Disclaimer: The characters and backstory of Angel do not belong to me. They belong to Joss and David and the WB. Although in my opinion the WB does not deserve them with the moving them to the Monday time slot behind 7th Heaven. That's alright though because if they are maneuvering to get rid of Angel like it appears at least I am confident that UPN will pick Angel up as well. One can dream.
Spoiler alert: This piece contains spoilers up to the third season episode That old gang of mine.
A Book by it's Cover
By
Rogue Amazon Boo
Midnight, the witching hour, Wesley thought as a far off clock chimed from within the depths of the Hyperion Hotel. The old hotel creaked and moaned the way only gothic monstrosities can. Time, heat, and neglect were the only things standing between the Hyperion and it's former glory, well that and the exorbitant amount of money it would take to really fix the place up. With a sigh Wesley Wyndham-Pryce III leaned back in the hard office chair and used one hand to massage his neck. It was late and the former watcher should have been on his way home but after the night's adventure at Caritas he wasn't sure if he could sleep. Best to get some work done. Besides he had to see Fred back to the hotel after what had turned into a disastrous evening for her. With a sigh Wes stood up and headed toward the kitchen. He wasn't really hungry but he needed some tea. Tea always help to calm him when he was angry, and make no mistake, Wesley was very angry at the fates this night. With a disgusted grunt he went about boiling some hot water and tried not to think about how it all went so wrong so quickly. Cordy, he knew, was feeling the same way; feeling as if they had both let Fred down. She was suppose to be safe with us tonight and what happens? We almost get her killed. Gunn's old crew had come in with guns blazing like a band of western desperadoes. If one of the Demons hadn't got up at precisely the right moment Wes knew it would have been Fred's bullet ridden corpse he would have pulled off the stage at Caritas. With a sigh he went to the cabinet and pulled down his favorite coffee mug, the one Cordy had made for him at the mall that said Have Demon, Will Slay. He always wondered what the faces of the people she purchased the item from looked like when she had them personalize it. With a grin he pulled the mug from the cabinet but no sooner as his amusement had come it vanished in a wave of white-hot anger. With a curse the former watcher slammed the mug onto the counter only to spin around at the startled sound behind him.
"I-I'm sorry to have disturbed you. I-I didn't think anyone would still be here. I'll get out of your way," Fred stuttered and started to quickly hurry away.
"Fred…wait…please," he called out having recovered from his own shock. The timid physicist turned her big brown eyes his way and slowly walked back to him. She reminded Wes of a doe, not sure if the hand being held out to her contains food or poison. She was wearing a white tank top and an over sized pair of sweat pants. With her big brown eyes and her long dark curly hair pulled back into a ponytail she looked like a pre-teen girl going to her first sleepover. Not for the first time did Wesley realize that she was really a beautiful young woman. Not beautiful in the sense of Cordelia who had the kind of stunning good looks and personality that made any man who was still breathing, and some that were not, stand up and take notice. Fred's beauty was more the type that if a man were to take the time to give her a second look he would be lost.
"I really didn't know anyone was still here or I would have…" she said and trailed off. She looked uncertain and scared. A state of mind that seemed to be following her around these days. At least she seemed to be making progress towards integrating herself into the real world. Usual though she would only really leave her room with a bit of coaxing from Angel, or when nobody else was around. It was then that Wes realized that Fred probably used these late hours to accustom herself to leaving her room.
"You would have stayed in your room? Then it is I who should apologize for intruding upon your time. Perhaps I should go anyway. It is getting to be a bit latter than I usually work at the office anyhow," he said and turned toward his now boiling water to add it to his tea. The truth was that Wes wasn't really sure how to face Fred after having so abysmally failed her. He was just as anxious to escape as she was, at least he thought she was anxious to escape but he should have know that with Fred it is best to expect the unexpected.
"No!" she shouted and then looked away. "I mean you do-on't ha-ave to go. I mean it really would be rude of me to make you leave and then I would feel really bad about it and have to write down why I felt bad about it on my walls, you know so that I will be able to remember that I felt bad in the first place, because it really does seem to help when I write it down, but then again I am running out of wall space and Angel says I don't need to write everything down in the first place. So please…stay," she said and this time she looked at him. A wry grin curved his mouth.
"It would be very ungentlemanly of me to refuse such a request from a lady. Perhaps you would like to join me in a cup of tea?" he asked and brought down another mug. This one was almost a match to the one he had previously brought down, but it said Coffee is a Vision Girl's best friend. Fred seemed a bit unsure at first but then she nodded. He smiled and fixed them both a cup of raspberry flavored tea adding a bit of cream and sugar to Fred's at her request. At her fist sip she sighed in contentment.
"I remember this. I tried to make this one day in Pylea but the berries I found just ended up making me really sick. So I never really tried it again." She sipped the hot beverage again and smiled. Wes felt that smile hit him in the gut like a sledgehammer and he started coughing as his tea took a wrong path on the way to his stomach. Fred just gave him a concerned look and hit him on the back.
"Are you all right?" she drawled. It was a cute drawl with just the slightest hint of Texas apparent in it.
"Yes I'm quite all right. Thank you," he replied after getting a measure of control. He then looked at the smiling girl before him and said what was really on his mind.
