-gasp- An update! I know, I know...it's been awhile. But anyways, here it is! There's a few notes to add before I start though...

There is a quote from The Office in here, and whoever gets it gets a prize. What's the prize? Knowing that you know something that other people don't. And yes, in real life I am shorter that Taub. And at the end I will list all the episodes that are referenced in this chapter.

Thanks, and you know what to do! :)

Oh, and I have no intent of getting rid of Kutner. He's staying. :)

(The usual theme song plays as the doctors file on stage, this time remember that Taub, Thirteen and Kutner are included. They all wave to the screaming fans in the crowd and they make their way over to the center of the stage where there the seats are. There are now magically enough for everyone, and the seat arrangement is as follows: Foreman, Chase, Cameron, Cuddy, House, an empty seat, Wilson, Taub, Kutner and Thirteen. Then, Revengent walks onto the stage and sits in the empty seat that is between House and Wilson.)

Revengent: Hello and welcome to the eight episode of Ask a Doctor!

Cuddy: We've been waiting long enough. We're locked into this contract and we weren't doing anything.

Kutner: Yeah, I've been really excited for this!

Revengent: Well, don't worry, because it's time to answer those questions now. First off, let's have a question for one of our newer members of the show, Taub. This is from leSophsters, and she wants to know: Why are you such an arrogant jerk?

Taub: (Looks up in shock.) Excuse me? I'm not arrogant; I just get annoyed at things. I don't have a lot of time, so when people do things that are dumb, don't think you wouldn't get pissed off either. Because you would.

Revengent: That sounds a little bit like House. Here's another question from leSophsters that is for Thirteen. Why do you get all of the good storylines, and have you filed for a restraining order for the writers yet?

Thirteen: I get the good story lines because I'm interesting and it reflects House's own issues that he needs to deal with. And why would I get a restraining order for the writers? They haven't done anything to me, except pair me with that guy. (Points to Foreman.)

Revengent: That sounds like a good reason to me to get a restraining order. Anyways, here are some questions from aradiea. (Checks pulse.) And by the way, yes, I am very much alive. Thanks for asking. The first two questions are for Thirteen. Would you ever go for Cameron or Cuddy? And how does it feel dating the least popular character on the show?

Thirteen: No, I wouldn't ever go for Cameron or Cuddy. They're both taken. And for the second question… (shudders). I don't like "dating" Foreman at all. It's a delusion that the writers thought would be good.

Revengent: Trust me, a lot of people fear the number fourteen now. Anyways, House, do you like your new Ducklings?

House: No. I hate everyone.

(Kutner looks sad.)

Revengent: Well…okay then. Do you hate your job?

House: There are certain parts of it I hate. Having to get consent, talking to the patient, and having to be around these (points to the other doctors) people is what I hate.

Wilson: House, that's basically your whole job.

House: I know.

Revengent: Here's a statement from aradiea to Chase. It is: Go jump in a lake.

Chase: (Flips his hair out of his eyes) Why? What did I ever do to you?

Revengent: Apparently, they don't like you. The next question is for Cameron. I LOVES YOU! Will you break up with Chase?

Cameron: Um…we just got engaged so I don't think that will happen anytime soon…

Revengent: …and that made Hameron fans all over the world cry into their pillows. But…Taub!

Taub: …what?

Revengent: How does it feel to be so boring and unimportant? (Shows him the card.) That wasn't from me. Personally, I love you.

House: What is it with you and philanderers?

Revengent: (Blank stare.) I don't love him like I love Wilson. Just answer the question. (Mutters something.)

Taub: I'm not boring. You just can't appreciate my dead-pan humor.

Revengent: Correct. Kutner, here's your first ever question!

Kutner: (Straightens up in his seat.) Yay!

Revengent: (Reads card.) You are so cute!

Kutner: (Tilts his head.) That's not a question.

Revengent: No. No it's not. But it's a rather nice compliment.

Kutner: Aw, thanks! But I was hoping for a question…

Revengent: Well, sorry. Okay, here's one for Wilson. Araidea wants to know what you would do if she randomly appeared riding on a unicorn, and then saved you from the evil Revengent. (Frowns.) I am not evil!

Wilson: (Clearly uncomfortable.) I…uh…don't know?

