Hi there ladies and gents. I know it's been a while but if you look at some
of my reviews...well, I didn't feel to encouraged to put up the rest of my
story. But I've just thought to myself that it shouldn't stop me because
there are people who do like my story. So this is for you people out there
who so like it. I'm truly sorry for the long wait, Nicola xxx (b.t.w the
story was finished before book 5, I can't remember what things will be
wrong, but there will be something)
22.Valentines and First Kisses
The girls of Gryffindor woke up late the next day as it was a Sunday. Serena and Lily were sat in their pyjama's at 12:00 doing their charms homework on Serena's bed when Alaine came into the dormitory with a massive grin plastered on her usually shy face.
"You'll never guess what!" Alaine said, her voice bouncing with mad excitement.
"Go on Alaine, surprise us," Lily said laughing, it seemed that Alaine's excitement was infectious. Nobody had ever seen Alaine this confident and worked up before, so it must have been good.
"They're holding a Valentines day Ball! I'm soo excited, I don't know what to wear. I hope I get asked to go by someone, I just can't believe it! I love Valentines day!"
"I hate Valentines day," Serena said, putting a damper on the spirits of everybody. "It's the worst day of the year."
"Why?" Alaine asked, "I think it's the best day of the year, next to birthdays of course!"
"That's just it, Valentines day is my birthday. Birthday's without family aren't that great. You don't get any cards. A lot of people don't expect to get a card on Valentines day, but they do on their birthday. Imagine how I feel, when I don't get either."
"Well this year will be different!" Lily said enthusiastically, "Your bound to get a load of Valentines day cards anyway, I might just casually let it slip to a few people that it's your birthday too. There can't be any harm in that!"
"No don't tell anybody, leave it. I don't care if I don't get any birthday cards. I don't want any." Serena said quietly.
Lily saw the look on her face and didn't push it any further, "Okay then"
"Glad that's sorted!" then Alaine's face fell, "When can we get dresses? There isn't a Hogsmeade weekend until March!"
Lily's eyes lit up in delight, "Back in a minute" and with that she ran down the dormitory stairs and within literally a minute she was back upstairs. "Everybody get dressed, we're going to Hogsmeade!"
After finding the one eyed witch (thanks to the courtesy of the Marauders) it was not long before the girls were in Hogsmeade shopping for the perfect dresses, making Lily try on Bright pink dresses just to see how awful she would look (red head + pink = CLASH!). After the girls had finally bought all of their dresses they headed to The Three Broomsticks for a glass of butterbeer each. Here, Alaine and Serena told Lily about Severus and Serena's new found liking for him.
"You are joking aren't you!" Lily said laughingly, "A) I thought you liked Sirius B) He is a Slytherin and C) I don't bloody like him!"
"God you are so narrow minded. He is really nice when you get to know him," She saw the 'you must be joking' look on Lily's face, "Honestly! He's real nice. And in answer to your points, just because I like Severus does not mean I don't like Sirius. Also, you are supposed to treat a person as an individual, not as a house name. Never judge a book by its cover! I don't care whether you like him either, you don't know him."
Lily just smiled at her and drank the last of her butterbeer, "It's okay, don't get defensive. I don't care who you like and don't like. I will support all your decisions" Serena smiled gratefully at her, "Even the stupid ones!" Serena just laughed it off. She was not going to win this argument.
It was the day before the Ball and everybody was partnered up to go with someone. Lily was going with Amos Diggory, a seventh year, as James had decided to go with a 'Mindless Bimbo Blonde' as Lily so kindly put it. Alaine was going with Peter who she felt sorry for because he hadn't managed to find a date. Sirius was going with the 'Mindless Bimbo Blonde's' best friend. Serena had been asked to go to the Ball by Severus so she decided to take him up on his offer. Even though she had a niggling in her stomach, telling her that it was a bad idea. Remus was going with a severely clever Ravenclaw who had beat him at chess. He thought this was an excellent quality in the girl, so he asked her to accompany him.
Finally it was Valentines Day and Serena had received a good few cards, which made her smile. She had only received two birthday cards though. From Lily and Alaine. It was five o'clock when the girls went upstairs to get ready for the Ball. It would start at 7:00.
