It was summer time in Hinamizawa, and Keiichi and Hanyuu were discussed the various going-ons around the town, particularly the love triangles that had formed between their female friends, who happened to all be lesbians in a random streak of good luck. Since it turned out that Keiichi and Hanyuu were actually the only straight members of their little group, they ended up getting together, despite Hanyuu looking like an elementary student.
"So...I heard Satoshi announced he was asexual and joined the army." Keiichi remarked as he affectionately petted Hanyuu on the head. The two of them were sitting on a bench near the bus stop, waiting to get a ride to the Sonozaki Residence.
Hanyuu nodded and replied, "Yeah. I just hope he doesn't get any weird ideas while he's there. All those chiseled adult men, sweating and taking showers very often...he might be tempted. I didn't know him for very long, but he seemed like a nice person..."
Keiichi agreed to that. "It's also good that Shion and Mion aren't as unnaturally violent as they used to be. I mean, Shion smacked me across the head with a chair once, and that was BEFORE the Hinamizawa Syndrome struck..."
Since their relationship had begun, Hanyuu had admitted to Keiichi about her powers and allowed him to remember everything that had happened during those incidents, including his deaths, which he wasn't exactly happy about. He was also able to see her horns now, but he didn't pay much attention to them, but rather to the girl they were attached to.
Kissing the little purple-haired girl on the forehead, Keiichi whispered, "I'm glad you were able to help make everything right in the end, my little angel...even if Shion is still crazy."
"Don't worry, Kasai-san is training to be a psychiatrist so he can help her...or so I've heard...he's a very good man." Hanyuu explained.
"SHION'S STILL A CRAZY BITCH! SHE HURT SATOKO, DAMMIT! AND MION! AND RENA! AND RIKA! AND...AND ME, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!...But I'll forgive her since she's my friend." Keiichi snapped, making sure his point still stood.
Since she couldn't talk her boyfriend out of anything once he got this way, Hanyuu just gave in and nodded in agreement to his words.
Eventually, the bus finally arrived. As they took their seats onboard, Hanyuu turned to Keiichi and asked, "By the way, how are things between Rena and Mion?"
"They're fine," Keiichi replied, "But...it seems that crazy-bitch Shion wants in..."
"She's in love with Rena, too?" Hanyuu gasped.
"Nope. She's in love with Mion. She wants to have 'sweet twincest love babies' with her..." Keiichi said with a slight blush.
Hanyuu blushed as well, and then asked, "...How did Rena react to this?"
"HOW THE HELL WOULD I KNOW?" Keiichi shrugged and laid back in his chair, "I was lucky enough to hear that part about the 'love babies'..."
"I hope everything works out between them..." Hanyuu muttered under her breath.
Keiichi reached into his pocket and pulled out his cellphone. Flipping it open, he fiddled around with it for a bit before finally finding the picture he was looking for. Holding it up for Hanyuu to see, the picture was of Takano and Satoko yelling at each other while Rika looked on in embarrassment.
"This, my darling," Keiichi said with a grin, "Is the other lesbian love triangle going on in good ol' Hinamizawa; TakanoXRikaXSatoko!"
Hanyuu giggled and exclaimed, "And to think...Rika's actually the pedophile in this love triangle! She's over 100 years old! At least...I think so. I didn't keep count..."
"Damn, you're so cute when you're confused!" Keiichi mused as he stared at Hanyuu's face.
"Au, au, au..."
"AWW, YEAH! SSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CUTE!!"
"YOU'RE MAKING ME BLUSH SO HARD, KEIICHI-CHAN!"
"GAH! KISS MY ASS, BITCH! KEIICHI IS RUNNING AWAY!"
So he jumped out the bus window and ran off, leaving poor Hanyuu behind. Of course, she still loved him. It was just something he usually did every now and then.