Author's Notes/Warning/Disclaimer: I needed a break from editing/writing my angst IZ stories, so I decided to write this. I swear I wasn't on drugs when I wrote this. There is one main OC, plot holes, character death, and humour that might frighten or be found offensive to some people. I don't own Invader Zim or any of its characters, objects, insanity, ect.

Rated T for gore.

Introduction

When someone in the universe rises to power, all the energies of planets, super novas, and other such non-living things start to gather in what some might say is the center of the universe. It's impossible to say if it truly is the center of everything in existence or not since the dark void of space goes on forever, but the Tallest had taken over most of the known universe, so these galactic energies met to decide what they should do about it.

"No one has ever come close to ruling the universe like this before," one of the energies spoke.

"I don't like it," echoed a second.

"Hey, maybe we should hold some kind of contest you know?" a third piped in.

"Yeah, the winner could get like one wish or something," the first suggested.

"One wish? Pft. That's stupid and corny," remarked the third.

"Ok, we could crown the winner the Ruler of the Universe! That would be cool right?"

"You know, for balls of energy drifting in space we're pretty clever," the second said.

"WATCH OUT FOR THAT BLACK HOLE!"

"AAHHHH!!"

The energy that survived the black hole flew off to find the "chosen ones." The Tallest were picked of course, since they already ruled over many planets but finding someone to challenge them was a little trickier. At first the energies thought it would be pretty clever if they chose a representative from each of the planets the Tallest had taken over to challenge them for dominance over the universe, but that would have occupied too much time. The Tallest could die before the energies actually agreed on anyone. There were too many planets under Irken rule.

Instead they decided to select the Tallest's biggest annoyances for the job. Zim and Gir were chosen, as well as two members from the Resisty.

They were candidates everyone could agree on.

"What about this Dib person?" a completely different energy questioned.

"What species is he?" the second one from before asked.

"Human I think."

"What the heck is that?"

"We're energies spawned from locations in the entire universe; I thought you would know what a human is," the third interjected.

"Nope. No Idea," the second admitted.

"Then let's have two of these humans compete," the first energy stated.

"What is a human!?" the second hollered.

"Shut up!" the first snapped

"Ok… I hear Dib's sister is pretty scary," the fourth guy remarked shuttering a little at the thought.

"Yeah, but I don't think we should disturb her," the second said thoughtfully. If he had a chin, he probably would have scratched it for no other purpose other than to show he was thinking.

"Why?" the third asked.

"She's on level 46 of GameSlave 2."

"Ooohhhhh," everyone exclaimed in awe.

"That's a hard level," remarked the second.

"Tell me about it! I still haven't made it passed level 43!" the first exclaimed.

"Ha ha, what a loser!" the fourth laughed.

"Hey! I have more important things to do than play GameSlave all day!"

"You're a ball of energy! What else could you do? Other than drift around aimlessly or get sucked into black holes."

"I'm not telling you."

"What about their father; Professor Membrane?" the second asked, getting back on topic.

"Ok fine! I knit!" the first stated loudly.

"Nobody cares what you do in your spare time moron!" shouted the fourth.

"Yeah, he must be smart if he's a professor. Let's get him to compete too," the third ignored the others, answering the second.

"Alright, so we have Zim, Gir, Dib, Professor Membrane, Lard Nar, Purple, Red, and Shloonktapooxis all competing for the title "Lord of the Universe!" the second announced sounding excited.

"I guess we should get started then," said the first.

"Right. I'll set up the place while the rest of you go fetch our honoured guests."

"We should have an audience!" the fourth exclaimed.

"Oh oh! I'll gather some random aliens for the audience," the third offered.

"We'll need a few Irkens to keep it fair," remarked the fourth.

"Would you hurry up and get going already!? This contest isn't going to run its self!" the first yelled at all of them.

Planet Earth seemed like a nice place, except for the suffocating pollution, loud traffic, annoying birds, clogged drainage pipes, the strange alien life forms yelling and swearing at each other, the garbage truck, ok so maybe the ball of energy was being a little picky about the place. It wasn't all bad. The sea was a nice shade of blue, the sky was clear, and there were a few trees sitting around. Even if the planet was horribly polluted, it was still alive.

Locating the Membrane household took a long time, even though the universal energy got the local energy on the planet to help him. Unfortunately he wasn't any good with direction so he got lost a few times on his way there.

When he did finally arrive, he slipped in through a crack in the window and drifted across the living room. He couldn't help but stop and peer over the young girl's shoulder as she sat playing her GameSlave 2.

"If you want Dib, he's in his room," Gaz grunted as her thumbs rapidly pressed the buttons on her game. She didn't even raise her eyes to look at him.