All of the Gryffindors had decided to meet in their common room and walk together to meet their dates. The boys were stood at the foot of the stairs. Strongly reminding them of the last Ball. All the girls came down together laughing and smiling at each other. Alaine was wearing pale blue, she looked summery and absolutely stunning, her dress moved when she walked. Lily was wearing dark Green, looking very natural and calm, wearing an elfish hairstyle. Serena had opted for Black corseted making her look about three years older than she really was. Serena, feeling uncomfortable at the stares she was receiving from the common room felt she had to say something
"Erm...don't you think we should get going? We don't want to miss the start," she then grabbed the other two girls by their hands and lead the way out of the common room and into the corridor. She felt someone walking beside her.
"You look nice, Serena," Sirius said smiling at her. He was wearing black, which went perfectly with his slightly shaggy hair.
"So do you," she said smiling, she didn't know why but she felt she had to say something to Sirius. Their silence was becoming uncomfortable. "We both chose to wear black, funny."
"Perfect couple," Sirius said laughingly, Serena noticeably blanched. Perfect couple? "Er...are you okay?"
"Sure Sirius, I'm fine. You'll have to save me a dance later, after what's her name..."
"Leila"
"Okay, I have to go now, meet Severus. See you later Sirius," she turned a corner and headed off towards the Slytherin Common Room. Severus told her to meet him outside of their common room. She turned the corner and he was stood waiting for her. Serena almost laughed as she noticed he was wearing trademark Slytherin robes of green with a silver hem. They did look very nice though, Severus almost looked regal.
"Hi, I'm here," Severus smiled at her broadly. He obviously thought she looked spectacular. He handed her a red rose and she smiled appreciatively.
"Shame it isn't as beautiful as you are," Serena smiled again but this time her smile was rather fake. That line was so corny she thought to herself, but at least she knew he meant it. He then offered her his arm and they walked to the great hall. The large tables had been removed and now there were only a few smaller ones on the out side of the hall as to leave more room for dancing. The music struck up almost at once and the couple went onto the dance floor. It turned out that Severus wasn't the best of dancers but the two had a good time anyway. After a couple of songs Severus took Serena outside into a beautiful garden where he sat her down on a bench. After a while of talking Severus noticed her necklace.
"Wow, your necklace is really beautiful. Where did you get that from?" asked Severus who was examining the necklace, which at the moment was purple. This meant that she would have a hard decision to make (she had bought the book that told her all of the colours and what they meant in her mood stone)
"Somebody gave it to me, I'm not sure who though, it was from a secret admirer, they got me a ring to match it," she was just about to show him her ring when he spoke.
"I know," Serena looked at him, confused.
"What do you mean, you know?"
"It...it was me, I sent you the necklace and the ring. I'm Ed," Serena couldn't believe it. Out of all the people she didn't think Severus was that sort of person, a romantic!
"Well...I...I thank you, they are beautiful, but, they must have cost you a fortune!" she said, still shocked.
"That doesn't matter. You see the thing is Serena I sort of wanted to ask you something. I was wondering if you might want to, you know, go out with me?"
Serena noticed the sincere look in his shiny black eyes. What should she do? She liked Severus yes, he was funny, kind and he really liked her. But a little thought kept niggling in the back of her mind. What about Sirius? She knew she wanted Sirius so badly, but that didn't seem like it was going to happen, and Severus genuinely liked her. She had always wanted her first kiss to be with Sirius though. Could she go out with Severus and not kiss him, sure she could put it off for a while but she was bound to have to do it! Serena looked into his black eyes again, they looked so hopeful, as if they were pleading with her to say yes, so she did.
"Yes, that would be nice," he was just about to kiss her when her defence mechanism came into action. "I have to go now, and see Lily, I haven't talked to her all night," and with that she jumped off the bench and headed for the main hall. Spotting her stood in a corner talking to Alaine.
"I need help!" she said to them quietly, "Severus asked me to go out with him and I said yes, but now I know I've made a mistake, I should have said no. I thought I liked him, but I don't. I was just so flattered that somebody liked me. What am I going to do?" she looked at them pleadingly.
"Hide for a while?" Alaine said, "Go to the Common Room, have some time to think about it."
"That sounds like a good idea, I might be able to think of a way to let him down gently," in her mind though, she seriously doubted that that would be possible. "See you guys later, have fun!" and with that she walked out of the Great Hall and headed for the Common Room.
