I'm not going to even try to excuse my horrible timing with updates. I've been working on a follow-up to Nathan Scott's to Blame and its more than half way done, so yay! And I've been working on a steamy one-shot that I've had started since last summer so be on the look out for those soon. Anyways, here's the next chapter and its pretty angsty, but very important to the story. Make sure to let me know what you think.

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

Haley sighed as she listened to the light rain outside her apartment. It had been raining for days in Tree Hill and Haley had to admit that she was grateful for it. The weather matched her mood and people usually didn't go out in the rain, which meant that none of her friends had come to her door begging her to open up about her issues. It had been three days since that night at Tric and she had yet to speak to anyone. People had called and sent text messages, but Haley refused to listen to the sympathy and their need to baby her. That night was her breaking point with not only Nathan and herself, but with everyone else. She was tired of hiding what had happened and the only reason she did hide it was because she knew what her friends' reaction would be. They always thought that she couldn't handle certain things and that she was always in a fragile state, but she could handle a lot more than they knew. They finally found that out when she decided to share with everyone what she had gone through with Nathan. She didn't regret letting the truth come out and it was a much needed relief for her to not have to carry that around, but she just didn't want to deal with the consequences. Perhaps her coming home was a mistake. Maybe her friends were right in treating her like a china doll. She was naïve about her relationship with Nathan and she was naïve about the situation she had gotten herself into.

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

Haley sighed again at the steady drizzle of the rain and swatted at the tears that began to pour from her eyes. She'd been locked in her apartment for three days and she had yet to cry about what happened…until now. She had thought about everything, forwards and backwards, and she wasn't any closer to understanding it than she was before. Nathan had admitted that he had feelings for her. Her sixteen year old self would have been jumping for joy at the news, but Haley was older and much wiser now. Nathan had hurt her and he felt guilty. That was it. He wasn't use to losing things and he wasn't use to messing up and this was how he was hoping to get her back. She had told him that he had taken advantage of her feelings, intentionally or not, she didn't know, but he did. He used her because he was afraid to be alone and she, in return, did the same because she was afraid of losing him. Fast forward to the present and here she was analyzing every aspect of her life and wondering if she'll ever fully trust Nathan again or get back to the girl she longed to be.

Knock. Knock.

Haley jerked her head away from her window and looked towards the door. She shut her eyes and hoped that what she heard was just in her head. The last thing she wanted to do was talk and whine about all the shit that went down. She went back to staring out the window when the knocks sounded again.

"Haley! Haley its Brooke! Can you please open the door? I'm worried about you."

Haley blinked back her tears and took a deep breath. Hearing Brooke's voice made her realize this wasn't a dream. She had been able to be in her own little world for three days and now reality was knocking at her door.

"Haley if you don't open this door I'll use the spare key you made me!"

Haley reluctantly made her way to the front door and looked through the peep hole. The very last thing she needed was a surprise ambush from either one of the Scott brothers. She pushed a few strands from her messy bun out of her face and prepared herself for the onslaught of questions and worries.

"Oh thank god you opened the door because I actually forgot my spare key."

By the time Brooke had finished her sentence, Haley was already back on the couch staring out her window again. Brooke had hoped that she would find Haley in better spirits today. Everyone had decided to give her some much needed space, but they were also starting to worry from her lack of communication with them. Brooke's worries were made reality when she saw just how heartbroken Haley looked. She walked into the dimly lit apartment and sat at the other end of the couch. She took a moment to study her friend and she could see the unshed tears in her eyes and the exhaustion laced in them. Her hair was in a messy bun and she wore no make-up, just a black V-neck sweater and grey sweat pants.

Brooke and Lucas had talked for many hours that night after Tric and they realized how selfish they had been. Haley had needed their help two years ago. She had never openly asked for it, but they knew their friend and knew that something was wrong, yet they never pushed it. They both felt horrible for not being there when she needed someone the most and Brooke vowed that she would try to help Haley as much as she would let her. Her vow was going to start today.

"Hales…talk to me."

