Um Ive been in a slump lately, but this just pumped out of me for some reason.

I hope ya like it. Its a songfic by the way...and AU...and probably OOC...

warnings: blood, rape, character death. AU OOCness

pairings: GrimmShiro, and ShiroIchi

italics are from the song Strawberry Gashes by Jack Off Jill cept for the letter part, but there is a line from the song in there, its underlined.

Pale.

White.

Skin.

With strawberry gashes all over all over.

Ichigo had worried for his twin. Nights spent sleepless when he had not come home.

But he never thought something like this would happen.

XxXx

It had been a normal Saturday. Ichigo went with his friends to a movie, Shiro went out with his friends and boyfriend to some random party.

His twin had been dating a certain senior for a couple months now. Grimmjow Jeagerjacques was his name. Ichigo had always been weary of the man, deeming him bad news. But that just drew Shiro in. The mystery and danger was intoxicating for the pale boy. Grimmjow dragged his brother around with him everywhere wether he wanted to go or not.

On multiple occasions his twin came home with bruises, cuts, and broken bones.

He seemed to be depressed all the time too. Just heading to his room without saying a word to the rest of the family.

Ichigo knew something was desperately wrong.

But did he do anything to stop it?

No.

He deeply regretted that now.

XxXx

A scream erupted from a nearby car parked alongside the road. Ichigo was walking home from the movie he and his friends had just seen, all parting their separate ways.

Being the good guy he was he felt the need he should save the screaming person. He had helped many people before, and gotten praise for it. But all that he had seen hadn't prepared him for what his eyes laid upon through the slightly foggy car window.

There lay his brother, eyes closed, naked, with large red gaping wounds scattered all about his body. Blood smeered his porclien white skin, tainting it. Above him the blue haired beast of a man plunging himself in and out of the unwilling body.

Ichigo stood there.

Frozen.

Shiro was gasping for breath and screaming as the older man laughed and laughed, further impaling himself into the teen.

"Do ya regret it?"

The pale one didn't speak, he didn't seem to have the will to, just nodded very slightly.

"One stupid kiss. Was it all worth it?"

Much to the assaulter's dismay, Shiro nodded yes. That granted him a plunge to the rips with a dagger.

Shiro coughed up blood.

"Your sick you know that Shiro? To think you got this from kissing your own twin while he was asleep. Not only sick, but a fucking coward as well."

The sentence made Ichigo flinch, the zipper to his jacket sliding across the car door.

"Speaking of the said twin here he is now? How do ya feel about your precious brother seeing you like this Shiro?
Hm?"

Black and gold weary eyes opened to gaze straight into deep brown. The pale copy mouthed two words.

'Im sorry.'

After that the boy passed out and Ichigo fought his way into the car. He was ballistic. Unknown strength showed itself and he was able to push the beast away from his brother and pull the pale body into his arms.

The boy laid limp.

The redhead began to run, run and not stop. Taking alley ways and cutting through peoples property to get his only brother back home and to help.

But he tripped sending the body in his arms falling onto the ground. Ichigo scurried over to his twins landing place, checking his pulse.

But it was gone.

Non-existent.

The redhead beat on the bloody chest, but nothing happened.

Watch me lose her,

It's almost like losing myself.

A wail of sorrow ripped through the quiet air, as hot tears streamed down Ichigos face.

Once again picking up the body of his brother, he slowly walked home.

XxXx

Ichigo stood, hot water streaming over his body.

His father thought it best for him to take a shower to wash all the blood off as he checked over the body.

Somehow he believed this was all his fault in a weird twisted way. His life would never be the same.

Scold me failed her

If only I'd held on tighter to her

Pale white skin, that twisted and whithered away from me away from me.

If only he'd paid more attention. Had been around the other more.

Cared more for him.

XxXx

Later that night he found a letter stuffed under his pillow.

Dear Ichigo,

I'm sorry. For everything. If you never see me again don't wonder. Ive brought this fate upon myself. I was caught doing something i should of never done. But i have been for quite some time. I'm sorry. I really am. Some things you lose, and some things you just give away. I gave myself away. I only have one thing to say really though Ichigo. One thing so ludicrous and defiantly not normal...I love you. And not brotherly love. Love love. I'm sorry. I know you could never love me back. You probably think Im a freak now right? Well im sure you wont have to worry. Grimmjow said he'd kill me. I'm sure hes going to. Now my hellish existence can finally end.

I love you,
Shiro

Water smeared the inked words. Shiro didn't know one thing. Why didn't he just say something? Sure the thought was a bit weird, but he'd do anything. Just for this not to happen. He cared for the other more than anybody else.

That night the lonley redhead cried til his eyes dried up. A small knife ran its way across tan skin, blood bubbling to the surface.

Give her my soul

And let them take somebody else, get away from me

Watch me fault her

Your living like a disaster

She said kill me faster

With strawberry gashes all over all over me.

Review if you want