Author notes: Holy crap, I am so sorry. I did not mean for this to take so long to update. I was going to be better with updating and then, right after updating... Life took a hard turn left. I don't want to get too detailed, but I basically lost my best friend, the guy I thought I was in love with and the band I followed for three years in a single day. That sucked.

Disclaimer: I, Strange and Intoxicating -rsa-, do not own, think I own, or will ever own Final Fantasy VII or its Compilations. I write this because I need a release from the angst I need to giggle once in a while, too.

Day 10 Part 3

And by wait, I didn't mean a full year. Actually, I was rather impressed by the speed they responded. Actually, for that matter, so was Zack.

"Huh, guess the Queen is off work today," Zack said as I opened the email, staring blankly at the half smirking picture of Sephiroth without his shirt, sweat glistening down his chest, rivulets running down to the leather strap of his belt, slithering down into his pants...

Holy Shiva on a stick, that was a nice photo.

"Congratulations on becoming a member of the Silver Elite." Zack patted me on the shoulder and gave me a half smirk, half smile. "We took those pictures as a gift for the fanclub after they set up this huuuuuuge flower stand after Sephiroth got back from one of his first expeditions in Wutai... I told him to take off the shirt! Definitely worth it."

I couldn't agree more, but I wasn't abut to let him know it. Instead, I read through the information, including a little spot for me to fill out oto become a member-wait.

What do you mean I have to give them a copy of my ID and fifteen hundred Gil!? And a renewal fee of a thousand Gil every year? And I am expected to do WHAT with Sephiroth's picture?!

"You don't have to shout it... It's for stuff like servers and pictures and blackmailing and bribing staff members for super secret information on Sephiroth's whereabout..."

"But I am broke!"

Zack frowned. " Yeah, about that... Well, since this is top secret stuff, we can't let you write it off or nothing..."

Oh, thanks. I haven't eaten a full honest meal in Gaia knows how long, and I wouldn't even be getting my paycheck until the end of the month, and I am already hungry... And so tired... And now I was supposed to infiltrate the scariest group this side of the Turks.

I glared balefully at Zack. His ears almost drooped.

"I'll call your bank! Pinky promise! And I'll take you to dinner tonight! Oh man, I know this great restaurant that makes these great meat stick things that they light on fire in front of you! Actually, I want to take you and Cloud 'cause Cloud had the night off and of course afterwards you and Cloud can go pay off the Queen and everything will be great!"

"Queen?" Oh, no. I did not like the sound of that.

Zack nodded enthusiastically. "Queen is the head of the Silver Elite. No one knows her by anything but Queen, and to a lot of Sephiroth fans she is. We have no idea how she gets all her information. She has some super scary inside connections and Sephiroth has been trying to find out who she was for like ever but it isn't that easy. Heck, she wears a mask when we meet her in real life! I have met her two times and even now I have no idea who she could be. It's the biggest secret in Midgar!"

"More than the drugs I put in my boss's coffee?"

"Yes!"

Zack spun my chair around and kneeled in front of me. "Sai, can I tell you a secret?"

His blue-purple eyes were so wide and innocent I could do nothing but nod.

"Sai, I think she is a Goddess!"

I couldn't help but let my eyes roll back in my head. "Zack, she isn't a goddess. She is just a super scary stalker on a totally different level from any of us."

"But!" Zack yelled, "She knows everything! Everything I tell you! It is like she can read minds! She has to be a goddess."

I bit back my words, and instead leaned forward and pay Zack on the head. "There, there. I promise when I find out who she is, I will tell you."

The puppy blinked at me. "But she is like a ghost! This may be the only time you get to meet her."

"Wait, why do I have to meet her?"

Zack spun the chair back around and pointed at the email again, at the very bottom. "You need to be baptized in the healing spirit of Sephiroth's awesomeness, that's why."

They really didn't pay me enough.

"I want a raise."

Zack tittered. "Um, you know, I can't really promise that... You know I don't get to say how much money you make. Wait. How much money DO you make? I make like three hundred thousand Gil a year but I get extras if I do special assignments and sometimes these cool bonuses for getting rid of big mad monsters like this one time I killed a Behemoth all by myself. It was so freaking cool, Sephiroth said it was the fastest he had ever seen a Second bring one down! My reward for that was a really nice Wutian crafted vibra-"

I threw up my hands and screamed, "Fine! Fine! Just stop!"