Revengent: Let's just leave it at that. And the last one in the batch is for Foreman. Araidea wants you to know that she is a Foreman fangirl, and despises Chase.

Foreman: (Tears forming in eyes and he falls from the chair onto his knees.) Oh my God, THANK YOU!

Revengent: Uh, right. (She throws the card behind her and lets it fall somewhere behind her.) The next few questions are from RemyTheReaper. She asks Thirteen: WHY did you steal my name?

Thirteen: Her name is Thirteen?

Revengent: (Whispers.) I think she means Remy.

Thirteen: Oh. I didn't steal your name. Lots of people are named Remy.

Revengent: Okay, here's another for you. Will you marry Kutner and find a cure for Huntington's and have an adorable daughter and name her Leia...please?

Thirteen: That's an awful big plan. But…it sounds nice. (Sneaks a glance to Kutner.)

Revengent: And how about you Kutner? Same question. Only you'd marry her…not you.

Kutner: I love the name Leia! So…sure?

Revengent: How adorable. (Is in Kudley induced happiness.)

Foreman: What about me!? (Whines.) Thirteen!

Revengent: (Ignores.) So Kutner, the question that everyone wants to know: Star Wars or Star Trek?

Kutner: Oh man. Tough question. Do I have to choose?

Revengent: (Nods.)

Kutner: Hmm. I guess I'm going to have to go with…AH! It's too hard to pick one! So I pick Battlestar Galactica!

Revengent: Not an option, but I guess it avoids having to pick between the other two…anyways. Here's something for Taub from RemyTheReaper: I LOVE YOU! In a completely platonic way. Keep being awesome.

Taub: I don't know what to say…

Kutner: Thank you, maybe?

Revengent: See Taub, you have awesome people that like you. Oh hey, Foreman?

Foreman: (Hopeful.) Yes?

Revengent: RemyTheReaper wants to know: Will you just go hide in your closet now and never come out?

Foreman: Why does everyone pick on me? (Pouts.)

Revengent: Get over it. And here's one for Cuddy: Now that you have a kid, are you going to let House anywhere near her so that he can corrupt her, or are you going to break the hearts of all the Huddy fans and keep him away?

Cuddy: Would you let your kid near House?

Revengent: I don't have any kids. And you can't ask me questions.

Cuddy: (Shrugs.) I guess I wouldn't mind having Rachel around House, as long as he doesn't make her as cynical as him. (Pause.) And when I say Rachel, I'm talking about my baby, not Taub's wife.

Revengent: Yeah, why the frick is there two people named Rachel?! It gets so confusing.

House: GOD. Stop complaining. Get on with the show.

Revengent: Fine. (Sticks out tongue.) Here's a…statement for Taub from bedlamandbroomsticks. (Sulks.) God, you have a bigger chip on your shoulder than Foreman, and he has a reason. Grow up.

Taub: I don't have a reason? (Jumps out of chair.) And what's Foreman's reason? I have plenty of reasons! My marriage was crap, I'm going broke, House constantly makes fun of me, I lost my wonderful job, almost nobody writes about me and I'm constantly made fun of because of my height-

House: All of which are your fault.

Taub: How the hell is being short my fault?!

Revengent: (Runs over to Taub and stands next to him.) You're taller than me! See?

Taub: (Looks down at Revengent.) Wow, you are short.

Revengent: (Sighs.) Yeah, I am. Now sit back down. (Taub does, and Revengent sits back down too.) Here's a question for Thirteen from Arrin: I know you're a big girl who can make your own decisions, and after being handed the short end of the stick when it comes to life, you deserve all the happiness you can get; but if I may ask, why Foreman? What attracted him to you?

Thirteen: I…don't know. I'm kind of confused about the whole situation. I think that may have not been Huntington's drugs that I was given…

Foreman: (Looks uncomfortable.)

Taub: If you hurt her, I swear, I'll kill you.

Kutner: Yeah!

Foreman: Uh…

Revengent: Anywho, moving on…okay, here's a question for House from Piper -loves you-. Are you SURE you don't like Wilson? You two would make such a cute couple!

House: Ugh. (Bangs his head against the armrest of Revengent's chair.)

Kutner: HAHA. Seriously, I never thought about it, but you two together make sense…

Wilson and House: SHUT UP.

House: We're not gay.

(Everyone waits for alarms to go off. They don't.)