"Fred," he started hesitantly, "Fred I wanted to apologize to you for tonight. Cordelia and I really thought…well that is to say we didn't really know…what I mean is…" She cut him off.
"I-It's ok Wesley. It's not like it w-was your fault. What happened I mean. B-Bad things just h-happen around m-me. People get hurt-t and I don-n't mean for them too," she stuttered. Wesley just looked at her stunned and with a dawning realization.
"Fred is that what you think? That all the bad things that happened to you are your fault?" She didn't answer but nodded. "That's absolute rubbish," he dismissed which caused a flash of fire in her eyes. Something which he would never expect to see in her.
"How would you know? In Pylea every time I befriended another cow…human, th-they got their heads blown off or they were used as-as the main course for the feast of the twelve moons. Here I come out of my room and something is attacking Angel or shooting at you and Cordelia. Bad th-things just happen when I am around. The monsters follow me," she stuttered and hugged herself. Wesley just looked at the girl before him, unable to speak for a moment. He then looked, really looked at Fred and tried to picture this timid young girl hunted and tortured, used as a beast of burden for five years of her life. His tea turned in his stomach again. These were the kinds of thoughts that he usually tried to avoid in regards to Fred because it made him what to go back to Pylea and kill everything that had ever hurt her and then set them ablaze. With effort he swallowed his rage and made sure to avoid her eyes.
"Fred I apologize, which I seem to be doing rather a lot. You are right of course, I don't know what happened to you and around you during your captivity and I can't even remotely imagine what it was like for you. I do know that you showed remarkable courage earlier this evening and if anything the situation was my fault not yours. It was my duty to find out who had been terrorizing the harmless species of demons and I failed in my duty. So I assure you Fred that if tonight was anyone's fault it was most assuredly mine." And Gunn's he added to himself in a bitter acknowledgement of his anger towards his friend, but it was best not to go down that path. For a moment the young physicist didn't say anything she just study his profile in the wan light of the kitchen. Wesley didn't quite know what to make of this silence so he didn't try to fill it with his prattle. Instead it was Fred who broke the stillness with her soft voice.
"I would have killed him you know," she said earnestly. Wesley didn't respond. "I mean he was going to kill everyone in the room and I knew that no o-one r-really thinks I'm much of a threat but he was going to kill us all." She was looking at him again with those amazing large eyes; eyes that made him feel ashamed and protective all at once.
"I know. I'm sorry I put you in such a position," Wes answered. His words were tortured. And he was sorry. He had seen the cornered animal look in her eyes when she had aimed the crossbow at the Gio's neck. She was a survivor and she was resourceful and he hated himself for putting her in a position where she had to be either. They both silently sipped their tea for a few moments lost in their own thoughts. It scared him sometimes to imagine where Fred went when she was quiet. He knew that it wasn't a very good place. He knew because he had one day, very inadvertently, seen the scars on her lower back. It was during the time when Angel had gone off to the monastery to mourn Buffy's death. It had been his turn to check on Fred and he caught her just as she was coming out of the shower. Her back had been to him and he had only peeked in the door to see if she was all right. Wes had seen more than he had bargained for, among the glimpse had been her healed wounds. It was a sight he wasn't soon likely to forget and never told another soul about.
"Fred…I…well that is to say we all want you to feel comfortable with us…to trust us even though I know you really have no reason to do any such thing. Still I feel that maybe tonight was a mistake and that perhaps we shouldn't be pushing you back into the world. I…we…that is Cordelia and I are very sorry for…we're just sorry. It was unfair..it was," he said and turned away from her. Fred didn't really say anything for a moment, she then came up to him and turned him back toward her. Puzzled Wesley allowed her to do so.
"I appreciate w-what y-ou all are trying to do f-for me and I-I realize that I have a long way t-to go before I get the click," she said frowning.
"The click?" Wes questioned.
"You k-know that place in your head that makes everything come together. The place where you understand everything again and it doesn't seem s-so alien. I almost felt normal tonight," she finished softly, which only served to make Wesley feel even more wretched.
"Oh Fred…I…I don't know what to say really." They relapsed into silence. "It will come Fred, I promise you that it will come. And if you need anything or I can do anything to help all you need do is ask." After he was done Fred gave him a very thoughtful look. He could almost see the scientist she should have had the chance to become staring back at him.
"You really are a very nice man," she said, then stood on her tiptoes, and gently brushed her soft lips across his cheek. Wesley sucked in a breath and blushed. "Thank you for the lovely evening and the tea and for saving my life tonight. I hope we can all go again sometime." Fred then turned and fled back to her room leaving him to stare after her. He smiled.
"I think perhaps we all might have underestimated you," he said softly, amazed by her strength. With one smile, and a few soft-spoken words from Fred, he felt his anger at the powers that be dissolve into night air. There really was no doubt about it, she was strong. Much stronger than she looked. He had a feeling that this slim, ethereal sprite they had rescued from Pylea was going to change everything that he, Angel, Gunn, and Cordelia had become together. Here they stood; brain, brawn, hero and heart…and just maybe their soul. Every single one of them an outcaste every where else in the world but here. It just goes to show that you really can't judge a book by its cover or an outcaste by its stripes.
Document created with wvWare/wvWare version 0.6.7
-->