Maybe she could write him a letter, she thought as she sat in a big red arm chair, but then again, he would probably just think it was Sirius and James playing a joke on him. Probably the only way she would be able to let him down was to his face. She supposed it wouldn't be too bad, if she got him alone and told him why....but then again, she couldn't really tell him why. After all, what was the point in bringing Sirius into the equation? It would only make Severus more bitter. Severus would also think that she really hated him if she called it off the next day. She had to wait a while, at least a couple of weeks, or until he actually gave her a real reason to dump him. Just then Serena heard a movement at the portrait hole, she saw a figure clothed in black enter into the room.
"Hiya Sirius," she said, "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with Leila?"
"Yeah, but I saw you come up here so I wondered what was wrong. So...what's wrong, I swear down, if it's Snape I'll knock his greasy head off his shoulders." Sirius went to sit down next to Serena.
"Well, Severus sorta asked me to go out with him." Sirius started laughing.
"Was he really upset when you told him no? I would have loved to see the look on his face when you turned him down!"
"Erm...well...you see, I didn't exactly turn him down. I'm going out with him," Sirius' eyes widened with shock, "But I think I made a mistake! I like him and everything yeah, but there's been something knocking at the back of my mind for ages." Sirius looked puzzled but Serena wasn't going to elaborate. "I mean, I haven't even kissed anyone before, and to be truthful, I wasn't really expecting my first kiss to come from him. I can't exactly go out with him and never kiss him though, that would be weird. I would have to avoid him all the time. What can I do?"
"That's easy, dump him!" he said, "You're too good for him anyway, you're of a higher class."
"So who exactly is in my class then? Because I just don't know! People are telling me one thing then saying the other. Before this year I would have never even dreamt I would be going out with Severus Snape, or anybody for that matter. You know why? Because I was lower class then. People didn't see me as a girl. They saw me as a homework help. In fact they didn't even see me as that, I was invisible, and right now I feel overwhelmed. I've never had attention before, and now I can't cope with it. How exactly do I dump Severus, huh? I've never done anything like that in my life!"
"Just...tell him. He'll get over it. But Serena, honestly, you are way too good for him," Sirius grabbed her hand, "You are such a wonderful person, I don't want you to get hurt. He will hurt you, I know it. That's just the way he is."
Serena looked into Sirius' eyes. Big brown eyes.
"I..." Serena began, but Sirius cut her off with a kiss. She felt tingles travel through her whole body, it was as if she had just woken. When they pulled apart Serena looked at Sirius first with shock, and then with anger. She remembered Severus' words at the Quidditch match. 'Black has a Vendetta against me'
"You...I can't believe you would stoop so low! The only reason you kissed me was because of him isn't it? You would use one of your best friends just to get back at your enemy?" Serena yelled.
"I don't know what you mean!"
"Don't you dare patronise me, Sirius Black. The only reason you kissed me was because you wanted to ruin Severus' relationship! You wanted to take what was his! Well you know what? That isn't going to happen! I'm going to stay with Severus and we're going to make things work. I won't be part of your game, Sirius! Not anymore. Severus really likes me, I'm sure of that. I'll learn to love him. You on the other hand, you have never liked me, so why start playing games now? You know what? If I never speak to you again it will be way too soon!"
"Serena!" Sirius shouted as she stormed out of the room. Sirius had just kissed her, but she knew it was only to get at Severus, she just knew it! Serena entered the Ballroom again and spotted Severus at the other side of the room. She quickly walked over to him and sat beside him. He put his arm round her and she felt a chill go down her spine, but not a pleasant one. She would have to get used to this, she would just have to.
The next few weeks were awful for Serena. She wasn't speaking to Sirius and Severus was becoming increasingly clingy. He wouldn't leave her alone and she was beginning to become annoyed with him.
"What am I gonna do Lil?" she asked as they were sat at the dinner table, "I do like him a bit, but more as a friend! If I dump him though, he won't want to be my friend. He's just so possessive I really don't like it, he sometimes scares me, you know? He knows where I am all the time, and he always wants to touch me and hold me."
"I hate to tell you this Serena but boyfriends generally want to do that. You only notice these things as bad things because you don't want him. If the love of your life was like this with you, or at least someone you really liked, then you wouldn't be feeling this way. You would get a tingle every time they touched you, and you would want to be held by them all the time. I hate to say this Serena, but you really need to get rid of him."