Taub: You don't have to be gay to be with someone. You can be two people who happen to be attracted to each other.

House: What kind of logic is that? And you shouldn't talk. People are calling you and Kutner the new Hilson.

Taub: What the *&%# is Hilson?

Cameron: It's one of the ships of the show. You know, House and Wilson? Hilson. House and Cuddy is Huddy. Me and Chase together is Chameron. You and Kutner together is…Kaub? (Whispers to Chase.) Do they have a ship name?

Taub: I'm married! I don't want a ship name-

Kutner: Yeah. That is…weird.

Revengent: (Trying to regain control.) Right. Come on. (Grows impatient.) PAY ATTENTION! (Everyone stops chattering.) Here's a couple of questions from glitterxxxx.

Foreman: That's a lot of X's.

Revengent: Don't insult the reviewers! (Throws card at him.) glitterxxxx asks Cuddy this: What really happened with the third implantation, did you really lose the baby?

Cuddy: Yes, I really lost it. (Sad face.)

Revengent: But that's okay, you have a kid now! And House: What do you think of Stephan Fry?

House: He's one of the two funniest guys ever.

Revengent: That was concise. Okie dokie, here's is some questions from LEP's007. First for House: What do you think of Hugh Laurie?

House: Oh, he's the other funniest guy ever. And he's quite sexy too, if I do say so myself.

Revengent: (Holds up a picture of Hugh that she randomly got from somewhere and compares it to House. She then shrugs, then puts the picture away from the random place where it came from.) The next question is for House. Who's your idol?

House: Socrates.

Revengent: Nice pick. Next: What super hero powers would you like to have and how would you use them?

House: I have superpowers. Super diagnostic skills. (Waggles his eyebrows.)

Revengent: If you say so. Here is one last one for you for awhile… What would you do with Chase if he was your personal slave for a week? How about Cuddy?

House: (Grins.) Well, if it was Chase, I would torture him.

Chase: (Groans.) Why?

House: …But if it was Cuddy… (looks over to Cuddy, who looks not pleased). Well, you all know what I would want her to do. But I don't force people into that sort of thing.

Revengent: (Mumbles.) I don't think you'd have to really force her…

Cuddy: What was that?

Revengent: Nothing. Oh here's one something for you Foreman: I WANT TO MARRY YOU! I'D FIGHT THIRTEEN FOR YOU!

Thirteen: Please do.

Foreman: I love all this love for me today. IN YOUR FACE CHASE!

Chase: I still have an overwhelming number of fans more than you.

Foreman: You know what? You just don't want to let me win!

Chase: That would be correct.

Revengent: Please stop! (Mumbles.) I always have to break up fights between you two… Here's the next question from LEP's007 and it is for Kutner. How is Harold doing?

Kutner: Um…I don't know anyone named that…I think there may be something blocking my memory. Oh! But there was a patient that House treated like five years ago that looks like someone that I think that in an alternate universe I would know as Harold and I would be Kumar.

Revengent: (Is quiet for about forty seven seconds before speaking.) Okay then. Chase: How do you think you stack up against Edward Cullen?

Chase: That weird vampire kid? I would be able to kick is arse. I have much better hair and I don't need to freaking sparkle. I win.

Revengent: And I agree. Here is the last question from LEP's007 and it is for Cuddy: House and you get married, where would you honeymoon? No, do NOT avoid the question by saying it would never happen or that the marriage wouldn't last that long.

(The Huddies in the audience seat on the edge of their seats.)

Cuddy: Okay, if House and I were to ever get married, which I'm not avoiding the question since I was told not to, I think that we would go somewhere far away so we wouldn't have to deal with work or the people at work. Maybe…Italy?

House: I was thinking more like LA.

Cuddy: Well, the question is for me, not you!

Revengent: Moving right along… (Flips through cards). Here's one from RavennaNightwind. The first one goes to Thirteen and Foreman: Why the random make out session?

Foreman: Because I had this voice in my head telling me to.

Thirteen: I don't know. My memories from that night are kind of fuzzy…I think it may have been that tumor that was in my head that later magically poofed was pressing on my brain and it was affecting my decision making.

Revengent: Well, that's just tragic. Now, here's a question from Amethyst Princess 27. She asks all of you: What is the one thing that has left you scarred for life?

Wilson: Well for me, I would have to say it would be seeing House almost die like fifty thousand times.

