In the shadow of the Womping Willow

Disclaimers: HP isn't mine, no profit is made, it's just for fun.
Notes: great thanks to Taran who betaed this.

James looked on as the Headmaster led a very messed-up and trembling Severus Snape to his office, and felt more frightened with every passing second. Snape hadn't spoken one word to him since the Whomping Willow, hadn't even look at him. James could feel every single tie of the almost-friendship between them that he so carefully established during the last 2 years slowly dissolve into nothingness.
"Severus! Sev, please, I can explain, Sev..."
The dark haired boy lifted his head and looked at him. In his eyes, there was a firestorm of pure hate.
"Traitor..." whispered Snape, passing James by.
The next moment he disappeared behind the gargoyle. James was left staring at the gray stone.

"...and so James pulled me out," once again that flash of anger. You look at me- angry, bitter, asking for the blood of your enemies. Some would compare you to a crow, there're times I would too, but not now. Now you're a black panther- furious, deadly, and ready to kill.
My God, child, do you ever forgive a single mistake?
You could be friends with James, and I'm sure he wanted it. During the last 2 years I saw him approach you as carefully as a medic would approach a wounded wild beast. I saw him slowly gain your trust, so slowly. And now all is lost, because of Sirius Black's foolishness. I'm sure you will never trust James again. And there are some in your house, who will be ecstatic about this, ready to lure you with the promises of trust to the darkest of the Dark Arts...
Oh child, what will I do now?
Will I give you the prey you're longing for?

"Well, Mr. Snape," sighed Dumbledore." Thank you very much for your account of the facts. I advise you to go to the Hospital Wing now, all those scratches need looking to."
"Headmaster," the boy hesitated, then shuddered and plunged on. "What will you do to ...them?"
Dumbledore stared at his clasped hands. In this moment he looked every one of his one hundred years.
"I'm afraid I have to expel Mr. Black. Mr. Lupin and especially Mr. Potter have nothing to..."
"WHAT?" Snape seemed to be completely astonished.
"Well, Mr. Potter had..."
"No, not him. You're expelling Black? A Gryffindor? Your favorite?"
"I have no favorites, Mr. Snape," the Headmaster said sternly.
He was slightly surprised: didn't Snape want it just a second ago?

Right now the boy is no longer angry, or bitter.
He's surprised, very surprised and ...afraid?
But there's not a single bit of happiness or revenge in these black bottomless eyes.
No joy over the fallen enemy.
No fire of hate.
How strange, how very strange...

"And Mr. Black made an attempt of murder. On 'your' person," the Headmaster continued.

You should be glad of a justice done. You should be glad.
You, the wild beast who hated this rich, spoiled kid with so great passion over these six years. Why do you seem afraid?
Why are you looking at me with pleading eyes while speaking of Gryffindor, of favorites, you, who hate this favoritism with all your heart?

"Must I remind you that?" the Headmaster said.
"Black is as stupid as a brick. Murdering is not in him. James said it was a prank..."

What are you trying to say?

"Leading someone to a werewolf's lair is not a prank."
"He surely thought I was advanced enough in the Dark Arts to handle a werewolf."

You're trying to protect your worst enemy. Why?

The Headmaster raised an eyebrow. "And is it so?"
Snape's face became completely emotionless.
"Perhaps," he said slowly, looking intently at Dumbledore.
"I'm very keen in the Dark Arts."

He had said something important.
Very important.
He is very good at the Dark Arts, that's true.
Sirius might have really thought he'd be able to handle a werewolf.
And so, Sirius had come up with this prank.
Severus is very curious, and Sirius might have thought it would be easy to use this curiosity over where Remus went every month to make him go...
I'm very keen in the Dark Arts.
And also so cautious, so intelligent, so observant...
Oh My God.