Without making a sound, the ball of energy floated up the stairs and into a room of stuffed animals. The small furry object's eyes started glowing red, and he zipped out of there and into another room where he found a boy lying on the bed reading a UFO magazine.

"Dib?" the ball of energy questioned him unsurely.

"Huh?"

The boy glanced up from his magazine and nearly fell off his bed when he saw the sphere in his room. He backed away and stared at it a moment longer before relaxing a little bit.

"What are you? A ghost? Did you come to haunt me?" He asked almost excitedly.

Ok… this boy was weird.

"Wait a second," he said jumping off his bed. "I'll go get the camera!"

"I'm not a ghost! I'm energy given off by super novas and other stuff in the universe, and I've come to collect you and your father!"

"Dad? He doesn't believe in stuff like this," Dib replied as he began rummaging through his dresser searching for his camera. "Where do you plan on taking us anyway?"

"It doesn't matter if he believes or not, I still need him to come with me. You'll find out where I'm taking you soon enough."

"I think he's downstairs in his lab right now," Dib said, grinning as he found his camera and lifted it to his eye. Before he could take a shot (not that it would have mattered since he forgot about the lens cap again) the ball of energy created a dimensional tear in the young human's room, and Dib was sucked into it.

The ripped closed, and the sphere shaped energy thing drifted down the stairs and under the door to the lab which was located fairly close to the kitchen. There was a tall human in a white lab coat hunched over a desk with a couple different devices in his hands.

"Now I shall perfect my sweet sugary toast of supreme… toast!" he shouted loudly so that his voice reverberated off the walls.

"Professor Membrane?" the ball of energy ventured.

"Hmmm!?" the professor swung around and was surprised to come face to face with a large amount of circular shaped energy. "My energy generator must be acting up again!" he exclaimed dropping his instruments so he could go check on his generator. A portal opened up in front of him, and he walked into it without a second thought.

The energy's next stop was Zim's base, which was easy enough to find. Irken technology always gave off the weirdest vibe. He drifted passed the lawn gnomes who sat silently with big grins plastered on their faces; this was too creepy…He squished himself underneath the door and was surprised to find another ball of energy floating in the Irken's living room.

"Hey! This is my job," the second energy orb exclaimed growing in size.

"I thought all of the Earth creatures were my responsibility."

"Yeah, "Earth creatures," hello!" the other called moving back and forth as though he were pacing. "Zim and Gir are from Irk genius."

"But they're on Earth aren't they? I thought the definition of Earth creatures were 'creatures on Earth."

"You're wrong! The correct definition is 'creatures who have originated on Earth.' What dictionary did you use?"

"The Oxford one; special special addition."

"Where did you get a human dictionary from!? Augh. Never mind. We'll just have to do this together then."

A horrible screech was heard from the kitchen, and Gir flew out of the garbage can and scrambled into the living room. He was in his dog costume, though this never seemed to affect his grabbing abilities. He snatched up the remote lying on the couch and flicked on the TV before jumping up onto the cushions. The balls of energy stared at the strange creature for a moment. Gir hadn't noticed them. His favourite show was going to be on in five minutes!

"Is that the robot?" one of the energies asked creating a picture of Gir out of nothing and holding it up to his companion. The picture was of the Irken robot out of his disguise, and the other energy looked at it before swiping the useless thing away.

"Of course it is! Who else would be in Zim's base other than Zim and his robot slave?"

"Squeak," Minimoose replied drifting up from the couch after being dislodged from the cushions by Gir.

"Oh my god!" one of the energies screamed flailing his non-existent arms. "There's a rabid purple moose in the living room!"

"Settle down… that's just… uhh… well I guess it is a moose." He sighed remembering the Energy Absorbing Blob Creature prototype had looked like a moose, and his friend had gotten to see it up close and personal.

"Oooo! What's that!?" Gir questioned loudly, pointing up at the shiny spheres floating above him.

"Where's your master robot-dog-thingy?" the ball of energy that wasn't panicking about there being a moose in the room asked.

"He's going to blow himself up!" Gir responded cheerfully, and sure enough, there was a giant explosion that erupted from below the house, and Zim flew out from the toilet. He landed in a smouldering heap on the kitchen floor, groaning as he reached to pry the goggles he was wearing off. He tugged on them, but they wouldn't move. They had seized to his skin. The Irken invader tugged harder and cursed when his pak started making sputtering noises. He then promptly fell unconscious.

"Great, they're both here!" the calm energy stated after peeking into the kitchen. "Activate the dimensional tear!"

