Stan had just gotten off work, ready to get to his love, Kyle. Today was Kyle's birthday, so Stan had gotten off work early without telling Kyle to surprise him. He had gotten his present earlier that week, a golden Star of David on a white gold chain. He had even gotten the guy he bought it from to engrave 'I love you' in Hebrew on the back of the star for 100 or so extra bucks. He and Kyle had been together for at least 2 years, starting near the 2nd year of high school. They did everything together, so Stan decided after the 1st year together that they should move out of their parents' houses and get an apartment together. Stan had to get a part time job at a Bennigans to pay utilities and such, but thankfully his parents paid for rent and his car. Now don't be mistaken, Stan's parents didn't approve of their son moving into an apartment with his boyfriend at the tender age of 17, but didn't deter him from becoming an independent young man. Stan could still remember his mother who sobbed uncontrollably and his fathers rather serious persona as he said his goodbyes.

Stan sighed as he finally reached his apartment. It was a decent apartment. Nothing too extravagant, but at least he wasn't afraid of getting mugged so that was good. He parked in his usual spot and exited the car, present in hand. His car wasn't outrageously awesome either. Just a blue Honda. But, hey, it gets you places. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed one red, dinged up car.

'Kenny? I wonder what he's doing here? I guess to wish Kyle a happy birthday, I suppose. That probably means Butters is there, too. Just perfect. Maybe they'll leave soon. Hopefully.'

It was a known fact that Kenny and Butters were going out. Not liked they hid it or anything, or at least Kenny didn't. He molested the easily embarrassed Butters quite often. He once walked into the public boys bathroom to hear them fucking in a stall. That had left poor Stan mentally handicapped for a couple minutes. They, too, were living together in a rather remote area near their high school. He'd only been there once, and yet he knew he would never want to go there again.

Stan snapped out of his thoughts and continued walking into the apartment buildings. Stan and Kyle lived on the second floor of the three-story building, which he guessed was nice since bugs wouldn't get in. Usually. He took out his keys and quietly opened the door. He thought of calling out to see if Kyle was home, but that would ruin the surprise. He put his keys back in his pocket as he tiptoed in and quietly shut the door. Kicking off his shoes, he put the present on the kitchen table and headed for their bedroom. As he neared, he heard voices coming from the bedroom…or rather sounds. Moaning sounds. Stan's heart sped up as he listened through the door. He could make out Kyle's pleas for someone to go faster. His heart dropped as he pieced together the puzzle of who that someone Kyle was pleading to, but the voice he heard next totally confirmed his suspicion.

"Kyle…"

That broke Stan's heart even further. Stan began to wonder what to do. Jump in and surprise this little get-together or wait until they were finished. Another moan answered for him as his anger flared to a height of monstrous proportions.

"Fuck this shit."

With that Stan flung the door open hard enough to leave a dent in the wall to see Kyle and Kenny climax. Their eyes shot open as they stared at the fuming Stan whose grip on the doorknob tightened tremendously. Stan's face was red with anger as he glared dangerously with his beautifully deep blue eyes. The color, however, didn't seem blue at the moment, but rather red.

"S-Stan?! What are you doing here?!"

"What am I doing here? What the fuck am I doing here? I fucking live here!! What the FUCK is this?! I got off fucking early from my fucking job to get home to my fucking boyfriend for his fucking birthday and I find him FUCKING. OUR. FRIEND!! Or at least he was my friend. Not fucking mine anymore! What the Fuck?! How could you do this to me?! And you Kenny! What the fuck, don't you have a fucking boyfriend?! How fucking long has this been going on?!"

Stan could feel his anger growing by the second. Seeing their naked bodies together caused him to clench his teeth together harshly. He could feel his eyes fill with hurt, angry tears. His heart pounded so loudly as adrenaline coursed through his veins.

"Just…just calm down, Stan."

" Calm down? Calm DOWN?! Don't you fucking tell me to calm down, asshole! You're in my house, fucking my boyfriend, in my fucking bed, don't you fucking dare tell me to calm down!! Does Butters know you're here?! Does he?!"

"I-I told him I was going to…to get more apples, cause we were out…and-and their his favorite."

"Well then, I'm sure he'd really like to fucking know what you're doing now!!"

With that Stan whipped out his cell phone and began to dial Butters number.

"S-Stan, wait! Just…hold on a second!"

Stan ignored Kenny' plea as the phone ringed once. Kenny jumped out of his bed and pulled his pants on.

'He didn't even bother to wear underwear.'