The worst thing was, Serena knew Lily was right. She thought she could learn to love Severus but it really wasn't working. It was obvious that he was obsessed by her, she just didn't know how to deal with the situation. Just then Sirius and James came into the hall and sat at the table. Serena promptly stood up to leave but was cut short.
"You can't keep doing this Serena! I haven't done anything wrong!" Sirius said. Serena looked at him in shock, it was the first time he had really attempted to fight his own cause.
"Yes you have! You've used me in your little fight to get at Severus! It isn't on, I do have feelings you know! But you wouldn't care about that, you just don't care!" Serena was fired with rage and was headed to the doors when she heard Sirius' voice again.
"Your wrong! I do care, I care more than you know. I care about you!" The whole hall went silent and Serena turned around. Sirius was stood up... and so was Severus. She didn't know what to do, Severus looked confused and angry at Sirius and Sirius was shaking with frustration. Serena turned and ran; she couldn't cope anymore. She ran all the way to the owlery, she figured that nobody would find her there, she needed some time to think.
She wasn't in doubt anymore, Sirius really did like her. She saw it in his eyes, that same look that she used to give him before Severus had stolen her. She just couldn't hurt Severus though, it wasn't fair on him. She would have to tell Sirius that she was going to stay with Severus. It was the only way nobody would be hurt, after all, Sirius seemed to have crushes all the time, it wasn't as if he would be hurt by her rejection. That sounded terrible even in her mind. She was going to reject Sirius, the one who she wanted more than anybody else. She had made her decision though and now it was time to face the music. She made her way down to the hall and opened the grand doors promptly making her way to sit with Severus at the Slytherin table and giving him a kiss on the cheek. He seemed pleased enough with this and turned to give Sirius a superior look. Serena couldn't turn around and look at him though. She knew that a tear would fall as soon as she did.
"So what are we doing tonight?" Severus asked, feeling much more confident than he had half an hour ago.
"I am supposed to be doing my Charms homework with Lily and Alaine tonight. I thought I told you, didn't I?"
"But you said you would see me! Honestly it seems like I never see you anymore, you're always with Lily and Alaine. Are they more important than me, huh? Look, I can understand that they are your best friends but I want to see you Serena, why can't we be together more often?" Severus was close to Serena now, too close for her comfort.
"Okay, I will see you tonight, but tomorrow I am doing my charms with Lily and Alaine, okay?" she asked.
"Sure," he said happily, "so what shall we do, I think we should go to the Slytherin common room. You can meet some of my friends."
"But Severus, I'm a Gryffindor, I'm not allowed in the Slytherin Common Room. Anyway, your friends don't like me, so what's the point?"
"Fine," he didn't look very pleased, "We'll just go to the Gardens then."
Serena didn't like this idea either, that meant that they would be alone and she could never find anything to talk about around him. She usually just listened to whatever he had to say. She just nodded though, there was no point in upsetting him. "I have to go, see you later." She tried to leave but she felt him grab her arm and turn her around for a kiss, reluctantly she kissed him. She realised that this lie would not be an easy one to keep up.
At around seven o'clock Serena went to meet Severus at the Gardens. She sat on the bench where they usually met and waited. It was the longest five minutes of her life. Thoughts kept entering her head, getting twisted and mixed up with each other.
She was going to break his heart. Broken hearts weren't easy to mend but it was easier than living a lie. She took off her necklace and her ring and looked at them in the palm of her hand. They were so beautiful, maybe he could give them to somebody else who deserved them. She didn't want his love, so she wasn't going to keep his jewels.
Just then she heard a rustling in the bushes and she saw Severus' tall dark figure coming towards her. He sat down next to her and smiled. He was about to go to kiss her when she stopped him.
"Severus, there is something we need to talk about. Something I've been meaning to talk about for a while now. You see, I don't think we should be together anymore," she could almost see the pain in his eyes as her knife delved into his heart. "You must understand, I love you so much, but as a friend. If I were to be with you, I would dislike you and that is not something I am prepared to let happen. I just don't feel that we are right together. God knows I've tried to make it work but I know in my heart that it's wrong. I am so...sorry." This really was the hardest word to say, for she knew that no apology would suffice to make him feel any better, she opened his palm and placed the jewellery in it. She stood up slowly, looked into his sad eyes and then walked towards the castle.
