A/N:- I do not own Bleach or the characters. Many thanks go to my muse for this story...you know who you are hun...

Balls of Bankai

Kuchiki Byakuya looked on impassively as the gang of youths surrounded him, the only indication he gave that he even noticed their presence was that he stopped, and that was only because it would have been undignified to plough through them.

"Give us your money, rich boy." The self-proclaimed 'leader' of the group had a whiny nasally voice which, no matter how hard he tried, would never be intimidating. They were from Rukongai, and either hadn't noticed, or were too stupid to care, about his Captain's haori.

Byakuya raised one eyebrow fractionally, a great show of emotion for him; however, this lack of fear seemed only to enrage the gang.

"I said give us your money!" He snarled, drawing a crude axe he had clearly made with a saw blade and some rope. "Or do you want to fight?"

Byakuya would have laughed had he been the sort of man to show emotion, as it was he simply stared at the boy with cold grey eyes.

"I would not dirty my hands, let alone my sword on you." His voice was soft and level, the tone was final.

The boy swung the axe surprisingly quickly for such an unwieldy weapon, of course that was still light years too slow for Kuchiki Byakuya who simply side-stepped gracefully out of the way.

Perhaps it was because the next attack was so unexpected, so outrageous, that Byakuya didn't see it coming until too late; but by then the foot had already connected with his crotch.

He managed to remain stoic while screaming internally, years of practicing holding his mask of nobility paid off and the only outer reaction to this intense pain was him swallowing hard – twice.

Anger blazed inside him and the first, and last, indication to the gang that they had made a dreadful mistake was one word.

"Bankai."

A/N:-Sorry it's random. It was written for my best friend after a conversation about what the wonderfully stoic captain would do if kneed in the balls….