Taste Test
A Total Drama Island Story
A/N: This story takes place before Katie got voted off, because this is where I started watching the season. The challenge is this: Chef Hatchet makes the most grotesque meal, different for each camper, containing what they hate most. They eat it, or lose the point.
Disclaimer: I do not own TDI, even if I really wish I did, but I don't, so don't rub it in.
"Okay, campers!" Chris MaClean shouted to the campers and the camera men in a false, cheery voice. "You have a new challenge, perhaps the most difficult one of all."
He paused dramatically. "Come on out, Chef Hatchet." A burly black man emerged from the trees surrounding the campsite and stopped next to Chris. "Ah, the man of the day himself," Chris announced. "Today—" He got closer to the camera for his close-up. "— Chef Hatchet will make one meal for the campers. It will be the most disgusting, and maybe alive, meal these guys have ever had."
Courtney, ever the leader, stood up indignantly. "You can't do that! That food could get us extremely sick. Chef Hatchet's food is gr—" She stopped in the middle of 'gross' as the chef threw her a terrifying glare. She sat down weakly. "Chef Hatchet's food is great."
Duncan smirked. So did Chris. "Actually, Courtney I can. It's all in the papers." He held up a stack of white paper, each bearing the contestant's signature. "And don't try ripping it up. Like I said before, lawyers make lots of copies."
"Wait!" Lindsay said. "Um, like, Chris, my nutritionist said I can't have anything that like, you know, contains a lot of sugar or fat." She paused thoughtfully. "Or raw animals."
"You won't have to worry about the sugar or fat," Chris said. "I make no promises about the raw animals."
"As long as there's no sugar!" she replied brightly, satisfied.
Bridgette spoke up. "I can't eat animals. I'm a strict vegetarian. Unlike you, I care about the environment."
Chris continued as if he hadn't heard. "Well, to the mess hall in half an hour, guys. Lunch is served."
Everyone rolled their eyes at his French accent except for Lindsay who gushed, "I love foreigners!"
Back at the grounds in front Killer Bass cabin everyone was worried about the taste test. Especially Courtney. Hopefully no one would find out she was afraid of green jello…
"All right there, princess?" Duncan said, looking up from the skull he was carving into a block of bark to smirk at her.
"You just shut it," she snapped, pacing the other way.
Bridgette was equally worried but more openly so. "I just can't eat animals," she cried. "No matter how hungry I am. True if they're in the woods, I sort of freak out, but I cannot eat them."
"Don't worry," Geoff said in a laid back tone, though he was worried about what he would be eating. "I'm sure that if you can't Chris won't make you."
"Knowing Chris, I wouldn't be so sure. The Animal Kindness Society is so kicking me out if they watch this show."
"I'm sure it'll be fine, Bridge," Geoff replied.
"I hope."
Over at the Screaming Gophers things weren't much better. Of course Lindsay was cheery that there would be no sugar or fat, but Heather was talking sneeringly to Beth.
"Okay, I know we're all here to win that money and stuff," Heather said disdainfully. "But seriously, like, Chris has gone way too far. This food is totally going to have me running to the bathroom all night. Not to mention that I'm sure none of the food will be within the strict guidelines of my diet."
"But hasn't all the food you've eaten here before already done that?" Beth asked. Sometimes the food moved. If that wasn't something to keep you in the bathroom…
"Keep it in line, sister," Heather snapped. "You want to be in this alliance or not?"
"Yes!" Beth squeaked, stepping back a bit in surprise. Heather had been biting out like a rattlesnake unexpectedly a lot these days. She was really irritable.
"Good." She stalked off.
Over on the steps of the boys' cabin, Gwen and Trent were discussing stuff, just randomly, like movies and books and music. Sometimes she could get so lost in these discussions with Trent. Like in the "awake-a-thon", she had kept herself awake just thinking about Trent…
"If it isn't the two lovebirds," Heather sneered, walking past as if hoping Gwen would challenge her.
"Ignore her, Gwen," Trent said as Gwen balled her fists, wanting to stop the fight if it was coming. "Come on…uh, what's your least favorite food? In light of the events?"
"I'm not so sure I should say." Gwen glanced at a camera 'hidden', or rather, taped to a tree.
"Oh. You're right, that was dumb…" Trent trailed off. He checked his watch. "We better get going; we have to be in the mess hall in a few minutes."
The Screaming Gophers and the Killer Bass lined up on opposite sides of the mess hall, apprehensively surveying the nine silver platters on each of the tables (making a total of eighteen). Each plate had a paper name card next to it, reading the camper's name. Chris MaClean materialized in front of the camera with a smile on his face, like he was enjoying himself watching their nervous faces.