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Yeah, review. Do whatever you want, lol. I hate this story now. People where nasty to me because of it. But that's okay. Just review : )
22.Valentines and First Kisses
The girls of Gryffindor woke up late the next day as it was a Sunday. Serena and Lily were sat in their pyjama's at 12:00 doing their charms homework on Serena's bed when Alaine came into the dormitory with a massive grin plastered on her usually shy face.
"You'll never guess what!" Alaine said, her voice bouncing with mad excitement.
"Go on Alaine, surprise us," Lily said laughing, it seemed that Alaine's excitement was infectious. Nobody had ever seen Alaine this confident and worked up before, so it must have been good.
"They're holding a Valentines day Ball! I'm soo excited, I don't know what to wear. I hope I get asked to go by someone, I just can't believe it! I love Valentines day!"
"I hate Valentines day," Serena said, putting a damper on the spirits of everybody. "It's the worst day of the year."
"Why?" Alaine asked, "I think it's the best day of the year, next to birthdays of course!"
"That's just it, Valentines day is my birthday. Birthday's without family aren't that great. You don't get any cards. A lot of people don't expect to get a card on Valentines day, but they do on their birthday. Imagine how I feel, when I don't get either."
"Well this year will be different!" Lily said enthusiastically, "Your bound to get a load of Valentines day cards anyway, I might just casually let it slip to a few people that it's your birthday too. There can't be any harm in that!"
"No don't tell anybody, leave it. I don't care if I don't get any birthday cards. I don't want any." Serena said quietly.
Lily saw the look on her face and didn't push it any further, "Okay then"
"Glad that's sorted!" then Alaine's face fell, "When can we get dresses? There isn't a Hogsmeade weekend until March!"
Lily's eyes lit up in delight, "Back in a minute" and with that she ran down the dormitory stairs and within literally a minute she was back upstairs. "Everybody get dressed, we're going to Hogsmeade!"
After finding the one eyed witch (thanks to the courtesy of the Marauders) it was not long before the girls were in Hogsmeade shopping for the perfect dresses, making Lily try on Bright pink dresses just to see how awful she would look (red head + pink = CLASH!). After the girls had finally bought all of their dresses they headed to The Three Broomsticks for a glass of butterbeer each. Here, Alaine and Serena told Lily about Severus and Serena's new found liking for him.
"You are joking aren't you!" Lily said laughingly, "A) I thought you liked Sirius B) He is a Slytherin and C) I don't bloody like him!"
"God you are so narrow minded. He is really nice when you get to know him," She saw the 'you must be joking' look on Lily's face, "Honestly! He's real nice. And in answer to your points, just because I like Severus does not mean I don't like Sirius. Also, you are supposed to treat a person as an individual, not as a house name. Never judge a book by its cover! I don't care whether you like him either, you don't know him."
Lily just smiled at her and drank the last of her butterbeer, "It's okay, don't get defensive. I don't care who you like and don't like. I will support all your decisions" Serena smiled gratefully at her, "Even the stupid ones!" Serena just laughed it off. She was not going to win this argument.
It was the day before the Ball and everybody was partnered up to go with someone. Lily was going with Amos Diggory, a seventh year, as James had decided to go with a 'Mindless Bimbo Blonde' as Lily so kindly put it. Alaine was going with Peter who she felt sorry for because he hadn't managed to find a date. Sirius was going with the 'Mindless Bimbo Blonde's' best friend. Serena had been asked to go to the Ball by Severus so she decided to take him up on his offer. Even though she had a niggling in her stomach, telling her that it was a bad idea. Remus was going with a severely clever Ravenclaw who had beat him at chess. He thought this was an excellent quality in the girl, so he asked her to accompany him.
Finally it was Valentines Day and Serena had received a good few cards, which made her smile. She had only received two birthday cards though. From Lily and Alaine. It was five o'clock when the girls went upstairs to get ready for the Ball. It would start at 7:00.
