple meanings of Lipitorious' in everyone's mind?"

I went through in my mind for him, trying to skip over the main part of my trick…(and Mommy's romance novel fetish.)

"Nessie… Trickery…" Daddy said proudly, "you definitely have a dose of Jacob and Alice in you."

He chuckled and picked up Lipitorious.

Oh, no. I thought, he knows! I giggled as he pulled off the paper covering the cover of the book. Underneath the fake cover were the words The Very Hungry Caterpillar By Eric Carl.

"So, Nessie, what does Lipitorious really mean?"

"Well," I started, once again, "it means…

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PS! Later Nessie told Bella about her tricking everyone and Edward and Bella sat back as their creative child tricked everyone she knew, including Rose, Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Billy, Embry Sue, and so on… but she couldn't trick Jasper and Alice. L

reviews Please?! begs