Zack smiled wide. "Ok! Dinner it is. How about six o'clock? And I will call Sephiroth about the money stuff. Don't you worry, we will have all this sorted out tomorrow and you will be fine."

"But I don't have the money today to pay this Queen lady."

Zack shrugged. "'Kay. I got it. I'll put a little something in your account now so we can do this and even money for the bribing we are gunna need later. Remember that this is a solo mission that Shinra can't know about." Zack leaned down closer. He actually looked serious, one of the first times I had ever seen what would no doubt one day be a fine SOLDIER. "We think someone high up has been leaking information, so we have Turks sweeping our offices every day for bugs. This floor and the Turks floor are the only safe places in this building. There is enough credibility to it that we consider it an in-house... Issue."

Oh. That meant no talking about it anywhere but here. Okay. I gulped. This was some scary shit. I didn't sign up for this.

Zack smiled. "It comes with the territory."

Chipper and smiley Zack was back, running a hand through his hair. "So, 7?"

"Yeah, sure. Just bring the cash with you, I don't have time to stop at the bank right now. I only have 6 Gil anyway."

Zack smiled and skipped off, probably to bother Shouta-bait about dinner, and I fell into the blissful embrace of paperwork.

"You weren't kidding about the 6 Gil!"

I felt my face involuntarily cringe. "Yeah, yeah. It isn't cheap living in Midgar and I went through my savings pretty quick. It wasn't like I knew how expensive it was!"

We were sitting at a really nice restaurant on the Sector 6 plate, one of those places where the table spun around and you could pick and choose what food you wanted to eat. As the oldest and clearly most responsible member of the party, I had delegated myself as the person who would make sure that Cloud and Zack ate their vegetables.

"You know you will stay that size forever if you don't eat some of this green stuff," I told Cloud as I spun the table to a very nice salad and other assortment of green vegetables I didn't know the name of. Jumps vegetable consisted mostly of anything that came in a can.

Cloud glared and spun the table to meat. "You could say the same for yourself."

"How old are you? Fourteen? Thirteen?"

Cloud's ears went pink. "I'm just short for my age. That's all."

Zack smiled and reached for a long skewer of meat. At least it wasn't man meat. "Cloudy is sixteen! I looked at his chart."

"He's sixteen and I am Leviathan."

Zack tilted his head to the side. "You mean that snake I killed?"

It took everything in my not to impale myself with one of the wooden skewers.

"Yeah, Zack. The snake you killed."

After dinner (which was probably the best thing I had ever eaten in my entire life. I even asked for the extras to be put in a bag for me to take home. Payday wasn't for another two weeks and I really did need to eat) we headed out toward Sector 5, where I was told we would be meeting the ever elusive Chairperson.

I am not gunna lie, I was nervous. I could feel the tiny scabs on the back of my skull from the stitches I needed because of Reno's paperweight and my fluttering and shaking eyelids. I hadn't slept in so long and that, coupled with the stress, had my eyelids twitching.

Thank Shiva tomorrow was going to be my day off.

I think it was Zack who saw her first, but maybe it was Cloud, who grabbed me by the arm and told me me to "not say anything stupid under my breath."

Oh, Shouta-bait.

"Like that. Why do you keep calling me Shouta-bait? What does it even mean?"

I felt my face flush and opted not to tell him, instead taking out the envelope that Zack had given me, as well as my ID. "Don't worry about it, Chocobo."

I knew the nickname bothered him and took just a little pleasure in watching him snarl that he wasn't a Chocobo.

I felt Zack gently push me forward towards the woman in her black cloak. "Let's do this."

"You are coming with me, right?"

"We'll be right behind you. But.. Be careful. She's a..."

"Goddess. Yeah, yeah. Sure, Zack." I swear, what was this woman to have even Zack creeped out? Probably really good with cold reading or something.

I bit the bullet and stepped forward, holding the envelope tightly as to not give away my trembling hands.

"Sai Lynn Matenson. Twenty years old, born on October 30th, 980. Graduated from Junon University on the 18th of May, 0000. Your parents are David and Mariko Matenson. Your mother is a quarter Wutaian, though you have absolutely no connections on either side to any radicals. Your Wutaian heritage is only in your name, which is actually short for Saiko but your mother thought it sounded too close to the word psycho in Continental, so she cut it."

I stared at the black figure, willing my mouth to open.

