She knew what they all thought of her.

The girl who got what she always wanted, the spoiled brat. The ditz that didn't care about anything but her own desires and whims. The top of her class but still a fake with zero originality. The popular girl that manipulated other people just for fun.

Shallow.

The word left a bitter taste in her mouth and a twist in her stomach. She knew that's what everyone thought about her, a petty brat.

It was so unfair.

Glaring at her reflection, she yanked the brush through golden strands hard. Her light skin was pale in the dawn's light, making her luminous periwinkle eyes seem larger than usual.

She pulled harder, wincing in pain. Why was she cursed with this face and body? What good did anything ever come of it? Pushing the brush harder, she squeezed her eyes shut with the pressure. Maybe she'll push away all the self-depicting thoughts away. Maybe she'll be able to push it all away and forget.

"What are you doing?"

Spinning around, Ino barely heard the brush clattered to the floor as she looked at the person who just walked into her room. A frown twisting her lips as she tried to hide her embarrassment.

"What do you want Shikamaru?"

Her voice was raspy with disuse, evidence of her isolation.

She didn't want people to see her so, frail looking, and she knew that with insomnia, the bags under her eyes were more pronounced.

She didn't want them to know that really, she wasn't as shallow as they all thought. That late at night she was forced to replay every moment of her pathetic life, all the worthless things she done. In reality she was no one special, just another pretty blonde.

Someone who couldn't protect or save the people she cared about.

Someone who can't help Konoha.

Someone who was impossible to love.

Glaring at one of her oldest friends, she felt a pang in the pit of her stomach.

Sometimes it too late to change the world's perception of you. Staring at the tall shinobi in front of her, taking in the careless ponytail that held chestnut hair with matching eyebrows that were almost comically thin and the bottomless eyes the color of coals; she felt a sharper pang of longing. It had taken her a long time to see it, but he really was something special.

"You're late."

Hearing his deep voice that sounded like he had just smoked a dozen cigarettes, a voice that sent her heart thundering in her chest, she felt the sorrow in her chest deepen.

Oh, she knew she was too late.

It was a lame excuse he had to admit, but after another sleepless night, he just had to check on her. Lately it seemed as if she was just slipping away, and despite his attempts at indifference, seeing his teammate and friend become more and more distant really disturbed him. Especially since she was girl who really ever mattered to him, the one who plagued his every damned thought.

Troublesome.

With his hands shoved into his pockets, back slouched against the wall, he narrowed his eyes until it looked as if he was resting. Seeing her sigh and turn to put her hair up, he took in her appearance.

Ino was particularly beautiful, which was why she was always in so much trouble. Lucky for her that she became a shinobi, because he couldn't count how many creeps tried to hit on her daily. She used to love her appearance, but since Sasuke and Naruto left, it seemed as if her love for life stuttered to a stop, leaving a shell of what she use to be.

This caused more problems than he cared to admit. The Ino-Shika-Cho trio was still together, sent on a mission monthly, and though between those each person was sent on separate missions. This didn't bother him really, expect what recently happened.

Unwillingly walking into the room, he sighed loudly before fixing a bored look on the fifth Hokage. Her youthful face looked tired and worried.

"Yeah?"

The lazy drawl was much huskier then before, but then again, chain-smoking did that to a guy's voice. Not that he really cared.

Tsunade hesitated before plunging right in.

"I'm taking Ino out of missions."

His face betrayed nothing as jet eyes met amber. Ino, off missions? This was not what he was expecting; in fact he was prepared to defend himself against any duties she felt like dumping on him.

"Oh?"

The woman sighed heavily, leaning back in her chair before answering. Shikamaru saw the weariness but was busy thinking of something else.

"She's a ticking time bomb Shikamaru, and I can't have someone who is unstable going out on important errands."

Watching Ino now, as she pulled up her hair just to drop it in a dejected way, letting the golden locks fall alluringly down her slim form. A form that he noticed was becoming too slim. She always fretted about his and Chouji's appearance, but in reality she really didn't bitch about her own, if she didn't like how she looked she silently changed herself. But now….now she looked unhealthy. Dark circles under her eyes hinted at restless nights and fair skin had a cast of illness to it, rather than its radiant glow.

Why hadn't he noticed all the signs before?

Women were not his strong point. Period. They didn't follow through carefully planned out strategies, no, they changed tactic every two seconds. Creating a completely unpredictable pattern that only their insane minds could follow. Once he had listened to a conversation between Ino and Sakura. Never again. Bothersome creatures.

No, women were definitely not his strong point.

But seeing the skinny girl in front of him, Shikamaru felt guilt rise up in him. She had obviously taken the departure of Sasuke hard and had been slowly falling apart. This made the lazy shinobi upset for several reasons: she still felt something for the idiot that betrayed them, and she felt like she couldn't trust him or Chouji enough to confide in them.

He latched onto that excuse, even while his subconscious shouted at him. Those weren't the only reasons, and thinking of the other one always put him in a bad mood.

He had been avoiding Ino. A lot. It wasn't that he was tired of her or that he was busy. It was hard being around her anymore, seeing all that he wanted and knowing it was unattainable. Not that being away from her helped stop the yearnings, if anything, it had made them worse.

"I'm…sorry Shikamaru, I'm ready now."

Her subdued voice and deadpan eyes brought him out of his thoughts. Shrugging off the wall, he led the way out of the Yamanaka household. Over the years he had become familiar with the outline of the clan's buildings, having use to meet Ino on their way to the training grounds and then later on for missions. The Nara clan and Yamanaka clan were near each other, which was convenient for their fathers, who were good drinking buddies.

Leading the way out towards the streets of Konoha, he felt the urge to grab her hand, if only in reassurance. This was impossible though, after that moment in the Forest of Death during the first Chouin Exams. It was a nightmare and dream he relived during those few hours of sleep he ever got.

"You have to decide Ino, let her die or help her."

He felt terrible for making her decide, but he knew that this was a choice the young girl had to make on her own and he wasn't going to make a move until she answered him. Watching her gorgeous eyes widen with indecision as she watched the man beat the pink hair girl, he couldn't read the thoughts behind the expression and for a moment, wished that he could.

Time was ticking though.

"Come on Ino, what are we going to do?"

Chouji was for once, silent, all food disappeared as he caught the hand movement from his best friend. Shikamaru knew the answer already, but was still going to make her say it aloud for her own sake.

"I…..I….."

Her voice was hesitant, until she tore her eyes away from the scene before them and met his. He watched as her eyes stared intensely into his own, feeling heat settle in the pit of his stomach. This was not the time to let his precise control slip. He couldn't open his mouth to speak, captured by the mysteries behind eyes the color of the sky behind clouds.

"Let's go guys, we got serious butt to kick!"

He gave her a quick nod before the three of them leaped over and into the fray.

A/N: The first part was from a dream, I was Ino. I don't know if I captured what I wanted but her feelings were very real, so I wrote this down. I'm not sure if this will go anyway or not; let me know what you think. Suggestions always are welcomed.

Update: I removed Chapter two.. It wasn't going where I had intended.. As of right now I'm writing the one that has what I wanted...sorry for the inconvience.