All of the Gryffindors had decided to meet in their common room and walk together to meet their dates. The boys were stood at the foot of the stairs. Strongly reminding them of the last Ball. All the girls came down together laughing and smiling at each other. Alaine was wearing pale blue, she looked summery and absolutely stunning, her dress moved when she walked. Lily was wearing dark Green, looking very natural and calm, wearing an elfish hairstyle. Serena had opted for Black corseted making her look about three years older than she really was. Serena, feeling uncomfortable at the stares she was receiving from the common room felt she had to say something
"Erm...don't you think we should get going? We don't want to miss the start," she then grabbed the other two girls by their hands and lead the way out of the common room and into the corridor. She felt someone walking beside her.
"You look nice, Serena," Sirius said smiling at her. He was wearing black, which went perfectly with his slightly shaggy hair.
"So do you," she said smiling, she didn't know why but she felt she had to say something to Sirius. Their silence was becoming uncomfortable. "We both chose to wear black, funny."
"Perfect couple," Sirius said laughingly, Serena noticeably blanched. Perfect couple? "Er...are you okay?"
"Sure Sirius, I'm fine. You'll have to save me a dance later, after what's her name..."
"Leila"
"Okay, I have to go now, meet Severus. See you later Sirius," she turned a corner and headed off towards the Slytherin Common Room. Severus told her to meet him outside of their common room. She turned the corner and he was stood waiting for her. Serena almost laughed as she noticed he was wearing trademark Slytherin robes of green with a silver hem. They did look very nice though, Severus almost looked regal.
"Hi, I'm here," Severus smiled at her broadly. He obviously thought she looked spectacular. He handed her a red rose and she smiled appreciatively.
"Shame it isn't as beautiful as you are," Serena smiled again but this time her smile was rather fake. That line was so corny she thought to herself, but at least she knew he meant it. He then offered her his arm and they walked to the great hall. The large tables had been removed and now there were only a few smaller ones on the out side of the hall as to leave more room for dancing. The music struck up almost at once and the couple went onto the dance floor. It turned out that Severus wasn't the best of dancers but the two had a good time anyway. After a couple of songs Severus took Serena outside into a beautiful garden where he sat her down on a bench. After a while of talking Severus noticed her necklace.
"Wow, your necklace is really beautiful. Where did you get that from?" asked Severus who was examining the necklace, which at the moment was purple. This meant that she would have a hard decision to make (she had bought the book that told her all of the colours and what they meant in her mood stone)
"Somebody gave it to me, I'm not sure who though, it was from a secret admirer, they got me a ring to match it," she was just about to show him her ring when he spoke.
"I know," Serena looked at him, confused.
"What do you mean, you know?"
"It...it was me, I sent you the necklace and the ring. I'm Ed," Serena couldn't believe it. Out of all the people she didn't think Severus was that sort of person, a romantic!
"Well...I...I thank you, they are beautiful, but, they must have cost you a fortune!" she said, still shocked.
"That doesn't matter. You see the thing is Serena I sort of wanted to ask you something. I was wondering if you might want to, you know, go out with me?"
Serena noticed the sincere look in his shiny black eyes. What should she do? She liked Severus yes, he was funny, kind and he really liked her. But a little thought kept niggling in the back of her mind. What about Sirius? She knew she wanted Sirius so badly, but that didn't seem like it was going to happen, and Severus genuinely liked her. She had always wanted her first kiss to be with Sirius though. Could she go out with Severus and not kiss him, sure she could put it off for a while but she was bound to have to do it! Serena looked into his black eyes again, they looked so hopeful, as if they were pleading with her to say yes, so she did.
"Yes, that would be nice," he was just about to kiss her when her defence mechanism came into action. "I have to go now, and see Lily, I haven't talked to her all night," and with that she jumped off the bench and headed for the main hall. Spotting her stood in a corner talking to Alaine.
"I need help!" she said to them quietly, "Severus asked me to go out with him and I said yes, but now I know I've made a mistake, I should have said no. I thought I liked him, but I don't. I was just so flattered that somebody liked me. What am I going to do?" she looked at them pleadingly.
"Hide for a while?" Alaine said, "Go to the Common Room, have some time to think about it."
"That sounds like a good idea, I might be able to think of a way to let him down gently," in her mind though, she seriously doubted that that would be possible. "See you guys later, have fun!" and with that she walked out of the Great Hall and headed for the Common Room.