"Ahhhhh! The moose is going to eat me! Some one help!" his counterpart yelled buzzing around the room in a panic as Minimoose watched with an annoyed expression on its face.

"Squeak!" it protested.

With a sigh, the now dubbed sane energy ball reached out with a vine of pure energy and grabbed Gir. The tear in the fabric of time and space appeared, and he threw the little robot inside before gathering Zim's motionless form.

"Stop fooling around!" he snapped at his companion.

"But you know how I get around moose-like life forms!"

"Then get your butt in that dimensional tear I made!"

"I don't have a butt!" the panicking energy ball shouted as he dove past the other and disappeared through the portal.

"So!? I don't have a gender!" he retorted. The remaining energy quickly followed after his friend, dragging an unconscious Zim along.

Meanwhile, in another part of the universe, a different sphere had located the Resisty's ship.

"Alright, this is my chance to show those other energies what I'm made of!" it announced to no one in particular. It dodged a piece of flying debris as it sped after the ship. The Vortian battleship (which had been magically reconstructed) was flying through space at a very fast speed.

The universal energy launched its self at the vessel, only to be sucked into the thrusters. It hurt a lot… The next time he aimed himself a little bit more carefully and struck the windshield. Squished up against this part of the ship, the small ball of power had time to realize that there weren't many cracks to slip through, actually there were none. If there were, the ship would have imploded in on itself, and everyone inside would have died a horrible painful death.

There was only one other option.

A portal appeared in the main room of the Vortian battleship, startling the Resisty who were standing at their posts. They watched wide-eyed as the energy appeared through this tear in the fabric of the universe. It flew across the room and smacked into the opposite wall. This launched the ball of energy forward, and it bounced around the room frightening the Resisty members that fled from their posts screaming in terror.

Who would have thought they would be attacked from INSIDE the ship?

"All of you stop your running around!" Lard Nar shouted from the captain's chair. He ducked as the energy flew past his head. It bounced off another wall and was hurled back across the room.

"Hey boss!" Shloonktapooxis began cheerfully as he entered the room. Obviously he hadn't heard the commotion, because he didn't react when he saw everyone else cowering behind their chairs and control panels. He blinked, and opened his mouth to say something else, but the sphere had struck another object and was hurled towards the cone-shaped alien.

Spleeew! "Ahh!" Gulp.

And just like that, the energy ball disappeared down a startled Shloonktapooxis' throat.

"Woe! What was that I just ate!?" the floating purple cone questioned.

Everyone stared at him from the safety of their hiding places, shocked. Lard Nar was also hiding after almost getting stuck by the energy being. He poked his head out from behind his chair and cleared his throat.

"Yes, uh, well, now that that's over…"

Poof.

Shloonktapooxis suddenly disappeared.

"Oh my gods!" one of the Resisty members cried, pressing the big green button at his controls; it launched him out the airlock. Everyone else screamed and they tripped over each other as they scrambled to leave the room. Only Lard Nar stayed perfectly immobile behind his captain's chair.

"What is going on…?" he murmured to himself just as the energy ball reappeared from the depths of Shloonktapooxis' stomach.

"I lost control of myself for a moment, but I've returned to…" the sphere looked around. "Where'd that cone-guy go?"

Lard Nar pointed accusingly at the strange glowing ball. "He vanished after he swallowed you!"

"Oh… Oops! The portal must have been activated while I was inside him!"

"What the heck does that mean? What are you, and why are you on my ship!?"

The room drifted into an awkward silence. Lard Nar glanced towards the door that everyone had stampeded through a short while ago, and the energy ball hovered wordlessly a few feet off the ground.

"I'm sorry, what?" the sphere asked.

"I said…"

"Wait, I remember! I need you to come with me. All of the other information is classified."

"You can't expect me to agree to this…"

"Nope, that's why I'm kidnapping you."

The energy ball advanced on him, and the leader of the Resisty let out a startled yelp as he backed himself against the wall which had turned into a rip in the universal fabric. Lard Nar fell through, and the sphere cackled evilly.

"Mwah ha… ah well… I'm done."

It drifted through the portal after him whistling a happy tune. A job well done… well the job was done anyway.

"So is everyone here?" one of the voices asked.

"I thought you said you were going to prepare a place!" exclaimed another.

"Well it's not my fault I'm not creative!"

"You volunteered for this idiot; it is so your fault!"

The place they were in was pure black. There were no doors or windows, and there was no sign of the energies themselves, though their voices could be heard clearly enough.

Standing in the center of this darkness were the selected candidates of 'Lord of the Universe:' Dib, Zim, Lard Nar, Gir, Shloonktapooxiz, and Professor Membrane.