"Okay! The moment of the day, the taste test itself. The only thing I have to say is—" He chuckled menacingly. "—you guys better have stomachs of steel." He strode purposefully over to the end of the hall between the two tables and gestured to the Screaming Gopher table. "Here's the line up: Trent…" He patted the seat and Trent sat down. "Gwen…Heather…Beth…Owen…Izzy…LeShawna…Cody…Lindsay."
They all sat down simultaneously, Gwen glaring at Heather and smiling at Trent.
"Now for you Killer Bass." Chris turned to the opposing table. "Duncan…Courtney…Bridgette…Geoff…Tyler…DJ…Harold…Katie…and Sadie."
"Yay!" The BFFFLs shrieked, hi-fiving and sitting down. Courtney grudgingly sat down next to Duncan.
"Nervous, princess?" he asked, obviously enjoying himself.
"Oh, you wish," she countered, picking up the plastic spoon and fork. "Cheap producers," she muttered, examining the utensils
"All right! On my mark, everyone will open their platters, but will not eat," Chris directed. "Okay…open."
The sound of heavy tops being lifted and being set back down echoed in the mess hall. Courtney dropped her spoon and fork onto her lap, looking absolutely terrified.
Encased in a lump of green jello were a few wriggling bugs and a fish, uncooked.
"Oh my god," she whispered. Even Duncan looked shaken. There was a piece of bear on his plate, uncooked with clumps of fur still attached. A thick white-ish lumpy mush that Courtney took to be sauce, covered it. They shared a look.
"I can't eat this," they both said at the same time.
"Chris?" Duncan said, raising his voice over the sounds of campers groaning in distaste at their plates. "I don't remember the contract saying that I'd have to eat raw bear."
"Well, if you'd known, you wouldn't have come, would you, Duncan," Chris said, but his last words were covered by Owen yelling, "This looks delicious!"
Everyone stared at his plate. There was a raw chicken on it. Tyler ducked under the table and the unmistakable sounds of puking came out. Sitting on Tyler's plate was the same thing.
"Aw, poor Tyler," Lindsay cooed. Heather glared.
"Keep your eyes on the prize, Lindsay. No dating Tyler or you're out."
"I know this all looks very delicious," Chris shouted over the din of puking. "The deal is this: five bites, and you get the point. Anything less and it's Loserville for you."
"If we put it in our mouth but don't swallow, does it count?" Izzy asked.
"No, it doesn't. However, if you swallow it then throw it back up, you get the point."
"Well, can we take really small bites?" Duncan volunteered, staring hopefully at Chris.
"Duncan, man, you really shouldn't have said that. I never thought of that, but no, they've got to be real bites, not baby bites."
Courtney glared at him. "Way to go, 'princess'."
He shrugged dejectedly.
"Any more questions? No? Then on your mark…get set…GO!"
Everyone stared at him for a moment. "When I say go, I meant GO! Now!"
"Oh, right…" Izzy giggled, picking up her fork and neatly cutting off a piece of her frog and slipping it into her mouth. "Hey! This isn't that bad! Man, this challenge is a piece of —" There was a grumbling from her stomach. Izzy lurched. "Oh my gosh…"
Everyone watched as Izzy tore out of the hall, clutching her mouth.
Bridgette was relieved to see no meat on her plate, but was disgusted at the conditions of the animals on the others' plates. Chris seemed to read her mind. "Bridgette, have a peace of mind that all these animals dies of natural causes, like old age. We couldn't do anything. We were just scavengers, hunting them down."
"Okay, good…" Bridgette said, relieved. "I'm just glad to know that. By the way, Chris…what kind of leaf is this?"
Chris grinned evilly. "Oh, you'll see."
With Courtney, she was poking her green jello with her fork tentatively. Duncan scoffed at her. "Courtney, most of yours is green jello. The bugs and fish are only in the middle. Take a few bites of the jello and we're one point closer to winning."
Courtney blushed. "I just don't like jello, alright? And if this is so easy, why don't you just eat yours…" She paused. "Did you just call me by my actual name?"
"It's your name, princess. Don't get all worked up." Duncan picked up his fork. "And I will eat it." He forked up a piece of bear and after a hesitation, cut up four more pieces and speared all of them in a row onto the fork.
"Well, what are you waiting for?" Courtney snapped, though there was fear in her eyes. "Make this point, Duncan!"
"I will, pushy!" And with that, he choked down all five bites. Everyone from both sides watched as he pulled a face, but swallowed.
"And, the Killer Bass are in the lead with Duncan scoring a point!" Chris shouted to the camera.
"Duncan, you're awesome!" Courtney cried, throwing her arms around him. Then she blushed. "Uh, I mean…good work." She pulled her arms back. When she turned around, she didn't see Duncan wink at Geoff, or Geoff thumb-up him back.
"Well, here goes," Bridgette said, forking up her mysterious-leaf salad.
"Good luck," Geoff said helpfully.
"Thanks." And then she popped it into her mouth. "Two leaves down, three to go!"
Bridgette successfully ate three other leaves and the Killer Bass were in the lead by two.