House: It is not fifty thousand times. Maybe more like…six times? I lost count.

Foreman: Seeing Chase's FACE scarred me.

Chase: A lot of people think my face is really pretty, actually.

House: (Sings.) I feel pretty, oh so pretty…

Everyone: …I feel pretty and witty and…

Chase and Foreman: …GAY! (Both look over at House, who is laughing.)

Chase: Ha ha, very funny.

Foreman: I didn't think it was funny…

Revengent: Oh my God it's sarcasm! Read a book! Can we please get this question answered?

Thirteen: (Rocking in her chair with her knees hugged against her chest.) Fore…man…

Taub: Getting fooled into think that we killed that hooker that House hired scarred me for life. I almost had a heart attack when she sat up and started breathing again.

Kutner: Oh man, yeah! That freaked me out! Then you pretty much mauled me…

Taub: Sorry. I couldn't help but reach out and hug you when I thought that someone dead had came back to life.

Revengent: Thank you guys. So now we are waiting for Cameron, Cuddy and House to answer. (Hands defibrillators to Kutner.) I'm going to let him go with these if you guys don't hurry up.

Cameron: (Says this quickly, eyeing the shiny defibrillators.) There was this guy that came into the ER and he was smelly and I asked him what was wrong, because he looked very sad. Because you know me, I'm like a big fluffy teddy bear, except when I'm angry because then I'm like a demon teddy bear that wants to attack you. But anyways, I asked him again what was wrong and he didn't say anything, so because I'm persistent I asked him again and he ignored me, and after I asked him like eight more times, I thought he was going to say something but he took a deep breath then fell on the floor. I freaked out and started being all doctor-like and I pushed up his sleeve to feel his pulse and in the process of doing so I saw that there was this huge piece of metal jammed in his stomach! And then I read his medical alert bracelet that said that he was a mute. And that was the worst experience of my life.

(Everyone is staring at Cameron, who had everyone totally lost. Cuddy is the first to recover.)

Cuddy: When did this happen? I never knew about it.

Cameron: It happened when you had your baby drama. I thought it would be best to not bother you with it.

Cuddy: That's very…thoughtful of you. But anyways, to answer the question, the most scarring moment for me would have to be thinking that I was going to have a baby, then have all hope taken away from me.

Revengent: You have Rachel!

Taub: What? Why-

Cuddy: The kid! Not the grown up! (Sighs.) Yes, I do have a kid now…where ever she is…I hope she's being looked after…

Revengent: Don't worry; I have her being monitored by a babysitter. (Suspiciously pulls out her cell phone and begins texting.)

Kutner: What about you House? What scarred you for life?

House: I was in a freaking bus that turned over like four times. Does that answer enough for you?

Revengent: (Shuts her phone.) It sure does. Now here we have a question from the girl. It says: QUIT CHASE BASHING! (Flings card behind her, leaving the mess for someone else to clean up.) Well, stuff just happens on here and I can't promise anything. Chase sets himself up for a lot of stuff though…

Chase: I FOUND THE FLUFFERNUTTERS! (Holds up a plate of the sandwiches that appeared out of nowhere, because Revengent sure didn't make them.)

Revengent: …just like that. Here is question from RandomDice for Huddy – House and Cuddy: Are you secretly dating? Married? Lovers? Parents to kids together?

House: Wouldn't you like to know?

Huddy fan from the audience: YES I WOULD!

Cuddy: Well…

(A loud explosion goes off and everyone screams bloody murder. Nobody is getting killed, although a few of the anti-Foreman fans try to. The lights go out and there is mass panic, because nobody can see who is speaking and the microphones are off, so answers are not being heard. But shouts can be heard however, because when there is a blackout for some reason, people have a tendency to freak out. There are some things that can be made out, but it is not known who is saying them.)

"What the hell happened!?"

"I'm afraid of the dark!"

"Well, IS THERE HUDDY OR NOT?"

"Noooo! You stepped in the fluffernutters!"

"Oof. That was my foot!"

"I HAVE HEMORRHOIDS!

"Dear God, who just touched me there?!"

"Mommy!"

"SHUT UP!"