She continued. I noticed the delicate lisp of her voice, sweet and well tempered. "You graduated near the top of your class, but were beat out by General Toman's son, Jeff. You egged his dorm room in your second year because he cheated off of your Continental history test. You have a bad habit of talking out of turn, and once got in trouble for threatening to cut a boy's penis off after he grabbed you during gym class when you were nine."

How in the... How. Was this woman magic? Oh my Holy, was Zack right?

"You joined Shinra by accident and are now a new employee. Congratulations on your new job."

At this point, she held out her hand. "Your documents."

I stared, and yeah. My jaw was definitely hanging. I couldn't even try to pick it up.

She shook her hand again. "Documents."

I felt something hit me in the leg and that was enough to jolt me out of my stupor, and I quickly handed off my envelope to the... Well... A goddess? Maybe?

"How did you know any of that?" I finally whispered, the words coming out like a desperate croak.

"And let us no forget about that little incident over the summer... In fact , I have seen the pictures. Do you think that Zack and Cloud would like to see them, too?" She reached for her phone, but I was already on my knees.

"No! No! The don't need to see that! No one needs to ever see that!"

A moment of genuine panic. If anyone ever saw those pictures... I thought I had destroyed them all! Fuck.

"Does she do this rambling thing often?"

"Where she thinks she is talking to herself but everyone can hear her?" I heard Cloud say. "Yeah, seems so."

But I was too busy kneeling before my new overlord to comment.

"Oh, just stand up. She isn't going to hurt you," Cloud said and Zack stifled a laugh.

I slowly picked myself up on the ground and wiped my hands on my pats, warily glancing at the person in the black cloak. I got a sneak peak at her mouth before it was hidden again in the darkness.

She was definitely a she, with delicate features. I couldn't make anything else out, but she was definitely not someone I wanted to get on the bad side of.

The Queen looked through the envelope and nodded. "It seems everything is in order, except for one thing..." She tilted her head toward me, expectantly. "You need a username."

It should have occurred to me long before this point, but it hadn't even crossed my mind. Like, Zack had his name and no doubt Cloud had one of his own, so of course I would need one...

Uh...

"How about... Amarissia?"

"Taken. She writes gay Angeal and Zack porn."

"Ardwynna?"

"Sephiroth and Genesis writer."

"Jukebox Hound?"

"No."

"Kiraya?"

"Now you are just fucking with me."

Uhhh.

"Strange and Intoxicating?"

"You know that spells Sai, right?"

I nodded my head. "Yeah... I guess it could give me away..."

But Zack interrupted before I could come up with another name. "I like it! You can definitely use that as a name, but you will need something shorter. Like, between six and ten letters for your log in name. So, Sai-what?"

"RSA?"

The woman clapped her hands together enthusiastically. "And there we have it! I bestow upon you the name and username of Strange and Intoxicating and sairsa! Rsasai? Which do you prefer?"

"I don't really care."

My lack of enthusiasm did not bother the woman, and she quickly handed me a little packet and a card, Sephiroth's face emblazoned across the front, the number "7835" raised on the plastic.

"Congratulations, you are officially a member of the Silver Elite... It is always good when we get someone who is able to work for Shinra! What exactly do you do?"

I wasn't sure if she was joking or not. Just a few moments ago she was telling me the detailed history of my entire life, but she didn't know my... She didn't know my job.

What do I do? Oh, Holy shit. What do I do?

"That is confidential information," Zack supplied, saving me from being forced to make the choice. "But I promise she will be as helpful as we are!"

I turned at this point to look at Zack, whose mouth really couldn't get any wider. He was way to fucking happy. No one was that happy.

The woman seemed to accept the answer, or at least wasn't digging for more information, which I was incredibly happy for.

"Expect your email to arrive soon. I look forward to your support."

And with a snap of her black cloak, she was gone.

"Hey, Sai? What did she have pictures of you doing over the summ-ow! Why did you hit me? That hurt!"

"Shut up."

"Does RSA stand for..."

"Reno Sinclair is an Asshole? Yeah, it does."

On the way back to my room, I logged on to my bank's website to see what Zack had put in. Maybe I could buy some groceries in my apartment, maybe even pick up a new blouse to replace the one I ketchupped all over.

The little spinning loading light nearly hypnotized me, and when I saw the black numbers of 150,006 Gil I was pretty sure I was hallucinating.

Because wait.

What.

WHAT.

WHAT?!

I am honestly so sorry that I wasn't able to write before this time. I have been so busy with work. Please forgive me for neglecting Sai and her hilariously stupid self.

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