Zim was still smouldering from his recent accident, but he was awake now, sitting next to Gir who was sucking noisily on a straw. In the disguised robot's hands was a jumbo sized slushie.

"Hey! Where did you get that from?" One of the voices questioned Gir.

"I was keeping it in mah head!" the robot replied.

"Great, now I want one…" the voice muttered.

"Be quiet, you're destroying our air of mystic!" a voice that had spoken before shouted.

"Sorry, I slept in, am I late for the meeting?" a different energy asked.

"Aw jeez…"

"What kind of horrible dimension is this!?" Zim shouted leaping to his feet and glaring defiantly into the blackness surrounding him.

"Well it's…"

"What is it!?"

"It's…"

"Whaaat!?"

"WE HAVEN'T FINISHED MAKING IT YET!" An energy being shouted.

"Yeah, it's incomplete," another agreed.

"Hey sweet! Look what I can do!" exclaimed a third.

A spotlight appeared above them, and it reflected down at Zim. The Irken looked up but quickly shut his eyes against the searing pain.

"Aughhh! My eyes!" he shrieked covering his face.

"Yaaaay!" Gir cheered waving the slushie over his head. "You're bliiiind again!"

"Wait… what's going on?" Dib asked folding his arms across his chest as he raised his eyes to the spotlight. It wasn't pointed at him, so there was no horrible pain. "Did Zim get us trapped in another stupid dimension like the moose one?"

"Son, were you in my lab?" Professor Membrane asked raising a brow. Zim was out of his disguise, and Shloonktapooxis and Lard Nar were standing out in the open. The cone looking creature began drifting away slowly. He kept going and going until he appeared on the other side of the strange dimension.

"Hey! This is kind of fun!" he announced floating past the humans, then Zim, Lard Nar, darkness, and repeat.

"I didn't do this," Dib insisted, though his father seemed sceptical.

"Neither did Zim Dib-stink!" Zim announced rubbing one of his sore eyes. He was thankful that he wasn't in his disguise. He'd had contacts fuse to his eyes before. It wasn't fun.

"This is the strangest reaction my energy generator has ever created!" the professor said pulling out a clip board and pen from his lab coat. "Very interesting… of course I could have just as easily been knocked unconscious." He pinched himself. "Ouch. Hm… well I seem capable of feeling pain, so I can't be unconscious unless…"

"You're not dreaming!" a voice exclaimed.

"Yeah, this is reality. The fate of the universe depends on you blah blah, let's start already!" a second one remarked sounding impatient.

"Hey… did anyone remember to grab the Tallest?" a third asked.

No one answered.

"You all forgot!? They're the reason we started this competition, remember now? Someone needs to go get them," the first voice that spoke insisted.

"Zim's leaders are going to be here?" Dib questioned with a scowl.

"The Tallest are coming!?" Zim asked excitedly.

"Of course, they have to be," one of the energies replied.

"Yeah, they've successfully taken over 47 planets!" a second voice informed them.

"Obviously the resistance hasn't been doing its job very well."

Lard Nar clenched his hands into fists. "We'll at least we've been trying to stop them! What have you done recently? You're the energies of the universe aren't you?"

"Uhh… yeah?"

"You could stop the Tallest if you wanted to," he stated.

"We can't directly interfere with things!" said the second voice.

"Yeah, that would be like… unfair or something," agreed the third.

"I gots a rabid squirrel in mah head tooo!" Gir suddenly shrieked attaching himself to Dib's head. He was still in his green dog costume and he was spilling his half eaten slushie everywhere.

"Could you maybe not do that?" Dib asked Gir who grinned and tightened his grip.

"But I liiiike the squishy huuuman!"

"Gir, let go of the Dib-worm!" Zim shouted. "You're going to be covered in his filthy human germs!"

"What are those!?" the robot squealed.

"This is fascinating!" Professor Membrane exclaimed as he looked over the notes he'd been taking. "To think that I'm aware that I am dreaming within the dream its self!"

Shloonktapooxis finally stopped floating across the dimension and moved next to Professor Membrane who was holding a pen to his chin in thought.

"Yeah that is pretty weird!" Shloonktapooxis said glancing sideways at all the nothing surrounding them.

More Notes: there will be a lot of characters from Invader Zim running around, so keeping track of everyone will become difficult. A small warning just in case you are easily lost. Honestly, if a character vanishes for any length of time, it's probably because I forgot about them.

The Energies of the Universe are not Meekrob. The only difference between them really is that the Universal energies have more power and were born from super novas and things like that. The Meekrob were born from their planet and have very limited abilities, such as they cannot construct their own parallel universe. Never gain limitations by being born on only one planet! -waves fist-