(The lights and power turn back on as Revengent's voice echoes through the room. She is standing in her chair with her hands up the air, asking for peace. The crowd is all scattered now and they are trying to find their seats. Chase is sitting in Wilson's lap, and when he realizes he isn't Cameron, and that Wilson just happens to have silky smooth hair like her, he falls on the floor landing on his bum. Foreman is hiding under his chair [how he got under there is a mystery] and is glaring at a few members of the audience who are glaring back at him with contempt. Thirteen has peanut butter and marshmallow all over her shoes and when Chase sees this, he crawls over to her shoes and begins to beat them.)

(Looking over to Kutner, we can now see the cause of the blackout. Kutner is holding the defibrillators and they are smoking. Taub looks rather pissed off and is holding his chest, and his and Kutner's shirts look singed. We can only assume that Kutner's hands slipped and accidently shocked Taub, and there was some sort of power surge that caused the madness.)

Cuddy: …and that is the answer to that question.

Revengent: (Plops down in chair.) WHAT? We missed that question?!

Cuddy: (Shrugs.)

Taub: Damn it! (Kicks the plate of fluffernutters.) I wanted to know!

Chase: Stop kicking the fluffernutters like a football!

House: Don't you mean soccer ball?

Chase: Why don't you shut up?

House: You can't make me!

Chase: Well, you can just-

(There is another loud bang, but this time it wasn't a Kutner induced explosion, it was just Revengent firing a gun into the ceiling to gain attention.)

Revengent: Listen. To. Me. (Pieces of ceiling fall down, since she fired a gun in the air. She puts the gun back in her pocket.) Let's get on with this, m'kay? Here are two questions for Cuddy from Hollyclaw. First: Does it bother you that House's mom who is really old has fewer gray hairs then you do?

House: My mom's not that old.

Cuddy: Why do people have to point out my faults? I'm hot enough, right? (Cheers from crowd.) But really, it doesn't bother me to have grey hairs. It adds to my beauty.

Revengent: I must need a better television monitor of something, because I have never seen any grey hairs…oh well. Here's the next question: Why didn't you just ask House for a sperm donor like we wanted you to? It would be awesome to see you and House become a twisted couple.

Cuddy: Why do you guys always want to decide whose sperm goes in me?

Revengent: Why do you always ask questions instead of answering them?

Cuddy: I'm the good one! Why are you getting on to me?

Revengent: AH! Another question!

Cuddy: …I can't think of another question. So…about the original question. I don't know. It would be super awkward to come out and ask House I want your sperm. How do you really ask someone that?

House: Well, there's a really simple way. You ask, and then you and I go somewhere that can be alone and I provide it for you.

Revengent: There you go. Problem solved. House, here's a question for you from sailormoonfreak5311: Is it possible for you to get any funnier (not to mention sexy)?

House: Yes. Although I am the only human being that has obtained this level of sexiness.

Revengent: You're a legend in your own mind House. Here's a question for Thirteen: What were you thinking hooking up with Foreman? HE'S MINE!

Thirteen: You can have him.

Revengent: There you go. (Looks at card and giggles.) Now here's one for (giggles) Cuddy, Thirteen, Cameron and (giggles) Chase: What is it like to be the females on a show that is mainly male?

(Collective laughter from crowd and people on stage.)

Cuddy: We get hit on a lot.

Thirteen: Yeah, and random people start making out with us. Like that painter guy. He just grabbed me and started kissing me.

Cameron: But it does give us an ego boost. We're hot and smart.

Chase: Wait a second…I'm not a female!

Revengent: And that all the questions and all the time we have for today! Be sure to tune it next time to Ask a Doctor! and if there's something you want to know about these doctors, ask it!

(As the scene fades away, Chase is seen trying to argue with the others, saying that he is not a female, while the other doctors ignore him and talk amongst themselves.)

Haha. Well, you know the only way to have this keep going is for you to review and ask some questions. So go ahead, don't be shy :) I'd like to give a HUGE thanks to everybody that has reviewed and asked questions. Without you guys, it wouldn't be possible.

And for you people that are interested, here's a list of all the House episodes I made references to...the ones I don't list, I hope you know where they came from...

Love Kills: The episode with the guy that also plays Harold.
Adverse Events: Random guy making out with Thriteen.
Let Them Eat Cake: Where Kutner and Taub got pranked by House into thinking they killed a woman, then that she came back to life.
The Greater Good: Tumor that magically poofed from Thirteen's brain.