"About what Brooke?"

"About anything and everything…whatever you want."

Haley was silent for awhile before she asked a question she had been wanting to know the answer to for three days.

"How's Lucas?"

"Worried about you. He's not mad if that's what you're wondering. I mean, he was at first, but now he's just worried. We all are."

"Well I'm not going to lie and say that I'm fine because I'm not, but I'm not as bad as you guys may think."

"Well that's good to know."

They both sat in silence for a little while longer just listening to the sprinkling rain outside. The rain had a calming effect over Haley and if it hadn't been like that these past few days she probably would have gone crazy.

"Have you talked to anyone?"

"No. I just haven't felt like dealing with anything."

"I don't blame you. These few days have been crazy. Lucas hasn't even spoken to Nathan since then."

"Why?"

"He's still pissed at him for what he did to you Haley. We all are. We had no idea that it was that bad between the two of you."

"I know and I wanted it to keep it that way because this is exactly what I didn't want. This is what I was trying to avoid. Everyone's lives are getting turned upside down."

"Haley what happened was out of your control. It's all on Nathan. I just wish you would have come to me."

"I was embarrassed. I wasn't ready to deal with what happened and I'm still not, but I guess Nathan was right about one thing."

"What's that?"

"That I need to stop running from this."

Haley sighed and let herself catch up with the longest conversation she's had in days. It was weird to be talking about what she had spent so much of her time analyzing, but she knew she owed it to herself and Brooke to let someone in.

"Look Haley…I'm not taking sides or anything, but maybe you should talk to Nathan."

"He's been calling, but I haven't answered."

"He admitted he was in love with you…that has to mean something, right?"

Brooke watched Haley cautiously as she treaded into dangerous territory. Haley was sensitive right now and she didn't want to push her away by asking too many questions.

Haley looked at Brooke and could see her second-guessing her question. Haley had been asking herself the same thing and she always came up with the same answer.

"No Brooke. He feels guilty. That's what it is."

"You honestly think that?"

"I don't know what to think anymore."

Nathan stared longingly at the bottle of vodka on the kitchen counter. The bottle had been sitting there for the past three days and so had Nathan. The temptation to fill that burn down his throat was strong. It was the strongest it had been since he stopped drinking heavily two years ago, when Haley left. That night at Tric had nearly pushed him to drown himself in that bottle all over again, but something stopped him every time. It was a four and a half year old blonde haired, blue eyed boy. His son. The reason he had straightened up and turned his life around…the reason he was still doing that.

Jamie was still at pre-school and Deb would pick him up after. Deb had been looking after Jamie every day since Nathan explained to Deb what happened with Haley…everything. She was stunned to hear about his behavior. She, like everyone else, had no idea that Nathan was so traumatized by Dan's death. He was so grateful for his mother's help through all of this. She had worked through her own problems to help be there for her grandson because she wasn't there for Nathan all those years ago. Deb helped him work through the issues he had with Dan and with himself, but he didn't know if she could help with the mess he created with Haley. He had royally fucked up at Tric. He had pushed Haley too far and she finally pushed back and reminded him of the huge jackass he was to her. What was he thinking? Haley was one of the most stubborn people he knew and he was dumb enough to think that he could get her to forgive him. After this she would probably never talk to him again, much like his friends. He hadn't spoken to anyone since that night and Lucas made it perfectly clear that he wasn't worth the dirt on the bottom of his shoe. He deserved it though…he deserved all of it.

"You look like ass."

Nathan turned towards the front entryway and saw his brother standing there with his arms crossed. He still didn't look happy with him. In fact, he looked just as pissed off as when he decked him in the jaw at Tric.

"What the hell are you doing here? You going to finish what you started at Tric?"

Lucas eyed his brother cautiously. Nathan really did look like shit. His eyes were heavy and tired, his face was starting to show the outline of a beard, and his hair was all over the place, probably from him running his hands through it.

"As much as I would love to beat your ass…that's not why I'm here. I just came to see how you were doing. No one's heard from you and I just wanted to make sure you were still alive and apparently you're alive, but you look like death."