The phone rang a second time as Kenny attempted to lunge for it. Stan jumped out of the way as Kenny's hand barely grazed the cell phone. The phone rang a third time. Stan dodged another lunge from Kenny and pushed him back when he got to close for his liking. Kenny almost lost his balance, but regained his footing after a second. Finally, the sound of a voice filled the now quiet air.

"Hello? Butters speaking."

"Hey, Butters. This is Stan."

"Oh, well, hey Stan. W-what's up? Are you looking for Kenny? He's not…"

"No, I know where Kenny is. In fact, I'm standing right next to him."

"You're at the market, too? Isn't today Kyle's birthday? Well, shucks, you should p-probably get home to wish him a happy birthday! You're off work early? Wow, that's neat-o that they let you leave so early!"

Stan's expression darkened. He felt incredibly bad for poor Butters. He was contemplating on forcing Kenny to tell him. That sure would make it all the fulfilling. He decided not to, though. No, he had to do this.

"Butters, there's something you need to know. Kenny and I, we aren't at the market."

"Y-you're not? Then…then where are you guys?"

"Butters…Butters…Kenny's… Butters, Kenny has been cheating on you. With Kyle. I'm sorry."

"C-cheating…? But-but…isn't Kyle your boyfriend…I mean…what?"

"You're right. Kyle was my boyfriend, but now…"

There was a pause on the phone as Stan heard Butters give a shuddering breath.

"You…you're sure? Positive?"

"Butters, he's right next to me. Ask him yourself."

Stan handed Kenny the phone, who took the phone with an expression of pure guilt and terror plastered on his face. He began to stutter, much like Butters did when he was younger. Stan could hear him uselessly try to explain his predicament. Stan turned to glare at Kyle, whom he had trusted more than anyone in the world. Kyle looked at Stan, then turned away guiltily and dropped his face in his hands as he began to cry miserably. Stan couldn't conjure up any sympathy for Kyle at the moment.

'Serves you fucking right, you whore.'

He turned back to Kenny who was near tears as his voice got increasingly anxious. Stan could hear sniffling on the other end of the phone.

"Baby, please…"

"NO! We're through! I-It's over!"

His heart and stomach dropped as he heard Butters drop the phone and begin to sob. He felt extremely bad for Butters. The poor kid, having sucky ass parents and an even suckier boyfriend. At least his parents still cared for him. Kenny dropped the phone as well, crying bitter tears of resentment of what he had done. He grabbed his shirt and keys and ran out of the apartment room. Stan picked up the phone and attempted to comfort Butters, whose sobs could be heard throughout the entire room despite him being on the cell phone. Stan couldn't bear hearing the poor kid weep that way. He tried to think of some way to cheer up Butters, and himself. Despite just having caught him in the act of adultery, he still loved Kyle. A lot. He needed something to clear his mind, to allow him to make smart, well thought out decisions. Suddenly, an idea popped into his head. He hastily checked his pockets to see if his car keys were still there.

"Hold on, Butters. I'm going to get you. You can stay at my house until you figure out what to do. Pack your stuff."

With that Stan hung up his phone and began to pack some of his own clothes.

"Stan…please. Don't…don't go."

Stan ignored Kyle as he packed his charger and entered the bathroom to get his toothbrush. He could hear Kyle begin to sob as he zipped up his suitcase.

"Please, Stan!"

Stan felt arms around his waist and tears soak in between his shoulder blades. Kyle had been at least 2 inches shorter than Stan when they last checked to see who was 'manlier' as they put it. Stan, however, could feel his heart breaking further as he pulled angrily away from Kyle. He wanted nothing more than to comfort his crying lo…ex-lover, but he had to know that you couldn't cheat and expect you're partner to be all howdy-do about it. As he walked out, Stan could only mutter this:

" I hope you had a wonderful fucking birthday."

And with that, Stan was gone.

AN: Hello peoples!! I just want you to know that I'm not abandoning my other story. In fact, I'm trying to write the chapter now. I need fanart or something!! Not for my stories, just Kenny/Butters in general! C'mon people!! Give me some motivation, damnit!

Anyway, this story is just a stress reliever. Writing 'fuck' multiple times is actually really fun. I'm not sure how long this little doozy will be. Possibly 3 chapters. SO...other chapters may be longer. I don't know. And critique a little please, but don't flame! I tried to get my sister to do it, but she has the attention span of a noodle.

Sister: Actually no i don't...i think i have a great attention span...i just don't care...and one more thing...I'm better than you!!

Me: STFU BEOTCH!