Maybe she could write him a letter, she thought as she sat in a big red arm chair, but then again, he would probably just think it was Sirius and James playing a joke on him. Probably the only way she would be able to let him down was to his face. She supposed it wouldn't be too bad, if she got him alone and told him why....but then again, she couldn't really tell him why. After all, what was the point in bringing Sirius into the equation? It would only make Severus more bitter. Severus would also think that she really hated him if she called it off the next day. She had to wait a while, at least a couple of weeks, or until he actually gave her a real reason to dump him. Just then Serena heard a movement at the portrait hole, she saw a figure clothed in black enter into the room.
"Hiya Sirius," she said, "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with Leila?"
"Yeah, but I saw you come up here so I wondered what was wrong. So...what's wrong, I swear down, if it's Snape I'll knock his greasy head off his shoulders." Sirius went to sit down next to Serena.
"Well, Severus sorta asked me to go out with him." Sirius started laughing.
"Was he really upset when you told him no? I would have loved to see the look on his face when you turned him down!"
"Erm...well...you see, I didn't exactly turn him down. I'm going out with him," Sirius' eyes widened with shock, "But I think I made a mistake! I like him and everything yeah, but there's been something knocking at the back of my mind for ages." Sirius looked puzzled but Serena wasn't going to elaborate. "I mean, I haven't even kissed anyone before, and to be truthful, I wasn't really expecting my first kiss to come from him. I can't exactly go out with him and never kiss him though, that would be weird. I would have to avoid him all the time. What can I do?"
"That's easy, dump him!" he said, "You're too good for him anyway, you're of a higher class."
"So who exactly is in my class then? Because I just don't know! People are telling me one thing then saying the other. Before this year I would have never even dreamt I would be going out with Severus Snape, or anybody for that matter. You know why? Because I was lower class then. People didn't see me as a girl. They saw me as a homework help. In fact they didn't even see me as that, I was invisible, and right now I feel overwhelmed. I've never had attention before, and now I can't cope with it. How exactly do I dump Severus, huh? I've never done anything like that in my life!"
"Just...tell him. He'll get over it. But Serena, honestly, you are way too good for him," Sirius grabbed her hand, "You are such a wonderful person, I don't want you to get hurt. He will hurt you, I know it. That's just the way he is."
Serena looked into Sirius' eyes. Big brown eyes.
"I..." Serena began, but Sirius cut her off with a kiss. She felt tingles travel through her whole body, it was as if she had just woken. When they pulled apart Serena looked at Sirius first with shock, and then with anger. She remembered Severus' words at the Quidditch match. 'Black has a Vendetta against me'
"You...I can't believe you would stoop so low! The only reason you kissed me was because of him isn't it? You would use one of your best friends just to get back at your enemy?" Serena yelled.
"I don't know what you mean!"
"Don't you dare patronise me, Sirius Black. The only reason you kissed me was because you wanted to ruin Severus' relationship! You wanted to take what was his! Well you know what? That isn't going to happen! I'm going to stay with Severus and we're going to make things work. I won't be part of your game, Sirius! Not anymore. Severus really likes me, I'm sure of that. I'll learn to love him. You on the other hand, you have never liked me, so why start playing games now? You know what? If I never speak to you again it will be way too soon!"
"Serena!" Sirius shouted as she stormed out of the room. Sirius had just kissed her, but she knew it was only to get at Severus, she just knew it! Serena entered the Ballroom again and spotted Severus at the other side of the room. She quickly walked over to him and sat beside him. He put his arm round her and she felt a chill go down her spine, but not a pleasant one. She would have to get used to this, she would just have to.
The next few weeks were awful for Serena. She wasn't speaking to Sirius and Severus was becoming increasingly clingy. He wouldn't leave her alone and she was beginning to become annoyed with him.
"What am I gonna do Lil?" she asked as they were sat at the dinner table, "I do like him a bit, but more as a friend! If I dump him though, he won't want to be my friend. He's just so possessive I really don't like it, he sometimes scares me, you know? He knows where I am all the time, and he always wants to touch me and hold me."
"I hate to tell you this Serena but boyfriends generally want to do that. You only notice these things as bad things because you don't want him. If the love of your life was like this with you, or at least someone you really liked, then you wouldn't be feeling this way. You would get a tingle every time they touched you, and you would want to be held by them all the time. I hate to say this Serena, but you really need to get rid of him."