"I don't have time for your stupid ass jokes Pucas."

"Really? Because it didn't really look like you were up to much before I got here."

"Well then do you mind getting the fuck out so I can get back to what I was doing?"

"What? Pouting? Brooding?"

Nathan sighed angrily. This was not what he needed right now. He actually was pouting and brooding, but Lucas didn't need to know that. He knew he fucked up and he didn't need anybody else rubbing the salt in his wounds.

"What do you want Luke?"

"I didn't come here to argue with you Nathan. We need to talk about what happened. I think I deserve some sort of explanation for what Haley said at Tric."

Nathan wanted to tell Lucas to "fuck off", but he knew that they did need to talk. He had been running through everything in his head for days and he'd been thinking of how he could explain himself, but he knew nothing could save him from the shit he did to Haley. There was no coming back from that.

Nathan made his way towards the living room and plopped down on the couch. He could hear Lucas following him and sit in the arm chair across the room.

"What do you want to know?"

"Everything. Everything you and Haley didn't tell me two years ago."

"Well she pretty much covered all the bases there at Tric."

"What happened to you Nathan? When I left for New York you guys were inseparable and the next thing I know she's moved across country to get away from your ass. Now I find out you kicked her out of the house in the middle of the night."

There they were. His shortcomings. They were always coming back to slap him in the face.

"Luke I don't really know what to say. I don't even know what happened. One minute I would be fine and the other minute I was pissed off at the world."

"It was Dan wasn't it?"

"Yeah…when Dan called us and said he had HCM and all that shit about him dying, I felt bad. We talked about our issues and he told me how proud he was of me. I let him spend time with Jamie and get to know him. It was good for awhile, but then I get a call that he died. I didn't know what to think. I was devastated that he was gone and yet I was still mad as hell at him for being such a dick all those years. I thought I had let a lot of that shit go, but apparently not. I never really got the chance to tell him how I truly felt. The minute he said he was sick I turned into a little bitch and lost my backbone with him. I was angry at myself and being mad at everyone else was easier to deal with than looking in the mirror."

Lucas took a deep breath as his brother laid it all out there. He had never known that Nathan felt this way. Nathan always had this wall up when it came to his emotions and to see him broken like this was an eye opener.

"Why didn't you talk to me Nathan? Or to anyone? Why hold it all in?"

"I don't know…that's me being stubborn and an asshole. I guess part of it was basketball and the NBA. That life was getting the best of me. I thought I was invincible and I wanted to act like it too. I had been weak with Dan and I didn't want to be that way again."

"Damn Nate…"

"Look I know this is fucked up and I know I need to face what I did, especially with Haley and I'm going to try, but I can't take it back. I wish I could because I not only fucked up with her, but with Jamie too. He may not remember, but I was a horrible dad during that time and Haley was right to call me out about acting like Dan. I'll forever be making that up to him."

There was a long silence that filled the air as both Scott men took in the weight of the situation. Lucas didn't realize how bad things were between Nathan and Haley. That's what he and Brooke had been talking about since that night at Tric. They had both been feeling incredibly guilty for being so self-absorbed and not being there for their friends. They had both decided to try and help mend their friends and get them back to the people they use to be.

"Have you talked to Haley?"

"I've called her every day, but she doesn't answer. I've thought about going over there, but I was afraid that might overwhelm her. Have you?"

"No…Brooke's over there right now though. No one's talked to her for days. We wanted to give her space, but Brooke was really worried about her."

"What am I going to do Luke? How am I going to fix this?"

Lucas could see the desperation in Nathan's eyes and he wished that he could help him, but he knew Haley was hurt and it wouldn't be easy.

"Look man…I don't know what to tell you. What you did to her Nathan was low and not only her, but Jamie too. This is almost unfixable."

Nathan sighed. That hurt, but Nathan knew that his brother was right. He knew he fucked up and now everyone else did too. Maybe there was no fixing this? Maybe it was past that point? He had to start preparing himself for the fact that he and Haley may never recover from this.