"Good job, Bridge!" Geoff exclaimed, hi-fiving her.
Slowly, everyone on both sides began to eat. Owen broke all records and earned two points for eating his whole chicken. Only Heather and Lindsay had yet to eat theirs.
"Okay, there's like no way I'm eating this," Heather said, not bothering with her utensils and crossing her arms.
"Yeah, I thought there was going to be, like, salad." Lindsay sighed. "This looks fattening to me."
Gwen glared at both of them after disposing of her utensils and the rest of her food. "Okay, either you two can suck it up and eat, or one of you can go home tonight, because everyone else ate theirs."
Heather turned to her. "No way, goth girl. This was, like, not part of the deal."
"Yeah, sorry Gwen…I just can't risk my health," Lindsay said cheerily.
"Whatever," Gwen said, sitting back down. "If we lose, it's not like we're going to have any trouble deciding who gets kicked out."
"All right," Chris said, rubbing his hands together. "If Courtney eats this, then the Killer Bass win!"
Courtney made a face at the jello, but moved her fork towards the green lump. "Okay…"
"You can do it, Courtney!" Duncan said, watching her and her plate.
"Okay." She made herself take a big breath, and internally gave herself a pep talk. Okay Courtney, like we worked on. Suck it up and do it! For the Killer Bass…She gulped, then dug a bit of the gelatin out and popped it in her mouth, then held her breath so she wouldn't have to taste it. She could still feel it sliding down her throat like a frog. In a quick succession she forked four more bites and ate without too much trouble.
"And the Killer Bass win!" Chris announced. While the Screaming Gophers sulked, everyone engulfed Courtney.
"Good job, princess," Duncan said, surprisingly without a smirk.
She didn't take the princess thing too seriously. "Thanks."
"Yeah, Courtney!" Bridgette shouted.
"Alright, calm down everyone. This means the Screaming Gophers will be the ones at the campfire tonight. Everyone on the Killer Bass, you're safe…for today."
"That's long enough for me," Geoff said, grinning broadly.
At the Screaming Gopher girl's cabin, Gwen was sitting up in bed while Heather and Lindsay assumed identical positions of fixing their hair while sitting cross-legged on their beds, staring into mirrors.
"Way to go, girls," Gwen snapped. "Thanks to you, the Killer Bass are one player ahead."
"Oh, calm it, goth girl. Why're you so worried? We're the ones that didn't eat it."
"Then shouldn't you be a little more concerned?" Gwen said, hopping off her bed and slamming the door behind her.
"Off to meet Trent?" Heather shouted after her sarcastically. But she couldn't hide it, maybe she was worried…
"Who's Trent?" Lindsay asked.
Sitting around the campfire, the only ones worried about anything were Heather and Lindsay. Sure enough, when there was one marshmallow left, both Heather and Lindsay were still sitting on their logs.
"All right, guys. I know you two and Beth have an alliance, so it's really no secret that the last marshmallow goes to…" He picked up the marshmallow. "Heather."
Heather smirked and took her marshmallow from Chris. "This is just too easy," she muttered to herself.
"Lindsay, sorry, but tonight you will board the Boat of Losers," Chris said, sounding disappointed that the prettiest girl on the island was leaving.
"Bye, Lindsay!" someone in the trees and Beth cried out at the same time.
"Tyler!" Lindsay cried.
Everyone stared in mixed astonishment and disgust, astonishment because someone from a different team was at the campfire, and disgust that they both ran up to each other and started to kiss.
"Enough, enough!" Chris shouted. "The Dock of Shame awaits, Lindsay!"
"Sorry, Tyler, I have to go," she said, pecking him on the cheek and getting onto the boat.
As the boat sped out of sight, Chris turned back to the Screaming Gophers (and Tyler). "Okay, guys, I have nothing else for you. Go back to your cabins, your next challenge starts bright and early tomorrow."
How'd you like? It's pretty long and most of the chapters will be this way with the punctuation and capitalization all (hopefully) acceptable. Each chapter will be an episode so they will all be over the few- thousand-word mark. Also, no one will be OOC in any way; I'm trying to avoid that since none of the characters are like that. I'm trying to put all the couples in equally, but maybe a bit more of Courtney/Duncan because they're just really cute together. You might notice that there are some parts that I copied from the real shows in my future chapters (like Courtney falling asleep on top of Duncan and some of the quotes), but no copyright infringement intended. There will be a little author's not from me after every chapter like this one, sorry if you're bored, but you can skip my boring thoughts if you want…
NO PROMISES FOR UPDATING. I WILL UPDATE WHEN I'M INSPIRED OR BORED.
ALSO, I'M NOT AFRAID OF FLAMES. BUT IF THERE ARE NO FLAMES IT WOULD BE APPRECIATED BECAUSE IT MAKES ME ALL HAPPY INSIDE…