Snape saw the shocking realization on the Headmaster's face, and smiled.
"Yes," he said.
"You knew that Remus was..." choked Dumbledore.
"Yes."
"This prank..."
"My doing. Sirius is too easy to manipulate."
"But why?"
"Because James came too close. And I had no reason to repulse him. Now I have one."

Again this small smile.
He is very different now.
Gone is a wild beast, gone is a crow- were they ever real?
He is a snake- invisible, poisonous, cold-blooded.
He is so calm- it's frightening.
Calm, composed, cold - and surely not aged only sixteen years.
He can't be sixteen; he is my age at least.
Where did I saw this face, this look before?

"Why?"
"I can't afford being close, being friends with Gryffindors, Headmaster. Not if I want to became a Death Eater..."
"What?!"
"...and rise to the Inner Circle. Do you know, that HE takes only ones of my age as his closest servants?"
"No, " murmured the Headmaster, "I didn't know that."

How could I forget? He has Tom's eyes. The same look of extreme ambition.

"I know you don't have spies there." That was not a question.
"I don't. What I would like to know is how do you know that."
"It's irrelevant," shuddered Snape. "The good question is: do you want one?"

What?

"What do you mean?"
Snape laughed. A strange, humorless chuckle. "Don't you understand,
Headmaster? I mean me. When I rise to the Inner Circle, and I will, would
you like me to spy for you?"
"Are you serious?"
"I didn't plan to propose it to you so soon, but perhaps it's for the
best...I've been preparing for it since my second year, Headmaster. Of
course, I'm serious. My parents are followers of Voldemort- I'm sure you
know about that..."
"Yes," Dumbledore replied weakly, "I do."
"So I can't be an Auror. But I still want to fight him- and if I can't do it in an honest battle, then I'll work behind his back. Anyway, that's what I'm best at."
"But why are you so determined, why...?"
"He made my parents into monsters- and you think I'll just sit down and do nothing?"
"No, of course, I understand... But you must understand that the job of a spy is very..."
"…dangerous. Yes, I know."
"No fame, Severus. No recognition, no glory, no Order of Merlin First Class."
Snape smirked. "Slytherin's ambition works in strange ways, Headmaster. I'll help kill Voldemort. For me, that's enough."
"No friends. No one to trust you."
"No different from now."
"That's not true. James Potter wants to be your friend."
"James..."

He smiles at little, and suddenly I see a boy.
Just a boy, sixteen years old, smiling at some moment in the past, unknown to me. Some happy moment of understanding, friendship and warmness. Something his heart is bleeding to have.

"Stupid Gryffindors..." he murmurs.
"What?"
"Stupid, trusting, carefree, unaware, free Gryffindors." He looks at me, his eyes are sad. "They have no idea of the danger. I'll do it, Headmaster. You must have your spy, and there's no one else."
"You may hate them all one day. Just for being happy and carefree while you couldn't."
"Perhaps," he says and I see that he has thought about it.
Is there something he didn't think about?
"But even then I'll work for you anyway. Will you have me?"

My God, help me.
This is a golden opportunity, the one we have waited for so long.
How can I refuse?
But I'm tempted to - just to save him, to protect this not-so-child, this so-perfect-Slytherin from the darkness he knows so well.

"Yes, I will. Thank you, Severus. Thank you so much."
"Thank you," he nods, and then looks at me with mischievous eyes. "You must be unfair in this matter, Headmaster. I need an excuse to show my distrust in you."
"I'll not expel Sirius Black. And I'll give James Potter...thirty points. For bravery. Is it enough?"

He is laughing now. "Oh, yes, it's perfect!" and then a second later the laughter is gone, completely gone from his face and eyes, and he is serious again.

"When my contacts approach me, I'll tell you. I'm sure it will be soon."
"Very well. You must be going."

"Yes. Hospital Wing," he stands up, and we shake hands. Something that feels completely natural. I wonder if I'll ever view him as a student again. Most probably not.
"Good luck, Severus."

He smiles, nods, and a second later he is gone.

... He was made a Death Eater that very summer.