Clay pulled up to the spot that Lucas said Nathan might be and could see his figure in the distance on the court. Clay hadn't seen Nathan since that night at Tric and he figured he should go and check on his client. He was just as pissed as everyone else at Nathan after what Haley had revealed to them. It shook him to the core to see his best friend so broken. He was the one that she had leaned on and cried to that night and he nearly became ill after seeing her like that. Haley was an amazing woman. Clay practically worshipped the ground she walked on and he could see that the Scott brothers felt the same way. He had stayed away from Nathan for awhile so that he could be calm and professional with him. No matter what was to happen, Nathan was still his client and he had to honor that contract. He could see that Nathan was broken as well and Clay did feel bad for him. Clay knew all about being a lost man. He had gone through a really dark period when his wife died and he still struggled, but Haley had come into his life at the exact moment he needed her. He would forever be thankful to her and he would continue to be there for her. It was easy to be mad at the faceless man that she had talked to him about in California. The man that broke her heart and treated her like shit was an asshole and Clay vowed to kick his ass one day, but now he could see the man's face and the feelings he held in. A strong sense of déjà vu over swept Clay. He was that guy two years ago and a young woman had saved him. He was going to make that same prediction today. Haley would save Nathan and Nathan would save her. Clay could see the love they held for each other, but they had to work that shit out for themselves. For now, he was here to conduct business.

"If this is the player I have to pitch to the Bobcats, then I'm in deep shit."

Nathan turned and held the ball in his hands as Clay walked up to the Rivercourt. Just what he needed. The universe fucking hates him.

"A little off your game?"

"Maybe…I've had a lot of shit going on, but you knew that right?"

Clay could hear Nathan's voice tense and his words were short when he spoke. He figured he would be pissed at him. Clay understood that Nathan probably felt that he was taking his place as Haley's best friend, but that's not what Clay was playing at. He genuinely cared and loved this girl and he knew Nathan did too, but Nathan was threatened by him.

"Hey man I just came to check on you. We do work together now so how you're doing is important to me."

"Did they teach you to kiss ass like that at the agency or did you learn that all on your own?"

"Little bit of both, but I'm not kissing your ass. I'm honoring our working contract. If you want to talk about Haley then that can be off the record, but I'm here to talk business."

Nathan sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He walked over to the bleachers and took a drink out of his water bottle.

"I'm sorry. I just have a lot of shit I've been dealing with and the whole NBA thing has been in the back of my mind."

"I understand, but you've got to stay focused. The stuff in your personal life will always be there and you just have to learn to tune that stuff out."

"That easy huh?"

"No its not, but it'll come to you. Anyway I was looking for you for a reason. You're former head coach called and wants to set up an appointment with you. They want a sort of tryout type set up. You have this in the bag, but the appointment's just a formal type thing they have to do. After you sign on with them again, then we can talk numbers."

"Wow…uh…that's great."

"You don't sound very excited."

"I just didn't expect it so quickly, but I am excited. Thanks man."

Nathan held out his hand for Clay and they shook hands.

"I don't want you to worry Nathan. Things will work out."

"Are we still talking on the record or off?"

It was Clay's turn to sigh and move to sit on the bleachers.

"Both I guess."

"Have you seen her Clay?"

"No I haven't. I talked to her the day after everything went down, but not since then. I called Luke looking for you this morning and he did tell me that Brooke saw her."

"How is she?"

"Brooke told him she wasn't doing so well. She's upset still and hurt. I'm just trying to give her some space."

"I've been wanting to go see her, but I know it wouldn't do any good."

"I know you've probably heard this a million times already, but the key is time. You know Haley and how stubborn she is. She has to come around in her own time."

"Can you do me a favor man?"

"Sure."

"If you see Haley or talk to her can you just let her know that…I…that I'm sorry I guess. I know that's not much."

"Don't worry man. I'll pass the message along. You just focus on you."

