Chapter 2: WTF?!

(aka: Everyone is out of character and I like it!)

"HB!" Liz didn't bother closing the door behind her as she ran after Red, he was walking with a spring in his step. Whistling with his tail swinging behind him. It was very disconcerting.

"Red" she grabbed his arm and turned him to face her.

"Liz?" he asked, looking as though he still wasn't completely there.

"What's wrong, didn't you hear me?"

"Uh…no…I was thinking…about Bella. What's up?"

"In here…" Liz steered him into an empty room, slamming the door behind her "Red, I need to know what's wrong with you?"She stood with her arms folded as his face became even more confused than it already had been.

"What do you mean, Liz…I'm perfectl--"

"No. You're not. Something's up. Something to do with that girl…Red, I need to know exactly what happened with her…did you kiss her?"

"Amoung other things"

Liz's eyes just about popped out her head. She felt the familiar flush of heat that came when she was particularly upset and she could feel that little vein in her head pounding away. She reached instinctively for a rubber band and started snapping away, hoping to wake herself up.

She grabbed Hellboy's collar and dragged him down to her level (not an easy thing to do).

"Red…" she said in a carefully measured whisper "You didn't…You couldn't have…" she couldn't finish the sentence "You didn't have --"

"Sex" Hellboy supplied, seemingly unperturbed by her anger.

Liz nodded, suddenly mute.

"Of course"

"NO!" her voice came back full swing.

"Many times…several different positions."

"But--How? Why?"

"We're in love!"

"SHE'S SIXTEEN!"

"Age has nothing to do with true love!" Hellboy straightened, staring starry eyed into space.

"In America it does! HB, you could go to prison"

"Small price to pay…I'd spend my days thinking of Bella Jade. We'd be pen pals, and when she's old enough, conjugal visits."

Liz gagged slightly. "Red! This isn't you…this can't be you" Hellboy finally met her gaze.

"Liz, why can't you just accept that I've found true love? Why can't you be happy for me?"

"Because, c'mon Red! Listen to yourself…this isn't you, you're all--lovey dovey….what did she do to you?"

"Nothing I didn't want Liz." he moved closer to Liz, still keeping eye contact "You should be proud…I'm a new man now! She's made me better…she's made us all better, don't you see?"

Well, now that he'd mentioned it.

Something was different about Hellboy. He did look somehow better! His skin shone redder than usual, his muscles were bigger than they usually were, not by much, but enough to make a difference. His voice had changed to be as silky and flowery as the words that he kept spouting and -- OH GOD! Worst of all, the bulge in his pants was noticeably larger!

Liz whipped around to the mirror in the corner of the room, at first she didn't notice a difference in her own appearance. Than she moved closer. She was…drab. Nothing fundamental had changed about her, but somehow her appearance had been dulled. Her hair hung lank, her eyes looked dead…her skin had a slightly grayed quality. She looked plain, unmemorable.

"You see Liz…you're just blowing things way out of proportion. We're all so much better off with Bella Jade." With that Liz snapped, she turned heel and marched out of the room. She left Hellboy, again staring dreamily into space. She shut the door and jogged down the hall. She passed clusters of BPRD agents milling about, caught snatches of conversation all about Bella Jade. She reached the girls room, the door had a sort of a glow to it. There was a line of men outside, trying to build up the courage to enter. Liz pushed past them.

"Out!" she ordered Agent Manning…on his knees in front of Bella Jade, who was lounging on her bed. Liz didn't know what had been going on, nor did she want to know. Agent Manning looked confused for a second, he looked from Liz to BJ and back three times before fixing Bella with a look reminiscent of a extremely pathetic puppy dog.

"It's okay Tommy wommy…I can take care of this. Go on now." the girl said in a sickly sweet voice. Agent Manning shuffled from the room.

Liz pointed a shaky finger at the girl "What have you done?!"

"Whatever do you mean, dear Elizabeth?"

"Oh drop the act! What are you? What did you do to them?" Liz was surprised at the hysteria in her voice. She wasn't the hysterical type...something about this girl was changing her. She wasn't herself. She wasn't just different in appearance, she was becoming a completely different person the longer this girl stayed around.

"Whoever do you mean?"

"My guys! What the hell did you do with my guys?!" to Liz's surprise the girl giggled, a sound like the tinkling of bells.

"Green is not your colour, Elizabeth…"

"What?" Liz asked suddenly feeling very wrong footed

"Clearly you're jealous…" the girl stood, smoothing out her perfect clothing, her tight black bodice hugged her in all the right places, her silken purple skirt (matching her eyes exactly…of course, everything she wore seemed to match her eyes exactly, regardless of colour) hung with perfectly symmetrical folds. She had a sort of a glow encompassing her. "Who wouldn't be…" she continued, circling Liz, her currently purple eyes roving, taking in all of Liz's drab appearance. "Look at you…your clothes, your hair? Pathetic! Everything about you is wrong...wrong for Hellboy, wrong for the BPRD. Is it any wonder I was able to take your place so easily?" she laughed, the light tinkling had turned to a loud clanging that shook the room.

She moved closer, Liz and her were almost nose to nose "Compared to me…you're nothing."

WHAM!

Liz looked down at the unconscious (but somehow still stunning) form of Bella Jade LaMorte.

"Oops"