The worst thing was, Serena knew Lily was right. She thought she could learn to love Severus but it really wasn't working. It was obvious that he was obsessed by her, she just didn't know how to deal with the situation. Just then Sirius and James came into the hall and sat at the table. Serena promptly stood up to leave but was cut short.
"You can't keep doing this Serena! I haven't done anything wrong!" Sirius said. Serena looked at him in shock, it was the first time he had really attempted to fight his own cause.
"Yes you have! You've used me in your little fight to get at Severus! It isn't on, I do have feelings you know! But you wouldn't care about that, you just don't care!" Serena was fired with rage and was headed to the doors when she heard Sirius' voice again.
"Your wrong! I do care, I care more than you know. I care about you!" The whole hall went silent and Serena turned around. Sirius was stood up... and so was Severus. She didn't know what to do, Severus looked confused and angry at Sirius and Sirius was shaking with frustration. Serena turned and ran; she couldn't cope anymore. She ran all the way to the owlery, she figured that nobody would find her there, she needed some time to think.
She wasn't in doubt anymore, Sirius really did like her. She saw it in his eyes, that same look that she used to give him before Severus had stolen her. She just couldn't hurt Severus though, it wasn't fair on him. She would have to tell Sirius that she was going to stay with Severus. It was the only way nobody would be hurt, after all, Sirius seemed to have crushes all the time, it wasn't as if he would be hurt by her rejection. That sounded terrible even in her mind. She was going to reject Sirius, the one who she wanted more than anybody else. She had made her decision though and now it was time to face the music. She made her way down to the hall and opened the grand doors promptly making her way to sit with Severus at the Slytherin table and giving him a kiss on the cheek. He seemed pleased enough with this and turned to give Sirius a superior look. Serena couldn't turn around and look at him though. She knew that a tear would fall as soon as she did.
"So what are we doing tonight?" Severus asked, feeling much more confident than he had half an hour ago.
"I am supposed to be doing my Charms homework with Lily and Alaine tonight. I thought I told you, didn't I?"
"But you said you would see me! Honestly it seems like I never see you anymore, you're always with Lily and Alaine. Are they more important than me, huh? Look, I can understand that they are your best friends but I want to see you Serena, why can't we be together more often?" Severus was close to Serena now, too close for her comfort.
"Okay, I will see you tonight, but tomorrow I am doing my charms with Lily and Alaine, okay?" she asked.
"Sure," he said happily, "so what shall we do, I think we should go to the Slytherin common room. You can meet some of my friends."
"But Severus, I'm a Gryffindor, I'm not allowed in the Slytherin Common Room. Anyway, your friends don't like me, so what's the point?"
"Fine," he didn't look very pleased, "We'll just go to the Gardens then."
Serena didn't like this idea either, that meant that they would be alone and she could never find anything to talk about around him. She usually just listened to whatever he had to say. She just nodded though, there was no point in upsetting him. "I have to go, see you later." She tried to leave but she felt him grab her arm and turn her around for a kiss, reluctantly she kissed him. She realised that this lie would not be an easy one to keep up.
At around seven o'clock Serena went to meet Severus at the Gardens. She sat on the bench where they usually met and waited. It was the longest five minutes of her life. Thoughts kept entering her head, getting twisted and mixed up with each other.
She was going to break his heart. Broken hearts weren't easy to mend but it was easier than living a lie. She took off her necklace and her ring and looked at them in the palm of her hand. They were so beautiful, maybe he could give them to somebody else who deserved them. She didn't want his love, so she wasn't going to keep his jewels.
Just then she heard a rustling in the bushes and she saw Severus' tall dark figure coming towards her. He sat down next to her and smiled. He was about to go to kiss her when she stopped him.
"Severus, there is something we need to talk about. Something I've been meaning to talk about for a while now. You see, I don't think we should be together anymore," she could almost see the pain in his eyes as her knife delved into his heart. "You must understand, I love you so much, but as a friend. If I were to be with you, I would dislike you and that is not something I am prepared to let happen. I just don't feel that we are right together. God knows I've tried to make it work but I know in my heart that it's wrong. I am so...sorry." This really was the hardest word to say, for she knew that no apology would suffice to make him feel any better, she opened his palm and placed the jewellery in it. She stood up slowly, looked into his sad eyes and then walked towards the castle.
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Yeah, review. Do whatever you want, lol. I hate this story now. People where nasty to me because of it. But that's okay. Just review : )