With that, Clay stood up, patted Nathan's back, and walked towards his car. Nathan watched him go and twirled the basketball in his hands. Clay gave him a lot to think about professionally and personally. After he talked with Lucas this morning Nathan decided to go to the Rivercourt and relieve some stress. His plan didn't work. This place held so many memories for him and Haley. The voices in his head only got louder when he came out here. He couldn't escape the past or the present, but he had to change the future, for him and his son.

Clay walked up the steps to the apartment building and down the corridor. He was definitely making the rounds today. He found the apartment number he was looking for and knocked lightly; silently praying she would come to the door. He was shocked when after only a few seconds Haley appeared in the door way.

"Hey Hales."

"Hi."

Haley immediately leaped into his arms and held on for dear life. Clay was caught off guard by her welcoming attitude, but he knew that wasn't a completely good sign. He could feel his shirt start to become wet with her tears and he had to fight to keep his own at bay.

Haley surprised herself by clinging to Clay like she did, but she had missed him and she could really use his comforting right now. Brooke had only stayed for an hour that morning and they didn't talk much. Haley just didn't feel like having one of those "girl talks", but having Clay here made her more vulnerable for some reason. She supposed it was because he had helped her through so much. Everyone else had always seen her as a "fragile" thing and she didn't want to play into that anymore, but Clay understood. He's dealt with his fair share of demons too.

"Come on Hales…let's go inside."

Clay led her inside and shut the door behind him. He took in the sight of her apartment. There was nothing shocking about the state of her place, but it didn't look like it had been touched in days, which meant she probably hadn't eaten very much. It looked too clean to him and that worried him.

Clay went to the kitchen and opened the fridge. She had a ton of food, but it all lay untouched. He took off his jacket and decided he would make her a bowl of macaroni n' cheese. As he moved around in the kitchen, he couldn't help but think about Nathan and the things he said. He wanted to help Nathan, but he also wanted to beat his ass for what he did to Haley. This situation was clearly fucked up.

Haley watched from the couch as Clay moved around the kitchen. She smiled to herself when she saw him grab the box of macaroni n' cheese. Clay did not cook when she first met him, but he had quickly learned to make her favorite food for when she wasn't feeling well. Her mom used to make her mac n' cheese all the time and especially when she was sick. For some reason mac n' cheese was her sick remedy instead of soup. She waited for him to bring up the whole Nathan situation, but he never did. He worked in silence as he boiled the pasta and then mixed all the ingredients together. She was grateful that he wasn't pushing her, but she also didn't want to be the one to ask questions. She knew he had probably spoken to Nathan since Tric and even though she was mad at Nathan, she was still curious about how he was doing. She watched Clay pour the food into a bowl with a spoon and then bring it to her in the living room.

"Thanks Clay."

"No problem."

Clay sat next to Haley and watched as she ate the pasta. He wanted to talk to her about Nathan, but he held back and decided to let her lead the conversation. He didn't want to push her. He looked over at her and saw that she had nearly eaten the whole bowl. He watched as she sat the bowl on the coffee table and patted her stomach.

"I'm stuffed. Thanks again Clay."

Clay reached over and tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear.

"You don't have to thank me. You've made me more meals than I can count, so this is the least I can do."

Haley smiled at his comment. He was right about that. She had made him a ton of home cooked meals since he lived like such a bachelor. She remembered looking into his fridge one time and seeing nothing but butter, carrots, beer, and old take out. The memory made her miss California and the life she had there. It was so carefree and easy there, unlike the situation here in Tree Hill. Her mind travelled back to the situation at hand and sighed. Clay still wasn't making any move to talk about what happened, so she decided she would suck it up and ask.

"So have you talked to Nathan?"

Clay almost didn't hear her question. Her voice was so small and shaky. He watched her play with the hem of her shirt and bite her lip in nervousness. He really didn't want to have this conversation. Seeing Haley in pain like this only made him upset.

"Uh…yeah. Today actually."

"And how was he?"

"Not good Hales."

Haley looked at Clay and willed her tears not to fall. She wished she didn't care. She wished she could be happy about what Clay said. She wished she could dismiss all of her feelings, but she couldn't do any of those things.

