Disclaimer:I own nothing...if i did...why the hell would I be writing fanfiction.

A/N: No flames or for that matter critisism. I write how I write and I don't need people telling me why they don't like it personall. If she's a mary-sue so what? At least she's better than most of them. Plus, it's Buffy/Angel-who isn't a mary-sue

She couldn't help but wonder, as her blood pooled on the ground, where her life had gone. Why she was here? How far love had really gotten her. The world was white around the edges and mud caked her body and face. Her skirt, ripped and bloody, spread around her. She could smell it, smell the blood, feel it leave her body. She was slipping, closer and closer to death.

I wonder what it feels like.Death, she thought.

She couldn't help but smile at the thought. The world was moving in and out of focus, like a video camera. Noise was fading, cars no longer invaded this play, screams no longer broke through the barrier, killing her inside.

She pictured him, pictured his soft, puppy dog eyes, his perfectly sculpted body, the way his lips curved when he smiled at her, the way his hair felt under her hands. She remembered him. As he was now, not then, not when he killed all those people. She couldn't help but smile.

Then the ground was gone, cold invaded her body.

So, this is death. Bring it on, Reaper. Show me my life, she thought.

But, her life didn't flash before her eyes. All of it. Random moments from her childhood. But, then it stopped. Stopped on that night. Death was going to make her watch it. Make her watch him. Make her realize all she was giving up by not fighting.

She stared at the walls, coated in newspaper, a wallpaper if you like. The static on her T.V. crackled, speaking to her in some unknown language only she seemed to understand. Her hands were clamped tight over her ears, eyes squeezed shut as tight as possible.

"SHUT UP!!" She screamed, trying so hard not to open her eyes,"I tried! But, I couldn't! I didn't want this! LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!"

And they stopped. Just like they always did after she screamed bloody murder. The screams stopped suddenly and their faces dissappeared.

Willow did her nightly check, checking in on the girl. Tears streamed down Dani's face.

What did he do to you?, Willow thought.

Willow closed the door. She took a deep breath and walked down the hall.

"How's she doing?" Buffy asked, concern written all over her face.

"I don't know. I think she knows how to make them stop. But, there's no way to tell if they ever actually do," Willow admitted.

"Angelus did this to her?" Xander asked, looking around. His eye showing his emotions. Anger, hate, helplessness.

"Angelus, did a lot of things. But, normally his victims never came out alive. I wonder why she's still around," Giles mused, looking through a musty book, pages yellowed with age.

"I'm worried about her Giles. She's getting stronger. She could hurt us. Worse she could hurt herself," Buffy stared at everyone,"We need to find a way to help her."

She dropped her hands. The screams had left. For now. She crawled to the T.V. switching it off. Sounds from downstairs were smothered. She climbed to her feet, and paced. Her dark hair hiding her face in some places. Her black make up had long since streamed down her face. She could finally taste the salt in her mouth.

"I can't do this," she breathed,"I have to find him. To show him what he's done to me."

She slipped on her boots, loose with black and white checkered laces. Spike had given them to her as a birthday gift. Her honorary big brother. She pulled one of his dusters from the closet and slid it on. Breathing in the scent of it, like ash and Fructis hair gel. The smell calmed her, reminded her that someone knew her. The real her.

She grabbed her duffel bag, shoving as much clothing into it as possible. Her make up soon joined that.

Once I get to L.A. I can find Spike and we can get me more clothes, she thought.

She grabbed her tiara, sliding it carefully into the duffel bag. A dagger soon sat next to it. She opened her door and peeked her head out.

No one...yet, crossed her mind.

She closed her door and walked the short distance to her window. She kicked the window shattering the glass. Pounding footsteps drew her attention.

"Now or never"

And then she jumped.