"What did he say?"

"Hales I don't think we should be tal-"

"Tell me Clay…I want to know."

Clay sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He knew that anything he said would just upset her.

"Well he looked like shit and felt even worse."

"What did he say?"

"Hales…look I know you want to sort through this stuff and that's fine, but I can't be put in the middle and I don't want to hurt you."

"Clay I want to know what he said. I have a right to know."

"You should talk to him yourself. He's really broken up about everything."

Haley shook her head vigorously at Clay's suggestion.

"I can't do that."

"That's the only way you guys can sort through this mess Haley. I know you're hurting and I hate that for you, but you can't avoid Nathan or this situation forever."

"I thought you were on my side Clay?"

"I am Hales, but you can't keep living like this. You used to be so vivacious and full of life and now you're…different. I miss the old Haley."

Haley felt her tears fall as Clay cupped her cheek. She could see the concern in his eyes and it upset her that she had brought him into this mess. She knew he was right. The Haley that Clay knew was much different than the girl in front of him. The girl he knew was the one she thought she had lost living with Nathan. The one that she thought Nathan had robbed her of.

"This is how I am when it comes to Nathan. He always makes me feel like I'm back in high school. Like he's the hot shot and I'm the tutor or he's the NBA player and I'm just the help."

It broke Clay's heart to hear Haley talk about herself like that. She was such an amazing woman and it pissed him off that she couldn't see that.

"Haley…look at me."

Haley reluctantly pulled her eyes up to meet Clay's. He reached for her hand and kept his other hand on her cheek.

"You are an amazing person and you are not second to anybody. I know you think Nathan feels that way, but I can tell you that he does not feel that way about you. He doesn't look at you as "the help". I've seen the way he looks at you and he is madly in love with you and you know that. So why are you hiding from it Hales? Why are you denying a chance at happiness?"

"Because I'm afraid."

Haley pulled her cardigan sweater around her body as she stood outside. It was late, very late and she shouldn't be here, but she knew she would lose her nerve if she waited until the morning. She didn't even know what she wanted to say, but she knew something had to be done. Her talk with Clay had made her realize that she needed to get back in control of the situation.

She could see a light on in the house and knew that he was probably awake. She lightly knocked on the door and waited.

Nathan had been watching an old NBA game when he heard a knock on the front door. He looked at the clock and saw that it was nearly midnight. Who the hell was at his house? He figured it was probably Luke coming to check on him again. He got up from the couch and made his way towards the front door.

"Lucas if you make another joke about how bad I look or smell then I'm beating your fucking ass."

Nathan reached for the handle and swung open the door, but Lucas wasn't on the other side. Nathan stared at the girl that had consumed his thoughts for three days. He did not expect to see her here and he hoped everything was okay because she didn't look like she was alright.

"Haley…are you okay? Is something wrong? Are you hurt?"

Nathan visually searched her body for any injuries, but didn't see anything. Her eyes were red and swollen and her lips were red and nearly raw, no doubt from her biting them. She still looked beautiful to him.

"Um…I just came to talk. Did I disturb you?"

"No, no…come inside."

Haley walked in and wrapped her arms around herself. Clay was right. Nathan looked tired and stressed. His facial hair was growing out and his eyes looked bloodshot, but she couldn't deny the quickening of her heart whenever he was around.

"Do you want a drink or something?"

"No I'm okay. Is Jamie here?"

"No he's been at my Mom's for a couple of days. I didn't want him to see me like this."

Haley nodded and was grateful he wasn't around either. Jamie didn't need to be exposed to their stupid problems.

"Okay well let's go to the living room."

Haley followed Nathan to the living room and sat down in the arm chair opposite the couch.

"Look Haley I-"

"No Nathan…me first. I need to say this."

Nathan nodded his head and watched as she fidgeted with the buttons on her sweater.

"I know you're sorry. I know you feel bad. I do too. I need to apologize for the way I acted at Tric. I was rude and belligerent and that's not the way that should have happened. I'm sorry. But these apologies are not going to fix us or what happened. You and I are so different from the people we used to be. I miss the people we used to be. I miss the times we had together. I miss the Nathan I fell in love with."

Nathan's head shot up at what Haley just said. She admitted she was in love with him, but not the man sitting in front of her. She was in love with someone else. A Nathan from another time.

"We've both had life changing events take place and we're not the same people from high school and that's okay, but we lost each other. You lost sight of me and if I'm going to be completely honest tonight then I need to tell you that I've been in love with you since we were kids. I've never stopped being in love with you either. No matter what happened with us, I still held the same love for you. You've hurt me a lot over the years Nathan…more than anyone, but you've also brought me the most joy, along with your son. I don't regret my decision to stay in Tree Hill and help you with Jamie. I wanted to be here with you, but you and I didn't want the same things at the time. I wanted a family. I wanted you."

Haley could feel her throat tighten and the tears blur her vision as she continued to release the weight of years of suppressed feelings.

"I miss you so much. I have wanted nothing more than to forgive all that's happened and just be with you, but I can't. Too much has happened. We both need to work on ourselves before we start trying to be together. We're a mess. "

Haley wiped her eyes and released the breath she had been holding since she got here. She studied Nathan's face and could see that he was in deep thought.

Nathan nodded in understanding at what Haley said. She was right…about everything. He was shocked by her admission of being in love with him for so long. He had no idea her feelings went that far back. If only he hadn't been so blind.

"I want you to know something Hales and you need to believe me when I say this because it's the truth. I've been in love with you since we were in high school. I was foolish and didn't realize it myself, much less realize that you might feel the same way. You have always been too good for me. I know I've let you down on more than one occasion and I will forever be making those things up to you, but this is not guilt talking. I am in love with you because I fell in love with you, not because I feel bad. My feelings are genuine and I know I have to rebuild your trust and that's okay. I'm willing to do whatever it takes because I let you go once and I refuse to do it again. I had something good and so did Jamie. We were a family and I want that back and I'll wait forever if I have to."

It was Nathan's turn to release the breath he'd been holding. It felt good to finally say everything he needed to say. He knew it wouldn't fix things, but Haley needed to know how he felt.

Haley didn't know where they could go from here. She wanted to start over, but it would have to be slow. She knew she wanted to be with him, but they both had a lot they needed to work on before that happened.

"I want to start over Nathan. We put the past behind us. I think we both owe ourselves that much. We need to go slow and we start as friends and then we'll see where it goes from there."

"Okay…whatever you want Hales."

They both sat in silence a moment longer before Haley decided it was probably time for her to go. They both had a lot to think about tonight.

"I should go. Thanks for talking with me tonight."

Nathan stood along with Haley and walked towards the front door.

"I'm glad you came by and I'm glad we did this."

They both stood at the front entrance, wondering how to end an evening like this one. Nathan knew they needed to take things slow so he opted to just open the door for her and leave the touching to a minimum. He let his hand fall to her lower back as she went through the door and outside, but he didn't actually make contact. He didn't want to scare her away.

"Thanks again Nathan. I guess I'll see you later."

"Yeah…and thanks to you too, for giving me another chance."

"It's a chance for both of us. I'll see you around."

Nathan watched as she climbed into her range rover and pulled out of the driveway. God he loved that girl. She was on her way to forgiving him and he need to do the same. He needed to start forgiving himself, for everything.

Haley looked out at the water and sighed. The sun was going to come up soon. After she left Nathan's she had stopped at the table by the docks that her and Nathan spent many afternoons at when they were kids. The table brought back good memories and she smiled as she traced the outline of their initials carved into the wood. They had decided to leave the past in the past and start over and to do that Haley had to let those memories go. It wasn't fair to keep comparing themselves to people they used to be. She would still cherish their memories, but she wouldn't dwell on them anymore. They had a clean slate. She had to start forgiving herself and forgiving Nathan. That was the only way they could move forward to being anything.